Break Me

by Amanda Heath

  “What’s up with Uncle Nathan?” Paisley asks, trying to take Rachel’s phone.

  Outrage covers Rachel’s face now. “It’s none of your business. Besides, I don’t know anything. His text just says his dad needs him and he’ll be over later.”

  When my phone starts ringing, I get a sick feeling down my spine. “Titanium” blares out of my phone. That’s Ashley’s ringtone and she never calls. She texts. I don’t reach it in time, so I wait for her to leave me a voicemail. Before she can, it starts ringing again, this time its “Timber”. “Van? What’s going on? Is Aunt Lily okay?”

  “Mom’s fine, Wes.” He doesn’t say anything else and that feeling moves down my spine again.

  “What’s wrong, Van?” Royal has moved off the bed and now stands behind me. He places his hands on my shoulders and starts to rub them when he finds them tense.

  “She broke up with me,” he whispers, and my stomach drops. It’s the one moment in my life that I wish had never happened. I know Pierce is in love with Annabella. I’ve always known she picked the wrong brother. I just never thought she would do this.

  “When?” Three days ago, Pierce and Annabella left on a road trip. They were supposed to be back by now. I didn’t think anything of it. They have been doing it for spring break for the past three years.

  “Three days ago,” he replies, and I can hear the anguish in his voice.

  I’m speechless. Truly, deeply speechless. I don’t know what to tell him. When I invited them over to Royal’s, I didn’t speak to them on the phone. I just texted. Annabella texted back that they would be over later. She lied to me. They both lied to me. They’ve lied to everyone around them. This betrayal hurts more than anything I’ve been through.

  I drop the phone down to my waist and just stare at the wall. They have ruined my family. I told her all those years ago to leave Pierce alone. And she told me she didn’t feel that way about him. I understand you love who you love, but there is a line. You don’t string two brothers along. Because when Van finds out, he’s going to blow up. There is going to be a huge rift in my family now.

  Royal takes the phone out of my hand but I hardly notice. I hear his amazing voice behind me but I can’t make sense of his words. I just stare at the wall. What am I going to do?

  Rachel walks up beside me and pulls me away from the wall. “Ashley’s here.”

  I look over to the doorway and see my beautiful, older cousin and I hurt for her. I cross over but stop halfway when I notice she’s staring wide-eyed at Channing. “You look just like him,” she whispers, dumbstruck.

  Channing has turned pale and Paisley stands beside him, holding his hand. “So do you,” he mumbles, his lips barely moving.

  “Ashley…” I say, trying to break up this awkward situation. She turns her head toward me and the spell is broken. “I was waiting for you to leave me a voice message but Van called. Where are they?”

  Her face goes from shock to rage. My cousin is the sweetest, kindest person I have ever met. That’s why Victor loves her so much. “I have no idea. I was hoping you knew. I had no idea she even broke up with Van. He called and he sounded horrible. I didn’t tell him that Court was with her. I didn’t tell him they left together. I feel so horrible for lying to him.” She leans against the doorway and starts to sob.

  “He knows. Apparently Annabella posted pictures on Facebook.” Royal pauses and swallows, hard. “Apparently they are pretty bad.”

  “What is pretty bad?” Ash asks, but we both look at my boyfriend.

  Royal just shakes his head. “Oh my fucking god!” Rachel exclaims and we all turn toward her. She jumps up and runs over to me, her phone in her hand. She shoves it in my hands and looks up at Royal. “Things are about to get real bad.”

  What I see in those photos fill me with rage and a long-lasting hatred for my best friend. At first they are innocent. Just them at the beach, the Gulf of Mexico, beautiful behind them. Some are in the car, just them goofing off and having fun. Then they get really bad. As in, they are kissing in front of the Gulf of Mexico. There are even a few where they are kissing in a hotel bed.

  “I’m going to be sick,” I mumble, dropping the phone and running to the bathroom. I throw up the pizza Royal and I had for dinner. Someone holds my hair up so I don’t get vomit on me.

