Evening Stars

by Susan Mallery

  “Did you want to leave?” her boss asked, her expression concerned.

  “I don’t know.” She paused, then decided to admit the truth. “Yes, I did, but I was afraid to go after my dreams. There were always reasons to keep me here.”

  “I know you’ve been looking after your mom for a long time,” Andi admitted. “Paying the bills. I wasn’t trying to pry, but as you said, the island is small. I heard things. Won’t the painting change everything?”

  Nina reached for her iced tea. “I don’t know,” she admitted. “I hope so. If my mom can be responsible and not lose everything. If Averil...” She paused.

  There it was. Her go-to emotional place. Taking care of others. Worrying about everyone but herself. Only now she realized what she’d always seen as a virtue was a way to hide out and not take a chance.

  “Selling the painting will give all of us financial freedom.”

  “A nice thing to have,” Andi said gently. “What do you want to do with yours?”

  Nina opened her mouth, planning on saying she didn’t know. But what came out was, “I want to go to medical school.”

  Andi grinned. “I was hoping you were going to say that.”

  “You were? Why?”

  “Because you’ll be great and it’s what you want.” She wrinkled her nose. “It will make my life sucky because you’ll be difficult to replace.” She lightly touched Nina’s arm. “Please, don’t take this wrong, but I do mean difficult, not impossible. I’ll find someone.”

  “I know you meant it in the best way possible,” Nina said, a little surprised at her boss’s enthusiasm. “Do you think I could get into medical school? I’m not twenty-two.”

  “And that’s to your advantage. You have experience in the medical field. Do you know your specialty yet?”

  “I was thinking oncology.”

  “A tough one,” Andi told her. “But you’d be great. Have you taken your MCATs?”

  “Last year. I didn’t want to say anything.”

  “And you did well?”

  Nina grinned. “I did.”

  “Okay. Perfect. It’s June and you’ve way missed application deadlines for the fall.”

  Nina’s shoulders slumped. “I didn’t even think about that. You’re right. I can’t do anything until next year.”

  “Not necessarily. What I was going to say is my mom’s best friend is a dean at Tufts.” Andi rolled her eyes. “I have to admit, when my mom starts lecturing me, I stop listening. She’s better now, but her innate urge to tell me what to do with my life never goes away. Anyway, I’ll bet her friend could help. I’ll call Mom tonight and ask what she can do. In the meantime, download the application and start filling it out. I’m sure there’s a waiting list, but I’ve learned to never doubt the power of family connections. Especially when my mom is a famous cardiothoracic surgeon.”

  Nina pressed her hands against the table. “My head is spinning. Do you really think I could have a chance at getting in this fall?”

  “Let’s find out. If you don’t, then you’ll apply to a bunch of schools next year. I’ve seen you in action, Nina. If you want this, you can make it happen.”

  * * *

  Nina dressed for her dinner with Dylan carefully. Despite his declaration, she hadn’t been sure when she would hear from him again. But he’d called and asked her to dinner. He’d said he would pick her up at six.

  Knowing what to wear was a challenge. He’d said dinner, but not where. She’d chosen a simple summer dress with a matching cardigan. The dark pink color of both went well with her skin, and the outfit would fit in at a lot of places.

  She was oddly nervous. Or maybe the butterflies in her belly weren’t unexpected. After all, the man had declared he was “going to fight for her.” Which was perhaps amazing and romantic, but what the hell did it mean?

  Thankfully, Bertie and Bonnie had left to have drinks with Cindy. They were discussing plans to renovate the store. Just thinking about that was enough to increase Nina’s already jumpy state, but she reminded herself she had to be willing to let go or she would never be free. That she’d trapped herself in her current situation by believing her mother couldn’t possibly survive without her. If she wasn’t careful, she would find herself at the end of her life and never really having lived it at all.

  She walked into the living room just as someone knocked on the door. She opened it to find Dylan standing on the porch.

  “Hi,” he said with a smile.

  “Hi, yourself.”

  He looked good. Jeans, a long-sleeved shirt. He’d shaved recently. Definitely a man on a date, she thought, pressing a hand to her stomach.

  “I’m ready,” she said, as she reached for her bag, then closed the door behind her. “Where are we going?”

  “Mansion on the Hill.”

  “Nice.”

  Mansion on the Hill was exactly what it sounded like. The big old house had been converted into several retail spaces about twenty years ago. There was a restaurant, a flower shop, along with touristy stores.

  “How’s work?” Dylan asked as he held the door open for her.

  She slid onto the leather seat, then waited until he was next to her before answering.

  “Good. For a couple of days we thought we had a case of measles. You can imagine what a nightmare that would be. But it was a false alarm.”

  “Hives?” he asked as he started the engine.

  “Yes. Food allergies, which isn’t going to be fun for the family.”

  They chatted about their jobs until they got to the restaurant and went inside. Nina found herself alternating between talking easily with a man she’d literally known for more than a decade and feeling inexplicably nervous.

  They went inside and were shown to a corner table. They had a view of the island and upcoming sunset, yet were a little isolated from other diners.

