Everlasting Nora

by Marie Miranda Cruz

  “Let’s go!” I had one leg over the windowsill when Jojo grunted and bumped me from behind. They were all on the floor, with Tiger holding Jojo down while the other thug pried the knife out of Jojo’s hand.

  “Jojo!” My eyes scanned around wildly for a way to help him. There was a small room on my right, lined with shelves full of toilet paper and plastic bottles. There was a broom standing in the corner. I grabbed it and whacked the skinny man’s back over and over. He turned and grabbed the broom from my hands and pushed me away. I backed into the storage room as he came toward me. I reached out and clamped on to the first thing my hand touched. A plastic spray bottle.

  “Come on, throw it at me,” dared the man, grinning with stained, crooked teeth.

  I was going to do just that when the pink liquid sloshing inside the bottle gave me another idea. I aimed straight for his eyes. My fingers pumped the trigger fast and hard. The fluid came out in a fine mist that smelled like the cleaner Aling Lydia used to spray on the windows of the bakery. The man waved off the mist as he stumbled backward but I kept on spraying. He coughed violently and then screamed when the cleaner trickled into his eyes.

  Jojo and Tiger continued grappling on the floor. They were both covered with cuts from the balisong, which Tiger finally knocked out of Jojo’s hand and kicked away. Tiger was trying to reach for the knife, but Jojo kept wrestling him back. He looked surprised by Jojo’s strength. He was, after all, only a thirteen-year-old boy who hauled water from the water pump every day.

  Just as Tiger’s hand came within a millimeter of the balisong, I grabbed it before he could take hold of it. Then something else caught my eye. Papa’s watch was on the floor by the stairs. Tiger must have dropped it during the fight. I scrambled for it. When I had it, I kissed it, slipped it over my hand, and closed the clasp.

  “Nora!”

  Tiger had Jojo in a headlock. Then he pinned Jojo to the floor and punched him over and over in the head.

  With the balisong in one hand, I pointed the spray bottle at Tiger’s face with the other and pumped the trigger a few times. He reeled back and fell against the wall. He shielded his face with one hand and tried to wipe the stinging liquid from his eyes with the other. I continued to pump the trigger until Jojo stood once again, wiping the blood from his nose with the end of his T-shirt.

  Tiger squirmed on the floor and screamed, “My eyes! You blinded me, you little witch! Ahhh!”

  Over his screams came the sound of many feet coming up the stairs. Mang Rudy, Virgil, and a couple of policemen rushed toward us.

  The policemen’s eyes traveled from the two men moaning on the floor, to Jojo’s bloody nose and bruised face, and lastly, to me with a balisong in one hand and a half-empty spray bottle of pink window cleaner in the other.

  Chapter Twenty-seven

  “Did they arrest him?” Mama’s voice was getting stronger each day. The color of her face was warm, her lips had a pink flush to them, and her eyes sparkled.

  “Yes, they did. They’re charging him with kidnapping and something called extortion.”

  “And what about Mr. Santiago?”

  “Mr. Santiago found out that Tiger had been stealing from him as well. The police chief is his friend, so Tiger and his gang will be in jail for a long time.”

  Mama had been in the hospital for five days now. The doctor who treated her said that we got her to the hospital just in time. Her infection had gone into her blood and she would’ve died without the right kind of medicine. She still had some pain, but at least her fever was gone. The only concern now was how her illness had affected her heart. The infection weakened it, so she had to stay for observation. I guessed that meant they wanted to keep an eye on her. The doctor tried to explain this to me so that I could understand. Mama would have to come back to see him in a month to make sure her heart was doing fine.

  Mama lay in a charity ward with ten beds. The room had other patients there, but it was comfortable and the nurses were friendly.

  The first two days at the hospital were the hardest. The doctors cleaned Mama’s wound and stuck a tube into her arm that connected to a plastic bag of liquid that contained medicine for the infection and something like vitamins. The nurses tried to make me leave with Lola Mercy and Mang Rudy, saying it was no place for a child, but I refused to let go of my mother’s hand. They finally let me stay and even brought out a small cot for me to sleep on. Mama had slept most of the last five days, but today, she was able to sit up. She even looked younger because her cheeks were a little puffy. According to the doctor, it was because of the liquid that was slowly dripping into her veins from the bag suspended over her head.

