NO WORDS ALONE

by Autumn Dawn

  “A few minutes will be adequate,” the lord governor assured him. “We will prepare our…guests…for transport.”

  Xera was given a brief respite as both sides adjourned to assess the situation. She knew it could be less than an hour before she was speaking with Gem if the commander was prompt. In this situation, she assumed he would be, for it was unlikely the LG would complete the prisoner transfer until he got what he wanted. If the commander didn’t understand that now, he soon would.

  Ryven conferred with the LG, then came to her side. “Come. I will escort you to our room. You will want to speak with your sister in private. You prepared a message burst?” It would be easier to send off a prerecorded message in a quick burst than to count on the conversation lasting in real time.

  “Yes.” She’d included a picture of Ryven and a recent image of herself, sans ambassadorial makeup. Her sister would want the pictures. She’d asked the LG for permission to describe her new home with the lavender snow and the crystal palace. She’d thrown in a brief description of the culture at the LG’s suggestion. Perhaps he didn’t want his daughter-in-law’s family to think she was exiled to a barbarian wasteland.

  She’d given an abbreviated version of how she came to be where she was and assured her sisters Ryven wouldn’t beat her. It wouldn’t stop them from worrying, but at least they’d know that Xera would have a comfortable future. She’d said she loved them.

  It wasn’t nearly enough, but it was all she could do.

  After a little thought, she washed her face. It would help if her sister could recognize her. She left the hair, though. It was too much trouble to let Namae dress it again.

  Namae was handling being on the warship as well as could be expected. She kept her eyes downcast when she had to travel the corridors, intimidated by so many men. If she kept it up, Xera was going to start poking her soon. The girl had experienced hardship, yes, but there was no call to slouch around like a beaten dog. The girl was the equivalent of a royal princess—she should start acting like one. If she walked like a princess and looked like a princess, she would be treated as such. As far as Xera knew, the only one who had ever tormented the girl about her attacker was the accuser in her own mind.

  Unbeknownst to her, Namae had become Xera’s private project. Xera understood fear and worry. It started with a small thought and grew, circled around and came back stronger, like the first wisp of smoke in a still, quiet house. It had to be stamped out while it was still a whisper, before it gained strength and flashed over. It was so much easier to smother the spark than the full grown, ravenous fire.

  Fear was the one thing that could break the laws of physics—it could feed on itself and still keep growing.

  How did she know? Fear had been haunting Xera since the moment her ship had picked up the Scorpio on sensors and decided to engage. On the planet it had been fear of death, then of the men around her, of the uncertain future. Now she had a good idea of what the future held, and it was grief she battled. She missed her sisters, hated the circumstances that would separate them. It had been one thing to ship out with the GE, knowing she had the chance to go back one day. But this…it hurt. She wanted to be the one in control.

  The wall screen flicked on without warning. “Stand by,” a computerized voice informed her. “Prepare for transmission.” There was a long lag, long enough to make her shift uncomfortably. Would it go through?

  Chapter Twelve

  “Xera!” Her sister Gem’s face appeared. She looked older, eager to speak but worried. The GE must have briefed her on the situation. Xera wondered what they’d said. She also knew this conversation was probably being monitored by both sides. They wouldn’t take the chance of missing out on any information that might give them an advantage.

  No pressure, Xera thought wryly.

  “Sis,” Xera said, fighting the constriction in her throat. “Hi.”

  “We thought you were dead,” Gem said softly, as if she also had trouble speaking. “The GE said your ship was shot down. What happened? Are you all right?”

  Xera took a breath and sat up straight. “I’m getting married, sis. I promised I’d tell you. Check the message burst for details—I don’t know how long we have.”

  Gem’s eyes glittered with the tears she fought. “Are you happy about it?”

  How was Xera to answer that? There was so much she wanted to say, to confide, but there was no time. “He’s a good man. I think, given time, you might like him.”

  “He hasn’t hurt you?”