  When I finish, I find Royal in the bathroom with me. He holds out a cup of water and I take it. I take a drink and swish the water around. Then I spit it in the toilet. “How could she do that to Donovan? How could she take two and a half years and hurt him like that? It’s not his fault Annabella is a bitch. I knew she was going to do this. I kept praying that she wouldn’t, but this is what she does. She ruins everything. She pushes everything good out of her life.” I slam my head back against the cabinet and grit my teeth. “Pierce is in love with her. Like there is no one else on this planet for Pierce but Annabella. She’s going to destroy him.”

  Someone knocks on the door and I groan. “It’s me,” Ash says, and I tell her to open the door. When she comes in she looks distraught. “I just want to find them.”

  “Annabella said they were coming over here later. Just sit and wait. You know her, you can’t hurry her anywhere,” I say, my voice weak.

  Ash leans on the floor and cups my cheek. “You shouldn’t worry about this, Wes. The moment Annabella chose Van, I knew this was going to happen. I knew she was going to ruin my family. I honestly think that’s what she wants. I have no idea why, but maybe somewhere in her crazy head, she has a reason.”

  “I have to worry. She’s going to destroy Pierce, Ash. I can’t let her do that. I can’t let her hurt my Pierce,” I whisper, tears starting to fall down my face.

  Ash hugs me tight to her chest and we both cry. I think we get this from Aunt Lily, because Ash is always crying, too. “Ash?” Victors booming voice shocks both of us.

  Ash looks a little sheepish when she pulls away. “I totally forgot I left him downstairs with Mrs. Sanders.” Then she turns her head toward the door. “We’re coming out, love.”

  Then with Royal’s help, they get me off the floor. Victor stands right outside the door and his face is pissed. He looks at me and I flinch. “Where is my sister?” Royal feels me tense up and backs me behind him.

  “I have no idea,” I squeak out, popping my head around Royal’s back.

  Victor eyes him up and down. His face doesn’t change but I can tell he approves. Oh what joy, my cousin’s boyfriend approves of my boyfriend. All my dreams have come true. “Vic! Royal is going to punch you in the face if you don’t stop scaring Wesley. You know how she is with you.”

  Victor grunts but moves around the room to stand by Ash. Royal still stands in front of me, while Channing glares at Victor with his hands in fists. Paisley looks pissed off too and I see Rachel took her pepper spray out of her purse. I take a deep breath. “Sorry guys. Victor and I have a…weird past. He isn’t going to hurt me.”

  Everyone seems to stand down. I told Royal about Victor a long time ago. I can still hear him screaming whenever he talks. I just hate that it’s not even his fault I’m scared of him. I meet his eyes and try to smile. I kind of want to cry when I see the hurt. He wants me to love him because Ash is his, and I do. I love Victor, like I love the rest of my family; he’s just hard to be around.

  We all decide to sit around and wait for Pierce and Annabella. I guess since Channing and Ashley haven’t seen each other in a long time, they decided they needed to talk. If only I had known it was that easy. Could have saved a lot of bullshit in my life.

  Paisley and Victor sit beside their loves, but you can tell how happy they are. Finally Channing grows some balls. Paisley and I have been working on him for three months. He hasn’t budged once. If I had known he only needed to see her, I would have planned a secret attack.

  Two hours go by and we try to do things, but we can’t. Our minds are on what lays ahead. Confrontations with Annabella are never fun. That’s why I’m glad Victor is here. He doesn’t
put up with her shit and she knows it.

  My phone rings and it’s Pierce. No one else knows it’s Pierce because I used one of the factory ringtones. Pierce isn’t really a music guy. Royal and I sit side by side on the bed and he sees Pierce’s name. He nods when I pick it up. “Hello?”

  I can feel all eyes on me. But I don’t meet any of them. I hear a sob and my shoulders slump. “She left.”

  “Where are you?” I whisper. That sob brings back so many memories. “Please.”

  “In Royal’s driveway.” He sobs again and I throw my phone down.

  “Ash, he’s outside. I think I should go first.” I look at Victor and make eye contact, which is something I never do. “She’s going to contact you. We all know she is. Pierce is out there, crying.” Then I laugh. The noise is deranged. “Pierce crying. This is what she’s left him to be. I told you when I was seven, but you didn’t listen.”