  Mama reached out for my hand, squeezed it, and turned it over to look at the blue-and-silver face of Papa’s watch. “It was nice of Mang Rudy to fix the band so you could wear it. Are you going to tell me what happened?”

  Yesterday she had asked me about it, but Aling Lydia had come to visit and stayed so long and had so much to say that she wore Mama out. I wasn’t looking forward to telling her what had happened with Tiger, but she deserved to know.

  “Well, I guess I should start at the beginning.” The story of how Tiger took the watch the day after she disappeared, and everything that had happened afterward, came out in bits and pieces. It was as if my soul did not want to share the longing, pain, and loneliness of those moments when she had gone missing. But I did share it. Even the scary parts. And together we cried over it all.

  “I have failed you, Nora. Over and over again. If it weren’t for me, your father would still be alive.” Mama pressed her hand to her mouth, holding back a wail that curled her body into a ball. She shook, tears pouring from her eyes, filling creases and folds until they streamed over her hands.

  My own eyes, already puffy from crying, began tearing up again. “Don’t say that, Mama, please.” I twisted away from her, wiping my eyes.

  “It’s true. I have to say this.” She took my hands in hers, forcing me to face her. Mama bent her head and pressed her lips to my fingers. She stayed like that for a long time and when she finally looked up, her face was calm, her eyes steely with determination. “Did you ever wonder why Papa went back into the house to find me when I was already outside?”

  I blinked, my breath caught in my throat. “No. I thought you got out while Papa came to get me, and he didn’t know that you had escaped.”

  A heavy pressure began in the middle of my chest. It felt like someone was pressing a finger against it, harder and harder. I didn’t know if I wanted to hear what Mama had to say. One thing seemed clear, though. Mama needed to speak the truth.

  “Your father and I had an argument. I wanted to play mahjong with my friend at a wake. I thought, since it was a Friday, and your father didn’t have work the next day, it would be okay to go.” Mama closed her eyes, her lip trembling. “He didn’t want me to leave. He said I’d been playing too much. I went to the kitchen, pretending to clean up. You were already asleep and after half an hour, I heard your father snoring. That was when I snuck out.”

  I stared, her blurred image coming into focus again when I blinked away my tears. She was crying too, her eyes wide and confused, staring into the past.

  “I heard the sirens. People were running. I wasn’t too far away; the funeral home was only a few blocks down the street. I saw the smoke and the glow of orange against the black sky. I ran. There was already a crowd of people around our apartment building. The flames were too big and other houses had begun to catch fire. I saw your father run into our unit, calling my name…”

  “Oh, Mama.” I didn’t know what to think or say.

  Mama sighed. “Gambling became my comfort. I knew I was getting out of control, but I’d tell myself that it was all going to work out and that I was doing it all to get us out of the cemetery, to go home to Davao—gambling is an addiction. I can see that now.”

  I pulled her hands to my chest. “I will help you, Mama!”

  “Oh, anak, you’ve done so much
. I lost almost all our washing jobs, but you held on to the one we had with Aling Lydia. You sold garlands to keep us fed when all I could think about was winning my next game of mahjong.” She pulled me into her arms. “I let you down. I let Papa down. I made a promise to take care of you. I’ve made so many bad choices. Can you possibly forgive me?”

  Sobs crowded my throat and prevented any words from escaping. I wanted to tell her that, yes, I forgave her. And more than that, I wanted to ask her for forgiveness.

  “I’m sorry too, Mama.”

  “For what, anak?”

  “I’m not sure. I guess for not trusting you more. I thought you left me.”

  “What? Oh, I would never leave you.” She squeezed me tight and kissed the tears from my face. “Things will be different from now on. Aling Lydia offered to give me my washing job back, but since I can’t lift anything for a while, she offered me a job in the bakery instead. She will teach me how to make pandesal. In fact, she wants both of us to work there. I will work in the kitchen and you can work behind the counter. We’ll save money, and I promise, no more mahjong!”

