Maggie mumbled in her sleep.
Braden cuddled her closer. She was such a mystery to him. That she would traverse this path for the sake of her brothers and the lives of the clansmen spoke a lot for her.
And he found himself wondering what choice she would have made in his mother’s place. Would she have given up the child not hers, or would she have stood to defend all of them equally?
Och, now, what does it matter?
Who wants the seriousness of a wife?
But deep in his heart, he knew there lived a tiny piece of himself that really did want a family. Maggie was right. He did love the fanciful tales bards sang of women who would defend their families with their lives. He wanted that dream. A dream of that one perfect soul mate who would never ask more of him than he could give. An unselfish woman who would never betray his trust or his love.
And to his immense shock, he found himself looking at Maggie and wondering if perhaps she could be the one…
You’re a fool, Braden MacAllister. And a damned one, at that.
Aye, he was. Already he’d allowed her to lead him off against his common sense on a fool’s errand that would most likely get them killed.
A lass such as Maggie was poison to a man such as he.
No woman was worth his life. Not now, not ever.
Not even Maggie.
Chapter 15
They traveled through the night and well into the next day before they finally stopped for a rest.
While the men led the horses to the side of the makeshift camp to rub them down, Maggie prepared a light meal of what was left of their bread and cheese.
The entire morning had passed in silence, though whether from stress or fatigue, she wasn’t sure. Braden had been strangely distant from her all day, which was odd given how gentle he’d been while she slept in his arms.
Several times in the night, she had jerked awake to find his arms surrounding her with warmth, and one time in particular she had felt him leaning his cheek against the top of her head while he cupped her face gently with one hand. She’d felt so safe then, so strangely wanted.
But from the moment she had awakened completely and he had stopped to let her ride her own horse, she had sensed a wall between them. Almost as if he had shut himself completely off from her.
Maggie didn’t like that feeling. Not one little bit.
What does it matter? she asked herself. By tomorrow, one way or the other, all this will be over.
Suddenly pain struck her dead in the chest. Aye, this journey would end on the morrow.
Tomorrow they could all be dead.
She, Sin and Braden.
Maggie went cold as the reality of it came crashing down on her, and she set her food aside. Robby MacDouglas was every bit as likely to kill her as he was to listen to her. More so, in fact.
It was a sobering thought, and for the first time since she had started this journey, the full reality of it hit her. This could very well be her last day on earth.
Struggling to breathe, she looked around as if seeing the world for the very first time. She saw the beauty of the pines and oaks, of all the trees surrounding her. The way their gray and brown bark contrasted with the lush green forest. She felt the crispness of the grass beneath her as she sat cross-legged on the ground. Heard the gentle lullaby of the birds and insects as they moved around her. She smelled the bright sunshine that warmed her skin, the dew on the heather.
The world was a truly beautiful place.
Dear Lord, she didn’t want to die. Not yet. Not while she had so much left to do!
Unbidden, a thousand wishes whirled through her mind simultaneously. All the things she had wanted to do in her life but never had the chance to do. She’d wanted to see Ireland just once, to go south and visit Hadrian’s Wall. She’d wanted to watch her children and grandchildren frolic across her yard as they hunted for dragon treasure and teased each other.
She’d looked forward to watching Anghus’s infant son grow to manhood, teaching him to ride and pick berries. She’d even wanted to see Ian find a good lass and marry.
So many things she’d wanted to do, had always looked forward to doing.
Now her time for doing it might very well be up.
And then her gaze fell to Braden as he freed her horse to graze and started rubbing down his own. He lifted one strong hand up to brush a dark lock of hair from his damp brow.
Maggie froze. Of all the things she had wanted in her life, he was the one thing she regretted most not having. All the dreams she had dreamed of him, all the pretend kisses she had given her pillow—all that came rushing back to her.
And then she made a decision.
After all these years of living her life for others, there was one selfish act that she wanted.
If she did die on the morrow, there was one last thing she wanted to do. One regret she didn’t want to have.
Braden left the horses to graze. He had started back toward Maggie when he noticed Sin sitting propped against a tree. He took two steps toward his brother before he realized Sin was sound asleep.
Smiling at the unusual event, Braden shook his head. So, his brother was human after all. There were times when even he had doubts.
Unwilling to disturb Sin, Braden tiptoed backward until he knew he wouldn’t wake him.
As he drew closer to the camp, Braden forced himself not to look at Maggie. But it was difficult. He knew he had to keep distance between them, and yet it was the hardest thing he had ever tried to do in his life.
While Sin is sleeping, I’m going to bathe,” he said to her, retrieving his pack from the ground.
He had to give Sin credit. His brother had done a remarkable job of gathering most of their supplies before getting them out of Tara and her sisters’ clutches. But then, speed of action and quick thinking under pressure were Sin’s specialties.
When Maggie didn’t speak to him, he glanced at her. She sat quietly alone, not paying him any heed.