  Ash looks from me to Victor, who she focuses on. “What did she tell you?”

  Victor clenches his fist but doesn’t look at her. No, he keeps looking at me. “That Anna would destroy Courtney.”

  “That’s the thing about this family.” I look at both of them. “No one ever listens to me.” Then I go outside to comfort my cousin.

  I find him in his car. No music, no noise, just the silence of the night. I climb in the passenger side and just sit. He doesn’t speak but he does grab my hand. Ten minutes pass before I speak. “Ash is really worried about you.”

  He laughs through his tears and the noise grates on my skin. “Believe it or not, Van is worried about me, too. I stole his girlfriend and he’s worried about me.”

  “He’s called you?” I ask.

  Pierce nods. “Yeah, and I answered because I wanted to hear him yell at me. I wanted to hear him beat me down. It’s what I deserve.” Then he wrenches his hand out of mine and starts punching the steering wheel. “That bitch! That fucking bitch! She knew what she was doing! She wanted us to fucking hate each other and fight over her! I told that whore I loved her!” He stops punching the wheel only to lay his head against it. He broke the horn, so it just sits there blaring. “I love her. Why do I love a person like that? She told Van when she broke up with him she was going to go after me. And I fell right into her trap. Then she told me she couldn’t ever love me. I was a weak person and she needed a real man. Then she kicked me out of her house. She didn’t even care, Wesley. She just stood there; no emotion whatsoever. She was so cold.”

  “I don’t know why, Pierce. I just knew she was going to do this. If I had known she broke up with Van, then I would have warned you,” I whisper, rubbing his back.

  “HA! Shows what you know! We’ve been fucking since you started dating Royal. She wouldn’t leave Van. And I didn’t care because I wanted her so much! I’m so fucked up.”

  A new sense of rage hits me. I don’t react to Pierce’s confession but inside I’m boiling. The next time I see Annabella Gage, she better run in the opposite direction. I’m coming after her with guns blazing.

  I say more soothing things to Pierce and text Royal to bring Ash down. When I see them I want to run to Annabella’s house. I want to end her.

  I calmly climb out of the car and run into Royal’s outstretched arms. “Are you okay, Duchess?” he asks, kissing the top of my head.

  “I’ll be okay as long as I’m in your arms,” I tell him, and it’s the truth. I’ll be fine as long as I have Royal. “Though I can’t say the same for Annabella. She’s a dead woman walking.”

  Epilogue

  Seven Weeks Later…

  I step out of my car and shield my eyes from the sunlight. Pierce stands with his back to me. His shoulders are tense and his hair has gotten longer. He stands next to his car listening to my boyfriend talk. I wonder what they are saying but I decide I don’t care.

  I was so worried about Pierce without Annabella, but it turns out I shouldn’t have been. He fits in with Royal and Channing like he should have been there all along. It helps that Channing and Ashley are working on their relationship. Pierce feels more comfortable around them knowing he doesn’t have to worry about Ashley anymore.

  Royal’s entire face lights up when he spots me. I love to see that. I make someone that happy. He makes me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world. It doesn’t hurt that he tells me that everyday. Every time I wake up I want to run around and dance my heart out because this amazing guy loves me.

  After Trey died, I didn’t think I would ever feel this way again. It’s crazy to think I’ve had two loves in the short time I’ve been on this earth. And I’ve come to think that just maybe I was here to love Trey so he would know what it was like before he passed. And just maybe I made his life that much more amazing. I know he made my life that much more amazing.

  And I think I’m going to love Royal for the rest of my life. It’s not something I know, just something I feel deep in my bones. To see him light up the way he does, who would ever want to lose that?

  He runs over to me, Pierce following behind him. “Let me see!” he exclaims excitedly.

  I bite my lip and look at Pierce. At first glance he looks healthy and whole, but if you look deep into those green eyes, you would see sorrow unlike anything else. I never thought Pierce and I would switch places. I’m the one madly in love now, and he’s the one mourning for a girl who shouldn’t have left.

  The only person who knows where Annabella is, is Victor. Well I’m sure Ash knows too, but we told her we didn’t want to know. We didn’t care. And the funny part about it is, Pierce sounded like he meant it. I think slowly but surely, Annabella will no longer be the girl for Pierce.

