Mismatched Pair

by J. L. Ray

  “Show up?”

  “Bergfrid, where do you think you are?”

  “I do not know! I only know that Sebastian is nearby.”

  Tony ran a weary hand through her hair and blew out a sigh. “Where to begin? Okay. You are in Mudania, not Fairie.”

  Bergfrid just stared.

  “You didn’t know that?”

  “How do I know that now?” Bergfrid looked at Tony suspiciously. “I have only your word that this is true.” The insult in her voice rolled right off of Tony.

  “You are one tough cookie,” Tony said as she got up and walked to the large bank of windows on one wall of the room. “Look out there and tell me what you see?”

  Bergfrid walked over to the window and looked out onto Constitution Avenue, where cars, taxis and buses all vied for room on the road. The Washington Mall sat just a few blocks from the SCIB. The view from the window included the Washington Monument, standing out against the skyline above several of the other nearby buildings, as well as the two newest museums, the African-American Museum of History and the Supernatural History Museum, the latter sparkling in the sun just a bit, as if covered in glitter. Bergfrid narrowed her eyes and stared at the buildings.

  “This does not look like Fairie, but in Fairie one cannot trust one’s senses in every case. Magic can be used to fool the eye.” Bergfrid turned to Tony and folded her arms, her posture challenging. “Those buildings are impressive, but are they even real?”

  Tony sighed again. “Gonna do everything the hard way, are we? Okey-dokey.” She walked over to the windows, which, uncharacteristically for a modern building, could actually be opened. This anomaly in architecture had more to do with the needs of Supers than the common sense that said being able to open windows in a building is a good thing. Supers hated air conditioning, hated it big-time. Most of them needed a connection to nature, not that downtown D.C provided much in the way of nature. Tony opened one of the windows and a flood of traffic noise came pouring in. They actually had a spell that could block the traffic noise, but she didn’t activate it.

  Bergfrid’s nostrils flared as she took in the sounds and smells of the city, the majority of the smells coming from the older cars still using fossil fuels. Most fossil fuel burning vehicles had been phased out when pixie dust became a way to run electronics. Given that many societal issues in Mundania stemmed from early Fairie activity in primitive Natty societies, The Powers That Be didn’t like to interfere. However, the use of pixie dust as a power source was the one concession they’d made. Despite the change for the better, some folks still stubbornly wanted to operate their gas-burners, so until those all broke down, a few still chugged down the roadways, pumping more carbon dioxide into the atmosphere.

  “Well, Berg,” Tony asked. “What do you say? Is it real enough, or do we need to go down to the street, find a vendor serving fish tacos, and introduce you to yuppie Mexican food?”

  Bergfrid turned back to Tony, a look of wonder lighting up her face and making Tony understand how a guy could get so crazy over one woman. She absolutely glowed. Actually, she literally glowed—the light emanating from her tinged with gold.

  “Wow. I’ve never seen anyone do that before,” Tony said.

  “Do what?”

  “You’re glowing.”

  Bergfrid blushed. “It happens when women in my family are in my condition.”

  Tony frowned. “Your condition?”

  Bergfrid nodded and suddenly slid one hand up and down her slightly rounded belly. “I’m not very far along, but I want to make sure that Sebastian and I are wed before the baby is born so that there is no question about inheritance later.”

  Tony’s jaw dropped. She gulped it shut. It dropped again. She shook her head. “I am missing something important here, and sister, I think you are, too.” She pointed at the chairs. “Let’s have a seat for a minute. I need for you to walk me through this.”

  Bergrid frowned. “I am not your sister. And how can I walk you through something if we are sitting?”

  Tony shook her head. “You and Baz are two annoyingly literal peas in pod, aren’t ya?” She saw Bergfrid start to argue again. “Just sit down, please?”

  “Very well,” Bergfrid said as she sat down and started to take a drink from the mug of tea.

  “Stop!”

  “What?” Bergfrid had the tea at her lips.

  “There’s caffeine in that, and you can’t have it.”

  “But you just gave it to me!”

  “Damn! Quit arguing and give me the tea.”

  Bergfrid set it down hard, splashing some out of the mug. “I wanted that tea.”

