by Amber Garza
“I can understand that.” I sat on the edge of my bed, swirling my toe in the carpet making squiggly lines in the threads. “I wish I could’ve been there.”
Isaac let out a ragged breathe. “Me too. I would have given anything to have you in my arms when we sat in the waiting room. All those sick people and stuff. You know, hospitals always remind me of my brother.”
I bit my lip, thinking of the brother he lost to suicide. There were so many things we were missing out on in each other’s lives.
“Oh, Isaac I’m so sorry. I wish you would have at least called so I could have comforted you over the phone.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I guess I didn’t think of it. I was just so frazzled.”
He didn’t think about me? In his moment of need, I wasn’t the first person who came to mind. For the first time since I’d been back, I wondered if our relationship really would last.
“But I got your messages. What happened today?”
I swallowed hard, my throat burned. So badly, I wanted to tell him everything that happened that day but I couldn’t. He’d already been through so much. I wouldn’t add to that burden. His dad was safe and I would allow him to rest in that.
“Nothing. You know me. Sometimes I over-dramatize things.” I let out a stilted laugh.
“You sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah, fine.”
“Great.”
I could tell by the sound of his voice that he was relieved. For a moment I thought I might burst into tears. There was no one to talk to.
Even though I was talking on the phone with the only boy I’d ever loved, I felt completely and utterly alone.
That night I dreamt about the sculpture in our living room. It came to life and chased me around the house. Its eyes blazed like fire, its mouth filled with razor sharp teeth. When it caught me, it slashed me with its claws and chomped down on my leg, tearing my flesh. Blood spurted out of my body. I awoke in a cold sweat, trembling with fear.
Chapter Thirteen
The knocking on the door became more insistent. Where was Mom? I was sure it was Drake. Who else would be here this early on Sunday? I staggered out of my room, my hair sticking up all over my head, my pajamas wrinkled from a restless night’s sleep. In my bare feet, I padded down the hallway. When I passed Mom’s door, I could hear her snoring inside.
I maneuvered around the monstrosity in our family room and Mom’s piles of celebrity magazines, to get to the front door. When I finally reached it, I flung it open. The minute I saw who it was, I wished I had stayed in bed.
How awful did I look? I hadn’t even brushed my teeth yet. I clamped my mouth shut, and ran my tongue over my teeth, while patting down my unruly hair with my hand, but the curls sprung back out. It was no use. Besides, it was too late. Tanner had already seen me. The damage was done.
“Hey.” He smiled, despite how disgusted he must have been by my appearance. “You weren’t at church so I decided to come check on you.”
Attempting to talk without opening my mouth and frightening him with my morning breath, I said, “Yeah, I just overslept.” The truth was I was so ashamed of myself for reverting back to my old ways that I didn’t feel worthy of stepping foot back in the church. I couldn’t tell that to Tanner though. He would never understand.
“That’s okay. How about we go for coffee and I can fill you in on the message. It was a great service.”
I shook my head, glancing down at my disheveled appearance.
Tanner chuckled. “I can wait while you change.”
“It’s okay. I don’t want you to have to wait for me.”
“Hey, the first time I asked you to go to coffee you offered me a rain check. Well, I’ve come to collect and I won’t take no for an answer.” He winked.
I sighed. “All right. Come on in. But I’m warning you that you’re entering this loony bin at your own risk.” I spread my arms wide and let him step into our messy family room. His eyes widened when he took in the giant sculpture. As I closed the door behind him, he said, “Wow. That thing is terrifying. How can you stand it?”
I glanced back at the sculpture. It was pretty evil looking. I thought back to the nightmare I had about it. Honestly, I hadn’t really looked at it much after that. I was too scared the dream would come true.
“It is pretty creepy. My mom’s boyfriend got it for her. He says it’s chic.” I shrugged. “He’s a little eccentric.”
“I’ll say. Have you done any research on it?”
I shook my head.
“You might want to. It looks like some type of evil spirit. Maybe it’s an idol or some type of god or something. It could be dangerous to have it in your house.”
Shivering, I wrapped my arms around my body. What if he was right? Not that it would matter, because Mom would never let me get rid of it. But maybe this sculpture was the reason the nightmares and bad thoughts had returned. It was possible.
“Have a seat. I’ll be out in a minute.” I cleared a spot on the couch for him since Mom’s magazines and clothes took up much of it. My cheeks warmed with embarrassment at the clutter, but Tanner seemed nonchalant about it.
I raced back to my room to quickly change into a pair of jeans and a shirt. Afterward, I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. When I caught sight of my reflection, I almost screamed. I couldn’t believe Tanner had seen me looking like this. Splashing water on my face, I washed off the remnants of sleep. Then, I picked up my hair brush and ran it through the tangles in my hair. It still looked terrible, so I pulled it back into a ponytail. Looking in the mirror, I decided it wasn’t great, but it was the best I could do at the moment. I had no desire to leave Tanner alone in my house any longer. Also, I knew if I took too long Mom would wake up, and Mom in the morning was even scarier than me.
We went to Thatcher’s Coffee. After ordering drinks, we sat at a table in the corner. It was crowded with people and the chatter bounced off the walls. The scent of strong aromatic beans filled the air.
