Talk to the Paw

by Melinda Metz

  Madison shot David an are-you-hearing-this look. The man looked at David, too, his face hardening. “Nice move, hitting on a woman when she’s hormonal and vulnerable.”

  “I didn’t even—” David didn’t finish the sentence. Anything he said could make the guy, Sabrina, or both of them lose it. “I’m sorry.” That was absolutely true. He was extremely, massively, colossally sorry.

  “Let’s go home,” the man said to Sabrina, running his hand tenderly over her belly.

  Sabrina shoved herself to her feet. She smiled at David as if she hadn’t been ready to stab him with a fork a few minutes before. “You seem like a nice guy. I’m sure you’ll meet someone who’s right for you. I’m just not that person. I put up that profile when I was sort of upset.”

  “Not a problem,” David told her. He watched Sabrina and the non-ex-boyfriend walk out of the bakery. He kept watching until they were out of sight. Then he let himself take a breath.

  “I’m thinking reactive attachment disorder, her. Dependent personality disorder, him.” Madison said. She was thinking of studying psychology when she started college, and she had a diagnosis for everyone who came in.

  “I’d diagnose both as Coo-Coo for Cocoa Puffs.” David answered. “I’m going home.”

  His plan was to walk the beast, get a beer, then find sports of some kind, didn’t matter what, on TV and not have another thought until at least the next morning. But when he got home, he saw Zachary sitting on his front steps, Diogee leaning against him. The kid clearly had something on his mind.

  “What’s the up, my man?” he asked as he took a seat next to Zachary. Diogee got up and presented David with his butt. David began scratching it.

  Zachary held up a small book with a fuzzy purple zebra-print cover. “I found this outside the front door this morning.”

  David took it and flipped it open. The first page had a warning written in all caps with a black felt-tip pen: “ANYONE WHO READS THIS WILL BE DISMEMBERED.”

  “It’s Addison Brewer’s diary,” Zachary said.

  “You read it?” David asked, handing it back.

  “No. Well, only a little. To see whose it was,” Zachary admitted. “Now I don’t know what to do. If I give it back to her, she’ll probably kill me, because she’ll think I read it.”

  “Which you did,” David reminded him.

  “Not all of it,” Zachary protested. “I thought of sneaking it back onto her porch, but what if she caught me? She’d kill me. But there’s really personal stuff in here—”

  “Which you didn’t read,” David commented.

  “Not all of it,” Zachary said again. “It would probably make her nuts not to know where it was. Nuts-er. I was thinking maybe you could—”

  “No way. I’d do a lot of things for you, kid, but I’m not risking dismemberment,” David told him.

  “Maybe we could let Diogee chew it up?” Zachary sounded hopeful.

  Diogee’s tail whipped into action at the sound of his name connected with something that involved eating. “I’m sure he’d be happy to,” David answered. “But no. You have any idea how much a vet bill would be for sewing all his legs back on?” He thought for a minute. “How about mailing it back? We could print out a label and wear rubber gloves. No handwriting to analyze, no fingerprints.”

  “Genius.” Zachary leaned back, propping his elbows on the step above where he was sitting. “You know, in the pages I read—”

  “The pages with writing on them,” David said.

  “I didn’t read it all!” Zachary protested. “But I saw some stuff that made it sound like her boyfriend is kind of a jerk.”

  “You didn’t need to read any of it to know that.” David’s fingers were starting to cramp, but when he stopped scratching Diogee, the dog gave him such a beseeching look that David started up again. “Everyone in the neighborhood has heard her reaming him out on the phone. Although maybe it’s a combination of him being a jerk and Addison having unreasonable expectations.”

  “I don’t think it’s that unreasonable to expect him to acknowledge her in front of her friends, show up when he says he’ll meet her, or remember her birthday. Even I remember her birthday,” Zachary said.

  He has a crush on her, David realized. He’d suspected the red-golf-ball-looking-mark-on-the-face incident had to do with a girl, but never in a billion years would he have thought that girl was Addison Brewer. Not that Addison wasn’t pretty. But as Zachary himself said, she acted like a shrew. At least she had over the last year or so. But maybe it was because her boyfriend was making her crazy.