  Tony stood up and took the mug over to the sink. “I’ll make you some without caffeine, okay? Do you like peaches? Raspberries?”

  “Oh yes, I love both. But is this the season for them?”

  “I have flavored tea.”

  Bergfrid raised and brow and shook her head. “I do not know these things.”

  “It’ll be good. Pregnant women can drink this without harming the infant,” Tony said.

  They both kept quiet as Tony went through the act of making another cup of tea, this time a soothing concoction that lacked caffeine.

  “Here.” She handed it Bergfrid. “Be careful. It’s hot.”

  Bergfrid raised one brow. “Women in Mundania must be rather fragile things.”

  “Sure! Disturbed by the slightest puff of air,” Tony agreed. “Now, I need to hear your story. All of it.” She narrowed her eyes. “Go back to the very beginning.”

  Bergrid stared at Tony’s face, and nodded. “Very well.” She looked back down at the mug and began.

  “When I was a young girl, I was promised to Sebastian as a bride. I thanked my parents for such a wise choice, but inside, my joy knew no bounds. I have known him all my life and loved him as long as I can remember.” She looked down at the tea and starting dunking the tea bag, like Tony was doing. She looked back up. “I knew that he had to go on the kriger seremoni before we could marry, but I never thought twice of it until he told me he would make the trip as quickly as he could, making only the necessary kill, killing whatever animal he first found, in order to get back to me. I knew I had to stop him from doing that.”

  “Uhm. Why?” Tony asked. “Why did it matter what he did on his kriger thingee?

  Bergfrid took a cautious sip of the tea, which had finally cooled a bit. “Kriger seremoni. For another Being, it would not have mattered at all. For another Viking, it might not have mattered. But Sebastian is both Viking and royal. This rite, it means much to my people. If he had come back, successful quickly but with only a minor success, it would have eaten him alive. Eventually, I will grow old and ugly.” She said it as if she couldn’t believe it herself. “When he grew older and looked at me, he wouldn’t see his lover, the mother of his children, his life’s mate. He would see the woman who made him less than he should have been.”

  Tony shook her head. “This is all over how big a kill he brought in for the kriger seremoni? Seriously? Five hundred years of angst over how big a bear?”

  Bergfrid snorted. “How do men prove themselves in your culture?”

  “They support themselves. They get jobs, educations if needed. They become citizens of a democratic society. They treat others the way they want to be treated. They become good neighbors, friends, husbands and fathers. It takes a lot of time. It’s not a one shot deal.”

  Bergfrid twisted her lips, “I don’t think that there is a way that you can understand, then. If Sebastian came home with whatever Mundane animal he could find, a caribou, or a fox, or a r-r-rabbit!” She got so excited she was falling over her words. “He would never get over it. And he would never forgive me.”

  Tony sat for a moment, trying to appreciate a culture so very different. Finally, she said, “I suppose you decided to keep him from ruining his life?”

  Bergfrid nodded. “Of course!”

  “Wow. So. That turned out badly.”

 
“What do you mean?”

  “Bergfrid, is that baby Sebastian’s?”

  Two seconds later, Tony found herself in a stranglehold, a knife against her throat.

  “Don’t insult me and mine, Mundane whore.”

  “Whoa, there.” Tony spoke slowly and put her hands out in front of her to show that she wasn’t going to try to break the hold. She could feel a pinch on her neck where the knife was cutting her, and she was really hoping to keep the neck scars to an absolute minimum. “I didn’t mean to insult anyone. I just need for you to understand. Five hundred years have passed since the last time you saw Sebastian. And he was off on his krigering whatsis for three years before that, according to him.” She paused, picking her words carefully. “I’m just trying to get an idea of how he could have gotten you...uh...how the two of you could have...” She swallowed. “Well, hell. There’s no nice way to ask. When did you have time to get knocked up, uhm, I mean pregnant, and how come the baby is still, uh, gestating? How come you’re still young?”

  Bergfrid let her go and stepped back, wiping the blood from Tony’s neck on her sleeve before re-sheathing the knife. “Magic, of course. Though,” she looked over at Tony who had turned around to face her, “five hundred years? I did not expect that.”

