After the End

by Bonnie Dee

  The others tried to convince her of the wisdom of staying with the group.

  "I've got my family in Queens, my wife and my little girls. You think I don't want to get to them? But there ain't no way," Hector said.

  "Because it's clear across the city and over the bridge. But Julie's only a few blocks away," Deb argued.

  "We should find someone in authority. There must be patrolling police or even soldiers," Ann said. "There's probably someplace they're sending everyone to keep them safe."

  "Like the Astrodome after Katrina? What a great idea," Deb scoffed.

  Derrick loudly pressed for a trip to Best Buy, while Ronnie whined about wanting her mommy, the poor kid. The clamor of voices grew as everyone expressed an opinion about what they should do, where they should go or told about the loved ones they needed to reach. Their bickering voices rose above the continuing static of the radio.

  Lila wanted to retreat someplace absolutely silent, wrap her arms around herself and rock until this bad dream was over. She looked at Ari, who'd walked away from the group to sit on the floor and lean against a shelving unit displaying fishing rods. Resting his arms on his knees, he closed his eyes. She studied his strong jaw, his full lips pressed grimly tight and the spatters of blood on his olive drab T-shirt. God, what he'd had to do to that thing in the subway and no one had even remembered to thank him for it.

  She went over and sat beside him, offering a bottle of water from her tote bag. "Here."

  He opened his eyes and accepted the bottle. "Thanks." He uncapped and drank deeply, his Adam's apple bobbing with each swallow.

  A little flutter of heat in her belly made Lila look away. It was so wrong to be attracted to a stranger while her loved ones and maybe the entire world was in jeopardy. She gazed at the industrial green carpet on the floor. "So, how are you doing?"

  "Fine. You?"

  "Holding up." Unable to think of anything to say, she was glad to sit in silence for a few minutes. Finally, she spoke again. "Hey, thanks for what you did, killing that thing. It must've been hard."

  He shrugged. "Had to be done."

  "No one else was brave enough to do it. How long have you been in the army?"

  His smile was a tight grimace. "Three months. I'm home on leave from BCT. I'm supposed to leave for Arizona next week for AIT."

  Lila wrinkled her nose at all the military acronyms. "Why does all that mean?"

  "Basic combat training is the same for everyone," he explained. "After that you go for advanced training in different places. At FortHuachuca I'd be learning intelligence gathering techniques."

  Torture training? Lila wondered but didn't ask.

  Ari gave back the nearly empty bottle. "What about you? Where were you going when this happened?"

  "Classes at NYU." She thought of her professors and other students and wondered what they were all doing. Had anyone made it to class today?

  "What's your major?" he asked the obligatory question as if they were making small talk at some party.

  "Undeclared. I'm in the Liberal Studies course at the College of Arts and Sciences. Pretty soon I'll have to decide on a field of study." Two years into the program and she still wasn't certain what that field would be.

  Then she realized it probably didn't matter any more. Here she spoke of the future as if everything was normal, but they now lived in a world overrun by zombies. In a few brief moments, between taking a ride to school and the train coming to an abrupt halt, the world had changed, and along with it, her perception of how the universe worked. She'd believed life was life and death was death with little overlap besides an occasional near death experience. Now she would never be the same. None of them would be.

  Lila looked at Ari and lowered her voice. "Are you scared? Cause you don't act scared."

  A real smile flashed across his mouth and he gave a sharp bark of a laugh. "Am I scared? Good question."

  * * * * *

  Chapter Five

  He was numb and his stomach felt sour and sick like the morning after a night of partying but without any of the fun of getting drunk. Was he scared? He was beyond it, running on pure adrenalin and instinct. Even as he'd demonstrated how to load and fire a rifle or searched for a radio or gathered supplies his brain had replayed killing the zombie over and over. He felt the jolt of the pole in his hands as it hit the thing's body, the yielding flesh when he tried to impale the neck and, worst of all, the sensation of sawing through flesh and bone with the too blunt edge of the metal shelf. Beyond afraid, beyond horrified, he was fucking traumatized.