I sipped my white mocha, enjoying the sweetness on my tongue and the warmth as it slid down my throat. Settling into my chair, I glanced out the window at the dreary October day. It looked like it might even rain with the gray fluffy clouds blanketing the sky.
Tanner took a gulp of his coffee and then set it down on the table. “So, you want to tell me the real reason you weren’t at church today?”
I looked at him, surprised. “I told you the reason. What? You don’t believe me?”
Tanner smiled. “I can tell when you’re not being entirely truthful. You do this shifty thing with your eyes.”
I felt totally exposed. How had he learned to read me in such a short period of time? In some ways it creeped me out, but in another way it made me feel happy.
Fiddling with the rim of the mug, I said, “I just don’t know if I’m cut out for this Christian thing. I keep screwing up.”
“We all screw up. That’s the point. We need His grace.”
“Yeah, I know. But it’s not like I mess up every once in awhile. I do it, like, all the time. It’s like I haven’t even changed at all.”
Tanner shook his head. “That’s not true. You’re forgetting that I knew you before.”
I bit my lip, and looked up from the mug of coffee. “You didn’t really know me. We didn’t hang out or anything.”
“No, but we ran in the same circles so I knew enough. You’re a completely different person now. That’s why our friendship has meant so much to me. We were both so much alike before, and then we got saved around the same time. It’s so cool that we can relate to each other that way.”
The espresso machine roared to life from behind the counter, and cups clanged from a nearby table. Instinctively, I reached for my necklace, but it wasn’t there. In my haste to get ready, I had forgotten to put it on. It felt like a betrayal to Isaac. Guilt burned through me. As my fingers fluttered over my neck, I noticed Tanner eyeing the spot. His eyebrows raised slightly.
Lowering my han
d, I reached for my coffee, and took another sip. Foamy whip cream stuck to my nose. Grabbing a napkin off the table, I wiped it off. “But you seem to be doing so well, Tanner. You’re not messing up all the time like me.”
“I’m struggling just like you. This past week, I’ve done a lot of things I’m not proud of. But I know God forgives me so I can move on and try harder next time.”
“What if we can’t do any better though?”
Tanner smiled, his gleaming white teeth blinding me. “We can’t.”
Huh? I was expecting more of a pep talk than that.
“That’s why we need Him to help us.”
He was right, of course. I thought of how little I’d been praying and relying on God. Nodding, I smiled back at him. “Thanks. I needed this.”
“Glad I could be here for you.” He shot me a pointed look before grabbing his cup to take another drink.
“So, you were gonna tell me about the service I missed.” Suddenly, I was interested in church again.
He swallowed his coffee. “Oh yeah, it was interesting. It really hit home.” He leaned forward. “He talked about Satan attacking us and how we always needed to be on guard.”
Chills shivered up my spine.
“The whole talk made me think of this friend that my older sister, Rosie, had. A couple of years ago she totally changed. She started wearing all black, listened to depressing music and got all involved in weird stuff.”
My chest tightened. “Your sister or her friend?”
“No, Rosie would never do that. It was her friend. And they had been friends for years, but when she started acting like that Rosie stopped hanging out with her. I think she got in with the wrong crowd and was influenced by some guy or something. Anyway, Rosie used to always say that she thought the girl was demon possessed. My parents and I would laugh it off. We didn’t believe in that kind of stuff. Now, I’m wondering if she was right.”
He looked at me expectantly, but I found it hard to breathe, let alone talk.
“What do you think?” he asked.
I swallowed hard, forcing myself to draw breath. “I don’t know. I suppose she could have been.”
“But I mean, do you believe in that kind of stuff?”
The question was laughable. I wanted to tell him my whole story right there. But I wasn’t quite ready to trust him that completely. So instead, I just said, “Yeah, I do.”
He nodded. “Me too. I feel like I owe Rosie an apology now.”
“Is your sister a Christian?”
“I’m not sure. She believes in God and stuff but I don’t think she goes to church or anything. She’s in college now so we don’t talk much.”
“What ended up happening with her friend?” I had to know even though I didn’t really want to.
“Last I heard, she’d gone off the deep end big time. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was dead by now.”
I put my cup back down on the table. My stomach hurt too much to drink it now. My mind drifted to Haley and I wondered if that would be her fate too. Sighing, I stared out the window and gasped. He stood on the sidewalk, hands stuffed in the pockets of his black trench coat. He wore sunglasses even though the sun was hidden deep beneath the thick clouds.
“You okay?” Tanner asked, following my gaze.
As he did, Drake walked swiftly away from the coffee shop. I shivered. What was he doing here?
I was still shaking when we headed back to my house. Of course, I’m sure the coffee hadn’t helped with that. My hands trembled as I held them close to my body.
“Maybe he was just grabbing a coffee.” Tanner kept his hands on the wheel, his gaze fixed on the road as he drove. Light rain splattered the windows.
“Yeah, I guess.” I bit my lip so hard I thought it might bleed. I’m sure Tanner thought I was crazy, getting so upset about Drake being in front of Thatcher’s. Maybe I was. Only, something felt wrong. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but something odd was going on.