  Mama was going to work in the bakery? What would Perla think of that? I was going to joke around with Mama and ask her if Aling Lydia would let her take home some bread, when a familiar voice echoed through the big room.

  “Lorna? Which bed would she be in? Ay! I’m sorry! I’m looking for my friend.”

  Mama’s eyes brightened. “Rosie! I’m over here!”

  Rosie saw us just as I jumped off Mama’s bed. She looked a little shy walking through the ward, carrying a plastic bag filled with small green fruit.

  “Kumusta? I brought you some guavas. I know they’re your favorite.”

  “Salamat. This is my daughter, Nora. Oh, that’s right, you two have already met. How did you know I was in the hospital?”

  “Oh, well, I ran into Nora’s friend, Jojo. He told me you were here. My uncle is in the hospital as well.”

  Rosie couldn’t stay for very long and promised to visit Mama again before she was discharged from the hospital. Her visit reminded me of something.

  “Why did you decide to use Rosie’s address when you wrote to Tito Danny?”

  Her brow wrinkled. She smoothed the bedsheet over her thighs and sighed.

  “You do remember that I was writing to him because I sold my cell phone? Well, at first, the return address I used was Lola Fely’s. I would go to her house and ask if I had any mail. She told me each time I came by that I didn’t have any. Dina told me later on that he did write to us, only Lola Fely hid the letters.”

  “What? Why would she want to hide them from us?” It was a shocking thing to acknowledge, even though it was something I’d suspected from the start.

  “Who knows? That woman did everything she could to make our lives miserable. She never had an ounce of compassion for us, especially since she believed that my marriage to your father was the cause of her brother’s— your grandfather’s—death.” Mama rubbed her temples as if thoughts of Lola Fely pained her.

  “So how did you figure it all out?” So there was more to the story than she had let on before.

  “Rosie encouraged me to write to Tito Danny again. She let me use her house for the return address. It’s a good thing she did or he wouldn’t have been able to contact us. Dina told me that my brother called Lola Fely once to ask about us, but she refused to come to the phone.” She rubbed my hands as she spoke. It felt good to be consoled, though for some reason I couldn’t explain, I didn’t feel disappointed. There was a time when this news would’ve blasted all my hopes of escaping the cemetery. It seemed like a long time ago.

  Mama went on. “Well, as you can imagine, I was so angry with Lola Fely that I wanted to storm over to her house and tell her exactly what I thought of her, her money and family. But instead, I tried to ask her for a loan. When she refused, I did tell her what I thought of her. We don’t need her, Nora.”

  “We don’t. But you went to see Tiger.”

  She squeezed my hand and turned her face away. The tears were already spilling over onto her cheeks. “Yes. Rosie told me about him, how she met him and how he harassed her. I think he was a little in love with her. Anyway, her uncle had borrowed money from Mr. Santiago before. Rosie asked Tiger to set up an appointment for me to see him.”

  “So this is Rosie’s fault!”

  “No, Nora. I owed money to a few of my friends. I couldn’t go back to Lola Fely after I found out she hid Tito Danny’s letters from me. She couldn’t be trusted anyway after swindling me out of Papa’s savings. I told Rosie that I was desperate. That was how I met Tiger and Mr. Santiago.” Mama closed her eyes and sighed, the sound catching a little in her throat. “I knew how much you wanted to leave the cemetery, to live in a real home again. I must confess that the thought of going back to Davao, having a new home, a chance for you to go back to school, made me so excited. I didn’t consider what would happen if I couldn’t pay Mr. Santiago back.” A tear trickled down her cheek and landed on my hand.

  “I know, Mama.” The reasons why she did what she did didn’t really matter to me anymore. I was just glad she was alive. “I was ashamed, Mama, I can see that now. I don’t feel that way anymore. We will do the best we can with what we have. I’ll take the job at the bakery and sell garlands. We’ll be all right as long as we’re together. Besides, I’m not sure I want to leave Manila anymore. In a way, Lola and Jojo have become our family. He’s been like a brother to me. And you know what? I’m teaching him how to read. He knows some basics but I’ll have lots to teach him. Also, if we move to Davao, we’d be far from Papa.”