  “Fine,” I tell Royal, kissing his cheek. His warm skin smells like home and I can’t wait to be wrapped up with him later. I raise up my shirt and turn around so they can see my lower back. I turned eighteen yesterday and I told Royal I wanted a tattoo. He wanted to come with me, but I said I needed to do it alone. I guess he thought I wanted a Trey tattoo, when in reality I wanted a tattoo to represent all the men in my life.

  “Oh,” Pierce whispers, and I imagine his eyes getting wide.

  “It’s beautiful, Duchess,” Royal says, and kisses the top of my head.

  I had the artist draw up a sun, a mighty sun shining so bright. Then I had him add a slightly bigger star on the right side. On the left side I said I wanted a smaller moon. And around the bottom I asked that he add a cloud to hold them all up. It turned out amazing. The colors are bright and vibrant, just like Royal.

  “The sun is Royal, the star is Pierce, the moon is Trey and the cloud-”

  “Is Bentley. That’s amazing, girl. The guy did a really good job.” Royal cuts me off and lowers my shirt back down.

  I turn around and stick out my tongue. “So, you really like it?”

  “I love it, Wes. It’s amazing, but then again, it’s tattooed on you.” Then he winks before kissing me deeply.

  Pierce clears his throat and looks a little off. “You ready to get going? Royal, you have that swim meet?” Pierce raises his eyebrows and smirks.

  “Right. I’ll see you later,” Royal says, kissing my ear where he whispers, “I love you. Always.” Then he jogs off, weaving through the cars parked in the lot.

  “You two are so cute. I kind of want to snuggle you both and take you home with me,” Pierce taunts, his voice full of sarcasm.

  “Okay, Mr. Moody. Let’s head over to Paisley’s. Are you sure you want to hang out with us girls?” I purse my lips because I know it’s the last thing he will probably want.

  He sighs. “Mom went out of town for the weekend and I refuse to stay at Ash and Vic’s. You’re stuck with me.” Then his face clouds over with disgust. “I don’t feel like being alone and I’m not sitting at this swim meet. I like Royal and Channing just fine, but I can’t handle them in Speedos.”

  “Well, it’s a pretty good sight.” He groans before jogging back to his car. I shake my head and climb into mine. He follows me over to Paisley’s,
even though he lives a few houses down.

  We walk up to Paisley’s guesthouse. And by that, I mean, Paisley lives with her grandfather who’s going through a divorce with her grandmother. But Paisley was living in the guesthouse before that went down. The grandmother is crazy and a horrible person, or so Royal has told me. I don’t really bring it up around Paisley because I can tell it makes her sad.

  She opens the door after I knock but is distracted by the phone in her hand. “You can’t tell him! No, no, no! Let Rachel tell him! I mean it, Channing. If you fucking say anything I’m going to cut your junk off!” She screams and hangs up on him.

  Then she looks up at us and then down at her phone. “Okay. You have walked into a crazy situation. I’m sorry that you did, but there’s not much I can do about it.” Then she grabs my arm and pulls me inside, before pointing toward her bedroom. “Go in there and take care of Rachel. For some damn reason you’re the only one who can calm her down.” Then she grabs Pierce and pulls him inside. “Channing has his PS3 hooked up in the living room. Play whatever you want. This is going to be a long dramatic day. I know how you are with drama so just sit there and pretend it’s not going on.” Pierce nods, so I go into the bedroom and find Rachel crying on the bathroom floor.

  I take in her mascara-streaked face and the way she is clutching her stomach. Then I take in the three pregnancy tests lying on the bathroom counter. “Oh my god!” I exclaim without thinking.

  “When did you get here?” she moans.

  “Just now. Oh my god,” I say, sinking to my knees in front of her.

  “You already said that,” she mumbles, trying to wipe some tears off her face.

  “I know, but you’re pregnant. I’m having trouble wrapping my brain around this. What are we going to do?” Then I laugh because I’m in shock and too much crap has been thrown at me. “At least you can hide it till you graduate. That way you won’t get shit at school.”