  Xera forced a smile. “I’m only hurting that I can’t see you again. I’m sorry, sis. I didn’t mean for it to end this way.”

  “It’s not ended! You’re still my sister,” Gem said fiercely. “If they won’t let you come home, I’ll find a way to come to you.”

  Alarmed, Xera said quickly, “No! You have a family. Even assuming you can find a craft, it’s an eight-month journey and a hostile border—you don’t belong here.”

  A muscle jumped in Gem’s jaw. “Then I’ll send Brandy.”

  “She’s married!”

  “Not anymore.”

  Confused—Brandy’s hasty marriage had been only months old when Xera was captured—Xera still protested. It was a nice thought, but the two of them were not known for playing well with each other. If Brandy showed up, there would soon be a war of galactic dimensions. Age had not mellowed them out. “Not if you love me, sis! You know I love her, but no.”

  Gem looked slightly cheered. “Your in de pendent streak is showing.”

  “Maybe I needed reminding of it,” Xera said, feeling grateful. She and her sibling might be very different, but it was good to draw strength from her family and she had needed this connection more than she could say. “Thank you, sis. I love you. Trust me. Believe in me.”

  “Done,” Gem said. “I…” The screen went blank.

  The communications computer attempted to reconnect, but it was useless. The beam had broken.

  Xera leaned her head back against her chair and closed her eyes. It was disappointing but okay. They’d said all that needed to be said. Gem would worry, but that was her nature as an older sister. Better she worry than grieve.

  As for Xera, she felt much better. Gem couldn’t have planned a better resolve booster than to threaten to send Brandy. A visit wouldn’t be terrible, but the chances were too great that she would get stuck with the girl. She couldn’t be an ambassador while bickering with her sibling. Who would take her seriously?

  A tone sounded at her chamber door. “Enter,” she called, and was surprised to see both Ryven and Namae come in.

  “I’m sorry to disturb you so soon. You are needed on the bridge,” Ryven informed her as his sister set to work repairing Xera’s makeup.

  Xera tried to keep eye contact with him in spite of Namae’s ministrations. “What’s up?”

  Ryven’s eyes glittered. “Your former captain is making accusations.”

  “Ah.” Xera sat still as she thought about that. “What’s he saying?”

  “He accuses you of treason, us of torture. He’s a pitiful little man.”

  Suddenly unsure, she frowned at him. “You didn’t, did you? Torture him?”

  He raised a brow. “He is intact.”

  She distrusted the gleam in his eye. It looked too much like satisfaction. “What did you do?”

  “Withheld pain medication and healing accelerators for his knee. He was allowed anesthetic for the operation on it, however—mostly for the comfort of the attending surgeon.”

  She sighed. Scorpio justice was rough stuff. “What about the others?”

  “Also intact. They were interrogated, but not with force. We have other means.”

  She grunted, glad he didn’t elaborate. There were some pathways her mind just didn’t need to wander. “They’re looking for a scapegoat, then.”

  “What?”

  “Someone to blame,” she translated, rising from her chair. “Let’s see if we can head this off.”
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br />   He waited until they were in the hallway to ask, “Would she really send your sister?”

  She looked at him, silently acknowledging what she had assumed: her conversation with Gem had been far from private, with both sides listening in. “You’d better hope not—Brandy can be a terror underfoot.”

  He considered her thoughtfully. “My brother is yet unwed.”

  A crack of laughter surprised her. “Don’t wish that on him! What ever sins he’s committed, he doesn’t deserve that.”

  Ryven frowned at her words, but she didn’t care. He had no idea. She elaborated, “Brandy is moody, solitary and cranky. I think it’s her frustrated mothering instinct that bothers her. She ran off and got married a few months ago, and now it seems she’s not. I don’t know if the guy got scared and ran off or what, but one crisis at a time is enough. Let’s see what our good captain has to say, why don’t we?”

  He had quite a lot, as it happened.