  “Surprises all around for everyone tonight,” Tony said. She pointed at the chair Bergfrid had leapt from to grab her, pleased to see her finger wasn’t shaking at all. Apparently, Bergfrid and Baz were pretty well matched in the whole cra-cra aspect of their personalities. “Could we sit again? Have a little tea? Try for more civility, less knife fighting?”

  Bergfrid snorted again. “Were you fighting, Mundane? I hadn’t noticed.”

  “Nice. Really nice. Look, Berg, if you’re here for a bit, you need to follow the rules, and in Mundania, if you kill a Mundane, the Geas is going to kill you in one week.”

  “Geas? What Geas?” Bergfrid frowned.

  “A lot has happened in the time that has passed since you were uhm…waiting for Baz.” She managed to keep the question mark out of her voice. “Passed for the rest of the Realms, anyway.” Tony shook her head. “Trust me, you’ll want to keep the mayhem to a dull roar. In fact, no mayhem at all is the best bet. In the meantime, I need to know the rest of the story. How did you?” She pointed at Bergfrid’s belly.

  “I told you, magic.” Bergfrid folded her arms.

  “And still not enough information. Magic that...” she trailed off expectantly.

  Bergfrid blushed. “I missed Sebastian while he traveled, so I made a deal with a demon so that I could appear to him in his dreams. I had to cross Realms to show up since he was in Mundania, but the dreams worked. I could talk to him and...touch him. I didn’t realize how very…real,” Bergfrid looked a bit embarrassed, “the dreams were until I discovered that I was pregnant. And Sebastian was still in Mundania, and my parents were going to kill me.” Her voice had gotten tighter as she added the last details.

  Tony had gone still at the part where she mentioned a deal with a demon. “You made a deal with a demon? What demon would that be?”

  “Mephistopheles.”

  Tony knew his name was coming, but it still hit her like punch to the head. “What kind of deal?” Tony was proud of how calm she sounded just then. No cursing. Damn that stupid demon. Well, no cursing out loud. For the moment.

  Bergfrid shook her head. “I cannot say.”

  “Cannot, or will not?”

  Bergfrid glared at her.

  “Okay. So what happened next? Obviously, your parents didn’t kill you.”

  “They don’t know—” Bergfrid stopped, looking stricken. “They’re dead by now, aren’t they?”

  Tony frowned. “I’m not sure what your typical life-span is, Berg. Baz is a Changeling now, and if Changelings manage to keep from getting killed, life spans are quite impressive. His enchantment kept him alive the five hundred years. He’s been in human form now for twenty-five years, and he only looks a little bit older than me, maybe in his thirties at most.”

  “My people can be long-lived, several hundred or so years, if not stricken with disease. But most of us die in battle before we make it past three hundred years.”

  “That’s pretty long-lived to a Natty.”

  “Natty?”

  “A Natural of Mundania as opposed to the Supernaturals of the Fairie Realms.”

  “Ah. Yes. Some of my people moved to Mundania.” She sneered. “I never saw the attraction, myself.”

  Tony managed not to roll her eyes. “So how old are you?”

  “I was twenty years old when I realized I was pregnant. And that is when she showed up.”

  “Who?”

  “The witch.”

  Tony winced. Didn’t that just figure. Baz had mentioned a witch, so this must be the bit where he was made Changeling.

  “Who is she?”

  “Was.”

  “Dead, huh?”

  “Yes, Mephistopheles killed her.”

  “Handy.” Tony ground that one out between her teeth.

  “At times, he proved to be a staunch ally, but only because of the deal.”

  “The deal you cannot explain and would not, even if you could?”

  “Yes.”

  “Fabulous.” Tony tapped her finger on the table. “So the witch, named…?”

  “Brunhilde,” Bergfrid said.

  “It only needed that,” Tony muttered.

  “What?”

  “Nothing. Just thinking of a certain opera. So Brunhilde the Witch showed up. Why?”

  Bergfrid’s chin went out. “I summoned her.”

  “O-kay. A deal with Mephistopheles wasn’t enough for you, huh?” Tony asked drily.

  “Three years, Mundane woman.” She paused, “Natty woman. Three years he’d been gone. My parents were starting to push other suitors my way. They thought I’d be an old maid. They thought he must be dead.”