No doubt I hurt her by ignoring her this morning. The pain of the thought sliced through him, and inwardly he cursed.
He should never have come on this trip. Never have volunteered to get the women out. If he hadn’t spent so much time with Maggie the last two days, then he never would have known how much she meant to him. He could have lived out the whole of his life in blissful ignorance.
Sighing, he headed through the trees to the stream they’d been following.
He doffed his clothes and waded in, but not even the coldness of the water could squelch the fiery need he had for her. Any more than it could take her from his mind.
Braden dove under the water and did his best not to think of redheaded nymphs who were capable of stealing men’s souls.
Maggie stared into the trees in the direction where Braden had vanished. Her hands shook as she debated what she should do.
Go on, her mind urged. You already made the decision.
Aye, she had made it, but she had yet to act upon it. It was the acting that gave her trouble. She knew Braden wouldn’t turn her away.
But how would it change their relationship? Once she had carnal knowledge of him, they would never be able to go back to the way they had been before.
Of course, she really didn’t want to go back to being invisible around him.
What do you want?
“I want a miracle,” she whispered.
A full-blown, walk-on-water miracle. She wanted Braden to be hers. And if she survived the meeting with the MacDouglas, she didn’t want to kiss him good-bye and watch him wander off with another woman.
And if you die?
She trembled even more.
Closing her eyes, she tried to decide what to do. As she concentrated, an image of Braden holding her drifted through her mind. She could feel him, smell him.
Taste him.
All her life, she had wanted him, and him alone.
And it was then she realized the full depth of her love for Braden. Nay, she couldn’t g
o to her grave or even another day without knowing the man who had stolen her heart.
Even if it ultimately meant letting him go, she wanted to know what it truly felt like to love him completely as a woman.
Her entire body shaking, Maggie rose slowly to her feet, then headed off through the trees in search of the only man she would ever love.
Braden grunted as he ran his hands through his sleek wet hair. It felt good to be clean again. He bent at the waist to rinse his face. And as he straightened, he heard a slight splash behind him.
Before he could move, two shapely wet arms encircled his waist and pulled him back against two perfectly round breasts that caressed the hollow of his back.
“Braden?”
He froze at the sound of Maggie’s voice in his ear as her moist, bare breasts burned a hole in his spine. He wanted to say something to her, but his throat was so tight, he could barely breathe.
“Would you let me make love to you?” she asked.
Oh, this is a dream! It has to be a dream.
Surely his little blossom wouldn’t…
His thoughts scattered as she loosened her hold on his waist and stepped around him.
Good Lord, she was beautiful. More so than she’d even been before.
His gaze darted over her glistening body, taking her in all at once. Her damp russet hair curled around her impish, freckled face. Her creamy, bare shoulders sparkled from the droplets of water that caught the rays of the sun.
But most of all, he gazed at her bare breasts, at the tight, taut peaks that begged for a lover’s kiss. A lover’s touch.
And at that moment, he wished the water wasn’t so deep, for it reached to her navel and he wanted to see more of her.
“Maggie,” he breathed. “What—”
“Shhh,” she said, placing a finger to his lips. “Don’t say anything, lest I change my mind.” Her gaze raked his body with a hungry, almost desperate look. “And I don’t want to change my mind.”
Braden knew he should turn her away. It would be the noble, decent thing to do. But then, he had never been noble or decent.
And before he could decide anything, she reached out and ran her hand over his chest, across his own taut nipple, dragging her nails ever so gently over his flesh. A thousand chills erupted through him as his body burned from the inside out.
Why was she doing this?
Why would she want a man like him? It made no sense to him whatsoever.
She moved her hand from his lips, then dipped her head to where she could draw his nipple into her mouth and suckle it ever so tenderly.
Braden moaned from the pleasure her tongue and lips gave him. And then she did the most unbelievable thing of all: She dipped her hand beneath the water and cupped him in her hand. That gentle, hesitant touch of her fingers against his shaft went deeper than the physical. It touched him all the way to his unrepentant soul.
Dizzy and on fire, he was past the point of rational thought. All he could think of was finally sating the deep hunger that had incessantly gnawed at him since the moment he’d seen her defying him at the kirk’s door.
How he wanted her. It was beyond his understanding and it was a desperation so profound that it shook him all the way to his heart.
Cupping her face in his hands, he tilted her head up to where he could claim her lips with his own.
She sighed into his mouth as she continued to stroke his swollen shaft with her hand.
Reflexively, Braden’s body arched against her palm and fingers, letting her have her way with him as he tasted the pure heaven of her mouth.
Maggie feared she might faint as her head swam from the taste of him, from the silken feel of his rigidness under her fingertips. Never had she imagined what a man would feel like. Braden was so strangely soft and hard at the same time. Like velvet stretched over steel.
Aye, she wanted this man. And if this was the only way she could have him, then she would take it.