  Nina took the offered menu, but instead of opening it, she thought about what it had been like before—when she’d been in love with Dylan. He’d been everything to her. At eighteen, she’d been dealing with graduating from high school and worrying about her little sister. Bonnie had been flighty, without Bertie’s steadying influence. There had been bills to pay and, in the back of her mind, the worry that everything would fall apart when she went away to college.

  Dylan had been her rock. They’d talked every day and had emailed even more often. When she’d started to think she couldn’t hold it together, he’d given her strength. She’d lived for their weekends. They would spend every second together, talking, studying, making love. He’d been her first time, and it had been wonderful.

  By the time they’d actually consummated their relationship, they’d been fooling around for nearly a year. They knew how to please each other in different ways. That night he’d made her come with his mouth and then had reached for a condom.

  They’d discussed what they had been about to do in detail. They’d waited until Bonnie and Averil had gone to Seattle for the weekend so they didn’t have to rush. Still, his hands had trembled, and when he’d pushed into her for the first time, he’d climaxed within five seconds.

  “What are you smiling about?” he asked, drawing her to the present.

  She hesitated for a second, then said, “Our first time.”

  He groaned. “What’s the funny part? That I lost it immediately or that you looked at me and said ‘I thought it would take longer?’”

  “Both,” she admitted. “I’ve been thinking about us a lot lately. Which is totally your fault.” She’d been planning on being more subtle in asking him what he’d meant, but realized there was no point. “Our last conversation was intense.”

  “Why? I thought I was clear.”

  “I guess I don’t know your intentions.”

  As soon as the words were out, she wanted to call them back. Instead, she pressed her lips together and told herself she was going to sit there and listen.

  Dylan studied her for a few seconds before giving her the s
mile that was designed to make her toes curl.

  “I like you,” he said, his voice low. “I enjoy spending time with you. We get along and have the same interests. I know what we had before. We’ve both grown and changed in the past decade, and I want to see if we still have the same spark.”

  “Good answer,” she murmured. “But there’s a problem.”

  One eyebrow rose. “The boy?”

  “He’s twenty-six and, no. I mean, yes, Kyle is an issue, but not the one I mean. I’m leaving the island.”

  She watched carefully, but his expression didn’t change.

  “Where are you going?”

  “I don’t know. I’m not doing an anywhere-but-here thing. I just know that I’m not happy with the choices I’ve made. I want to make different ones.”

  “Like medical school?”

  “That’s on the list.” And the most important item, even though she was frustrated by the fact that she would most likely have to wait until fall next year to get started.

  “I hope it’s at the top,” he told her. “You’ll have to work your ass off, but you’ll be a hell of a doctor. Let me know if you want to use me as a reference.”

  “You’d do that?”

  “Of course. Why would you be surprised? I care about you, Nina. That’s what this is about for me. If getting into medical school makes you happy, then I want that to happen.” He frowned. “Did you think I’d want you to stay in a place where you feel trapped?”

  “I wasn’t sure.”

  The server came and brought menus. Dylan glanced at the wine list, then ordered a bottle. When they were alone, he stretched his arms across the table and took her hands.

  “I’m not trying to trap you or change you or make you uncomfortable.”

  Words that were pretty hard to resist, she thought. “Wow. That’s nice.”

  “I’m a nice guy.” He grinned. “And a doctor. Your mom would be so proud.” He paused. “Okay, your mom wouldn’t care, but most moms would be happy.”

  She laughed.

  He released her fingers, then leaned back in his seat. “Want to hear what medical school is like?”

  She nodded eagerly. “I’ve heard it’s brutal.”

  “It is. In some ways, the first year is the worst. It’s basic science. Gross anatomy, histology, pathology, biochemistry. You learn about the body and all its systems. You’ll have a leg up on that with the knowledge you already have, but it’s still going to be grueling.”

  “Lectures and labs?” she asked.

  He nodded. “Plenty of both. And there’s reading. Lots of reading.”

  * * *

  By the time they were done with dinner and walking out to his car, Nina felt she had more of a grasp of what to expect if she got into medical school. She was also very conscious of the man moving next to her.

  Dylan had answered all her questions, but more than that, he’d been enthusiastic about her chances of getting through the exhausting four years. He’d been totally supportive of her becoming a doctor, which was great, but also baffling. She simply couldn’t reconcile his saying he was fighting for her with the ease with which he seemed to be encouraging her to go for her dreams.

  He’d parked at the far end of the lot. The passenger side was in shadows, and as they reached his car, he stopped and drew her close. As he lowered his head, she raised hers. Their lips touched. He tasted of wine and the mint chocolate cake they’d shared.

  She let herself lean into him and wrapped her arms around his neck, then gave herself over to his kiss. His tongue brushed her bottom lip before slipping inside.

  She and Dylan had made love hundreds of times in every way possible. She knew what he liked...or at least she knew what he had liked. Time had a way of changing a person. She knew she was different than she’d been at eighteen.

  The realization excited her more. She wanted to touch him and explore the changes. She wanted to find out if she could still make him catch his breath, still make him tremble and cry out her name.

  She rubbed her breasts against his chest and breathed his name.

