True Love Lost (An FBI Romance Thriller (book 3))

by Kelley, Morgan

  Point was taken. “I really hate how you’re logical like my brother,” he said, sighing. All the anger was now gone.

  “Wow, I come in here to help you and you insult me by calling me logical. Nice one,” she laughed.

  Whitefox kissed her on the forehead and continued playing with a long curl. “How do I fix it, Lyzee? I’m not good with this kind of thing. You’re my only frame of reference. I make you mad, I let you beat on me and we’re good.”

  “Violence is the answer, my friend,” she quipped, and then got serious. “Tomorrow you tell her you’re sorry and the truth.”

  “Which is?” he asked.

  “That she has you tied up in knots because you like her.”

  Callen stared down at Elizabeth and contemplated his words. “I’ve only loved one woman in my life,” he said, honestly. “I haven’t cared about a lot of people in my life.” He spoke the truth because she would protect him. “Is it wrong to build a life with someone else when you can’t give them your whole heart?” he asked, quietly. Life was seldom simple, and he’d learned that a long time ago. People were going to love who they loved, and it wasn’t always going to end the way they wanted. Maybe being in love with Elizabeth wasn’t the most logical thing in the universe, but he had to believe it was for a reason. It was completely out of his control. Deep down he knew the truth; anyone else was just a distraction from what he lost to her.

  His heart.

  “We can love lots of people in our life, Callen.” Elizabeth thought about what he said. “I know you can too. Tell her you’re sorry and try to enjoy life and live for the moment. You know what’s in your heart, and you know how you feel. It doesn’t make it wrong, if you honestly feel it. Love is unconditional, and that’s how it needs to be. Not everyone fits into the same mold. There’s nothing wrong with your feelings.” Elizabeth patted his cheek.

  Whitefox gazed directly into her eyes, believing her

  “I wouldn’t lie to you even if I’m the other woman. What we have isn't going to disappear if you open yourself for a chance. I’ll still be part of you. We’re a family and that’s unbreakable.”

  “Thanks Lyzee,” he answered, helping her sit up. “I love you,” he said, grateful that she always had his back.

  “I love you too,” she replied, leaning back to give him a kiss. “Night Cal,” she whispered, and then touched his cheek. “If you need me, you know where to find me. Come get me. Sleep is overrated, and I’m always available for you.”

  As she left, he found himself smiling. Yeah, he was pretty lucky to have her in his life. Maybe the love they had was the best kind. It was unconditional, and unclouded by a physical relationship. All he knew was she’d always be there, and help him get through all the things that tied him and tripped him up. Deep in his heart, he knew he could love Desdemona and try to start a relationship. The love of his life just gave him permission to open himself up to the possibilities, and still have her to fall back on just in case.

  He was a very lucky man to have found true love, as unconventional as it may be.

  Now came the hard part. He had to fix the mess he made with the doctor.

  It was late in the night, and she just had no hope of sleeping. When she came back to her room, she could hear the whispers next door of Callen and Elizabeth. There was no doubt that he told her everything that happened, about their fight. She felt so incredibly stupid. There she was in the kitchen, making out with the sexiest man she’d ever seen, and she had to go and use the word ‘mortified’. For some unknown reason, the man wanted her, and here she had to hurt his feelings. Callen and his family had been nothing but kind to her, and even offered her friendship, and she threw it back at him. What a complete moron.

  In frustration, she climbed out of bed, and decided to go make a cup of tea. Maybe it would calm her down, and help her finally sleep. Granted, she didn’t need much, but she still needed more than zero.

  In the kitchen, she stood with her back to the sink as she drank her tea. A slight click drew her attention, and when she looked over, it took her a few seconds to register what she saw. Horror and fear filled her, as she saw the deputy that Elizabeth beat up earlier in the day, opening the previously locked door. Not only had he escaped, but he was in their kitchen, and the knife this time didn’t look fake.

  “You’re coming with me bitch,” he moved at her, and Desdemona screamed.

