A Light Within

by Darlene Mindrup

  “Give me the pup,” he commanded, and his voice told her he meant to be obeyed.

  Clutching the pup closer, she again shied away from him. “Nay! If you mean to harm this pup, then you must needs harm me first, for I will not give him over to you!”

  It occurred to Garek that if the other women of England were like this stubborn, fiery vixen, England might well still be in English control.

  It continued to amaze him that Brianna could be so passionate, never before losing her temper in his presence. He had no doubt that she meant what she said. There was no way he could part her from the pup without causing one of them some harm.

  Turning, Brianna fled from the room into the kitchen, slamming the door behind her. Garek gazed at the door, a frown creasing his brow.

  Sir Bolson stood at his side, an amused smirk on his face.

  “What now, my liege?”

  Garek barely glanced at him. “It is not my wont to hurt the maid, but neither can I let the poor beast suffer. The wench must listen to reason.”

  Pressing his lips tightly together, Garek followed after her. As he was about to open the door, Bolson grinned at him.

  “Good luck, milord.”

  Garek quieted him with a look, opening the door into the cooking chamber.

  He found Mary roasting a pig on a spit over the fire. She rapidly came to her feet.

  “Milord?”

  His eyes scanned the room. “Where is Brianna?”

  “Brianna, milord? She took the back stairs to her room.”

  Garek went after her. He found himself outside a locked door.

  “Brianna, open this door,” he commanded.

  When he heard no movement within, he banged loudly, shaking the portal with his anger. “Wench, open this door, or by heaven I will break it in!”

  He could hear her slowly cross the room. She opened the door a crack and Garek saw her tear-ravaged face. Shoving the door wider, he strode into her room.

  “Where is the pup?”

  Brianna darted to the corner of the room where Garek could see a small wooden box. In it, Brianna had placed her old worn kirtle and gunna, wrapping the pup snugly inside.

  Beside the box rested a flagon of milk and what had once been a falconer’s glove. The smallest finger had been cut from the leather and set beside the bowl.

  Forehead wrinkled, Garek turned to Brianna. “What are you about, woman?”

  Without saying a word, Brianna dropped to her knees, taking the pup and carefully settling it on her lap. She crooned to the beast as she lifted the finger of the glove. Garek noticed a drop of milk dripping from a hole in the center of the finger.

  Brianna adjusted the pup’s head so that she could work the glove into its mouth. The pup tried to suck, grunting as its tiny mouth worked up and down.

  Her head lowered over the creature, Brianna missed the long look Garek gave her. He felt something tightening in his chest as he stared at the bowed head beneath him. Her soft voice crooning to the pup did more than just soothe the beast.

  Realizing he had not only lost the battle but the war as well, Garek left the room. Someday he would have to teach the wench about who ruled this great manor. He didn’t realize that wagers were being made on who would teach whom.

  six

  Christmastide came, and with it a celebration the likes of which the shire had never seen before, for the previous lord of the manor had been a miserly man with little concern for the welfare of his villeins.

  Garek, on the other hand, showed himself to be generous and kind, though the people of the shire had found that his judgments were swift and sure.

  Not a man, woman, or child would go hungry this year. Garek and his men provided the meat and the villeins added their own contributions. A huge feast in the manor brought on much merriment and revelry. The ale flowed freely, and Brianna worried as Garek’s men became bolder in their advances toward the women. She herself had no worries, but Mary was having a hard time serving food and at the same time keeping her clothing where it belonged. So were many of the other serving maids.

  Brianna wished the night a speedy end, for she knew in the morning the men would be as tame as kittens, especially with their pounding headaches. Much of their play was harmless, but well she knew the effects of drink, having a brother who freely imbibed.

  Garek’s attention was on other things. A small smile played about his lips as he watched Bolson and Hormis vie for Mary’s attention. He turned and caught Brianna staring at him. His eyes met hers and Brianna found herself unable to look away. What is he thinking that causes his eyes to darken to the color of a stormy sea? she wondered.