“Crazy weather, huh?” I decided to change the subject, and keep it light.
“Yeah. But it’s cool. I like the rain.”
“Yuck. Not me. I’m a California girl at heart.”
I felt his head swivel in my direction for a minute. “I bet Isaac would be happy to hear you say that.”
Nodding, I turned to stare out the window. Why did I feel bad when the subject of Isaac came up around Tanner? He was my boyfriend. I should be able to talk about him anytime I wanted. Still, I knew it upset Tanner and we’d had such a good morning. I didn’t want to ruin that.
“But it is prettier in Washington. A lot greener. In California the sun kills all the flowers and grass.”
This elicited a smile from Tanner. I smiled back. He offered to walk me up to the house when we got back, but I said no. That would make it seem too much like a date.
I climbed out of his car, gave him a quick wave and headed for the front door. When I was almost there, a funny feeling descended on me and stopped me in my tracks. Goosebumps tickled my arms, and my hair stood on end.
Someone was behind me, watching me. I could feel it.
Chapter Fourteen
I whipped around. He started walking briskly in the other direction, but he wasn’t fast enough. I’d already seen him.
I ran after him. “Why are you following me?”
Drake spun around and looked at me as if he just noticed me for the first time. He flashed me an innocent smile. “Why hello Kenzie.”
“Don’t why hello me. Why do you keep following me?”
Rain drizzled down, splattering his sunglasses, trench coat and slick dress shoes. My teeth chattered. I hugged myself to keep warm.
“I’m not following you.” He took off his sunglasses. His eyes were much darker than I remembered, and they seemed to stare into the depths of my soul. I shuddered under the scrutiny of his gaze.
“I saw you standing outside of Thatcher’s”
He tucked the glasses into the pocket of his trench coat. “I was getting coffee. In fact, that’s why I was returning to the car. I had forgotten to get out the one for your mom. I already drank mine.” After opening his car door, he reached inside and pulled out a paper coffee cup with a lid secured on top.
“Oh, well, I didn’t see you in there.” I felt a little stupid.
“You were in deep conversation with a boy. Is he your boyfriend?” He cocked an eyebrow as he closed the car door.
“No. My boyfriend lives in California. Tanner’s just a friend.”
“It looked like a little more than friendship if you ask me.” He winked, causing me to blush. “We better get inside. I don’t want to keep your mom waiting. You know how she can be.”
This made me chuckle. I followed him up the walkway and then realized I never did get a straight answer from him. Sure, I might have been wrong about him following me today but how would he explain being at Haley’s?
“What about the other day when I was at my friend’s house?” I asked as we neared the front door.
“What other day at your friend’s house?”
“I was at my friend Haley’s and you were in a car across the street. I know you saw me because you looked right at me.”
“Ah, yes. I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure if that was you or I would’ve stopped.”
“But what were you doing there?”
“I have a client on that street I was checking on.”
I narrowed my eyes. It seemed like a reasonable explanation. Maybe I was just being oversensitive. Perhaps Mom was right. Ever since my experience with Wesley I had become so untrusting of everyone.
The door swung open. Mom stuck her head out, smelling strongly of hairspray. “What are you two doing standing out here in the rain?”
“Um…”I sputtered. The last thing I wanted to do was explain to Mom that I’d just given her boyfriend the third degree. It was precisely what she’d begged me never to do.
“We were just having a little chat, that’s all.” He bent down and pec
ked Mom on the cheek. “I was just telling Kenzie how much I care for her mother.”
Mom’s cheeks turned bright red. A broad smile swept over her face. Drake winked at me over his shoulder. I chuckled. Maybe the guy wasn’t so bad after all.
I brushed past them to get in the house. Mom closed the door behind Drake.
Holding her coffee cup in her hand she said, “Drake, just make yourself comfortable. I’m going to run into the kitchen and bring out some snacks.”
I plopped down on the couch, tucking my legs up under my body. As I reached for the remote, Drake took a seat next to me. I could hear Mom puttering around in the kitchen. After turning on the television, I flipped through the channels trying to find something on.
“I’m sure you have like a gazillion channels at your house,” I said to Drake. “We still have an antennae. There’s never anything on.”
“There’s nothing on even when you have cable,” Drake replied.
“That’s probably true.” I turned my head to see if Mom was coming in the room. I could faintly hear her still rooting around in the kitchen. It might take her awhile to find something edible in there. Fidgeting with the bottom of my sleeve, I tried to think of something to talk to Drake about. The silence was super awkward.
“So, do you have a lot of clients on Haley’s street?” I pictured all those rich ladies, their face frozen into perpetual smiles from all their botox injections.
“Whose street?” His brows knit together in a look of confusion.
“My friend that I was just talking about.”
“Ah, yes, Haley.” A shadow passed over his features. His smile turned into a scowl. “I thought you weren’t friends anymore.” His voice had taken on an evil, scratchy quality.
I jumped back, and clutched my hand to my chest. My heart beat against my fingertips. “How did you know that?”
“Here we are.” Mom swept into the room. In her hand she held a plate, containing a couple pieces of processed cheese, a handful of nuts and a sliced apple.