  "I've had better days," he said dryly.

  Lila smiled, a little quirk of her lips that brought out a dimple in one cheek. "Yeah, me too. If you'd asked me earlier in the day, I would've said last night was about the worst experience I'd gone through in my life. This kind of puts it in perspective."

  "Why, what happened last night?"

  "I broke up with my boyfriend of two years, and I thought it would go better than it did. He's usually a calm guy, but he was upset to say the least." She shook her head and her bangs fell over her eyes. She absently pushed them back, a gesture he was becoming familiar with. Ari wanted offer her a barrette or something.

  "Anyway, it was an ugly scene," she continued. "I was feeling pretty crappy about it on the train right before all hell broke loose."

  "Hell on earth," he murmured, leaning his head back against the cool metal display rack and watching the others' faces as they argued. "Have to say, it's more fun fighting zombies in a video game than in real life."

  "What you had to do must've been awful." A frown puckered her brows, and the strands of hair she'd pushed back fell forward again. He longed to brush them out of her eyes that were a deep shade of blue that almost bordered on purple.

  "Yeah, well, we all might have to be ready to kill the way things are shaping up," he answered gruffly.

  "I don't even squash bugs when I find them indoors. I take them outside and let them go."

  "These aren't bugs. They're not even really alive. I think you can feel justified in putting them out of their misery. If those bodies' real owners were still alive, they'd thank you for it."

  "I suppose you're right." Lila smiled briefly and the dimple in her cheek flashed again. "Some brave new world, huh?"

  She rested her chin on her drawn up knees, silent for a moment before she added, "I'm worried about my ex. It sounded like the hospital is overrun."

  "My mom works there, too and I haven't been able to reach her. I know how Deb feels. I want to go to her, but I guess we're all stuck with each other for a while." Ari thought he could probably make it on his own if they all split up, but some of the others would be helpless. It wouldn't be right to ditch them.

  "Guess so." Lila exhaled and started to climb to her feet. "And I guess we need to be a part of this." She nodded toward the escalating argument. "We're going to have to make some decisions and it's probably better if everyone's not yelling at each other—especially since they're all armed."

  What he wouldn't give to be back at training camp with someone barking out orders all he had to do was follow. He followed Lila back toward the others.

  "Hey," he said, and when everyone continued to loudly promote his or her own agenda, he repeated more sharply, "Hey! Listen."

  They all fell silent and looked toward him. Joe turned down the volume on the static-filled radio.

  "No one has to stay here against their will so if you want to go so badly, Deb, you should, but I believe we're safer staying together. We can find a way to accommodate what everybody wants to do. Derrick, you want a laptop? That's a good idea and we'll try to get one and food, too. Many of you are anxious to get home to your families. Let's talk about the geography of that, keeping in mind you'll probably have to walk all the way. Then there's the idea of trying to find some military personnel to evacuate us from the city."

  He drew a breath, hoping he'd covered all their concerns and made them feel "heard" because now he was
about to shoot them down. "The problem is it's dangerous out there and we're on foot. Some of us might not be able to run fast enough if we had to, especially after what we've already been through." He indicated Ronnie with a flick of his gaze. "To me, it makes the most sense to spend the night here where we're fairly safe. In the morning, after we've all had a chance to rest, we can reassess the situation. Meanwhile, we'll send out a party for supplies, but the majority of the group should wait here."

  There were murmurs of agreement and he felt a surge of relief that there wasn't going to be any contention, then Deb spoke up.

  "I hear what you're saying and I appreciate the logic, but I'm going." She slung a rifle onto her shoulder. "I'm going now. If I can, I'll come back here with Julie and whatever news I find out."

  No one tried to persuade her anymore. Her determined face stopped their attempts. Lila said, "good luck" and Ann murmured, "be careful" as they watched Deb walk to the front of the store and check the street through the display window. She let herself out the front door, and Lila went to lock it behind her then stood, watching her disappear down the street.

