The Marriage Intervention

by Hilary Dartt

  “True. But it’s not like I’m a creepy bad guy or anything. I just want to see what people are up to.”

  “Without them seeing what you’re up to.”

  “I’m not up to anything interesting, anyway,” he said.

  That was probably true. And anyway, it wasn’t that creepy. She might do the same thing. Of course, she wouldn’t do the same thing, but she was crazy in infatuation with this guy.

  As she did with so many things, she laughed it off: “You could start posting post-coital selfies of the two of us.”

  The modern-day Josie knew what she had to do: she had to turn her sexy dress into a power outfit, and there was only one way to do that. She went to the back of her closet and dug out the highest heels she owned. She stepped carefully into them before checking herself out in the mirror.

  “Oh yeah,” she said aloud.

  As she ate breakfast, she thought about The Biggest Secret Of All, the one where he was set to become her boss in a few weeks. She definitely should have stopped seeing him after he revealed that one.

  But his lavish attention was like a balm after losing her mom. She needed the distraction. A child is always the most important thing in her mother’s life, and when Mama was gone, Josie felt a burning solitude. Scott soothed that. So she continued to see him, to think about him, to daydream about him like a stupid junior high girl. Even after he said he couldn’t possibly date one of his employees. She may have even doodled his name on her classroom whiteboard, but just his first name, so as not to reveal his identity to any of her fellow teachers.

  The week before school started, they lay together in her bed, their sweaty limbs tangled and heavy with relaxation and bliss. He rolled toward her and brushed her bangs back from her forehead with a tenderness that made her insides vibrate.

  “You know this can’t last, right?” he said, not for the first time.

  Although the vibrating stopped and her body welled up with dread, she nodded as if it were no big deal. As if she didn’t feel like bawling.

  “I know.”

  “I mean, we both want the same thing, right? We both want to focus on our careers. And we can’t do that, working together at the same place and, well”—he motioned to their naked bodies—“sleeping together.”

  “You call this sleeping?” she teased, running a finger up his arm.

  Even though she knew he was right and that it was impossible for them to stay together once the school year started, the sound of his sleepy chuckle made her want to do it all over again, and she turned toward him.

  “Well, I guess we’d better sneak in as much of this sleeping together as we can.”

  They had, but only for a few more hot, passionate weeks before school started. They tried to quit each other cold turkey, but more than once that first couple of weeks, they ended up in some tiny secret place, putting their hands all over each other like hormone-crazed teenagers.

  Now, nearly a decade later, Josie strode out to her car to drive to work and face the music. Yesterday’s coffee with Scott had been a come-on. But if she was serious about fixing her marriage, she need to stop it in its tracks.

  ***

  “Wow. I get to see you first thing, two mornings in a row.”

  As usual, Scott was in his office when Josie arrived in her power (a.k.a. power sexy) outfit well before the start of the school day.

  “Coffee?” he said.

  “Not today,” she said. “Look, Scott, I need to talk to you.”

  “Over coffee?” He gestured to the chair in front of his desk.

  She didn’t move. “No, not over coffee. Or drinks. Or lunch. Or anything else. Look, I’ll be honest—”

  “Are you ever anything other than honest?”

  She allowed a tiny smile, but continued as if he hadn’t spoken. “The time we spent together was magical. And I admit, I thought we were a really good fit. There have even been times when I thought we might have been—never mind, actually.” She shook her head. “Anyway. I thought we were a really good fit. At the time, the only reason we couldn’t be together was—”

  “Wait. You thought we might have what? What were you going to say?”

  “Nothing,” Josie said. “The point is that our work was keeping us apart. And with you leaving, that’s not the case anymore.”

  When she paused, he jumped right in. “Which is why I asked you to go for drinks with me.”

  She held up a finger.

  “I no longer think we’re a good match,” she said. “And as you know, I’m married now. So even if work wasn’t standing between us, my marriage would be. I can’t go to drinks with you. Not now and not in the future.”

