A Path Toward Love

by Cara Lynn James

  She nodded. “I do listen, Aunt Letty.”

  She cocked her head. “And what does He tell you about Randy?”

  Katherine paused, taken aback by her great-aunt’s direct question. “Actually, He tells me absolutely nothing.”

  “Just as I thought. But I imagine He does say something about Andrew.”

  A flash of heat rushed to Katherine’s cheeks. Squirming in the hard, ladder-back chair, she struggled for an answer. “The only message I can discern is to follow my heart. And Andrew is my heart. But of course, that’s really out of the question.”

  Aunt Letty shook her head, “Oh no, my dear, it’s really not. But you must have courage to claim the man God has for you. It won’t be as easy as settling for someone else’s choice, but much more satisfying in the long run.”

  Katherine rose. “Be that as it may, I’m not sure I have the strength to see it through.”

  Was it wrong to accept society’s values when everyone except Aunt Letty and Andrew encouraged her to do so? She’d have to decide once and for all, although right now she felt drained from too many conflicting emotions.

  Letty finished her pie and pushed aside the plate. She rose and took Katherine’s arm. “You’ll find your way, dear,” she said, patting Katherine. “I have every confidence in you.”

  “I’m glad you do, Auntie,” Katherine said. “I’m afraid you’re the only one left who does.” They moved to the dining hall door, and just before they reached it, Andrew stepped inside.

  “I’m glad I finally found the two of you together. Would you sit a moment with me?” He gestured toward a table.

  “Oh, it’s so late. And we were about to leave, Andrew.” Katherine glanced toward the door, clearly looking for an escape.

  “Not before your aunt and I tell you something.”

  Aunt Letty lifted her chin. “Ah. Yes, indeed. Let’s all sit down. Perhaps you’d enjoy a piece of pie, Andrew.”

  “No thank you. I’m not hungry.”

  He dropped into a chair across the table from Aunt Letty and Katherine. Her gaze darted all over the room but never lighted on him. She must feel terribly awkward after his declaration of love. He did too, but he couldn’t postpone this meeting.

  He leaned across the table. “Aunt Letty and I have found two investors—friends, actually—who are very interested in the Osborne Citrus Groves. They’d like to invest some money. They’re not interested in purchasing the groves, just in investing.” He swallowed the dryness in his throat, poured himself a glass of water from the pitcher on the table, and took a long sip. He knew he didn’t sound convincing, and Katherine’s suspicious eyes and tilted head confirmed it.

  “How much do they wish to invest?” she asked.

  “Forty thousand dollars. Your aunt and I think this is a splendid opportunity for you to pay off your debt to the bank and—”

  She stood up and pressed her fingertips against the table. “This sounds awfully coincidental to me.”

  “What makes you say that, Katherine dear?” Aunt Letty’s eyes grew rounder as she looked at her, but then she buried her shame in her teacup.

  Andrew cleared his throat. He should’ve thought longer and harder about a plausible story before he blurted it out. “I can assure you we can get the money together.”

  She shook her head and pulled in the corner of her mouth. “You two are the investors. I’m glad your lives don’t depend upon it, because fibbing is not your forte.”

  Aunt Letty’s shriveled cheeks blushed crimson while she stumbled for words. “Whatever makes you think Andrew and I are involved?”

  “Let’s start with the guilt written all over your faces.”

  Aunt Letty drew out a sigh. “We’re merely trying to give you more options. If you pay off Charles’s loan, then you can return to Florida to your business, with or without your parents’ blessing.”

  “I still agreed to remain here through August in exchange for the harvest loan. And now there’s the matter of the buildings . . .”

  “Pshaw,” Aunt Letty said. “As I said, your parents won’t be pleased, but what could they do? They would not call your loans.

  They wouldn’t leave you destitute, homeless. Have some gumption, girl! Follow your heart!”

  Katherine shifted her weight and wrung her hands.

  Andrew stood up too. “Look, we can’t let you toss away your future, Katherine, not when we can help prevent it.”