  Captain Khan’s image on the screen was pale. As a concession to his injury, he was seated in a wheelchair. New lines were deeply etched around his mouth and eyes, lines of pain and hatred. That hatred was focused on Xera as she entered the bridge. Immediately he launched into a snarled tirade. “You—”

  His words were abruptly cut off. They could see the commander to whom they’d first spoken reprimanding Khan, but they could not hear the words. There was a great deal of gesturing and flying spittle on Khan’s part, though.

  Little man syndrome. The thought flashed through Xera’s head and she had to clamp down on a smile that could wreak havoc if seen. Any hint of mockery on her part might rile the GE, and they didn’t need that. She could feel Ryven’s deadly focus as he moved subtly closer to her. For his sake, she was glad Khan wasn’t here in person—he would be dead. Ryven had no qualms about covering his hands with blood. She didn’t share his sentiments.

  Finally Khan calmed down. His fists were clenched, but his posture was more subdued as his commander reactivated the sound. “In light of his emotional investment in the proceedings, I will speak for Captain Khan. He has accused the former Lieutenant Harris-daughter of treason.” He glanced down, consulting his notes. “He claims the Lieutenant seduced the alien leader.” He glanced up, “That would be you, Commander Atarus—in order to save her own life. He further claims that she shared information with you and assisted in the capture of his crew. Several of his crew members agree this is true. Furthermore, they report that the Lieutenant was already known for her ‘sexually generous nature.’”

  “Have they been isolated and individually questioned?” Ryven inquired calmly. His coolness was strange in the face of the charges, almost as if he knew more than he was saying. “You’ll see the conflict in their testimonies soon enough if you do.

  “As for the claim of my seduction…” His mouth tipped up. “You may be interested to note that my bride is still a virgin, as any physician could tell on the slightest of examinations. We anticipated this line of questioning and took steps to preserve the…evidence.”

  The commander looked taken aback, but it was nothing to Xera’s chagrin. She couldn’t help staring at Ryven. He quietly touched her shoulder as he informed the commander, “With my bride’s permission, you may send a medic to confirm the truth. I will guarantee their safe return if you do. Of course, we will demand the satisfaction of the captain’s execution in return, along with his lying crewmen.”

  “That’s a freaking lie!” Captain Khan snarled. “You’re no more a virgin than—” His portion of the screen suddenly went dark.

  The commander looked strained. “We will get back to you on that. Excuse me.” The screen went blank.

  Even Xera was surprised by the abruptness, but it didn’t stop her from glaring at Ryven.

  He looked innocently at her. “You’d have suggested the same if you’d thought of it first.”

  Her eyes narrowed. “Then you weren’t really planning this all along?”

  He looked at her patronizingly, but his answer was soft, for her ears only. “You’ve been in my bed, woman. Do you think I would bother to save any evidence for him? I waited for you—no one else.”

  She relaxed under his reassuring gaze. “You know, for an alien, you’re a rather nice guy.”

  He smirked. “One who’s planning to bed you thoroughly at the very soonest convenience.”

  She flushed, understanding that this was now a matter of pride as well as desire. No man liked to admit publicly that his wife was untouched. Even for the best cause, that had to chafe.

  “Do you think they’ll accept the invitation?” Ryven asked.

  She laughed without humor. “I doubt it. My guess is that they’ll try to wiggle out with some diplomatic maneuver. The GE isn’t much into beheading these days. If anything, they’ll court martial him. He would be demoted and jailed.”

  “I should have gutted him when I had the chance.”

  She couldn’t help a smile. “Barbarian.”

  “Efficient,” he countered.

  “Ruthless,” she added, just to see his eyes glitter.

  He bent closer to murmur, “You will soon see how much.”

  Invisible flames licked her, and she shivered.

  It took over an hour, but the commander finally contacted them. He looked grim. “In light of further investigation, we have decided to dismiss Captain Khan’s accusations. It seems his testimony conflicts with that of several of his crewmen. The lieutenant’s…medical examination won’t be required. The captain aside, none of us here in command are interested in questioning her honor.”