  A sudden clatter took their attention. Mary stood arms akimbo, glaring at the two knights seated before her. Flashing eyes warned Brianna that her friend was in a fine temper. Taking a drink from the table, Mary dumped it on each knight in turn.

  “Perhaps that will cool you off,” she told them angrily before turning and striding from the room.

  Amid guffaws from the men present, Brianna rose to follow her friend, but Garek took her by the wrist.

  “I have meant to ask you about the pup.”

  It had been two days and still the pup was alive. To Brianna’s eyes it appeared to be growing, although she supposed that was wishful thinking. She had no doubt that if Garek thought otherwise, the pup would meet a speedy end, for Garek hated to see anything suffer.

  “He is well, milord.”

  His eyes studied hers, and giving a brief nod, he released her. “It is good,” he told her.

  Brianna marveled that such a large, fearsome knight could be as gentle and caring as this one was. It was hard to believe that he would really have harmed such a small creature as the pup. At the same time, she found that his anger could flame to life with the least provocation, though to be honest, there was usually justification.

  She recalled those thoughts the next morning when she stood on the castle steps watching proceedings in the courtyard.

  A man bowed before Garek, his head hung over his bent knee awaiting the sentence he thought was surely to come. Brianna recognized him as one of Garek’s knights, though the man had found no favor in her eyes. There was something about him that Brianna didn’t trust. She had encountered men like him before and had reason to dislike them.

  Garek was talking to the man in such quiet tones that Brianna hadn’t a chance of hearing what was being said, but from the color of the other man’s face, it couldn’t have been good.

  A young girl stood at Garek’s side, her face lowered in shame. Brianna recognized the lass as the youngest daughter of the old woman who produced fine stitchery in the village. The girl’s name was Aleene, and she was as sweet as her mother was cruel.

  As the lord continued to speak, the girl’s face took on a frightened cast, her large blue eyes pleading for a mercy Brianna couldn’t understand.

  When Garek finished speaking to the man, the man looked up at Garek, then at Aleene, then back to Garek. Slowly he nodded his head.

  Aleene threw herself at Garek’s feet, and even from this distance Brianna had no trouble hearing her beg for mercy.

  Garek’s eyes swiftly roamed the circle of faces surrounding him, at last fastening upon Brianna. Motioning her to his side, Brianna made her way down the steps of the keep and across the courtyard.

  If not for the seriousness of the situation, Brianna would have laughed at the harassed expression on Garek’s face.

  “My lord?”

  “Take the wench inside and see if you can calm her,” he told Brianna, motioning to the girl still kneeling in the dirt at his feet.

  Brianna helped Aleene to her feet, murmuring soothing words. Brianna had no idea what had transpired, but the girl looked frightened to death.

  Seating the girl on a bench in the great room, Brianna knelt before her, placing her hands gently on the girl’s, which were twisted together in her lap.

  “Aleene,” she murmured softly. “Tell me what has happened.
”

  Tears were coursing in floods down the other girl’s cheeks as her eyes found Brianna’s. Seeing the sympathy there, Aleene buried her face in her hands and began rocking back and forth, moaning.

  “Oh, Brianna, I would rather die!”

  “Shh, Aleene. You would rather die than what? What has happened?”

  Brianna pulled the girl’s hands from her face. Curling her fingers around Aleene’s shoulders, she shook her slightly.

  “Tell me!”

  The girl stared helplessly into Brianna’s eyes before bursting into tears again. Flustered, Brianna turned when Garek walked into the room, his look settling on Aleene.

  “Falstaff has agreed to marry you,” he told the girl, his voice harsher than he intended.

  Brianna rose to her feet in surprise. “Marry her? Falstaff?”

  Garek looked as though he would rather be anywhere than that place. He had never been able to deal with a woman’s tears, and this was no exception. He shrugged helplessly.