  “You knew he wasn’t. Didn’t you tell them?”

  Bergfrid sneered. “My people do not make deals with demons. I would have been cast out.”

  “This just gets better all the time. You haven’t read any of those old stories about Patient Griselda, or the one where the wife has to travel East of the Sun and West of the Moon to win back her husband?”

  “The latter was my great grandmother. Have you any idea how much pressure it is to live up to a legend?”

  “Hmmm. Good point.” Tony sighed. “What did you want from Brunhilde?”

  “She had made the Changeling he sought to kill. I found out that the creature had originally been a member of Sebastian’s own family but had been changed as punishment for killing his wife and child. The High King had told Ullr that if he acted like an animal, he would live as one, and he paid Brunhilde to change him. Then he had Ullr sent to Mundania.”

  “Of course, the dumping ground for wicked Supers from every Realm. Fabulous.”

  “I wanted her to help Sebastian finish his kriger seremoni and she pulled me through the Divide to where he was, but instead of helping him, she encouraged Ullr to attack him, and then she Changed Sebastian. In a panic, I called Mephistopheles. He tried to stop her, but she attacked him and he had to kill her. That kept Sebastian stuck in his bear form.” She stopped, surprised to find a tear rolling down her cheek. She wiped it away.

  “What did you and Mephistopheles do?” Tony asked, recognizing the part of the story that Baz had described so angrily.

  “I fainted. When I woke, Mephistopheles was trying to revive me and get me away from my true love, who seemed ready to tear us both apart. I became hysterical, laughing and crying, and Mephistopheles had to restrain me in order to manage our escape.” She sighed. “When we returned, I still had the same problems. My true love stuck in Mundania, only worse now, since he was a Changeling. And I had this life growing in me, a relentless reminder that I had broken our code of conduct...” She rubbed her belly ruefully as she spoke. “I had to do something. Mephistopheles agreed to put me under a sl
eeping spell.”

  Tony lifted a brow. “For how long?”

  Bergfrid looked surprised. “Those types of spells have a standard true love policy built in. Only true love can end that type of spell. Mine would last until my true love called to me. He must have done so. The only wonder is that it took so long!”

  “Yeah, it’s a wonder all right.” Before Bergfrid could ask her what she meant, Tony added, “Why didn’t Phil just tell Baz what he had done?”

  “Is...Is Phil what you call Mephistopheles?” When Tony nodded, she added, “How odd. Well, that’s easy enough to answer. Unfortunately, sleeping spells also include a standard compulsion, so Mephistopheles couldn’t seek out my Sebastian and tell him the truth. In fact, he couldn’t tell anyone the truth.” She thought about what Tony had said. “Do they know each other here in Mundania?”

  “Yeah. They do. Phil is my...hmm. Shit. Well, I’m not sure to what to call him. Let’s say friend.”

  “Mephistopheles is your shit friend?” Bergfrid asked. Her apparent lack of any sense of humor didn’t make it any easier for Tony to resist the joke.

  “Right. Sure. And Baz is my new temporary partner. His partner is out sick.”

  “Partner?”

  “Police tend to work in pairs. It’s safer that way.”

  Bergfrid shook her head, “You Mundanes are obsessed with safety.”

  “We have really short life-spans compared to you, Berg. And, not to be a bitch, but I really think you should avoid criticism, don’t ya think? Given the whole—” she pointed at Bergfrid’s belly and rolled her finger in a circle“—you haven’t worried about safety nearly as much as you needed to vibe that you’ve got goin’ on.”

  Bergfrid took another sip of tea and made a face. “It’s cold now.” She set the mug down and folded her arms on the table. “Sebastian has had to pass five hundred years, no, five hundred and twenty-five years, without knowing where I was.”

  “Yes. You could say that.”

  “What would you say?”

  Tony hemmed. “I’d say he spent five hundred and twenty-five years thinking you did him wrong. And now he’s super-pissed, uhm, really mad.” She knew she shouldn’t be so blunt, but this particular Super just plucked her last nerve. As she finished talking, the look of fury on Bergfrid’s face told her that she’d gone too far.