  It had to be the loudest scream that ever came from her mouth in her whole life. It didn’t stop the man from dragging her toward the kitchen door, and trying to get her out of the house. If he got her through that door, she was going to be dead. They’d never find her in the snow and dark. She began fighting, and fighting hard, as he dragged her across the room to the back door.

  Bobby Lee Tills wanted her to stop screaming, so he hit her, just in time for the two men to race through the door guns drawn. He released the woman in a panic and headed for the snow covered yard.

  “Desi,” Whitefox rushed to her side and pulled her against his body, cradling her in his arms. There was a trail of blood from her lip to her chin, and he was scared shitless.

  “I’ll go after him,” said Blackhawk.

  Elizabeth ran in her gun out too. “What the hell?” She rushed to her new friend, and grabbed the towel off the counter, holding it to her lip.

  “Both of you go, I’ll watch the door,” she nodded. “Hurry and don’t let Ethan go alone,” she whispered to her brother-in-law.

  Whitefox contemplated it for a second, and he knew the woman would be safe with Elizabeth. “Wait for me!” Whitefox grabbed his boots and his jacket, and hurried after his brother.

  Blackhawk nodded. “We can track him in the snow. Elizabeth, shoot to kill if he comes through that door!” her husband ordered, as he slid into his parka and boots. “Keep the door locked.”

  Both men were out the door in under a minute and on the trail of a man that crossed the line a second time. This time they were going to find him and show him what justice really entailed.

  Elizabeth sat on the floor with her friend lying against her and the baby bump. She hugged her, as she held the towel to her mouth. “Are you going to be okay?” she asked, softly.

  “No,” she answered, and then burst into tears.

  Elizabeth wrapped her arms around her, and just let the woman sob. “Shhhhh, it’ll be okay,” she whispered and stroked the woman’s hair with her gun hand. “You’re safe now. I won’t let anyone hurt you,” she promised, as she watched the doorways in the room in case the deputy returned and made another attempt to take one of them.

  “I’m not a spider,” she whispered through the sobs and tears. “I’m not like you!” All she wanted was to be like Elizabeth, for so many reasons.

  “That’s okay, Desdemona. Sometimes we all have to take a turn as the fly.” Elizabeth knew she herself spent many scary moments trapped in the web.

  Bobby Lee Tills ran through the trees and towards the road. He just needed to get to the main road and away from the FBI agents that he was sure were chasing him through the woods. Damn that stupid woman, he almost had her out the door. She had to go and scream. Now the FBI would be searching for him with a vengeance. He’d tried to take one of their own.

  Stupid!

  Stupid!

  Stupid!

  When he finally hit the main road, he rushed out into the street and flagged down a vehicle going by and it actually stopped. This might be his lucky night. Then he saw who was driving, and he knew he was home free.

  “Hey, you need a lift? Did your car break down?”

  “Yeah, can you get me out of here and fast?” asked Bobbly Lee Tills.

  “Sure thing,” the driver answered, pulling away finally.

  “Wow, it’s lucky I ran into you out here.”

  “I was just getting out of work.” There was a pause. “Hey you look cold, why don’t you have some coffee. Pour yourself some in that clean travel mug. You look frozen to the bone.”

  “S
hit, thanks. I am frozen solid,” he said, pouring a big mug full and starting to drink. “Hey, just the way I like it- sweet, thanks a lot!” He was grateful to have run into a friend.

  “Not a problem. Have another mug if you want.”

  “This is my lucky day,” said Bobby Lee Tills, smiling smugly. Those idiot FBI agents weren’t catching him tonight.

  The driver laughed. “It certainly is.”

  Elizabeth helped a shaking Desdemona to the couch; she tucked a blanket around her, and made her some tea. Then she returned to sit beside her, arm around her shoulder and loaded Glock in her lap.

  “I was so scared,” she said, still shaking. “Being abducted is a scary thing.” She drank some of her tea.