  “The girl was deflowered. There must needs be restitution. Her mother demands it.”

  Whirling, Brianna dropped to the girl’s side again. “Oh, Aleene. I did not know. How awful for you!”

  Aleene turned pleading eyes to Garek. “I beg you, milord. Don’t make me marry the man!”

  “What say you, woman? Your mother has demanded it, and Falstaff swore an oath to protect such as you. He chose to break that vow; now he can face the consequences.”

  “But she does not love Falstaff!” Brianna argued.

  Garek’s face flooded with color. “It is not of love I speak. Falstaff has wrongly used the wench, and he must make amends. Would you condemn the girl to a lonely life without any man to care for her?”

  For the second time in only a few days, Brianna’s face was animated by her anger. Her eyes flashed fire. “Falstaff violated her and you would give her over to the man?”

  “What else would you have me do? Her mother insists on it, I tell you.”

  “Her mother be hanged!”

  Garek’s eyebrows flew up at this unaccustomed outburst. He had never heard the girl speak a wrong word about anyone.

  “Garek,” she pleaded. “There is more to this than you understand.”

  Crossing his arms over his chest, he stared at Brianna belligerently. “Then make me understand.”

  Aleene looked from one to the other. Her hope was pinned on Brianna, but the giant knight looked as unmovable as a stone statue.

  “It is not a husband Aleene’s mother seeks for her but a means of support. She knows that your knights are from wealthy families. She has never cared what happened to Aleene, and as you can see, she doesn’t care now, either. She is only looking for money.”

  He looked from her to Aleene, sighing. “Perhaps what you say is true, but the girl has been deflowered and has no hope of finding a husband now.”

  Aleene hung her head, but Brianna wouldn’t give up. “Ask.”

  “What?”

  “Ask if there are any who would consider Aleene for a wife.”

  Garek stared at her as though she had suddenly lost her mind. “Who would you have me ask?”

  Brianna flung her hand towards the castle door. “Ask your knights. Ask the villagers.”

  They faced each other a long time before Garek took Aleene by the arm and, muttering to himself, he strode across the hall. Slamming open the door, he exited the hall.

  Brianna followed at his heels, not sure she had done the right thing. Still, Brianna had watched the growing relationship between Serin and young Aleene, and she hoped the young knight would come to the girl’s aid now. It was obvious to everyone that they had feelings for each other. The question was, how strong were those feelings?

  Garek stood at the top of the stairs, facing the crowd below that awaited his decision. He lifted Aleene’s hand in the air, and when he spoke, his deep voice was heard even to the farthest reaches of the crowd.

  “This girl has no wish to marry Sir Falstaff, nor he her. Is there any man here that would be willing to take his place? Otherwise, the marriage will occur as I have said.”

  Shivering with the cold, Brianna searched the crowd for Serin’s face. When she couldn’t find him, her heart began to pound. Where could he be?

  Garek was aggravated at having to be put in this position. His face burned with embarrassment, both for himself and the girl standing silently at his side. He glared angrily at Brianna.

  The crowd grew ominously quiet. No sounds could be heard save the rustling of clothing as each person looked at those around them.

  “I will marry the girl.”

  Brianna sighed with relief. Serin pushed his way forward, coming to stand at the bottom of the steps. His dark eyes were fastened upon Aleene.

  Surprised, Garek looked from one to the other. “What say you, maid? Is Sir Serin acceptable to you as a husband?”

  Aleene nodded her head, her eyes shining. “Aye, milord.”

  Not altogether sure of what was happening, but relieved nonetheless, Garek motioned for the young knight to take the girl’s hand.

  Even Aleene’s mother was satisfied, for it mattered not to her which knight her daughter married, so long as he had wealth. And since Serin was sheriff as well as knight, she was more than content to share her daughter’s good fortune.

  Brianna smiled happily at the young couple, her face bright with her pleasure. Garek was pleased to have caused her such joy, though he was still not sure what had just taken place.

