True Love Lost (An FBI Romance Thriller (book 3))

by Kelley, Morgan

That’s when Callen found her. Desdemona was sitting on the rail of his porch, staring out at the snow and the two deer that were eating some leaves. His heart calmed, knowing that he wouldn’t have to wake up every morning and look for her, but trust that she’d stay.

  Whitefox walked back over for a cup of coffee and then dressed to join her on the porch. When he was home alone, he often went to his porch to watch nature or the sun rise from that exact spot. Something about having her there to do it with him lightened his heart and soul. When he first reconnected with his brother, he wanted what he had. An outsider that loved him and would always treat him like his heart mattered, and now he believed he got his wish. Doctor Desdemona Adare would keep him from living a lonely existence, as long as he could keep her safe, he’d make sure they’d live happily ever after.

  Maybe.

  There still was the entire Timothy issue that loomed on the horizon. Where he may look past his grandson fooling around with an outsider, he didn’t think he’d like the diluting of Indian blood with mixed children.

  When the idea of kids came up, something in him went hot and then cold. Just watching Elizabeth walk around, with a baby belly, and bringing the next generation of Blackhawk into the world, and it warmed his heart. Maybe one day, he’d get to see Desdemona in the same condition.

  Then he thought back to the one time he thought he got a woman pregnant, it was Kaya Cheek, and his warmth went cold. He’d forgotten to use protection with her, so he hoped she was either keeping herself safe, or she wasn’t going to reject the idea of kids.

  The icy cold crept further up his body towards his heart, at the idea that if she did get pregnant, the child would be just like him, a nameless bastard. His mood began going south, and fast. Callen fought hard to put a smile on his face, as he exited his house to join her.

  Desdemona liked the silence of the woods surrounding his home and was glad he brought her here. When she bought the house in the development, she always wondered what was on the other side of the river and the gigantic trees sheltering their secret world. Nature called to her, and this was such a restful place; she actually felt better just sitting there. When the two deer left the safety of the woods to feast on the tender leaves poking through the snow, her breath caught in her chest. There was a large buck, standing protectively over the doe. Their bodies were touching, and it made her smile.

  “You look happy,” he whispered, joining her at the rail.

  “Look how beautiful they are,” she whispered back, leaning against him when he put his arm around her. “Do they come here often?” she asked, curiously.

  “They come all the time. Sometimes it’s just the male, and sometimes the female. She’s pregnant, you can tell. When the male hovers like that, it means she’s going to be giving birth when the weather breaks.”

  “He looks like he’d kill anything that came near her,” she laughed softly. “It’s like an Ethan deer.”

  “It’s a male species thing. That protectiveness is just something we can’t fight. When you fall in love, you want to keep your woman safe. Ethan will probably hover over Elizabeth just because, even though Elizabeth can take care of herself.”

  Desdemona looked up at him, and hoped he wasn’t just referring to Ethan Blackhawk, but himself too. She knew he’d always keep her safe, and she prayed love went with that. Before she could ask him what was on his mind, they heard crunching of tires on gravel.

  Whitefox stood protectively in front of the woman, and then saw the truck and relaxed. It was only his father. How Wyler Blackhawk knew he was around was beyond him, but it probably had to do with his grandfather.

  “Hey Son,” he said, bounding up the stairs. He immediately went to his boy to hug him. Since his oldest son, Ethan had returned, the three of them were working on fixing the relationship he broke when they were boys. As he pulled back from the hug, he saw the little woman and smiled at her. This was the female that had his father all worked up in a tizzy.

  “Dad,” he stepped out from in front of her. “This is Doctor Desdemona Adare.” He watched his father’s face for any indication there was going to be coldness, because she was an outsider. When there was none he relaxed. It helped cement the man back into his life, that he didn’t make Desdemona feel unwelcome.

  Desdemona hopped off the rail and put out her hand, offering it. When the man laughed and pulled her into a hug, she wasn’t sure what to think, but she was glad he was friendly. For some reason she expected him to be aloof like his son, Ethan.

