Sirens of DemiMonde

by N. Godwin

  “Sit down, sweetie,” Eunice says catching my hand as I try to leave. I sit down and she squeezes my hand. “It’s been an eventful summer so far hasn’t it?” she says, dabbing her eyes with her Kleenex.

  “So far so good,” I say, grateful for this truth.

  “Our kids are amazing this time aren’t they? Remarkable what little ones can teach us,” Eunice says. “I’m thinking maybe Cecile and Kelly have taught you even more than you’ve taught them.”

  “You think?” I kid.

  “Look at you, you’re glowing! And, Jimmy-Sue, you’re touching!” she says as she entwines her fingers with mine.

  “I am.” I smile at her and squeeze back, ignoring the static shocks in her touch and trying to feel down beyond the initial pain, trying to feel what lies beneath. I can feel her affection for me. I can feel her heart beating in her wrist as she holds my hand and smiles. “I’m learning to be still and listen better,” I say, smiling back.

  “And even Lavelle is shaping up.”

  “He hasn’t stolen anything in seven days.”

  “Well, not that we know about,” she says and we both laugh. She stops laughing suddenly and frowns over my head.

  “Okay, what’s up?” I ask.

  “Well now,” she says, “you know I’m not one to pry.”

  “Uh huh,” I allow with a grin.

  “But see, it’s Horst.”

  “What about him?”

  “Now, let me finish all I’m going to say then you can answer. It’s just…he loves you dearly and he has such a tender heart.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “And this Commander… person, this Rawly, he disturbs me.”

  “Yeah,” I laugh, “me, too.”

  “I mean it, sweetie! I can look at that man and see he’s completely mad over you.”

  “And?”

  “And it scares me! He’s different, he’s predatory and calculating. He’s not the kind of man any woman ever gets used to, or forgets. His needs are… can be… He has needs, Jimmy-Sue and he knows things, deep powerful secrets that could shatter a lesser soul.” She stops and looks off over my head as if retrieving an ancient memory. We sit in silence for a minute, maybe two. “Rawly won’t play your games for very long.”

  “I don’t play games.”

  “Well then you need to start because you’re strategy isn’t working! A young woman needs to spread her wings and test the waters before she can learn to fly, so she better learn how to play a few necessary games for survival. How else are you going find your center if you don’t give in and experiment before it’s too late?”

  “I don’t like anything about that scary man, Eunice and I’m never ever-ever going to sleep with him if that’s what you mean,” I all but laugh as I withdraw my hand because her touch is exhausting.

  “I’m just afraid any game Rawly plays with you will be for keeps. I’m not just talking about sex. I’m talking about here,” she says patting her heart. “He’s got one, Jimmy-Sue, that’s plain to see. And I don’t think you know how to get rid of him when the time is right.”

  “How do I get rid of him? I’ve tried everything and he just keeps coming back for more, like a cockroach. He’s infuriating!” I find myself almost shouting.

  “Use your noggin and fall in love with someone else. Or even just pretend to love someone else, someone—well, say like Horst for instance,” she says nodding conspiratorially. “Rawly’s got pride, lots of it. That’s where I’d aim my weapon to get rid of that beast.”

  “He doesn’t believe I’m capable,” I say, “of falling in love, I mean, so I don’t see how your sad strategy could possibly work.”

  “Are you capable of falling in love, Jimmy-Sue?” she asks softly.

  I laugh. “I’ll tell you if I ever find out.”

  “Oh, I just hope it’s with someone less alarming, someone tender and nice. Like, Horst for instance. You know he just--.”

  I smile as she rattles off virtue after virtue. I smile and pat her hand.

  Secrets

  “Whoa!” Ken says swooping by my counter. “You look righteous! Hot date tonight?”

  “Torrid,” I joke.

  “I’m going to have to start guarding the front door with a shotgun,” Hobie adds as he gives me a thumbs-up.

  I shake my head at them and laugh as I slip the apron over my head and tie it around me, then reach for the blender. I am humming and dancing along with the music as I dump bananas, mangoes, carrots and kiwis into the brand new stainless steel blender.

  It’s an easy enough night and everyone is in a good mood. Day twelve of Lavelle with no sticky fingers, Genie had a breakthrough session with Marvin, Kelly has been extremely affectionate, Cecile finger painted her first apple tree, and Randy is still pouting because Ali went back to Tennessee and is still refusing to speak to him. I’m almost afraid to jinx myself. Dare I say it? What the heck, it’s been a perfect day.

