Broken Dreams (Delos Series Book 4)

by Lindsay McKenna

  Cathy had become conscious as he’d carried her to the first medevac that had landed. It had scared the hell out of him to look into her eyes and see that they were vacant, as if she’d left her body. Gage had never seen anything like that in his life, but it told him what these women had undergone. And as he had looked over the rest of the group still in the cave being triaged by the female physician among them, he saw terror, anguish, and unspeakable horrors reflected in their eyes and expressions.

  Turning, he watched the medic pull a blanket over Alexa. He was asking her a lot of examination questions, and she kept pushing his hands away from her, as if she didn’t want to be touched. Unsettled, Gage sat there, wanting to get up and intercede, but the g-force pushed him down in the seat as the Black Hawk gained altitude, turning, heading back toward Bagram.

  “Don’t touch me!” Alexa yelled, shoving the medic’s hand off her arm.

  Gage rose, coming over, hand on the pole that held the litter in place against the wall. He got the medic’s attention. “She’s been hurt by men. Can you back off?”

  The crewman gave Gage a frustrated look. “I’m just doing my job. I need to see if she’s injured.”

  “Listen, brother, she’s been through hell. She’s ambulatory. What do you say you just let her be? We’ll be landing in about twenty minutes and she’ll be taken into the ER,” Gage told him, keeping his hand on the crewman’s shoulder because he wasn’t going to allow him to touch Alexa again. The fear in her eyes, the panic, told him a lot. “She’s traumatized. Give her some space?”

  The crewman scowled. “I was just trying to help her.”

  “I know,” Gage said, “but she needs time. Maybe get her a bottle of water to drink?”

  The crewman nodded. He pulled away from Gage’s hand and walked to a nearby locker, opening it. “Here,” he said, “you give it to her.”

  Giving the crewman a look of gratitude, Gage took the cold bottle of water. “Yeah. Thanks, brother.”

  Alexa struggled to sit up, her legs dangling over the litter. Gage drew near, making her feel safe. He handed her the opened bottle of water. “Th-thanks,” she managed to say.

  Gage stood there, his body a protective wall, his arm on the top of the bulkhead above her. He knew she needed to feel safe. It was written all over her. She took the bottle in both her dirty hands, tipping her head back, drinking all the water. When she was done, she shakily wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, giving the bottle to Gage.

  “More?”

  She gave a jerky nod.

  “Stay put,” he said, going over to the locker and opening it up.

  Gage had recognized the deep-seated terror in Alexa’s eyes, she couldn’t stop crying. Before he gave her the second bottle, he smoothed the tears away with his thumb. He heard her utter a sound, saw her relief as he grazed her cheek. At least she wasn’t telling him not to touch her, and for that, sharp consolation raced through him.

  “Drink all you want,” he told her, placing it into her hands. The look of gratefulness she gave him nearly broke his heart. She was like a frightened child looking for anyplace to hide. What had they done to Alexa? It ate at his gut, and he wanted to ask but knew he couldn’t. Not right now. The other women had a similar expression in their eyes, too. Anger simmered in him. What had those bastards done to them? What? He was going crazy wanting to know. He also didn’t want to know.

  The Black Hawk began to lose altitude.

  The crewman came over but remained at a respectful distance. “Ma’am? I need you to lie back down, please. We’ll be landing shortly.”

  Alexa tensed. “Don’t touch me.”

  “No, ma’am,” he said, holding up his gloved hands. “I won’t touch you.”

  “I’ll get her tucked in,” Gage told him with a look that was easy for the crewman to read.

  “Yeah, fine. Thanks.”

  Alexa handed him the bottle and slowly moved.

  “Do you want help?” Gage asked, moving in front of her, protecting her from the eyes of the crewman.

  “N-no . . . I’m just slow . . .”

  It was more than that and Gage knew it. He saw Alexa’s mouth, those beautiful lips of hers, thin with pain. Something was going on, but he didn’t know what. She seemed stiff and more than a little tense as she slowly lay down, stretching out her legs. The burka moved up, revealing her calves, and he reached to pull it back down, to cover her. She gave him a look of thank you. She lay on her right side, her head on the pillow, her back to the bulkhead. Saying nothing, he drew the heavy wool blanket up to her waist, leaned down, and caught her exhausted gaze. “You okay?”