For this moment in time, he was hers, and she would love him the way she’d always dreamed of loving him.
With the whole of her heart.
There would be no holding back. No timidity.
She would never want any other man to touch her like this. To kiss her. Hold her. Braden was the only man she would ever burn for. To the devil with her fears.
Braden picked her up in his arms and waded with her back to the shore. He placed her down on the plaid she had stretched out on the bank for them.
“You had this all planned, didn’t you?” he asked with a light, humorous note in his voice.
Maggie nodded.
“And if I had turned you away?” he asked.
“I wouldn’t let you,” she whispered, then she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled his head to hers for another long, deep and satisfying kiss.
Braden didn’t disappoint her as he plundered her mouth like a Viking of old. She sighed in contentment and ran her hands down his lean, hard back.
He was the man of her dreams and she was going to enjoy this.
His muscles danced and flexed beneath her palms as his chest rubbed against hers. Exciting her, teasing her. Pleasing her.
Oh, but the man felt good. He tasted even better.
Her hero. Her love.
How she wished she could keep him like this forever. Lost in this moment where there were only the two of them. No past, no future. Nothing to separate them.
It was perfect.
He left her lips and trailed a scorching kiss to her neck where he suckled and teased her flesh with his tongue and teeth. Maggie arched her back, writhing in pleasure as his hands skimmed over her body. Down her freckled arms, over her waist to where he cupped her hips in his hands.
As he moved toward her breasts, she stopped him.
He looked up with a frown.
“This is my fantasy,” Maggie said with a sheepish smile.
Then Maggie rolled him onto his back and straddled his waist.
She took a moment to savor the feel of his hard, taut muscles caressing the sensitive place between her legs. It felt so strange the way those muscles contracted as he breathed. Instinctively, she pressed herself against him, eliciting a quiver of expectation through her body and a deep growl from Braden.
All the feelings she had buried surfaced then, and she gave herself over to her dreams and fantasies. To all the times in her life when she had imagined him at her mercy.
And for the moment, he was all hers. She felt strangely empowered and invigorated. He might leave her come the morning, but he would never forget her.
Never.
Braden stared up in awe of her as her felt the hairs at the juncture of her thighs gently tease his belly.
“And just what does this fantasy of yours include?” he asked as he watched her watch him.
Her smile grew wider. She dipped her head toward his and instead of giving him the kiss he expected, she lowered her mouth on to his throat.
Braden hissed in pleasure at the heat of her mouth as she seared him. Her tongue darted over the stubble of his neck, teasing and tormenting him with wave after wave of ecstasy.
It was so strange. He couldn’t count the women who had done that to him in the past, and yet none of them had ever made him feel this odd sense of rightness. This sense of wholeness.
And what terrified him most was the fact he couldn’t push her away. He needed this in a way that defied explanation.
She leaned forward so that her breasts were flattened against his chest and he shook all over.
“Maggie,” he breathed raggedly, running his hands over the smooth, satiny skin of her back.
Then she moved her mouth lower.
Slowly, thoroughly, she covered his chest and arms with her scorching kisses. Her breasts pounded against him, flaying his chest with pleasure as her hands explored every inch of his skin.
Braden couldn’t remember a woman ever being so bold with him. One who seemed to get her own pleasure from giving it to him. It was
incredible.
And in that moment, he realized just how much his little blossom meant to him.
Saints have mercy on his soul. Whatever was he going to do?
Push her away.
He’d sooner die, and yet he knew that he would have to leave her.
Don’t think about it.
Nay, he wouldn’t. He would just savor the moment and the woman. Live it without thought of tomorrow. Right now there was just the two of them and he wouldn’t let anyone, not even himself, separate what they were sharing.
Maggie reveled in the sounds of Braden’s moans and growls filling her ears. She should probably be embarrassed by her actions, but she had made up her mind. If she was going to do this, then she was going to do it completely and without reservation.
Before this day ended, she wanted to know him from the top of his head all the way down to his toes.
That thought foremost in her mind, she dipped her mouth to the flesh of his hipbone. Braden sucked his breath in sharply between his teeth as he quivered beneath her.
Maggie laughed in her throat as she continued her relentless exploration of him.
Who would have thought that such a brave, strong man could be laid low by a simple caress?
That knowledge gave her power and excited her all the more.
He was hers.
Braden buried his hand in her hair as he fought the urge to take control of the situation. He would have his chance to fill her shortly. For the moment, he would content himself with letting her have her way with him.
But it was hard. And getting harder by the minute.
She moved her hand again to cup the pulsing ache between his legs. And then, to his utter amazement, she moved her head and took him full into her mouth.
Braden shook all over as her tongue toyed with him. He hissed as he stared in awe of her auburn head buried between his thighs.
She had no idea what that sight did to him. Her selflessness, her giving. She wasn’t just taking pleasure from him like his other lovers. She was sharing the moment with him in a way no one ever had before.
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