  Scott was silent for a moment, and Josie leaned against the doorjamb waiting for him to respond. Suddenly, he smiled, a quick flash that still sent a shock of heat to her lady parts.

  “So are you saying you no longer consider me a friend?”

  Uncomfortable, Josie shifted her weight and switched her bag to the other shoulder. “It’s not that. I do consider you a friend, but I also consider our history.”

  “Which no one knows about. Or needs to know about. I’m just asking you to go for drinks. As friends.”

  “Somehow I don’t think the two of us going for drinks is quite the same as me going to Rowdy’s with Summer and Delaney.”

  “It could be somewhere more intimate, like Rosa’s,” he said.

  “Somehow I don’t think you’re getting this,” Josie said. “Intimacy is the exact opposite of what we need.”

  “Fine,” Scott said. “Let’s go for beers at The Pennant. As friends. No strings.”

  “You’re insufferable.”

  “I know. That’s part of my charm, right?”

  Josie simply shook her head and walked out of his office and up the stairs to her classroom. As she neared the first landing, she heard Scott call from below, “Love you in that dress, by the way.”

  Even though she had renewed her commitment to her marriage, even though she had sworn off Scott and had come here this morning to tell him just that, even though she wanted to seduce her husband into the sack this very night, she warmed at the remark.

  Yes, partly because she was an absolute expert at choosing the right outfit. But also because he still knew exactly what to say. And damned if it didn’t affect her.

  ***

  Josie’s phone rang at precisely eight o’clock, just as the school’s first bell tolled.

  “Oops,” she said to herself. “Forgot to put it on silent.”

  She didn’t recognize the number but picked up anyway, a reflex to stop the ringing.

  “This is Melody from Doctor Strasser’s office, calling to confirm yours and Paul’s appointment with Doctor Strasser on Monday afternoon at four p.m.”

  “Oh. Um. Okay. Thanks. See you there.”

  The call caught her off guard, but not so much that she didn’t know who to blame. She’d recognized the name Dr. Strasser the moment his secretary had said it in her perfectly musical voice. Summer and Derek had gone to him a while back, and over the course of a few months, Summer talked about him like he was a new BFF. “Dr. Strasser this,” and, “Dr. Strasser that.” Josie wouldn’t be surprised if he showed up at Happy Hour one day.

  Students started trickling in, so between greetings, her fingers flew over the texting keyboard as she composed a message to Delaney and Summer.

  I’ll kill you for this, ladies.

  Summer: Oh, good. Dr. Strasser’s office must have confirmed. You won’t kill us. You’ll thank us. You’ll worship us. Remember when we said that to Delaney during The Dating Intervention? Haha. Anyway, I thought Monday afternoon should work since it’s Paul’s day off.

  Delaney: Remember how much Summer loved him?

  Josie: How could I forget?

  Summer: We knew you wouldn’t go if we didn’t schedule it for you. Just show up, okay?

  Josie: Fine.

  Summer: PS. I saw you looking sexy in your power sexy dress
this morning. What is the meaning of that?

  “How did she—”

  Josie realized her entire class was seated now, and twenty-four little faces looked at her expectantly.

  “Never mind,” she said.

  She turned off her phone, slid it into her purse, and smiled at her kids.

  “It’s time to begin bell work, please. Today’s question is: If you had to choose between excitement and stability, which one would you choose and why?”

  After a moment of stunned silence, Kira Martin raised her hand. “Um, Mrs. Garcia? What does this question even mean?”

  ***

  Carla Garcia was an old-fashioned woman. She didn’t believe in “any of this woo-woo stuff,” like marriage counseling or antidepressants. If she knew Josie was planning to go to marriage counseling, she would flap her hand dismissively, and say, “Nothing a little hanky panky won’t fix, mija. You’re paying thousands of dollars to a head doctor to tell you what I already know. Just get in his pants. All you’ve got to do to keep a man happy is feed him and make sure he’s getting enough sleep and enough sex. Food, sleep, sex. That’s it.”