  “I’m grateful, and I thank you both from the bottom of my heart. But I can’t take a penny from either one of you. Aunt Letty, you need all your money. And, Andrew, if you loaned me the funds, you’d be turning over all you’ve saved for the last few years.”

  “But we want to help,” Andrew insisted.

  Katherine shook her head vehemently. “I can’t have you two paying off Charles’s loan for the same reason I didn’t ask Papa to help me. I married Charles, and his debts are my responsibility, no one else’s.”

  Aunt Letty slowly rose. “Katherine, I admire your strength and determination. But you’ll be forced to sell your company if you don’t pay in full within a few short days. You must allow us to assist you and right away. You can’t afford to dither or wring your hands. Or let your pride stand in your way.”

  Katherine’s shoulders sagged. “I know I don’t have many choices.”

  Aunt Letty planted her hands on her ample hips, gaining steam. “You’ll lose your business and then you’ll have to live with your parents until they make life so uncomfortable you’ll find marriage to just about anyone an improvement. Do you think your mother will let you remain at home as a widow? Certainly not. Even if you turn Randy down, she’ll throw another young man she deems suitable at you. Is that what you want?”

  “No, of course not. But I won’t have you two sacrificing your money for me.”

  “We want to,” Andrew said softly. Clearly she wasn’t going to accept their offer. At least not tonight.

  The door swung open, and Mr. Wainwright and Mr. Clarke stepped through the entranceway.

  Mr. Wainwright’s eyes widened in shock and then displeasure, seeing the three of them together. Andrew subtly winced.

  “Andrew, ladies,” he said with a genteel nod.

  “Mr. Wainwright,” Andrew returned, refusing to back down with his gaze. If he loved Katherine, if he wanted to fight for her, he had to be able to face his boss. But he knew that his fate was now sealed. Even with Aunt Letty present, he’d gone against Mr. Wainwright’s wishes and sought out his daughter.

  And that won’t settle well with him.

  “Andrew, you’re up late,” Mr. Wainwright said, frowning. “Better turn in or sunrise will come earlier than you’d like.”

  “Agreed, sir,” he said.

  “Thank you for joining us, Andrew,” Letty said. “I’m sorry we intruded upon the solace of your evening.” She gave him a small smile that only he could see. The old girl’s a conspirator in more ways than one, God bless her . . .

  “Oh, no, Mrs. Benham. It wasn’t an intrusion at all. Good evening.”

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Randy sat on the end of the dock, dangling his legs in the quiet water. His line didn’t move. The sunshine brought out blue-black highlights in his hair. When he saw Katherine, he grinned. “Come join me. The water is warm. Relatively.”

  She’d changed into a pretty new lace dress made in featherweight, finely woven lawn that Mama had given her. High at the neck, it boasted ruffles and ribbons on the bodice. Her hair, secured with silver combs, was loosely piled upon her head and tendrils curled at the sides of her face. She raised a matching white parasol to shade her from the noon sunlight.

  “My, you look stunning today—not that you don’t every day. New dress?” His slanted eyes glinted with admiration.

  “Yes, it is.”

  He viewed her with an appreciative gaze. “Much improved over all those prairie frocks you wore when you first came here.”

  Katherine blushed. “I didn’t r
ealize you noticed such things.” He at least ought to keep his disparaging opinions to himself.

  Since she couldn’t very well sit on the rough dock in her lovely dress, she continued to stand. Reluctantly, it seemed, Randy rose, dried off his feet, and brushed off his rolled-up trousers. “Shall we sit on the bench by the boathouse?” he asked.

  They strolled back to the wooden bench, partially shaded by overhanging tree branches. They took their seats close together, but she kept several inches between them. A mild breeze blew in from the lake and stirred the small birch leaves overhead. A few birds sang; a seagull dove into the water for a fish. They watched canoeists paddle by and a steam yacht pass in the distance.

  Randy touched Katherine’s hand lightly. “Have you thought any more about us?” He asked in an offhanded manner, but he sounded unusually tense as well.