  Ari felt like he'd lost one. At the same time he wished he could take off like that, too, but a glance around at the faces of the remaining members of their group reminded him why he couldn't. He didn't know quite why he felt a sense of personal responsibility for their wellbeing, but he couldn't seem to shrug it off much as he'd like to.

  Lila came back over from the door. "What now?"

  Ari thought about a course of action. "There should be a guard at the window, keeping watch. We'll take turns. There's no way to recharge our cell phones so we shouldn't use them except to periodically try to reach 911. Derrick, you and I will go for supplies. I saw a grocery store farther down the block, and a rent-to-own place where you can get computer supplies." He wanted Derrick along because the kid knew what he needed. Ari wasn't computer ignorant, but knew more about cruising the internet than actually setting up systems.

  "If you meet other people, you could bring them back here. There's safety in numbers." Ann's long fingers fiddled nervously with her bracelet. "Maybe you'll even find a policeman who can tell us what to do?"

  "Maybe," Ari agreed, but he thought the cops were as clueless as anyone else, and he hesitated to expand their group by too many. The smaller the team the better the organization. Right now, despite they fact they were practically strangers, Ari felt he had a handle on who everyone was and what to expect from them. So far, no one had lost their cool too badly. Add in a wild card, someone unstable or abrasive and the group dynamic would shift.

  "They say the first stage of a crisis is the most dangerous," he continued. "After things settle down is the time to make a move."

  "There should be enough camp beds and sleeping bags for all of us here. We'll set up camp while you're gone." Lila supported him and he was grateful for it.

  "I'll keep first watch," Joe volunteered.

  "I want to go with you," Hector announced. "I'm a good shot and I can't stand waiting around any more. I wanna see what's happening out there."

  Ari thought he could move faster with only him and Derrick, but Hector might prove useful. At least the guy could shoot. Likely the only shooting Derrick had done was with an X-box controller. "Okay," he agreed.

  They checked their gear. With a rifle strapped to his back, a skinning knife in a holster by his side and another semi-automatic in hand, Ari figured he was as ready as he'd ever be. Hector also had his rifle held ready for use and Derrick held several empty backpacks to carry their loot.

  Joe opened the door and locked it behind them after they'd stepped out onto the sidewalk. Even with sunglasses on, the outdoors seemed bright after the dimness of the store. Ari squinted down the street with its jumbled cars and nearly empty sidewalks. Such quiet stillness in the middle of the day on a city street was weird and unsettling. There were sirens in the distance and some traffic noise, also a helicopter off to the south, but overall the impression of desertion and silence rested like a muffling quilt over the city.

  Pieces of the man who'd broken through the window earlier lay among the shattered glass in front of that building. There were other broken bodies here and there, but no living people in sight. Then in the distance, several blocks away, Ari saw people moving. He raised his binoculars to see if they were living or zombie. Several figures darted quickly down the sidewalk and around the corner. They were living humans. He'd already become familiar with the jerky gait of zombies, like marionettes operated by an amateur puppeteer. That should make them easy to outrun, yet the creatures seemed to be doing a pretty good job of attacking and killing people. They weren't slow, merely awkward

  "This is freaky." Hector, walking on Ari's left, echoed his thought. The man's white knuckle grip on his rifle and his darting gaze made Ari a little nervous. It was good to be alert and vigilant, but not so good if the guy snapped and started shooting randomly.

  They reached a mom & pop grocery which had caught Ari's eye earlier. Iron grates covered the display windows. The door was locked. Frustrated, Ari jerked on the door for a few seconds then began to beat at the lock with the butt of his rifle. A flurry of movement inside the store stopped his assault and a moment later the door opened a few inches. Dark eyes peered through the gap. "What do you want?"

  "Groceries," Ari kept the duh to himself. He held his rifle in one hand and held up his free hand, palm open to show his harmless intent. "Just groceries. That's all. There's a group of us. We need supplies."

