Soul Mate (Book One)

by Richard Crawford

  She looks a bit shaky when she comes out but I don't like to ask. I see her indoors and put the kettle on. When I come back with a cup of tea for her she's crying. Oh, Shit.

  I put the tea down on the table. "Is there anyone I can call for you?" It's all I can think of to say.

  She mops her eyes with a pink hankie. "No thank you, Tommy. I'll be fine." She smiles at me. "You should get going." She hands me a twenty-pound note. When I try to give it back she insists. "You've been so long you'll get into trouble.

  When I get back to the garage Ally's all set to blow a gasket. The twenty calms him down. But when I ask him if he knows if Mrs Stokes has any relatives he gives me a very strange look.

  I'm sitting on the sofa drinking a coke when Pete comes up to me again. He flops down beside me.

  "Hey, T."

  "Pete."

  We sit there for a minute and the silence is sort of awkward.

  "I've been talking to the guys," Pete says this sort of slow and I get a bad feeling. He bends down to retie his trainers and takes a moment to get back on track. "We've got room at the house, and we wondered if you wanted to stay with us?"

  At first I'm relieved that it's nothing bad. Then I'm more embarrassed than he is. I mumble, "Thanks, man, but I don't have the money for rent right now."

  "That's cool. It's only the floor or the sofa if you're lucky, but it's yours if you want it."

  "Yeah, thanks Pete." I don't know what to say but I think he understands. We shake on it.

  "Come round later, T. We'll sort it out."

  Ally yells and Pete lopes off to get a fare. I sit on the sofa sort of freaked out by how well things are going.

  The rest of the day goes all right. I get a dozen fares and I'm on track to have money for dinner. It won't be posh but I should do better than a bacon roll at Dave's kiosk. But there's something I have to do first so I head over to the covered market.

  Lucy grins when she sees me and says, "I knew the rose would do it."

  I grin back and say, "You were right."

  She comes up and gives me a hug. "Tell me what happened."

  I give her a version that sort of makes sense and tell her about the dinner date on Friday. "Here, my first repayment." I give her a fiver.

  She doesn't want to take it but she does. "I got something for you." She goes behind the stall and pulls out an Oxfam bag. She gives it to me. Inside are two nice shirts. I look at her and she says,

  "You can come round to the flat on Friday and get changed before the date."

  I know she's offering regardless of whether Richard will be there or not. I shake my head. "I've got some more good news." I tell her about Pete's offer.

  "Tom," she practically leaps on me and gives me a hug. She's more excited than I am. "I knew it would come right for you."

  I don't know what to say. "I'll pay you back." It's all I can think of but she just laughs. I have to ask, "Why d'you do this for me?" I sound like an idiot but the way things are going so right after going so wrong, I need to find a way to understand.

  "You're a good guy, Tom."

  I resist the urge to tell her she's wrong. But she knows me too well.

  She laughs. "Bad guys don't give their last penny to their mates or use it to buy flowers for anyone."

  I'm still not sure she's right. If you have a heart like Lucy I guess you see people a certain way. I do something really corny because I know she'll like it. I grab her hand and plant a kiss on it. "I owe you. Anything you want, just ask and that's for ever."

  She laughs and pushes me off. "Come by on Friday and I'll have something for you."

  ####

  Things keep going well for the next two days. I move in with the guys and sleep on the sofa. I can shower every morning and wash clothes in their machine. It makes me feel like a real person. They keep beer and stuff around the place. I can manage a beer without losing it, but I leave the beer alone. The guy's are cool with it.

  I'm saving money for the date with Suki but it's slow now I have other commitments. The deal is I buy my own food and chip in for the bills, when I have the money. I don't want to look as if I'm sponging so I make sure to give Pete what I can.

  On the third day Zach calls me into his office. I've been getting some looks off Ally so I'm not surprised. Things have been going too well, it couldn't last. But I haven't missed another day so I don't know what it's about. Zach looks normal, not furious or anything. I sit down and he asks,

  "How's it going, T?"

  "Great, really good."