  “I couldn’t agree with you more,” Elizabeth said, rubbing her hand up and down her arm. “I’ve lived it before.”

  “You’ve been abducted?” she asked, curiously.

  Elizabeth nodded. “Serial killer took me, drugged me, and then hunted me through the woods to kill me and hurt Ethan and Callen.”

  Desdemona gasped. “How long did he have you for?”

  “I think I was unconscious for about four hours, and then there was six hours in the woods trying to escape him. Ten hours give or take a few.”

  “I don’t think I could survive that,” she said, softly. Yeah Elizabeth Blackhawk was tough. “When was this?” she asked, feeling a little better, knowing her boss understood the fear she’d just felt.

  “Four months ago.”

  Desdemona put her head on her new friend’s shoulder and closed her eyes. “I wish I was as strong as you,” she said, softly. Who was she kidding? Desdemona Adare wished she WAS Elizabeth Blackhawk, and for a myriad of reasons. She was fearless, and she knew that her friend owned the heart of the man she desperately wanted to belong to her. All she could hope for was a sliver of his heart, and she’d be happy with that.

  “You don’t know how strong you are, until you have to survive. I personally think you’re very strong.”

  She thought about it. “I screwed up with Callen tonight.”

  “He told me about it.” Elizabeth wasn’t going to lie to the woman, it was against the girlfriend code.

  Of course he did. There wouldn’t ever be anything he kept from her. She was truly his confidant and best friend. That was obvious to her. “How mad is he?”

  “I’m pretty sure this will get him right past his anger, and he’ll completely forget that there was even a fight.” Elizabeth knew the men in her life.

  “You guys are pretty close and have an interesting relationship.”

  Here it came. Elizabeth was waiting for this to come sooner or later. “We’re incredibly close and I guess you could look at us and say that.”

  “I saw the tattoo on his shoulder. Are the initials yours?”

  “They’re mine. Wyler has them on his chest, granddad has them on his forearm, and Callen has them on his shoulder. They all got them after I saved them from their homicidal family member.”

  Desdemona was trying to not be jealous, and she relied on the fact that she knew Elizabeth loved her husband. But still. It just seemed unfair. How unlucky could one person get in their life? The woman had a man that loved her. Did she really need two? “I heard about that from a lab tech,” she said softly, trying to let the jealousy go. Before knowing the woman personally, it was one of the reasons she was afraid of Elizabeth at the beginning.

  “I need to know if Callen and my relationship is going to be a problem for you?” she asked, waiting.

  “If I said yes what happens then?” She wanted to scream yes very loudly. It did bother her, because she was green with envy. She knew pretending it didn’t was wrong but still…

  Elizabeth laughed. “Then you’re going to lead a very stressed out life. I love Callen and we’re very close, but then you have to factor in the rest. Callen practically lives at our house, and he and Ethan do everything together. The Blackhawk men are very family oriented. If you think you can fracture it then you’re asking for a whole world of pain,” Elizabeth warned her for her own benefit. She agreed to help Callen Whitefox, but she had no intention of lying to her friend.

  Desdemona thought about it and figured it was best to tell a white lie. At least she was getting the closeness of the family out of the deal. After all, isn't that what she desired most? A family that welcomed her to be part of them. Right in that moment she made the sacrifice, because she believed in time, she could make Callen love her more. One day she could replace the feelings he had for Elizabeth. All it would take was time.

  “No. I’m really glad he has you as family and that you love him like you do. He’s a really sweet guy and you’re both lucky to have each other as family.”

  Elizabeth didn’t buy it for a second. “There’s room in our family for more people,” she offered, for Callen’s sake.

  Desdemona felt her eyes fill up with more tears, and she hid them from her boss.

  If only that was a possibility, until the truth that lived in her heart finally escaped.

  Both brothers backtracked and raced back to the house, where the women were holed up, and trying to remain safe. They’d tracked Bobby Lee Tills about a mile, until he hit the interstate, and then he was gone, like a ghost. Either he had a car parked there waiting, or someone picked him up and got him out of there fast. He was fortunate, because he had two Natives accustomed to tracking, chasing him through the trees and ready to end his life.