  It was lunch recess and Josie sat alone in the teachers’ lounge. She laughed to herself and took another bite of the turkey wrap she’d made this morning.

  “What’s so funny?”

  Josie felt her body go rigid at the sound of Blair Upton’s voice. That woman’s way of speaking was grating. Forget nails on a chalkboard. It was ten times worse.

  “Nothing,” she said when she swallowed the bite she’d just taken. “Just thinking.”

  Blair slid into a chair across the table from Josie, and Josie put her wrap down. When she noticed Blair didn’t have any food, she looked pointedly at the empty tabletop and said, “What’s up?”

  “I know the truth about how you got the principal position,” she said.

  Josie almost laughed again, but managed to hold it in by biting the inside of her cheek. Blair couldn’t possibly know Summer and Delaney had hacked into her human resources account, used her password (bigpenis, all one word) and submitted her almost-complete application after she chickened out.

  Working to keep her expression as serious as possible, she said, “How? Applied for it? Aced the interview process?”

  Blair smiled as if she knew something Josie didn’t. Something really good and juicy.

  “No. How you slept with Scott Smith. Nothing feels as rewarding as sleeping your way to the top, does it?”

  Josie sensed Blair was bluffing, feeling out the situation. Blair had a thing for Scott. Josie had seen her batting her eyelashes at him all over the place.

  The temptation was strong to admit that she had, in fact, had a relationship with Scott, but that it had nothing to do with her earning the principal position. However, it wouldn’t look good for either her or Scott, even though they were long over by the time she applied.

  “I don’t know where you get your info,” Josie said. “But it’s inaccurate. Maybe you should try checking your sources before you come in here with veiled threats.”

  Josie stood up, put her half-eaten turkey wrap back in its plastic bag and pushed in her chair.

  “Oh, they’re not veiled,” Blair said. “I’m going to the school board with this information. You’ll never become principal. And as you know, I came up second on the list. You’ll be answering to me next year.”

  Whether the anger resulted from Blair’s old-fashioned bitchiness, or from the fact that she couldn’t tell her the truth about how long gone her relationship with Scott was, or the fact that her marriage was falling apart and it was Scott’s fault and she didn’t care if she protected him, Josie felt the blood rush to her face.

  “I’m afraid you’re quite wrong,” she said to Blair, whose eyebrows arched at her maliciously like they had minds of their own. “Whether I ever slept with Scott is irrelevant because I’m the best qualified for the principal position. That’s why I got it, and that’s why you’ll be answering to me. Until I find a reason to fire you.”

  “We’ll see,” said Blair, unaffected. “We’ll see.”

  Josie walked back to her classroom, conscious of keeping her pace normal and even.

  Threatening Blair with being fired was probably a bit over the top, but it sure felt good to say it. And who would Blair report the threat to? Scott? Even if Blair did bat her eyelashes at him, he wouldn’t give her the time of day on this one.

  And if Blair went to the school board, her eyebrows would gravely diminish her credibility. At least, Josie hoped so.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  If Paul thought she had blindsided him with the whole “I want to work on our marriage” thing, he had another thing coming. That thing was marriage counseling, prescribed by Summer and Josie.

  Monday morning, as she dressed in a decidedly non-sexy outfit of khaki pants and a demure pink button-up blouse, she told Paul about their appointment. Having gotten home late, he was still in bed.

  “You’ve got to be kidding me,” he moaned into his pillow.

  “Don’t blame me. Summer and Delaney made the appointment.”

  He groaned.

  “You know we have to go. We can’t cancel now or we’ll still have to pay for the appointment. And it would really offend Summer and Delaney if we didn’t take their advice.”

  “I have so many issues with this, it’s not even funny,” Paul said. “We don’t need counseling. If you have a problem, let’s talk about it.”

  Tried that. It didn’t work.