  A woman's voice speaking in Korean came from behind the man in the doorway, a rapid-fire patter of either fear or anger. The storekeeper muttered a sharp comment and opened the door a little farther. "Hurry up. Come in."

  Derrick and Hector entered first while Ari scanned the street one last time, then he followed them into the store. With its shuttered windows, the interior was even darker than the sporting goods store. But Ari noted the hum of a small generator which was keeping the refrigerated cases cool. A woman with her black hair in a loose ponytail stood behind the counter, staring at them. Beside her was an older man with white shot hair pointing a pistol at them.

  The younger man who'd answered the door also had a hand gun. He let them see it, but didn't hold it on them. He bobbed his head in greeting. "Any news about what's going on?"

  "Zombies," Derrick piped up and Ari cringed at the word, which still sounded preposterous. "They've overrun the city, and from what we heard on the radio, the rest of the country is under attack, too."

  One dark eyebrow shot up. "Zombies?"

  "Take a look around, man. Do you have a better explanation?"

  "A virus or some other disease infecting people. Maybe a terrorist chemical attack that hits the nervous system and makes people go crazy. But zombies? Come on." The man holstered his gun. Ari noticed the old man behind the counter didn't.

  "That's what I said," Hector added. "A virus."

  The store owner nodded toward the shelves. "Go ahead and get what you need, but we're accepting cash only today."

  "Are you kidding me?" Hector's voice rose. "We're in a crisis and you're worried about money?"

  The man exchanged glances with his family members behind the counter. The old man rattled off some more Korean. The muzzle of his gun never faltered, remaining trained on the customers.

  The younger guy frowned. "I don't want trouble, but we can't just give stuff away."

  "I've only got about twenty bucks." Ari cursed himself for not collecting cash from the others. It hadn't even occurred to him.

  "I don't have anything," Derrick said. "I left my wallet in my jacket pocket and my jacket's with my sister."

  Grumbling in Spanish, Hector fished in his pocket and pulled out a few crumpled bills. "I was going to cash my paycheck at the bank so all I've got is this."

  Ari mentally added up all the food they'd need to feed the group, not only for tonight but possibly for several meals more. A little over twenty bucks wasn't going to cut i
t. "I'll make you a deal." He set his rifle down, leaning it against a shelving unit, and took the spare rifle off his back. "A trade. You give us supplies. We give you this rifle. Trust me, you're gonna need more protection than a couple of handguns can provide."

  "You have to sever the heads from the spinal cord," Derrick added a helpful tip, "either cut them off or shoot through the back of the neck. Head shots don't work. They'll just keep coming."

  The store owner accepted the weapon, examined it, and nodded without conferring with his father this time. "All right. Take what you need."

  Ari collected perishables from the coolers first. He had a feeling before this was over they'd be eating a lot of canned foods. As he packed the items into one of the knapsacks, Ari asked, "How long ago did this start happening?" He wanted to know if the timing coincided with the attack on the subway.

  "A few hours, I heard a car crash outside and my wife called 911," the man said. "It didn't take long to figure out there was something more than an accident happening. The power went out and people were running and screaming. I locked down the shop right away and we've been in here ever since."

  "Mama!" a child's voice called from the back room. The woman murmured something to her husband in Korean and left through the door behind the counter.

  "Where's the rest of your group?" the shopkeeper asked.

  "Down the street in the sporting goods shop. We were on the subway when it was attacked." Ari shoved a bag of apples into the nearly full knapsack.

  The man nodded. "The national guard or somebody has to come soon."

  "I don't know. Could be awhile." Ari zipped the bag and hefted the heavy weight onto his shoulders,. It was just as well he'd traded the extra rifle. He couldn't have carried it anyway. Also a good thing he'd spent hours training with a pack on his back during the past weeks.

  The man unlocked the door and Hector poked his head out. "Looks okay."

  He stepped outside and Derrick and Ari followed him.

  "Good luck," the store owner said as they walked past.