  Zach nods and eyeballs me hard. I don't get a good feeling but I still can't think of anything I've done recently that would piss him off.

  "Mrs Stokes has taken quite a shine to you." Zach crosses his arms which given the size of his chest is a bit of an effort for him. "She always asks for you now."

  I nod, still not seeing where this is going.

  "Ally says she is giving you money over the odds."

  I start to understand. "Yeah, and I give it all to Ally. Every penny." I try hard not to be offended.

  "That's good, T." Zach uncrosses his arms and leans forward. "Some of these old ladies they don't have anyone. I have to be careful about this stuff."

  "I carried her shopping in. I waited while she was in the doctors." I know I sound defensive but I haven't done anything. I'm not the sort of sleaze that cons money out of old ladies.

  Zach isn't done. "You've been going to that nursing home on Carling Road. What's that about?"

  For a moment I'm too shocked to answer him. Then I get mad. "This is shit, Zach." I almost walk out on him, but I don't. I take a couple of breaths to calm down. "I've been to visit an old guy there a few times. I'm not trying to get money out of him. He's unconscious; he doesn't even know I'm there."

  "Is he a relative?"

  I wonder how to explain about Mr Edwards. I've been back a few times since Mrs Edward's ghost left. I feel sorry for the old boy and I figure after what happened he might like to hear my voice. I just say the sort of stuff she said. Really, I don't think he'll be around much longer.

  I still sign in as the nephew, John Horwood, so the home think I'm a relative. I don't want to get into that with Zach. I look him in the eye and say, "His wife was a friend of mine. She died a few weeks back."

  Zach doesn't let up on me straight off. He stays leaning forward giving me the hard look. Then he says, "Okay, T, I believe you." He leans back to show we're done.

  I'm at the door when he says, "You don't go back to Mrs Stokes anymore."

  The way he says it, it's not up for discussion. I don't argue. Mrs Stokes won't mind if it's someone else who carries her shopping. But I don't go straight back to the garage. I go out into the alley and walk a bit to calm down.

  It's not as if Zach's a saint. There's all sorts of shit goes on and I know that's why he needs to watch his rep. But I wonder why Ally would think I was doing a number on Mrs Stokes. I wonder who told him I'd been at St Andrew's. It creeps me out a bit. I don't like the idea of Ally and the guys thinking badly of me. This stupid job is about something more than Suki, having friends here actually means I have something to lose now.

  I keep my head down and get through the rest of the day all right. There's a bit of me wants to have it out with Ally, but it's too much of a risk. He's got a temper and I'm a bit afraid about what he's heard. I've been straight with him so it should work itself out. Or that's what I tell myself.

  I've brought Mickey's shirt, all washed and ironed, and I planned to take it round to him at the end of the day. I'm not in the mood for Max but I go anyway.

  I walk there thinking about what happened with Zach. There's nothing I can do. The thing with going to visit Mr Edwards, I guess it was a mistake. I shouldn't get involved with the ghosts' stuff. I never did anything like that before. I just felt a bit sorry for him because he seemed all alone and she was so worried for him. I don't like to think that someone would be better off dead. I know how that feels. But I'm surprised that
Mr E is still this side.

  When I reach the house I'm still wound up. I stand outside for a minute wondering if this is a good idea. If Max is there I'm in no mood for his shit. I'm just about to leave when a window opens and Mickey shouts down.

  "Hey, Tommy, is that you? Are you coming up?"

  "Yeah."

  Mickey buzzes me in and I head up the stairs. He comes out to meet me and he's bouncing round like a puppy.

  "Hey, dude, how's it going?"

  "Good." I can't muster up the same energy. "Here's your shirt back."

  I sit on the sofa while Mickey gets coffee. There's no sign of Max and I start to relax a bit.

  "So what's the news," Mickey asks.

  "I'm working for Zach on the rickshaws."

  "No shit, Tommy, that's great. How long?"

  "Couple of weeks."

  "Have you got somewhere to stay?"