  When they arrived back at the house, they were met by Elizabeth at the back door. “How’d it go?”

  “Where’s Desdemona?” questioned Whitefox, nervously.

  “Sleeping on the couch. She took a Xanax and crashed. The asshole scared the shit out of her completely.” Elizabeth hugged her husband, once he was free of his parka. “Are you going to call the sheriff?”

  “Yeah, the tech team can wait until morning. It’s dark out and the weather is turning shitty. We’ll cut them a break until dawn. We already know who it was, so no need to make them work in the dark.”

  “I’m going to carry Desdemona to bed and make sure she doesn’t wake up scared. If you need me, I’ll be in her room,” he said, waiting to see if either of them would make a comment.

  “Night, Callen,” said Elizabeth, kissing him on the cheek, and squeezing his hand in reassurance.

  Ethan watched his brother leave. “He’s going to make a move on the doctor.”

  “Yeah, he is.”

  Blackhawk thought about it. “It feels off to me, baby.”

  “Me too, Ethan, but we have to let Callen drive this one on his own. This is his journey not ours. We just love and protect him no matter what the outcome. Maybe we’re both wrong.”

  Not likely. “I already told Callen to forget what granddad said, so I’m with you on defending my brother.”

  “I knew you would be,” she answered, smiling. Ethan Blackhawk was extremely protective of his younger brother.

  “I’ll call the sheriff while we climb into bed, you look tired baby.”

  “I am. This pregnancy thing is tough,” she said, taking his hand.

  Blackhawk grinned at her. “Want to get naked and roll around?”

  Immediately she wasn’t tired. “Okay,” she grinned wickedly. “Race you upstairs?” she said, winking at him.

  Blackhawk loved her so much; he let her have a head start.

  Callen Whitefox laid Desdemona gently in her bed, and stared around the room. There was a chair off in the corner that would be suitable to catch some zzz’s in while he watched over the ME. Then he thought about how uncomfortable that was going to be, and he looked at the bed. She was out cold. What would it hurt to just get comfortable? He was a light sleeper, and when she started to wake, he’d slide out of bed and escape to the chair. Climbing in, he got comfortable, and started to close his eyes, and then it happened. Desdemona rolled towards him and put her head on his shoulder, arm across his chest and leg across his.

  Everything i
n him clenched tightly. So much for sleeping in the same bed with the woman, and he should have known better from the start. The chance that he was going to get any sleep at all was slim to none. Here was a woman, with soft skin lying across his body, and her breath was on his neck. Now he needed to not focus on how she smelled or felt. Maybe he’d have a fighting chance.

  He looked at his watch, and counted the hours until he had to be up, maybe if he just thought about crime scenes and dead bodies, he’d forget about her and find some sleep. No, dead bodies reminded him that she was an ME, and then he thought back to the kiss, and then…

  Shit. How did his brother sleep next to a beautiful woman every night and not stay awake staring at the ceiling. Oh, yeah. He was having sex with her. That’s right, he was getting laid.

  Lucky bastard.

  This was pure torture.

  This was his karma for not sleeping in the chair.

  * * *

  She brushed her blonde hair and prepared for her evening with her lover. Right this second he was just resting, and soon they would begin their time together. Oh how she loved gazing deep in his beautiful blue eyes and whispering of her never ending love for her true love. What they had, it was special and unique and would never be matched by anyone else.

  They were soul mates. She knew from the minute they met. It was a love that would cross time and distance.

  Pulling her lipstick from her vanity, she picked the color pink, and tried it on to make sure it was just right. When she finished the task, she inspected the handiwork in the mirror and was impressed.

  “This is perfect for a night in with the love of my life,” she said, as she wandered to the kitchen to get them both a glass of wine. Hers came from the bottle on the counter, and his was the special mix she kept under the sink. Pouring a full glass of the thick liquid, she smiled seductively.