  “Very wise,” Ryven’s father commented, speaking up for the first time in a while. “I suggest we take a recess from our discussions. If there is nothing urgent, we will recommence in twelve hours.”

  Fatigue set in as the tension drained from Xera. She glanced at her husband—or soon-to-be husband, or what ever he truly was—and saw him nod at the lord governor. “We will retire, then. Rest well.” He linked arms with her and escorted her from the bridge.

  Their masks of unaffectedness did not last past their stateroom door. Ryven cupped her jaw in his hand. He and Xera simply breathed, simply existed as their tension drained away. After a short period of relaxation, however, Xera grew restless.

  She stirred. “How do you do that? Calm me that way?”

  He nuzzled her temple. “It’s a talent,” he whispered. “Like so very many other things you have yet to enjoy.” He kissed her, demonstrating another. This one left her breathless. He kept his touches light, teased her until she made a sound of impatience and attacked his mouth. He laughed and took over the kiss, ramped up the heat, the seriousness, until the laughter died in flame and passion.

  They were too raw to take it slowly. She’d been hurt; he hurt for her. This demanded a vengeance that found its expression in the bedroom. They were both more clothed than not when he mounted her, took the virginity with which he’d taunted the captain.

  The first act of love in a woman’s life is never comfortable—there is pain, and very little stars and comets, despite what the poets say. There was desire, yes, but they unwittingly turned the act itself into an expression of violence. It was an act of pride for him, pride of the conqueror taking his rightful due, with little memory of how much he wanted the woman herself.

  Xera was…not herself. Her sister’s call, the accusations, the reminder of her status—they all were too much. No matter that she could now put “beloved” in front of “war prize,” a new rebellion was born in her heart. A shell of anger formed around the new hurts and focused on the nearest target. She was glad and sorry when he reared above her with a cry. She waited a moment as he lay there, supported by his elbows on either side, and then subtly nudged him off.

  He glanced at her and moved away when he saw her wince. “I’m sorry.”

  “I need to clean up,” she growled as she slid off the bed. That should have been his first incontrovertible indication that something was wrong. Before he might ha
ve been excused for thinking it was merely the loss of her innocence that disturbed her. His judgment was understandably clouded.

  The bathrooms on the warship were tiny, little more than closets, even for those of rank. Xera forced herself to be strong as she cleaned herself. The tears were too close. Rage shimmered just under her skin. But if she lost it in front of him, he would insist on trying to talk, and she wasn’t ready to be that naked in front of him.

  She looked in the mirror, saw her glittering eyes and hard mouth, and knew he’d never believe she was all right. Lying wasn’t an option, but strength might get her what she needed. “Be strong,” she hissed to herself, showing her teeth. “Be strong.”

  “Xera?” Ryven’s quiet voice came through the door, very close.

  She took a breath and opened it. “I need some time alone.” She had never seen him look solemn. It disturbed her.

  Those brimstone eyes moved over her face, took in the tension of her body. A hint of sadness entered his gaze. Slowly, gently, he raised a hand and touched the curve where her neck met her shoulder. He did nothing else, simply let the moment be.

  Slowly, the absence of pressure caused her shoulders to loosen. Bewildered, she stared at his chest, unable to understand why. He wasn’t forcing her, wasn’t demanding. He simply stood there and offered silent support. Without the touch, the moment couldn’t have drained her resistance, stolen away her anger. With it, only moments passed until tears gathered in her eyes, tears of relief and sorrow. She didn’t want him to go, didn’t want him to take his comforting presence away. She stepped close and wrapped her arms around him on a sob.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Her new husband made a low humming noise as he gathered her close. “Azie hiri’ami.” My sweetheart. “I was a boor with you.”

  Xera shook her head against his chest. The insignia on his chest scratched. “We were both stupid. Maybe there is no best time.”

  He sighed and picked her up in his arms so that her feet dangled in the air. “Whenever these things go wrong, it is the man’s fault.” His eyes crinkled. “My sisters say it is so.”