Soul Mate (Book One)

by Richard Crawford

  We sit there for a bit and I'm wondering if I should go. I'm relieved about Mick, but the vibe with Max is weird and his hint to fuck off wasn't that subtle.

  After a while I say, "I'm sorry." I don't like apologising to him but I do it anyway. For Mick.

  "What happened, Tommy?"

  I should be expecting this, but I'm not ready. It's the first time I've spoken about it since the cops interviewed me. But I don't want to give it to him like that. I tell him a shorter version, at the end I don't know what to say. "He should've run." I shake my head. "I don't know why he didn't run."

  Max looks at me as if I'm an idiot. "I suppose you would've run if it had been him in trouble?" He keeps looking at me as if it's really a question and I start to get a bit insulted. When I don't answer he says, "I told him, over and over, that you were bad news but he wouldn't listen."

  "It's not like I had a choice," I say. "I didn't go looking for it, Max. What happened to Mick, it was the last thing I wanted."

  The lady on reception shoots me a dirty look. I guess I was a bit loud. It's getting late and I need to get back for Suki. "I'm sorry," I say again. It's all I've got. "I'll come by later but if you see him…"

  He doesn't look up and I leave him sitting by the potted plant.

  ####

  When I get back to the boat Suki's already there. She's in the kitchen making sandwiches. Jess is sitting on the sofa finishing left over Chinese out of the carton.

  "How is he?" Suki asks.

  "A bit better. They might move him to a ward later." She's attacking the bread pretty fierce. I'm sensing a bit of an atmosphere. I nod at Jess and sit down at the table, taking care not to touch her stuff. "Max's still there. I said I'd go back later." Suki just nods. There's definitely something going on. I don't like the silence so I say, "Max is a spooky guy. It's good he looks out for Mick but," I'm not sure where I'm going with this. "He acts like he's his mother or something."

  Suki puts the bread knife down. "They're a couple, Tommy." She sounds sort of aggravated. She raises her eyes at Jess. "I'm going to get the car. You think this is a bad idea so I'll let you tell him and explain why."

  I'm too busy grappling with what she said about Mickey and Max to pay attention. When it sinks in it makes sense of a lot of things. I'm sort of glad for Mick but I feel like a right idiot. He should have told me. But, Max, for fuck's sake. By then Suki's nearly out the door.

  "Why what?" I ask.

  "Jess will tell you," Suki snaps. "Then you can make up your own mind. But I don't see that you have too many options." I think this last bit is aimed at Jess. Then she's gone.

  Jess scrapes around in the Chinese carton for a while and I get stressed. Why is everyone so weird?

  "What's that about? Have you two been rowing?"

  Jess shrugs. "She wants you to go see her mum this afternoon."

  "Oh," I'm not sure what to make of this. "Are we dating?"

  "Don't be a jerk." She looks up and sees my face. "Sorry, forgot you didn't know." She doesn't sound sorry, she sounds as if she's making a point. "Suki's mum is a powerful medium. It's a family gift. Suke thinks her mum can help you."

  Suki never talks about her mum so this is all pretty weird. I try to work out what's going on. "But you don't?"

  "Oh, Anna can help you. But I don't think she will. You'll just get stuck in the middle of something."

  I wish she'd just straight out tell me what's what. "Why?"

  "She doesn't have anything to do with the gift anymore. She's strict about it since Suke was a teenager, hates it when she gets involved with anything paranormal." Jess puts the carton aside. "If you go you need to be careful of her, Tommy. She won't want you round Suki."

  "Why not?"

  "Because of the ghosts, idiot." She doesn't say it too nasty. "You're her worse nightmare."

  "What?"

  "The stuff that's happening to you is wild. It's powerful, unexplained and probably dangerous. She won't want to be round that and she won't want Suki round it."

  I think of the other night. I think of Mickey. "I guess that's fair enough. So why does Suki think I should go and see her?"

  Jess ponders this for longer than seems necessary. "Because her mum's one of the few people who might be able to help you work this out."

  I get the feeling there's more to this. I notice she doesn't say Suki's mum can make it go away. "So you really think I shouldn't go?" I can't see how that would work if Suki's so dead set on going, but I ask anyway.