  He was still mulling it over in his mind that evening when he called Bolson to him, giving over charge of the fief in his absence. Bolson seemed more than relieved that Sir Hormis was returning to London with Garek.

  Garek found himself reluctant to go. In spite of what he had said earlier, he seemed to have planted roots in this English countryside. Here he had found the peace that had eluded him for so long. Even the dreams were no longer as frequent as before.

  Brianna entered from the kitchen, stopping abruptly when she realized that Sir Bolson was with Garek. Bolson turned from his contemplations of the view outside the window, as Garek motioned her into the chamber.

  “Milord, I have repaired your tunic,” she told Garek, handing him the garment.

  “My thanks, Brianna. I feared it beyond saving and it was a favorite of mine.”

  Bolson excused himself and left the room. Brianna was about to do the same when Garek halted her.

  “Stay,” he commanded softly.

  Uncertain of his mood, she moved across the room and gingerly sat upon a stool close to the hearth. Remembering the last time she had sat here with Garek, Brianna felt hot color come to her cheeks.

  “You wished to speak with me?”

  Garek turned from her and began packing the supplies he would need for his trip, placing them in a sack. He frowned. Why had he asked the girl to stay?

  “How soon will you leave?” Brianna asked.

  “Before first light tomorrow.”

  Brianna fell silent. Her reluctance to see Garek leave was unsettling, for it hinted at feelings she was loathe to acknowledge. Would she ever see him again? The thought of not doing so sent a strange pain lancing through her heart.

  “I wish you Godspeed,” she told him quietly.

  He stopped what he was doing, turning to face her. He studied her bent head, but there was nothing about her that gave away any of her thoughts or feelings. He would miss her sorely, for her gentleness and compassion were rare among the women of his acquaintance.

  “If you have any needs, you are to take them to Sir Bolson, do you understand?”

  “Yea, milord.”

  He came to her side, kneeling before her. “You are not to hesitate,” he stressed.

  She looked into his eyes, her own unsure. What did he want from her? What exactly was he trying to say?

  Garek took her small hand in his larger one, studying it as though it would have the answers to all his questions.

  “Is the
re aught you wish from London?”

  She shook her head and his eyes returned to her face. “Nay, there is nothing.”

  Taking her hand from his, Brianna rose to leave. “I have work to do, milord. If there is nothing else. . .”

  Rising to his feet also, Garek looked down at her. There was nothing to keep her here but he found himself unwilling to let her go. It suddenly occurred to him that he might never see her again, for there was no telling what King William had in store for him.

  Cupping her face in the palms of his hands, he told her huskily, “Nothing, save this.”

  When his lips came down on hers, Brianna felt her heart leap within her breast. Closing her eyes, she savored the pleasure of the moment.

  The kiss ended long before Brianna wanted it to, and her eyes fluttered open, their color intensified by the unexpected desire she had felt. For the first time in my life I understand what a temptation love can bring.

  There. She had admitted it to herself. She loved Garek. At least she supposed that what she felt was love, although she had no way of knowing. Her lack of experience left her vulnerable.

  Garek watched the emotions flitting across her face, and for the first time in his life he thought of someone else before himself.

  “Go to bed, Brianna,” he told her, his voice still soft with his own desire.

  Nodding, she turned and left him standing there. When she reached the door, she looked back and found him still watching her. She went out, closing the door softly behind her.

  ❧

  Garek mounted his horse, adjusting himself to the saddle. Briefly his gaze focused on Brianna standing in the doorway of the keep, light from the torches spilling out from behind her. Her face in shadow, he had no way of knowing what she might be thinking.

  Sir Hormis tightened the girth on his own saddle before himself climbing on. He grinned at Garek, his eyes bright with enthusiasm for the trip to come.

  “Shall we?”

  Garek didn’t return his smile. He nodded his head once before turning his steed down the road.

  Brianna watched until the darkness swallowed them, shivering on the threshold. Finally, Mary called her inside.