  “But anak, we can’t possibly find another home here. I want you to go back to school.”

  Me too. More than anything. My thoughts drifted back to the book and the scholarship papers Kuya Efren had given to me.

  I told her about the forms and that Kuya Efren had written a recommendation letter for me. This made Mama’s eyes fill with tears again. I promised to show her the papers as soon as she got home.

  “The doctor says they will release you tomorrow, Mama. I’ll be going home in a little while to get things ready and to bring back some clothes for you to wear.”

  Mama smiled wistfully, happy to get back to a normal routine. Then she frowned again, the worry-crease between her brows deepening. “Will you be coming back tonight?”

  “No, I’ll be back tomorrow with your clothes. I have to wash our things and sweep out the grave house. But don’t worry, I won’t spend the night at home by myself. I’ll stay with Lola, and Jojo will sleep at our place.”

  “Hey, I heard someone say my name!” Jojo peeked around the divider at us. It was him, but it wasn’t him. For one thing, his hair was combed, held down with so much pomade it made his hair look like a helmet. He was wearing blue jeans, an old sports shirt, and a clean pair of sneakers.

  The shock at his appearance must’ve been so clear on my face that he looked embarrassed. He stood there looking at Mama, then at me, scratching the back of his head so hard, he made the hair behind his head stick up like a rooster’s tail.

  “Where are you going? I’ve never seen you so clean before.” A small bubble of laughter popped out of my chest. I put a hand over my mouth to stop it. I didn’t want to embarrass him more.

  “And with real clothes on? Yeah, I know, I look a little weird. But I’m going to a job interview and Mang Rudy said that I should at least wear pants and comb my hair.” He smoothed back the rooster tail on top of his head and smiled.

  “Really? What’s the interview for?” This was really good news. Anything was better than hauling water. Almost anything. People did desperate things to survive, which I remembered only too well.

  “Here. The nurse told me they needed someone to do things like sweep the floors and empty trash cans. She thinks I’m sixteen years old.” He chuckled and then glanced at the clock on the wall nearby. “Oh, I’m going to be late! Tita Lorna, sorry to leave so quickly. I’ll be back for N
ora as soon as I’m done.”

  Jojo’s voice echoed as he left the room, causing a grumpy patient to shush him and mutter a complaint. Mama and I looked at each other and smiled. Then we giggled until Mama held her side. “What a great young man Jojo will be. Now, aren’t you glad he’s your friend?”

  “Yes, Mama.” I rested my head in her lap while she stroked my hair. I closed my eyes, listening to her breathing, the soft murmur of other voices in the ward, and the rustle of sheets when Mama shifted her feet. It felt so good to lie there, I nearly drifted off to sleep. Then Mama tapped me lightly on the cheek. I opened my eyes.

  “Do you think Jojo will come back after his interview?” asked Mama.

  I sat up and stretched. “I hope he does. He’s supposed to accompany me home.”

  “You know, I had a good feeling about Jojo since I met him that first day we moved to the cemetery. He was so eager to help us, even when you did your best to snub him. I’m so thankful for his lola’s friendship as well. He looked smart all dressed up like that, didn’t he?”

  I smiled, hoping with all my heart that he would get the job. He was a true friend, my very best friend.

  “Yeah, I guess so.”

  Jojo came up behind me. “Who’s smart?”

  I jumped. I spun around and glared at him. “Jojo! It’s very rude to eavesdrop.”

  Mama giggled behind me. With supreme effort, I tried to keep a straight face. “I thought you went to your interview!”

  “I did. The head of housekeeping was just down the hall. We talked a little and she told me I could start tomorrow! Hey, I don’t want to rush you, but we should get going before it gets dark.” He waved to Mama and went out into the hall to wait for me.

  “I’m so happy for him, Mama. It seems like things are looking better for everyone.” Mama simply nodded and smiled gently. She looked tired now, so I kissed her goodnight and left.