  He looked at Zachary. Did Zachary realize he had a crush on her yet?

  “Do I put a note with the diary or anything?” Zachary asked. He straightened up. “I just realized—don’t you think it’ll freak her out to get it the mail when her address wasn’t even in it? She might think she has a stalker.”

  “Okay, I’ve got it,” David said. “Ruby has been working on some kind of dream barn for Riley’s toy pony. I’ll give the diary to Ruby, and the next time she goes over there, she can just stick it under the sofa or something. That way Addison will never know anyone saw it.”

  “Genius.” Zachary leaned back again. “Thanks.”

  “Not a problem,” David said. “Feel like walking Diogee with me?” At the word “walk” Diogee bolted through the dog door, which was perfectly round to match his perfectly round Hobbit house front door.

  “Yeah.”

  As Diogee barreled back through the dog door with his leash in his mouth, David’s phone vibrated. He checked it. Adam. He knew his friend wouldn’t give up until he let him know how it had gone with Sabrina.

  “I have to answer this,” David told Zachary. “You and Diogee go ahead and go. I’ll catch up with you.”

  Zachary nodded. He took the leash from Diogee and snapped it on his collar, then Diogee dragged him across the lawn. David noted that Diogee didn’t let Zachary go out the gate first.

  David answered the phone. He didn’t bother with a “hello.” “She was pregnant. And she had a boyfriend,” he announced.

  “You can’t let this stop you,” Adam said when he stopped laughing. David heard Lucy’s voice in the background, and then he heard Adam relaying what David had told him. “Lucy says that she wants to pick the next woman because you and I clearly suck at it.”

  “I need a little recovery time,” David said. “I feel like I just stepped out of a soap opera.”

  “Screw that,” Adam answered. “A little time would turn into a year. Lucy’s going to go through the profiles. She’ll find you someone good.” He hung up before David could tell him no.

  CHAPTER 8

  Jamie stretched out on her belly so she could get a picture of Ruby and Riley looking at Paula’s dream barn. Ruby had decided it needed to have one side open, like a dollhouse. Their expressions were so similar—excitement mixed with deep concentration as they discussed what should be in Paula’s stall. Should she have a bed, or the softest hay of shining gold, or maybe something made of pink clouds?

  “How about this?” Ruby asked. “A canopy bed, but with the gold hay on top of the mattress part.”

  “And a pink cloud pillow!” Riley clapped her hands, then made Paula clap her front hooves.

  Ruby grabbed her duffel bag off of Riley’s bed and pulled it down next to them on the floor. “I brought some different kinds of material. Let’s see what we can find for the canopy.”

  Smiling, Jamie took more pictures of the two of them examining a filmy flowered scarf. Purple on pink, of course. This is probably how Ruby is with directors, she thought. Listening to their vision and finding the best possible way to make it reality. She definitely had found her passion and was using it to make a living. And to make a little girl insanely happy.

  The door to Riley’s room banged open, and Jamie, Ruby, and Riley all jerked their heads toward the sound. Addison, Riley’s big sister, stood there, holding her diary. Jamie knew it was her diary, because on
their way over, Ruby had confided that a neighbor boy had found it on his porch and Ruby was sneaking it back into the house so Addison wouldn’t realize anyone else had seen it.

  “Riley, you said you hadn’t touched this.” Addison waved the diary at her sister.

  “I didn’t,” Riley whined.

  “Then how did it get in the corner behind the chair, along with your Princess Sofia coloring book and your fairy wand?” Addison demanded.

  “I didn’t,” Riley repeated.

  “I’m always finding things in places I don’t remember putting them,” Ruby said quickly. “The other day I found a bag of frozen peas, formerly frozen peas, in my sock drawer. Seriously, my sock drawer.”

  “I find things in weird places, too,” Jamie added. “Maybe you set it on the chair and it just fell off.”

  “I guess,” Addison muttered. “Just don’t touch it, no matter where it is, Riley,” she added, then left.

  “I didn’t.” Riley held the scarf up against her cheek, then ran it over her pony’s back. “Paula likes this one.”

  “Great choice,” Ruby said. “Jamie and I have to go. I have to help her get ready for a big date.”