  She reached out, her fingers touching his bare arm. “I am now . . . thanks . . .” And then she gripped him tightly. “Gage?”

  “Yes?”

  “Don’t leave me alone in ER. Don’t go.”

  The sudden hysteria hidden in her raspy voice made his gut tighten. He reached out and gently touched her pale cheek. “I’m going nowhere. I’ll be at your side every step of the way, okay?” The relief in Alexa’s eyes tore at him. She gave a jerky nod and released him, tucking her hands against her body.

  Grimly, Gage turned, standing guard as the helicopter hovered and began to land at the Bagram hospital. Right now, she wanted him nearby and was allowing him to touch her. His jaw tightened as he wiped his mouth. Alexa’s captivity was at an end, but whatever she’d experienced at the hands of the Taliban may have imprisoned her mind, her emotions, and even her soul. Her journey back was just beginning. And so was his.

  CHAPTER 14

  Alexa wanted to get out, now! The intense hustle-bustle of the ER was overwhelming to her raw senses. They had brought her in and transferred her to a gurney in an open cubicle surrounded on three sides by green curtains that hung floor to ceiling.

  She’d briefly seen other hostages being taken to other cubicles, and the air crackled with tension. Gage remained at her side as she sat there, her legs dangling over the gurney, her muddy, wet slippered feet numb with cold.

  A male doctor in his midforties entered, gripping a clipboard, all business. The name tag read: “Parlin, S., Major, U.S. Army.”

  Instantly, Alexa stiffened as he approached. A nurse followed him in, looking harried. Her heart began to pound, and she couldn’t control the flood of adrenaline suddenly spurting into her bloodstream. Flashes of the other doctor, the one who had so painfully invaded her body, overlaid this doctor. She tried to fight the vision but was consumed by the terror leaking through her.

  Reaching out, she gripped Gage’s arm, shrinking back near him as the doctor approached.

  Gage looked at her, confused, but he stepped in front of her, sensing her fear.

  The doctor halted, scowling up at him. “You can leave, Sergeant,” he snapped. “You’ve got no business being here. She’s my patient. I need to get a rape kit done and to examine her.”

  Before Gage could protest, he felt Alexa’s fingers dig into his arm. He didn’t even have to turn to see what was in her face. Holding up his hand, he said in a low, warning tone, “Sir, you need to stand down. No man is going to touch her. I need to have her examined by a woman doctor. Can you get one in here, please?”

  Parlin glared at him. “Just who the hell do you think you are?”

  Alexa tried to steady her breathing, to stop the swirl of violent emotions shearing through her, but she couldn’t. The doctor had on a pair of metal-framed glasses. He was tall and arrogant, and she wanted to scream, to run away. Gage must have sensed her panic because he moved closer, sliding his arm around her waist, holding her against his body.

  “Sir, with all due respect, I’m her fiancé, and I’m going nowhere.” It was a lie, but Gage didn’t care. He knew if the patient was married or engaged, the person was allowed to stay, and hell could freeze over, but he wasn’t leaving Alexa to this cold, uncaring male doctor. He drilled a warning look into Parlin’s widening eyes. “She’s been harmed by a man or men. You’re not touching her.” He sn
arled, “Get a woman physician down here to care for her, or I’m taking her out of here right now. She doesn’t need this. She needs care, not attitude. Do we understand one another, sir?”

  Alexa couldn’t steady her breathing, her breasts rising and falling sharply beneath the burka. She watched the doctor’s long face break into anger. Gage remained quiet, standing strong, staring him down, daring him to speak. The nurse, Angela Trumbull, slunk forward, young and unsure of herself.

  “Dr. Parlin? We do have an obstetrician on duty, Dr. Pamela Griffin. I could call her down from that floor. She could see Captain Culver, possibly?”

  Parlin snapped his head to the left, glaring down at the nurse. He moved his jaw, as if wanting to bite Gage. “Yes,” he said abruptly, “get her down here.” Glaring at Gage, he muttered, “You’re in a lot of trouble, mister. I don’t know who you are, but I’m going to find out.”