  “I have. I’ve given it a great deal of thought. Courting is too important to jump into headlong without praying about it first.” And weighing all advantages and disadvantages carefully.

  “Praying? You actually pray about courtship?” He pulled on his mustache and frowned. “I’ve never heard of such a thing, but I suppose it’s a good idea,” he murmured.

  “Yes, I’ve come to decide I should pray about all the important decisions in my life.”

  “And the Lord told you I should be your suitor. I’m right, aren’t I?”

  Not exactly. His light tone mocked her a bit, but she ignored it. She looked deep into his dark eyes. Instead of seeing hope and affection, she found anxiety, maybe even fear. Katherine paused. Such undercurrents didn’t mesh with Randy’s normal lackadaisical personality. Was his love for her so strong he couldn’t abide a rejection? That idea was laughable. He cared for her, but not in any deep, selfless way.

  “Well, Katherine, you’ve kept me in suspense for weeks. It’s high time you answer. May I court you?” The edge in his voice gave her pause. Why did her answer make him so tense?

  She tried to add a dash of levity by smiling, but she could barely curve her lips. “Yes, you may.” Horrified at the flat tone in her own voice, she broadened her grin. Her acceptance relaxed her own tight muscles, but unfortunately, not a bit of peace or joy flowed to her heart.

  His frown vanished, but his emerging smile seemed almost grim. “Splendid. I’m sure we’ll make an excellent couple. We’ll be quite happy, I’m sure.”

  “Yes, of course we shall.” Hadn’t their mothers reminded them of their suitability often enough? But why didn’t he say he loved her? Maybe the thought never occurred to him. Of course she didn’t love him deeply either, so she shouldn’t expect more from him. Only she did. She wanted so much more than friendship.

  She yearned for love, just not the passionate, reckless kind she once felt for Charles. She wanted the sort of love that would sustain her over a lifetime. But who actually experienced such lasting joy? Aunt Letty and Uncle Norman perhaps, though they were exceptional. And maybe Mama and Papa. Who was she trying to deceive? Herself? The overwhelming feelings pushing her toward Andrew were definitely more than tame affection. They were passionate, with a force she’d never encountered before.

  But this is right, she told herself. This is what I must do. For the sake of us all . . .

  Randy leaned over and planted an unexpected kiss on Katherine’s cheek and then brushed his mouth against hers. Cold and disagreeably moist, she shuddered at the feel of his lips. Gently, she moved her head away and rose.

  Instinctively she knew they both felt disappointed. She’d hoped kissing him, when it happened, would kindle a fire inside her, a love she didn’t expect. Even a spark would encourage her to hope that, in time, their lifelong affection would blossom into real love. But instead, nothing happened. Nor, she admitted to herself, would it ever.

  Randy was still only her childhood friend. Was taking this step toward an engagement, and ultimately marriage, another disastrous mistake she’d learn to regret? But wasn’t it worth sacrificing for Andrew? He’d marry her without considering all he’d lose in the bargain. She couldn’t let that happen. He was much too dear to her.

  Randy pressed her hand. “Shall we go inside and tell our families?”

  “In a few moments. I have something I should tell you. It’s a bit difficult, I’m afraid.”

  “Tell me about it, Katherine,” he urged.

  She wondered if it might be a mistake to share the secret about Harriet and Charles, but even as a suitor, he ought to know about the aspects of her marriage that still affected her life. “All right, but please don’t repeat any of this because it’s very personal.” She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “While Charles and I were married, he had a love affair with a woman named Harriet. They had a son. I’ve heard from her recently because now she and her child are short of funds. Harriet wants me to help support the boy.”

  Tugging at the corner of his bristly mustache, Randy leaned back. “You don’t say. I’d never have thought. My goodness, Katherine, are you sure you’re right?”

  She nodded. “I’m not mistaken. Anyway, I’m waiting to hear from her.”

  “You mean you’re writing to the woman? You ought to ignore her demands. She has an unbelievable nerve asking you for money after what she did. She’s getting exactly what she deserves—poverty for her sin.”