  “It’s not really a date,” Jamie said to Riley, then felt silly for feeling the need to clarify that to a four-year-old.

  “I say, keep an open mind,” Ruby told Jamie. She picked up her duffel, then ruffled Riley’s hair and gave Paula a pat. “I’ll get to work on the canopy. If it’s okay with your mom, you can come over tomorrow and pick out what you want for clouds and hay.”

  “It’ll be fine. I’ll bring her over after school,” Addison called from the living room. “She just needs to be back by seven. That’s when Mom gets home and she insists we eat dinner together on the nights she gets home in time.” The girl actually sounded cheerful. It had to be hard being responsible for a little sister, even one as adorable as Riley, so much of the time. The addition of Ruby to the mix was perfect for all three of them. Addison got some free time. Riley got some attention. And Ruby got to enjoy the company of a kid. Jamie remembered the wistful tone Ruby’d had when she’d talked about losing the chance to have children.

  “We have a plan, then,” Ruby said. “Bye-bye, cutie.”

  “’Bye. Thanks for letting me visit,” Jamie added.

  “’Bye,” Riley answered, staring into the dream barn as if she was already imagining the canopy bed inside.

  Jamie and Ruby had just left the house when they heard a scream. They rushed back inside. “What’s wrong? What happened?” Ruby cried, looking from Addison to Riley.

  Addison threw her cell onto the floor. “What happened is that my boyfriend is an—” She glanced at her little sister. “He’s not very nice, okay? He just sent me a picture of him at McDonald’s with his buddies, and this girl who works there, Olivia, she goes to our school, she’s practically sitting on his lap. And he’s loving it. He sent it out to a bunch of people. I don’t even know if he meant to send it to me. Doesn’t matter. Either way makes him an—Makes him not very nice.”

  “How long have you been going out with him?” Jamie asked, while Ruby went over to Riley and took her back to her room.

  “Two years. Unless you don’t count the times when we were broken up,” Addison answered. “I count them, because we always get back together.”

  “I guess that makes sense,” Jamie said.

  “Just so you know, Riley says the scream scared Paula, but that the pony’s okay,” Ruby said, returning to the living room. “I’ve gotta admit, that scream made my heart stop for a second, Addison. It sounded more like an I’m-being-stabbed scream than a my-boyfriend-is-not-very-nice-scream.”

  Addison picked up her cell. “I’m texting him that breathing in a combination of zit cream and hamburger grease can cause cancer,” she announced.

  “We have to go,” Ruby said. “Remember to bring Riley over after school tomorrow.”

  “Yeah,” Addison said, eyes locked on her phone.

  “I was trying to come up with a way to tell her to stop wasting her time with that guy,” Jamie said once they were back outside. “But everything I thought of sounded too preachy, even though I have actual experience staying with the wrong guy for way too long.”

  “Don’t we all?” Ruby asked as they started for Jamie’s. “I should have figured out my ex and I didn’t want the same things before we got married. Except, now he has kids, so I guess he did want the same things, just not with me.” She gave one hand a flick. “That way lies madness. I’m not thinking about it. I’m going to think about Paula’s barn instead. I think I can whittle some posts for the bed.”

  Jamie understood that there were some things it was better not to dwell on. She didn’t feel like thinking about Mr. Cling-Wrap or Mr. Forgot-to-Mention-I-Was-Married or any of her other relationship mistakes. “Whittle? You are the definition of multitalented,” she said.

  “I whittled some little animals for a movie I worked on. That’s one thing I love about my job. I’m always learning how to do new stuff,” Ruby told her. “I’m addicted to the learning curve.”

  “I want that, too. Teaching the same thing over and over got hard. Thanks again for suggesting the surfing,” she added. “Got any other ideas for me and my search for personal fulfilment. And a living wage?” That was what she wanted to focus on. The future, not the past.

  “I don’t know about the living wage, but I took an improv class once. The Groundlings have some. That’s where Melissa McCarthy got started. Cheri Oteri, Lisa Kudrow, Julia Sweeney, Kristen Wiig, Jennifer Coolidge, too. So many amazing women. And guys. The class was a hoot,” Ruby answered.