  He rolled onto his back and put his hands over his face, then continued speaking. “Second, why are you talking to Summer and Delaney about our so-called problems? Wait. Don’t answer. It’s because you’re women and that’s what women do. Right?”

  She opened her mouth to speak, but Paul interrupted her, again. “Don’t answer. Third, why do they think it’s okay to just make an appointment for us with some quack we don’t even know? Don’t answer. They think it’s okay because aside from being women, the three of you are perfectly comfortable interfering in each other’s lives. Like when Delaney and a pregnant Summer climbed up the ancient fire escape at your school to make sure you went to your interview. I can’t believe Derek let that fly.”

  “See? We have lots to talk about with Dr. Strasser,” she said, purposely omitting Derek’s reaction which had been to say he wanted to forbid Summer from spending time with Josie and Delaney (only, he hadn’t, because he knew she’d get into even more dangerous shenanigans sneaking out to see them).

  Josie had put on her shoes and jewelry by this time, and she bent down to give him a quick kiss on the cheek.

  “I’ll see you at four.”

  As she walked out the front door, she could have sworn she heard him muttering, “Your mother would think we’re crazy.”

  She pretended not to notice, because she knew he was right.

  ***

  Josie was habitually late to everything except work, so she didn’t understand why Dr. Strasser took such offense to her being late to the first counseling appointment. It was only ten minutes.

  Of course, Paul showed up five minutes early.

  “I’m a cop,” he often reminded her. “On time is late. Early is on time.”

  When she finally rushed into the office, Paul looked bored and the illustrious Dr. Strasser looked irritated.

  I thought psychologists weren’t supposed to look irritated.

  “Sorry I’m late,” she said. “I got caught up in something at work.”

  “Ms. Garcia,” Dr. Strasser said. “I value my own time. I value your time. And I value your marriage as I hope you do. Please arrive at the scheduled appointment time in the future.”

  Josie looked at Paul, hoping for some kind of silent moral support, some there-won’t-be-a-next-time shrug or eyebrow raise, but he continued to stare straight ahead as if she hadn’t entered the room.

  “I apologize,” she said in a voice that sounded stiff and huffy even to her own ears.
>
  She sat down in the chair next to her husband and put her purse on her lap. Dr. Strasser’s eyes flicked to her purse and then back to her face.

  “As you know, I’m Dr. Strasser,” he said. “You may call me Dr. Strasser, Dr. S., or John. Let’s jump right in. Why are you here?”

  Josie realized she was clutching her purse like a life preserver and forced her hands to relax. Her eyes snapped over to Paul, but he continued staring straight ahead.

  “Um, okay,” Josie said. “We’re here because I feel like we’ve drifted apart. We rarely see each other anymore, and when we do, Paul is distracted with work. His work is way more important to him than our marriage is.”

  Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Paul flinch.

  Oops. Didn’t really mean to say that. But I guess that’s how I feel, so…

  Dr. John Strasser nodded.

  “Paul, why don’t you give me your reason for being here.”

  Her husband smirked at her, and for that split second, she recognized the old Paul. She wanted nothing more than to reach out and take his hand. But the expression was gone as quickly as it had appeared.

  “Josie made me come,” he said.

  Dr. Strasser smiled, but it was a thin, almost condescending smile and instead of answering, he continued looking at Paul, forcing him to provide a better answer.

  “Geez, this is worse than being on the stand in a courtroom,” Paul said. He shifted in his chair. “The truth is, I thought things were fine until Josie said she wanted to work on our marriage. I admit she’s been a little, um, critical lately, and I’m often relieved when I get called into work on my days off. But I just thought it was, you know, that time of the month or something. She seems happy at work, she’ll be the principal next year. I mean, I didn’t really think anything was wrong. All relationships have their ups and downs, right?”

  “Yes, they do,” Dr. Strasser said. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t decrease the frequency and severity of those down cycles. Now. I don’t want to make any assumptions here, so let me ask each of you a question. At this point do you want to remain together, to stay married?”