  I tell him about the guys' house and about being on the rickshaws. He's stoked for me and I start to feel better. Mickey looks really well. He used to have this thing with his nerves and he's much calmer, I would wonder if he was on something but his eyes look okay and I figure he's just happy. We have a laugh talking about some of the stuff that happens on the rickshaws. In the end I can't keep it to myself and I tell him I've got a date with Suki. You'd think I'd asked him to be my best man he's so pleased.

  It's good to talk to him. Mickey understands what it's like when you're down and can't catch a break. Whatever happened he's always stuck by me. He never acts like you have to make up for stuff. That means a lot. And he's a good laugh; I guess I've sort of missed him.

  It goes well until Max arrives. He comes in the door and straight off looks at me daggers. He's dressed real smart but I get the feeling that he wasn't having a good day even before he came home and found me on his sofa. He stomps about. Mickey gets up and makes him coffee. I should leave but I like messing with Max.

  In the end Max sends Mickey off to fetch something for him. The moment Mickey's out the door Max says, "Get the fuck out, Tommy, and don't come back round here." He takes a breath and I can see he's really mad. "Mick's doing well. He doesn't need you messing things up."

  "I brought his shirt back," I say it real nice and reasonable. It's not as if Mickey and I used to drink together or anything. Booze was never Mickey's thing. I stand up because I get the feeling that if I don't Max is going to lose it. This doesn't make sense. I've never done anything that bad he should be like this. Except for what happened with Danny. But I don't know how Max would know about that.

  I have to pass him to get to the door and for a moment it looks as if he's going to grab me and make his point in a non verbal manner. I tense up ready. After the day I've had, if he gives it out he's getting it back. We both hear the sound of feet on the stairs. Max backs off. I head for the door. I give Mickey a wave as I go past, but I don't say anything.

  "Tommy, what's up dude?"

  I ignore him and keep going.

  Tomorrow is my date with Suki. I'm hoping it's going to go off better than today.

  Chapter Twelve

  Somehow I get through the day without messing anything up. It feels like a miracle after yesterday.

  Mostly what happened yesterday wasn't my fault, but I feel bad about running out on Mickey and for winding Max up, even though he started it. I don't even know why Max got angry. But Max's helping Mickey out; Mick deserves a break and I don't want to do anything to screw that up.

  So I'm glad when the day's over, with no ghosts to mess things up.

  I head through the park on my way to the boat. After work, I went to see Lucy and she gave me another rose. As far as Lucy's concerned, flowers will sort everything. I can't argue with her. I told her I'd pay her back, but she said just to make sure we invited her to the wedding. That freaked me out. I must've just stood there with my mouth hanging open until she started laughing at me. She howled so loud everyone was staring at us. I suppose it was sort of funny, if you have a twisted sense of humour. But my plan is to get Suki to forgive me; I know better than to look too far into the future.

  I can't remember if we agreed a time so it's best to get there early, and look as reliable as possible. The boat's all locked up. The old deckchair is by the towpath so I sit down. The towpath is covered in purple and pink flowers. I guess they're weeds but they look pretty. I settle back in the sun, feeling good that I got here in one piece with money in my pocket and everything OK. When I hear someone coming I look up and smile like an idiot. The smile fades real quick. Suddenly I'm not feeling so good.

  "Hi, Jess." I say, trying to sound like I'm a little bit pleased to see her.

  "Tommy," she nods at me. After she's locked up her bike, she unlocks the boat and disappears inside. A few minutes later she pokes her head out. "Do you want to come in for a coffee?"

  The answer to that would be no. But it only takes a moment to realise I can't actually say no. We go inside and she offers me coffee. I wonder if it's poisoned or spiked. How far would she go to screw me and Suki up? I take the coffee, sit down on the sofa, put the rose down beside me, and tell myself to stop being paranoid. But it's hard round this girl.

  Jess is wearing all black as usual. Her short hair is spiked up and her necklace looks as if it's made from barbed wire. I can't imagine anyone ever getting close to this girl. She picks up the tarot cards and shuffles them. When she offers them to me, I'm ready and just shake my head. "No thanks."