  He drew back and looked into her eyes. Desire burned there. Desire and something she thought might be regret.

  He reached behind his neck and gently took her wrists in his hands then brought her arms to her sides. “I should get you home.”

  She stared at him, unable to believe he was doing this. Then she remembered his promise not to sleep with her while she was still with Kyle.

  Chagrin made her turn away, even as the logical side of her brain admitted she would feel the same way if she were him. But the rest of her was unamused by the turn of events.

  “Home sounds good,” she lied.

  * * *

  “I do love these little sticky notes,” Bertie said, pointing to the skinny strip with the arrow printed on it. “So convenient.”

  Nina stared at the stack of paperwork. “I guess you really did visit a lawyer.”

  “We did and the visit was excellent. She was very patient and explained everything we needed to know.” Bertie smiled. “She was very pretty and flirted with Ambrose, which I think both pleased him and made him a little uncomfortable. Next up for us is a meeting with the auction house and the financial planners.”

  “You’re getting this together.”

  They sat at the kitchen table in the house. Around them were the familiar trappings of their life. Everything was as it had been for years, yet there was the promise of something different just beyond the horizon.

  “We are on plan,” Bertie said cheerfully. “Your mother and I made a list of everything that has to be done, and now we’re working our way through it.”

  “Really?” Nina asked with a grin. “My mom is checking items off on a list?”

  “All right. Maybe I’m more the list driver, but she’s listening. I think she sees how important this is to all of us.” Bertie’s humor faded. “She was very concerned about Averil’s time here. That she was responsible for the unhappiness in their marriage.”

  Talk about unexpected, Nina thought. “She had nothing to do with that. Averil had to find her own way.” Or maybe just grow up a little more.

  “Despite what you think, your mother is very aware of her flaws,” Bertie said. “She knows she wasn’t there for you and Averil. You did an excellent job with what you had, Nina, but you were a child yourself. Bonnie feels that both of you are paying for her inability to act in a way appropriate to her role.”

  Her role? “You mean being a mother?”

  Bertie nodded.

  Nina did her best to accept the information calmly, but she found herself wanting to snap back that while this was all fine and good, hearing it from Bonnie would mean a lot. After that happened, a flock of pigs would fly by.

  “I’m glad she’s concerned about following through on all this,” Nina said, because she didn’t want to fight with Bertie. She motioned to the paperwork. “I honestly can’t imagine her sitting through a meeting with a lawyer.”

  “She did very well. I was so proud.” Bertie smiled. “You would have been, too. Now, let’s get you signed up for your trust.”

  Bertie passed over paperwork, and Nina read it. The forms were pretty straightforward. Once the trust was funded, Nina would be able to draw up to sixty thousand dollars a year until the trust was depleted.

  The amount was so ridiculously high that she nearly giggled as she signed. Sixty thousand dollars? Who had that much money? It was impossible to imagine. Yet once the painting sold, the fees, commissions and taxes were paid, the four of them would be splitting just over six million dollars. She would have a million dollars in her trust, as would Averil. Bertie and Bonnie were keeping the rest. The sisters had jointly insisted on that.

  “We have our meetings with the auction house in a few weeks. We’re flying to New York for that,” Bertie said. “I can’t remember when we’re meeting the financial planner, but it’s on my calendar.”

  Nina continued to sign where the stic
ky-note arrows told her to. “What about the house?” she asked.

  Bertie raised her eyebrows. “Is this your way of saying we need a new roof? I’ve already called for estimates. We’re going to replace the carpeting, too. Your mother is saying we should redo the bathrooms, but I like them as they are. We’re still deciding.”

  “You’re going to stay here? I thought you might want to move to Seattle or somewhere else.”

  Bertie shook her head. “This is home. We are going to get a new van, though. A bigger one so we can bring home more treasures.” The smile returned. “And we’re talking about going to Hawaii once all this is settled.”

  Nina waited, but that seemed to be all. “Life will just go on as it did before?” she asked. “Even with millions of dollars in the bank.”

  “Especially because of that. We’re happy the way things are. Too much change would jeopardize that.”

  Nina nodded and continued to sign, but on the inside, her head began to spin. Averil had returned to Kevin, because she wanted the life they had. Her mother and Bertie, upon going from barely making it to having a couple of million dollars each, were going to buy a van and get new carpeting.

  She put down the pen.

  “What?” Bertie asked. “Are you all right?”

  Nina didn’t know if she should laugh or burst into tears. “I was so worried about having to hold everything together,” she admitted. “But nothing has changed, has it? Despite my concerns and craziness, I was never in charge.”

  “You did like the illusion.”

  Nina groaned. “So much wasted energy.”

  “You cared. There’s a difference.”

  “Is there? Maybe if I’d let go sooner, it all would have worked out sooner.”

  “Or we would have all been lost. You can’t rewrite history, child. You can only learn from it and move on.”

  Nina stretched out her hand across the table. Bertie took it and squeezed her fingers.

  “I’m going to miss you so much,” Nina said.

  “Because you’re leaving?”

  She thought about the view of the island from the plane and all the dreams she’d let die. She thought of where she wanted to be in ten years. In twenty.