  "No, you should go. Suki's right. People are getting hurt. You have to do something." She hesitates. "But you need to watch out for yourself. Anna is," she hesitates again. "A hard lady. She'll do whatever suits her purposes. And she has one purpose, and it's more of an obsession, keeping Suke away from anything to do with the gift."

  I'm thinking that from Jess this is pretty scary. "But if it's what Suki wants, I don't have a choice, right?"

  She nods once. "It's what Suki wants." I think she's going to say something else but she gets up and throws the carton in the bin. After that she bangs around in the kitchen for a bit and it looks like we're done with the advice, but then she says, "You should know they've had an ongoing battle about this stuff for years. It's screwed things up between them. Anna's got a real thing about keeping Suke away from it. She doesn't even like her being around me."

  I don't even think of getting a shot in. I just nod and wonder what the hell to make of it all. "What do I do?"

  Jess shrugs. "See how it goes. If she'll help it will be worth it. But don't expect her to give you a warm welcome."

  I nearly make a crack about warm welcomes.

  She smiles as if she knows what I'm thinking. "Tommy, you have no bloody idea."

  It's not long before Suki comes back to collect me and the sandwiches. Now I'm paying attention I can tell she is really wound up about this. But something tells me she's also expecting to get her way.

  She comes in the door, looks at me, and says, "Well?"

  "I'm coming." I shoot a quick look at Jess. She gives me a little nod. For a moment I wish she was coming with us. Like suddenly she's the safe one, but that's too weird. I must be losing it.

  "Come on then." Suki shoves the sandwiches and cans of Pepsi in a carrier bag and disappears.

  I follow but for some reason I stop at the door and look back at Jess.

  It's as if she's waiting for me to ask her something. When I don't, she almost smiles at me and says, "Take care, T."

  The car is parked on the main road by the bridge. It's a sleek, black BMW. When I see it, I just know it has to be Simon's. It's like he's rubbing my face in it and he's not even here. I stare at it and wonder what Suki would say if I suggested we catch the bus instead. But she's already in the driver's seat buckling her seat belt.

  "Hurry up and get in." She's parked on double yellow lines and busy checking her mirrors for traffic wardens. I don't mind the thought of Simon getting a ticket but I get in. It's all cream leather and air freshener, not a scrap of dust or clutter. Suki shoves the carrier bag of sandwiches at me and indicates to pull out into the one-way system.

  "Don't make a mess," she says.

  I eye the cans of Pepsi. "Do you want a drink?" I ask innocently.

  "No." We're already snarled in the traffic by the station and she has plenty of time to give me a look. "Tommy, I'm not kidding about the mess."

  Her tone makes me want to spray the damn car with Pepsi. But I don't have the balls. If I hadn't made a thing of asking I might have got away with it, but it's too late now. Suki gives me another look, like she knows what I'm thinking.

  I get that she's wound up about her mum, but the dynamic between us has changed again and I don't like it much. It feels as if she's on a mission and I'm today's non-specific, loser project. I sigh and put the carrier bag on the floor between my feet with exaggerated care. She doesn't seem to notice.

  We crawl down the Botley Road with bikes and pedestrians overtaking us. Suki drums her
fingers and gives the smug cyclists dirty looks. "Well do you want the sandwiches? I made them for you," she says.

  "Maybe later."

  The sun's in her eyes so she roots in the glove compartment and comes up with sunglasses. It bugs me that she knew they were there. The glasses perch on her nose, way too big. She looks cross and cute.

  "So," I say. "Tell me about your mum."

  She shoves the car through a narrow gap in the traffic and brakes hard at a red light. Pepsi cans spill out of the carrier bag and she glares at me like it's my fault. I tidy them up as she says, "What did Jess tell you?"

  "She said your mum knows about ghosts, and stuff." I stop and pick my words. "But she's not into it anymore."

  "That about covers it." She starts fiddling with the stereo. "Mum runs an organic market garden now."

  "Does she know we're coming?"