  “Don’t bother,” Gage said quietly. “I’m Sergeant Gage Hunter, USMC. Sniper.”

  Parlin’s eyes narrowed on him. “I’m not finished with you, Sergeant. You’ll be hearing from me. I’m filing insubordination charges against you.”

  With a half smile, Gage nodded. “I’ll look forward to it, Major.”

  The doctor whirled around, striding away.

  Nurse Trumbull moved quietly to the other side of Alexa. She studied her with sympathy. “You just try to relax, Captain Culver. I’ll personally go find Dr. Griffin and ask her to see you right away, okay?”

  Alexa nodded, closing her eyes. “I-I just want to get out of here . . . now . . . I can’t handle this . . .”

  Reaching out, Trumbull patted her hand. “I understand. Let me see what I can do for you, ma’am.”

  “Y-yes . . . thank you . . .”

  Trumbull nodded and pulled the curtain across the front of the cubicle before she left. Alexa breathed a sigh of relief, shaking uncontrollably. She released Gage’s arm. “I’m sorry,” she whispered unsteadily. “That bastard will charge you, Gage.”

  He turned, opening his arms, sliding them around her hunched shoulders. “He’s a pissant,” he muttered, kissing her wrinkled brow. “Nothing for you to give one thought of worry to. Now, come here and let me hold you. That’s what you really need right now.”

  Blindly, Alexa moaned his name and fell against him as he drew her in close to his body. He was resting his arms lightly across her bruised shoulders, and she tolerated the pain because she desperately needed his touch. Gage smelled of sweat and his own special male scent that calmed her, his arms encircling her, giving her his warmth, his care. She closed her eyes, resting her cheek against his chest. Gage felt so strong and steady. She felt spineless, as if the last two days of her life were avalanching down upon her with full force. Her emotions were wild, untamed, and tearing through her. All that mattered, all she wanted, was Gage, and he was here. He was here.

  “Have my parents been notified I’m safe?” she asked.

  “I’m pretty sure someone has already notified them, but I’ll double-check for you as soon as we get you to a quieter area.”

  “Okay . . . thanks. They’ve got to be so worried . . .”

  Gage gently caressed her hair. When he smoothed his hand across her shoulder, she flinched and cried out. Instantly, he lifted his hand, concerned. Pulling away, he looked down at Alexa. “What? Are you hurt there?” he demanded huskily. Pain was in her darkened hazel eyes. Her lips compressed.

  “Yes . . . I got beaten with a belt,” she admitted.

  Air rushed out of Gage’s lungs as he stood there, hearing the terror in her voice, seeing it in her eyes. “Damn,” he rasped. And then he controlled his reaction. In that second, Gage wanted to kill the man who had done this to her. Wrestling with rage to keep it deep inside him, he smoothed hair away from her face. “What can I do? Just tell me.”

  She managed a broken half smile. “Don’t touch my back. Not right now.”

  “Okay,” Gage rasped. “Where else are you hurt, Alexa?”

  “My back is all . . .”

  “Then I won’t hold you.”

  She made a sound of protest. “No, just hold me lightly. I need you, Gage.”

  Her soft cry ripped through him. “Okay, okay, it’s all right. Come here, I’ll just hold you until Dr. Griffin gets here.” She buried her face against him, sliding her arms around his middle, clinging to him as if terrified that she would be torn away from him. She was trembling, and it tore him up even further. He nuzzled her ear, rasping, “I wish . . . I wish we were anywhere but here. I’d take you in my arms and take care of you, Alexa. I’d hold you for however long you wanted to be held. That’s what you need right now, just some care. You’ve been through hell.” His voice cracked with emotion.

  Alexa hadn’t known she had that many tears in her. They leaked out unbidden as he continued to caress her hair. How desperately she needed a kind, caring human touch. The animal inside her was howling and frightened, wanting to defend itself against anything and anyone. Gage was her island. Her anchor. The only one she wanted to protect her. She felt him being so careful, so light with his arms around her back. It felt as if the earth had been torn out from beneath her feet and she was in free fall.