  "So, Tommy, that stuff, blaming the drinking on ghosts, what was that about?"

  "I screwed up. It was just a stupid excuse."

  She nods. "I think it's good to be honest." There's something sarky about the way she says it that I don't like. She's still fiddling with the damn cards. They she says, "And you won't touch the cards because you don't believe in paranormal stuff, right?"

  "Yeah."

  She sounds reasonable, but it feels like I'm being pinned down by sniper fire. Any moment she's going to pick me off, a bullet between the eyes. Game over.

  She starts laying the cards out. I hold the coffee but don't drink. I'm wishing I'd never come inside but there's no escape now.

  "Honesty is the only option," she says. "Nothing stays secret for ever." Her voice is heavy with the sarky tone. "And liars never prosper." She's still laying out the cards. I wonder what they are telling her. I keep quiet and wait to see if she has any other homilies to deliver.

  She looks up and gives me a friendly but creepy smile. "One thing Suki won't put up with is someone who holds out on her; someone who lies; someone who doesn't trust her. There's nothing worse than someone betraying your trust, don't you think?"

  Now I wish she'd go back to generalizations. She's subtle as a sledgehammer. When she looks up her blue eyes are hard as porcelain. What is it with her? I was nervous to start with. Between the cards and her going on and on, she's got me even more wound up. When she leaves a silence, I fall into it like an idiot. "I tried to explain…." I shut up quick, but it's too late, I've already been suckered.

  She puts the cards down and pins me with her flat blue gaze. "Sounds like a guilty conscience. What are you holding out on, Tommy?"

  "Nothing."

  There's something about her eyes. I can't look away.

  She says, "Thing is, that stuff with the ghosts, there's something weird with you, I can sense it."

  I'm not surprised. There is something weird about her. I feel it, like to like, I suppose, same as with Suki. But Suki has this nice vibe and Jess has this other thing. She's waiting so I shake my head. My only hope is to shut up until Suki rescues me. Then I get a horrible thought. I remember that first night. "Is this another setup?"

  She goes back to the tarot cards. "Sort of."

  It's like I've been punched.

  "Suki says you're all right. I'm not so sure. I can see there's something between the two of you. But that doesn't make you a good guy."

  She's right but that doesn't make me feel any better. Why is it her business? I
wonder what the deal is between her and Suki. The way Jess talks it's as if they're some sort of team. She glances up and it's as if she's read my thoughts.

  "There's a lot of bad stuff out there." She shrugs towards the outside world. "Suki and me, we look out for each other. Watch each other's backs. Usually we both know by now." When I just stare at her, she goes on. "Suki likes to help, she gets a sense for good. I' more likely to pick up on bad. It's more complicated than that, but it works; between us we don't usually make mistakes." She glares at me. "No one's screwed the system quite like you."

  "Oh" I wonder why they need a system. I'm sort of losing it, thinking of witches and covens and other shit. There is something scary weird about Jess.

  She's still giving me that look as she says, "You tell her the truth tonight or I'll make sure you don't get another chance."

  I'm not sure if she's setting me up but she's got me on the ropes and I give in and say, "It didn't go so well last time?" It's half a question.

  "You could ask her about that."

  I suppose it's good advice. I know there's no hiding from this. Eventually the ghosts are going to come back for more than a morning. And there's Danny.

  "Okay," I say. Even if she is screwing with me I don't have a choice. Jess nods once and then starts working on her jewellery. The coffee has gone cold; I put it aside and just sit there staring at the floor. I was looking forward to dinner but now it's like waiting for judgement day.

  It's quiet for a while then Jess says, "Tell the truth. Prove you're a good guy and I won't hassle you anymore, Tommy."

  It's the nicest thing she's said to me. But I don't feel any better. I'm not sure I can claim to be a good guy and I'm realising that, between these two, eventually the truth is going to come out.

  Jess goes back to her cards and I just sit there holding the rose. Five minutes later Suki comes in. She stands in the kitchen and looks from Jess to me and back to Jess again. It's all a bit tense then Jess says,