  She hits a button and I wince as Phantom of the Opera blasts out of the speakers. I hardly hear her mutter. "No, but I'm sure it will be a nice surprise."

  The music's too loud to talk and I get the message, but still. "Could we listen to something else?" I ask.

  She shakes her head. "I like this."

  I'm beginning to think at this moment I'm not even a project. I remember what Jess said. I'm sure Suki wants to help, but this feels a bit like I might be some sort of payback.

  Chapter Sixteen

  We drive way out into the country, past cream-tea villages and fields with herds of fat, glossy cows. It all looks pretty but the villages are dead and the cows' udders are swollen with milk. I'm not fooled. The countryside's not as sweet and kind as everyone makes out.

  Suki's a fast, precise driver but as the country roads get narrower, she has a sort of rally driver thing going on that would have Simon whimpering and nervous for his pretty car. I'm guessing she doesn't normally drive like this. Either that or he really is crazy about her.

  To distract myself from grabbing hold of something every time she dives out looking for an overtaking slot, I wonder what Anna is like. I tell myself she's probably not so bad and Jess was just screwing with me. I tell myself Suki can't have that scary a mother. I tell myself Suki wouldn't set me up.

  Suki blasts past some old guy in a Fiesta and slots back into the line of traffic to a chorus of horns.

  "Nice car, good acceleration," I say, yelling over the Phantom. "I guess it's not true what they say about BMW drivers."

  "Shut-up, and eat your sandwiches." But beneath the sunglasses, she cracks a tiny smile, and she eases off a bit.

  We listen to the highlights of Phantom one and a half times before we reach the village. It's a small place, no more than a couple dozen houses. We drive through, past sleek, stone cottages with four-by-fours parked outside. I spot a couple of not so sleek cottages cowering among the perfection, peeling paint, ratty old curtains in the windows and ancient cars hidden in garages.

  On the edge of the village, Suki turns up a farm track. At the top is a rough parking area. There are bags of new potatoes, trays of fruit and veg laid on tables out under sunshades, with a box for people to put money. There's a sign directing people to 'pick your own' propped up by one of the tables.

  Suki parks the car and we head along a pebbled path to the house. It's red brick, not pretty, and not as old as the village cottages. We go to the backdoor through a courtyard with outbuildings on three sides. One has a sign that says office but the door's shut. There's a woodshed with a wheelbarrow tipped among the logs.

  The back door's open. Suki goes in. "Mrs Black?" she calls out. Somewhere upstairs a Hoover is blasting away.

  I follow Suki down a narrow passage and turn left into the kitchen. It's big room with windows on both sides. There's an old Aga in the middle with archways either side. I can see the gardens out of the windows. I guess there's about an acre, rows of veg, a couple of large greenhouses and an orchard.

  "Wait here," Suki says and goes off. A minute later the Hoover shuts off upstairs and I can hear them talking. There are a few people working out in the gardens. I'm guessing one of them must be Suki's mum. I wonder if it's weird she went to say hello to the cleaning lady first.

  The kitchen has that comfortable, lived in look, and everything is well used, not shiny. There's a scrubbed pine table, high backed wooden chairs with little cushions tied on. I wander about. Through the arch there's a long pine dining table with benches down the sides, beyond this room there's a scullery with a washing machine, dryer, freezer and other stuff. There's another outside door. I hear Suki coming and head back into the main kitchen. She picks up an old school bell and rings it out the window. In the gardens one of the workers looks up. Suki waves and rings the bell again. She watches for a moment and then puts the bell back.

  "She'll be here in a bit." Something about the way she says it makes me nervous.

  I watch as she fills the kettle and puts in on the Aga. "Coffee or tea?"

  "Coffee."

  There's a cafetiere on the side and she fusses around choosing from a selection of coffees.

  I don't know where to put myself, whether to sit down at the table. Nobody's inviting me to sit down and it feels better, safer, to stand. Suki's still fiddling with mugs and stuff. I hear a door open down towards the scullery. Suki stops fiddling and we stand waiting.