  “I’ve heard about you, Doctor. It’s a pleasure,” he smiled, releasing her. And boy had he heard about her. For three days now his father was nonstop blabbering, and it was nice to finally see what had Timothy pacing his house. She was tiny and unlike Elizabeth, his other son’s wife, she looked vulnerable and breakable.

  “You must be Wyler,” she spoke, smiling up at him. “Ethan looks just like you,” she said, noticing that the man and his son were fairly close to a genetic replica. Then she turned towards Whitefox remembering how he always sounded so sad when he talked about being the ‘bastard’. “You have your father’s facial features, and the body structure.”

  He nodded, hiding the pain because he was used to keeping it locked deep inside with anyone other than Ethan and Elizabeth Blackhawk.

  “Granddad sent me, son,” he looked over at his boy, and he looked worried.

  “I figured. What does he want?” Callen Whitefox wasn’t going to let his grandfather run Desdemona away.

  “Lunch, today.” He knew he didn’t need to say more, his son would understand that the family patriarch wanted to check the young woman out, and see if she fit or needed to go.

  “I don’t think we can make it,” he replied evenly.

  Wyler Blackhawk lifted an eyebrow. “That’s the message you want me to give to your grandfather, the head of our family?”

  Desdemona spoke up, she didn’t want there to be this tension, but obviously she knew it had everything to do with her. “Callen, we can go,” she offered, softly.

  He glanced over at her and weighed the situation. “Tell granddad, that we have some things that are FBI related off the reservation today, and if we can make it, we’ll be there.” Right now he needed to explain to Desdemona what she was walking into and what the situation was going to be like. “She’s also a vegetarian.” Whitefox threw it out there as a heads up.

  “So sitting her beside Elizabeth at the table would be a bad thing?” he smiled, trying to lighten the mood. Wyler felt bad for his son, so he went to him and hugged him, whispering to him. “Hang in there, we’ve all been there.” He too brought an outsider home once and it ended badly, because of his philandering ways. At least he still had his sons. Stepping back he spoke to Desdemona.

  “It was very nice to meet you, Doctor, and I hope that I get to see you at lunch.” He nodded and walked away whistling. He picked a non-Native, his one son did, so why wouldn’t he expect the same from his other son. Wyler really wished his father would let go of the stringent past beliefs and let his boys just relax.

  Callen Whitefox watched his father walk away.

  “What do you need to tell me, Callen? I can feel that you’re all messed up over this,” she said, softly. “You have this look on your face, and it’s scaring me.”

  “From the day I was born, my grandfather has insisted I keep my bloodlines pure. Ethan isn't full Native, his mother was an outsider, but my mother was part of the tribe. Timothy Blackhawk pretty much had one rule for us growing up. If we were to date, procreate or marry, then it needed to be with a Native woman.”

  “And I’m definitely lacking in that department.”

  “Yes.” He hated that he even had to have this conversation with her. To him, her heritage didn’t matter, and he didn’t think his mattered to her. Wasn’t that what it was supposed to be like? Unconditionally accepting of the other person after you finally found them and not being embarrassed.

  “Is it going to cause problems for your
family?” The last thing she wanted to happen was for him to be put in a position where he had to choose between her and his family. One- because she knew what they meant to him, and two- she didn’t think he’d choose her. Why would he? They just met.

  “Let’s go inside,” he said, offering her his hand.

  “Want me to make you breakfast?” she offered. “Then we can discuss this.”

  Callen didn’t know what there was to discuss, he was going to be forced to watch the old man run her through the ringer. “Okay,” he led her into the kitchen. “Have at it,” his mood was deteriorating quickly.

  “Your smartphone was beeping before,” she offered as she poured him more coffee.

  “I better check it,” he picked it up and saw the messages. One from his brother requesting him back in Red Rock later that day. “We have to head back tonight,” he said. “Ethan wants to interview Carly Kester in the morning, and he can’t take Elizabeth.”