  “It sounds somewhat terrifying,” Jamie said.

  “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,” Ruby sang. “Is it okay if I go through your closet?” she asked when they went into Jamie’s place. She was already heading toward the bedroom, Mac trotting along behind her.

  “Sure. There’s not much there in the way of dresses. I’m actually in this stage where most of my clothes don’t feel like me. You ever get like that?” Jamie asked.

  “My closet looks like it belongs to someone with multiple personality disorder. But I like having options.” She opened the doors to Jamie’s closet and began flipping through the hangers. “Ah, the little black dress,” she said. “Nice, but not exactly dinner at the neighbors’.” She continued flipping. “Looks like the only other choice is what looks like funeral wear.”

  “That’s the last time I wore it. My mom’s funeral,” Jamie admitted, reaching out to touch the sleeve of the navy-blue sheath dress.

  “Sorry,” Ruby murmured.

  “It’s okay. Do you think a skirt would satisfy Marie?” Jamie pulled out a beige-and-brown plaid pencil skirt she used to wear to parent-teacher night. “It’s nothing special, but that’s the only other option.”

  “I need to take you shopping,” Ruby said. “We’ll go to The Way We Wore, for starters. Great vintage stuff. But, yes, that skirt will do. With this.” She selected a casual chambray shirt. “Under this.” She pulled out a green-and-white-striped pullover. “And these shoes, which I want.” She grabbed Jamie’s favorite peep-toe ankle boots, a big splurge from a few years ago.

  “Never would have thought of those together,” Jamie said. “You’ve definitely got an artist’s eye. You have any idea who Marie might spring on me tonight? She mentioned a great-nephew. Ever met him?”

  Ruby shook her head. “I don’t envy you, getting tangled up in one of Marie and Helen’s competitions. The one over whose soda bread was better was epic, lasted for more than a year. Nessie, Helen’s sister, got involved in that one. Not that they ever said a word to each other. It all went through Marie.”

  “I’ve heard Marie mention Nessie, but I didn’t know who she was,” Jamie said.

  “Helen’s twin. They grew up in Storybook Court. Their parents got divorced when they were eleven. Dad moved to a house on the other side of the Court. Mom stayed in the one next to th
e Defranciscos. Nessie—Clyemnestra, if you can believe that—went with Dad. Helen stayed with Mom. Helen and Nessie never spoke to each other again.”

  “Sad,” Jamie said.

  “Yeah. Sad. I can’t imagine not talking to my sis. I wish she lived closer. She’s in New Orleans,” Ruby answered.

  “I wish I had a sister. Or a brother. With my mom gone, I have no family. Well, you know, some relatives I exchange Christmas cards with.” Jamie noticed that Mac had gotten into her closet and was staring up at the box of stuff that had been left outside the door. She picked him up, set him on the bed, then quickly shut the closet door so he couldn’t get back in. He gave a little growl of annoyance, but she ignored him. There were times when MacGyver had to be ignored.

  “What about your dad?” Ruby asked.

  “Car accident. When I was about Riley’s age. I honestly can hardly remember him,” Jamie answered.

  “That’s so hard,” Ruby said, giving Jamie’s shoulder a squeeze. Jamie did a subject change. She didn’t want to get all emotional before what was probably going to be a blind date at Al and Marie’s.

  “The frustrating thing is, I tried to stop Marie from setting me up. I said no. I think I actually said, ‘No, no, no. No.’ So maybe this dinner is just a dinner,” Jamie said.

  “Signs point to no,” Ruby told her. “Marie hasn’t ever even mentioned her great-nephew to me, so I’ve got no intel for you. Helen’s godson, I met once. I’ve got nothing there, either. He was on the bland side. Whatever he said, it wasn’t memorable.”

  Mac began to purr loudly, and Jamie saw that he’d curled up on the outfit they’d just picked out. “No need for accessories. I’ve got cat hair.” She gave him a nudge. He jumped off the bed and stalked out of the room in a huff, tail high. “Does Marie try to fix up everyone? Or am I special?”

  “She attempted to matchmake for me years ago, but you’re the first new blood she’s had in a while.”

  “What about Helen? Has Marie ever tried to find someone for her?” Jamie asked.