  When Suki's mum appears, she's taller than I expected, about five eight, slender, tough but sort of elegant in a scruffy, too busy to give a shit way. Her hair's iron grey, wiry and pulled into a messy ponytail; it looks like she didn't bother to brush it first. She's wearing muddy work boots and cut off jeans smeared with dirt. There's something about her that makes you stare.

  Suki goes over and gives her a peck on the cheek. Her mum returns the gesture and watches me over Suki's shoulder.

  "This is Tommy," Suki waves me forward. "Tommy, this is Anna."

  I move forward, but with nothing beyond names to go on there's a painful moment of hesitation. I feel like I need to explain who I am but that's way too complicated.

  "Hello, Tommy," Anna says. She has green eyes like Suki, but not so kind. She looks as if she's trying not to be annoyed, but not trying that hard. Great start.

  Anna gets over it first and holds a hand out. I hesitate for a heartbeat and then grab it to make up. Her grip's strong; her hand's callused and rough like sandpaper. There's dirt ingrained in the skin of her fingers. She smells of earth and strawberries. She stares at me and holds my hand too long. I feel like she's deciding which strength bug repellent to use. When she lets go there's a new tightness round her mouth.

  Suki finishes making the coffee and carries the mugs over to the table. I can see she's about to suggest we all sit down but her mum moves first. She picks up a mug of coffee and hands it to me. "Why don't you have a look round outside, Tommy. While Suki and I catch up." It's not a suggestion. "Get some fresh air after the drive."

  I do as I'm told but when I get outside, I don't go far. I wander past the outbuildings and loop back round to the garden. I sip coffee and watch people working in the gardens. Then I think, screw it. I chuck the rest of the coffee and head back to the house.

  I left the door ajar so I can move along the passage, keeping quiet. The kitchen door is open too and I hear Suki and her mum talking. They're keeping their voices soft but I can tell they're arguing and it doesn't take a genius to guess what that's about. I hold still and listen.

  "So how long has this stuff been going on with him?" Anna asks.

  "I don't know exactly. Maybe a few months."

  "And why did you bring him here?"

  "I thought you could help."

  "A phone call and I could've told you otherwise."

  "That's why I didn't call." Suki sounds defensive.

  "Are you sleeping with him?" Anna asks.

  Holy crap.

  "No, not that it's your business."

  "Well that's something. So just dump him, get another project." Anna says this with a spite I feel like a hammer blow. It doesn't help that sh
e can't know me well enough for it to be personal. "You don't need to be part of whatever he's got going on."

  "Stay out of it. That's your answer to everything." Suki sounds bitter and sort of upset. I'd be pleased she cares but I'm still not sure how I fit into this scene.

  "You know I'm right," Anna says. "Why else are you here?"

  The silence stretches a bit and then Suki says, "The stuff that's happening, he's got no control over it. He needs help."

  "You can't help everyone. And it doesn't always work out well when you try to." Anna chips the words out as if she's said them a hundred times. "I'm telling you, you don't want to be round this guy."

  "What does that mean?" When she doesn't get an answer, Suki says, "He's got a gift, like us, what's so bad about that?"

  "You like him. You think he's a good guy. But what do you really know about him? Nothing." Anna sounds exasperated. "Suki, it's obvious he's not like us."

  "I don't see what's so different?"

  "I'm telling you it's different. That should be enough."

  "It's not," Suki says and my stupid heart beats a bit faster until she says, "Not when you're the one who won't let me understand. Tell me what's so different."

  "He's not a medium. He doesn't have a gift, where does that leave him? Work it out."

  They go quiet and I wonder if somehow they know that I'm listening. I reach back and push the door so it bangs shut. Then I go along the passage. They both look up as I come into the kitchen. The room's charged like a storm is coming. I don't need any kind of gift to sense it. I sort of wave the empty mug and head over as if I want to get more coffee. No one's fooled.

  Suki and her mum stare at each other and in the end it's Anna that seems to give in.

  She looks up at me and says, "Suki tells me you need some advice."

  I'm surprised at her change of heart, but I can't call her on it without letting them know I've been eavesdropping. I look at Suki, but she doesn't offer any help. I nod and say, "Yes."

  Anna stands up. "Come on then, let's get on with it." She heads past me across the passage to another room.