  “He can’t?” She was surprised. “You’d think Elizabeth would insist. She doesn’t like attractive man-eaters around her husband, and I can’t blame her.” She didn’t particularly like the idea of the woman around Callen either. It was hard enough to tolerate Elizabeth as the apple of his eye.

  “It seems, Carly crossed the line and Elizabeth dumped vegetable juice down the front of her.”

  “Oh,” she snickered. “Good for her. I want to be Elizabeth Blackhawk when I grow up.”

  Whitefox laughed. “Don’t we all?” Then he tried to be serious. “Will you be okay with going back later?” he asked, flipping through his other messages. There were copies of lab reports from the FBI. They swept her house and found absolutely nothing that gave them any information.

  “Yes, I don’t mind. I just have to wait for the window repair man to fix the jimmied window frame and the alarm guy to re-wire the window. Then I’m clear.” Desdemona whipped eggs in a bowl, and watched him without saying a word. She lost him, he was thinking about something else.

  Whitefox was lost in the emails.

  “When I’m done here, I’m going to go roll naked in the snow, or maybe have a very raunchy affair with Elizabeth behind both of your backs.” She stated. “Then I thought I’d shave my head.” Then she gave up, and just made him his breakfast. This whole grandfather thing had him rattled.

  Whitefox looked up and into her eyes. “Yes on the snow, and you’re not shaving your head. I happen to like your hair,” he answered, grinning. “As for you and Elizabeth having sex, yeah I’m fine with that, but Ethan and I get to watch and take pictures.”

  Desdemona stuck out her tongue. She was pretty sure he was kidding, but there was that doubt in her mind. “Good to see you can multi task.”

  Callen was about to say something, when there was a loud explosion from outside his house. He jumped from his seat and ran to Desdemona pulling her down. “Stay here,” he said, grabbing his Glock and running for the front door.

  What waited outside astounded him. “Well holy shit,” he muttered, pulling out his phone. He dialed FBI West. When Ginny answered the phone, he spoke quickly. “Ginny get the tech team to my house, someone just blew up the Denali, and I believe it’s related to the Adare situation.

  “I’ll send them ASAP, Callen. Want me to call the Blackhawks?” she asked already paging the tech team and transmitting his address.

  “No, I’ll call them, after I call the fire department.” Desdemona touched his arm and stared in horror. “No Desi, don’t even think it, you aren’t running and that’s the end of discussion. You promised me to stay, and I’m holding you to it!” Whitefox began dialing the reservation fire department. After explaining the situation, he knew he had to call his brother and he began dialing.

  Blackhawk answered his phone on the second ring. “What’s up Cal?” he said.

  “The stalker just blew up the Denali, in my driveway.”

  “What?” He almost spilled his coffee. “Are you both okay?” he inquired, now he was beyond worried about his brother and doctor. Now it was life of death. The stalker was escalating and probably pissed that Doctor Adare was with a man.

  “We’re fine, we were inside. I called FBI West, Ginny is sending techs, and the fire department is coming.” Then he told him about the note in the book.

  “Try and keep the evidence uncontaminated, and just watch your back. I want you back here ASAP, do you hear me?” Ethan wasn’t taking any chance with his brother’s life.

  “I have to see granddad and then I’m heading back.”

  “I want to know where you are hourly,” he ordered. “The stalker is unhinged, and now you’re tagged to be in the crosshairs. This lunatic now knows where you live. You aren’t ever going back there, not until we find him. Pack all the things you need for an extended stay at our place.”

  “I’m aware and I will,” he was answering cautiously. He didn’t want Desdemona to hear the conversation. Already she was sheet white, and looked like she was going to run for the hills. “Can I bring a guest?”

  Blackhawk got his meaning. “Yes, you can bring her.”

  “Thank you for understanding.”

  “See you tonight,” he said, and then paused. “Callen, keep yourself safe, okay?” he added, softly.