  Surprised to hear Randy speak of sin, she wasn’t shocked that he advised her to ignore the woman’s plea. “It’s the boy I feel sorry for, not the mother.” Maybe she should feel some compassion for Harriet, but she couldn’t. Fulfilling her Christian duty was the most she could manage.

  Randy sounded exasperated. “Yes, of course you feel sympathy for their plight, but he’s not your responsibility. There are charities to take care of the poor and indigent. You needn’t worry. Once you give her even a small amount, she’ll come back and demand more. She’ll drain you dry in no time.”

  “Maybe you’re right, but I’d like to give her something to tide her over until she gets a job.”

  Randy touched her hand. “You’re so generous and kind. Too kind, I’m afraid.” His dark eyes narrowed to slits. “What do your parents suggest you do?”

  She gulped. “Actually, I haven’t spoken to them. I thought I’d handle this myself.”

  “Hmm.” He frowned and squeezed her hands with too much pressure. “You should reconsider. They both have good sense. They wouldn’t lead you astray.”

  They’d insist Papa handle the situation. He’d subtly pressure Harriet to give up her claim, or maybe he’d buy her off with a few dollars. Either way, she’d never meet the woman and her son. But for some perverse reason, she wondered if meeting them would finally end the ugly chapter of her life. Still, the idea of meeting Harriet in person was more than she wanted to face. Fortunately she didn’t have to. Andrew promised to take care of it for her.

  “Well, of course I’ll think about telling Mama and Papa. But I have to consider how this news will upset them. I’ll have to wait for the right time.” Regret slithered through her. She should’ve solved this on her own without breathing a word to Randy.

  “Shall we go tell our families the good news?” he asked. “They’ll want to know we’re courting.”

  She forced a smile. “By all means.”

  Taking her hand, they strolled back to the chalet without saying a word.

  That evening at dinner the Wainwrights let it be known that Randy was courting Katherine and intimated that an engagement was in the offing. The merriment grew boisterous. From the smiles of approval all around, nobody seemed to question it.

  But Andrew wanted to slip away from the celebration. He was tired of grinning and pretending good wishes to a couple with little real interest in each other—at least not the kind that sustained a lifetime together. Yet he knew he was already on tenuous ground with his boss. Mr. Wainwright would not look kindly upon any action that diminished this moment.

  Both Katherine and Randy held stiff smiles throughout the meal. Andrew lost his appetite for t
he delicious beef Wellington, and he couldn’t finish the custard tart they served for dessert, though any other time he would dig right in. When the ladies departed for the lodge, the men lingered for cigars and brandy. He didn’t smoke, and the thick smell swirling toward the beamed ceiling threatened to choke him, but he stayed at the table and made an occasional comment about business matters, which normally held his attention. Tonight they seemed trivial and irritating.

  As soon as the group rejoined the ladies for a few hours of entertainment, Andrew was finally able to plead a headache and excuse himself. He threaded his way through the lounge and before climbing the stairs noticed a group had gathered around Katherine and Randy at the piano. They sang with good spirit while she tapped out one popular song after another. No one seemed to take any notice of him as he climbed the stairs to the second floor.

  Two hours later he gave up reading and tossed his book onto his bed. He hastened down the back staircase and outside into the dark night. A cool breeze blew from the lake and whistled lightly in his ears as he started across the darkened yard. He took care not to trip over branches and old pinecones that intermingled with clumps of grass.

  Moonlight cast a silvery net over the water. Stars flickered like candle flames across the black sky before wispy clouds blocked them from view. The music drifting through the screened windows of the lounge faded as he drew closer to the bridge leading to the gazebo.

  For a long time he sat on a bench and watched the inky waters wash toward shore, gurgling as they lapped over the gritty sand. At the sound of footsteps, Andrew turned his head. Gliding across the yard was a slender figure in white.

  Katherine.

  Heart pounding, he cleared away his gloomy thoughts and rose. A few seconds later she was at his side. Shivering, she wrapped her shawl tightly around her shoulders and chest.