  Gage was her safe harbor, her security, because he intuitively understood what she’d endured—and barely survived.

  Dr. Griffin quietly entered the cubicle. She smiled gently over at Gage as he looked up. “How is Alexa doing, Sergeant Hunter?”

  Gage instantly liked the tall, slender woman in a white lab coat, a stethoscope around her neck. Best of all, she had a riot of carrot-red hair in a topknot. Gage guessed her to be in her early fifties. “She just needs a quiet place, ma’am. This ER is battering her.”

  Nodding, her blue eyes sparkling, Pamela walked over to Alexa. “I’ve got a room waiting for her up on my OB floor,” she told Gage. “If you can just go and grab one of those wheelchairs out in the hall and bring it in here?”

  Alexa pulled away from Gage, wiping her eyes with trembling fingers, finding Dr. Griffin’s maternal nature exactly what she needed. “T-thank you for coming,” she whispered. “I-I couldn’t stand a man touching me.”

  Gage touched Alexa’s fingers and squeezed them. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

  She nodded, dropping her hands into the lap of her burka.

  Pamela watched her for a moment, waiting until Gage left. Reaching out, she placed her hand over Alexa’s. “Dr. Parlin wants you to get a rape kit examination. Is it necessary, Alexa? Were you raped?”

  “N-no. Not raped,” she whispered.

  “Good to hear.” She turned as Nurse Trumbull slipped into the cubicle. “No need for a rape kit, nurse.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” She turned around and left.

  “So,” Pamela inquired, giving her a warm look, “can you tell me if you have any injuries?”

  Alexa told her about her back. And then, hesitantly, told her about the other doctor’s examination of her. She saw Dr. Griffin’s eyes flash with anger but she kept her hand over Alexa’s, giving her the compassion she so desperately needed at this moment.

  “Okay,” Pamela whispered, “let’s take this a step at a time. What I want to do is give you a mild sedative. Nothing to knock you out, but to steady you emotionally. Are you okay with that?”

  Alexa felt shamed. “I-I can’t control how I’m feeling right now, doctor. I-I’m trying, but I feel like I’m flying loose inside. I’ve never been like this,” she said, avoiding the doctor’s kindly gaze.

  “Listen, you’ve been through hell. This a normal reaction to it.”

  “I-I’ll take the medicine. I need to calm down. I have to get myself back together.”

  “My dear child, that will take some time. But”—she smiled faintly—“I think that young man of yours is the best medicine you can have right now. He obviously loves you, and he’s someone you trust.”

  If Alexa hadn’t been so lost in her scattered emotions, she might have reacted more strongly to the do
ctor’s words about Gage’s loving her. They hadn’t known one another very long, so she didn’t know how that could have happened. And then she gave herself an internal shake. She’d already admitted to herself that she’d been falling in love with Gage Hunter from the moment she’d met him. “I want him with me, doctor. I don’t know what I’d do without him being near right now. He . . .”—she stumbled, ashamed—“ . . . makes me feel safe. I just don’t feel safe anywhere right now . . . I’m sure it will pass . . .”

  “I completely understand.” She patted her hand. “I’ll make it happen.”

  Gage entered with the wheelchair. In a few moments, Alexa was in it, and he was pushing her out of the hectic ER and down a quieter hallway toward a bank of elevators, with Dr. Griffin leading the way. Alexa was pale, her eyes darting as if she were a trapped animal with no way to escape. Gage wanted to help her, to protect her from all of this. He felt his frustration begin to build. Torn up inside, Gage saw the suffering in Alexa’s face, the way the corners of her mouth were constantly tucked inward in pain. He worried about her back. What else had happened to her?

  Right now, all he wanted to do was ease her return to the world she knew. Once they were in the small, private room on the obstetrics floor, he saw Alexa begin to relax, her shoulders slumping, exhaustion darkening her eyes.

  He crouched down, one hand on the wheelchair, the other on her knee. “What do you need?”

  Wrinkling her nose, she said, “A shower? Getting out of this horrible-smelling burka?” She warmed as she saw Gage nod.