  “No worries Ethan, I’ll see you at the house or sheriff’s station before dark,” and he would. If his brother was worried about him, he wasn’t going to be focused on the killer and that would risk the team there. As he hung up he could hear the fire truck coming. “I have to handle this. I want you to make breakfast, get your gun and don’t leave the inside of this house. Am I clear Desi?” he asked, lifting her chin so she was forced to look in his eyes. “I will chase you if you run, and when I catch you, I will be pissed. I take promises very serious, pinky swears included,” he warned. “If I have to drag you back, the fight will be epic.”

  She was irritated he knew she was thinking of running from him. “Be safe,” she whispered, her eyes filling with tears and then she threw her arms around his waist hugging him.

  When he left the house, she started crying. “I’m so sorry, Callen. Please don’t die instead of me.”

  Ethan was pacing as he dressed. When his wife exited the shower he knew she was staring at him. He just had to remain calm and hope his brother got back to Red River in one piece. This was the dilemma of working with family. It hit close to home. For now whoever was stalking the doctor wasn’t to the snapping point yet. Blowing up a vehicle was one thing; a sniper hiding in the woods was another and he hoped it didn’t get to that point.

  “What happened?” she asked, already knowing something bad was brewing.

  “Callen just got a nasty message from Desdemona’s stalker.”

  “Uh oh. What?”

  “The Denali was blown up.” He knew she was going to be worried, and he didn’t like stressing her while she was pregnant.

  “Are they okay?” Elizabeth was sick to her stomach. All she could think of was the dream their grandfather just relayed to her.

  “Yeah, they were in his cabin at the time.”

  Elizabeth started pacing, and rubbing her baby belly. “Did you tell them to get back here?” she asked, as she felt sick to her stomach.

  “Yeah, he’s heading to granddad’s house, and then he’ll head back here.”

  “He’s new at this, he really isn't equipped to handle this on his own, Ethan.” Now she wished they were there with him.

  Blackhawk went to his wife and pulled her against his body. “Don’t worry baby, Callen’s a smart man, and now he knows that the stakes have been raised on this one. He’ll watch his back, and keep Desdemona safe until he gets back here, and we can keep them both safe.” Part of him wasn’t thrilled at that prospect either. His pregnant wife and child were here, and that meant they could be caught in the crosshairs of the invisible enemy they now had to protect themselves from. Here he just allowed Desdemona into their inner sanctum, and was risking them all.

  “We have to help her despite
the risk,” she said, knowing what he was thinking. “Desdemona doesn’t have a chance alone now. If the stalker’s blowing things up it’s only going to get worse. It’s escalating.”

  Blackhawk was aware. “Nothing is happening to them,” he promised. “I need to shower and then we have work to do,” he said, trying to distract her.

  “Okay, I’ll get ready.” Elizabeth sat on the bed and was feeling panicky. Suddenly she needed to see if Callen was safe. She typed out a text and hit send, holding her phone and feeling the overwhelming fear beat at her.

  “Please be careful, Callen,” she whispered, as she closed her eyes and waited for his reply.

  Callen Whitefox stayed out of the way of the fire department as they extinguished the flames on the Denali. When his phone beeped he checked the incoming message.

  Please be safe and come back in one piece.

  I love you -L

  Staring down at the phone he knew how rattled she had to be over this. He dialed her number and she answered on the first ring.

  “Please be careful, Callen.”

  “Hey beautiful,” he said, hiding all the nerves in his voice. “Long time no talk. I need you to not worry about me okay? You’re pregnant and the last thing you need is to be stressed over all this.”

  Elizabeth was rattled. “We’re both worried. Don’t let anything happen to you. Baby Blackhawk needs his uncle.”

  Callen Whitefox knew that she was trying to stay calm and not show him too much emotion. “I promise I’ll be back in time for dinner. I won’t let anything happen to us.”

  “Promise?” she asked.

  “You know how you never break a promise to a Blackhawk?”

  “Yes.”

  “It’s reciprocal. I promise.”

  Elizabeth believed him, he sounded completely assured. “If you let anything happen to you I’m so going to kick your ass and be mad at you for a very long time.”

  Whitefox grinned. “No worries, I love you, beautiful. Don’t forget it.”