  “Rawly!” the Halflings shout as he walks through the front door surrounded by only four of his men tonight.

  I notice he is dressed in khaki cargo pants and a beige t-shirt with a skeleton of a frog and the words The Only Easy Day Was Yesterday written across his brawny chest. His men are dressed from head to toe in black and all are without their nametags this evening.

  “I was just thinking about you,” I say to Rawly, swaying to the music as they sit down at my counter.

  “Moi?” Rawly replies as he looks around the café in mock surprise. “Am I in the right place? Did you just say hello? Are you smiling at me?” he says and points to his chest.

  “Shut up and drink this,” I order as I slide him a frosted mug of my frozen creation.

  Looking at me suspiciously, he lifts the glass to his mouth then takes a slow deliberate drink. “Is it poisoned?” he asks.

  “I didn’t realize that was an option.”

  “It’s good,” he says and smiles at me, “real good.”

  “Yeah,” I giggle, “I call it happy mush.”

  “Uh huh,” he says and slares at me as I sway back and forth to the song and snap my fingers to the beat. “Is there… liquor in here?” he asks as he smells his happy mush.

  “Nope, just good clean health. Hey, y’all want some?”

  “Naw.”

  “I’ll pass.”

  “Give me a brewski, babes,” Salazar says and winks at Andrea as she looks heavenward.

  “What’s with you?” Rawly asks, squinting suspiciously at me.

  “I’m just high on life, Commander.”

  He leans his chin in his hand and surveys me critically. “Something’s different about you. What have you done, Helen?”

  I meet his eyes and feel my cheeks blushing because this warrior can usually read my mind, and if he only knew what I’d done he’d be shocked. I smile at this because sometimes life is just downright silly, so I give in and take his bait. “I got a haircut,” I say looking away as I flip my hair over the front of my shoulders.

  “Turn around,” he motions. “Let me see.” I do an exaggerated spin for him and strike a pose then turn back around slowly, almost giggling for God knows why. “That’s lovely. I like how you’ve twisted up part of your hair in the back and let the rest fall down your back and around your shoulders and face. Very chic,” he says still studying me. “Are you taller?”

  “Uh huh,” I say and sit across the bar from him on my stool. His face contorts in surprise when I lift my legs up and stretch them out luxuriously down the bar between us, showing off my new black leather heels. “See. You like? Makes me much taller... Hum? Maybe I should try dancing in four inch heels next time?”

  “That would depend on who you’re dancing with,” Rawly replies.

  “Ooh, the possibilities,” I muse as I stare into space, imagining the possibilities.

  Alvarez is leaning his whole body forward trying to see up my dress. Rawly pushes him firmly back down in his stool while the other SEALs laugh and whistle.

  “See th
ese little muscles forming on my calves? Look, they’ve actually got some definition.” I say proudly pointing them out.

  “Looks like definition to me,” Salazar deadpans. “What do you think, Mother?”

  “What are you doing?” Rawly asks squinting his eyes at me suspiciously.

  “Damn, I need a woman!” McBain laments.

  “I’m only showing you my new shoes and my new muscles forming,” I answer casually as I swing my legs back down behind the counter. “Oh, and look at this. See my arms? They’ve got a little definition going on here! I know it’s not anything like you guys are used to but on me--”

  “On you it’s gorgeous!” Salazar gushes.

  “Let me feel that muscle,” McBain laughs as he leans forward to squeeze my arm. “Yep, she’s getting pumped, Mother,” he jokes. “Pretty soon she’ll be throwing your butt on the mat.”

  “Too late,” I giggle.

  “Have you been smoking anything?” Rawly asks.

  “No, never,” I say then lean in close and whisper to him. “Actually, one time I did ask Ken for some and he about had a stroke. I was only joking but--” I can’t help but laugh from the tender image.

  “I can imagine,” Rawly whispers back. “Are those pearls under your apron?”

  “Will you stop staring at me like I’m possessed or something, it’s downright spooky!” I laugh as he frowns.

  I notice his bottom lip still has a slight remnant of a scab from where I’d bitten him almost two weeks ago. I have no idea why this would make me smile. I reach out my finger and gently touch the scab on his lip. I feel Jezebel, I feel electric, giddy and … and again there is no sting, and I-- Wow!

  Rawly startles when my finger touches his mouth and his reaction makes me smile. I feel odd somehow, a Delilah, a betrayal to something, a testament maybe, because realizing that my touch surprises him is… delicious.

  Where is that coming from? I want to kick him in his shins as hard as I can! And all I can do when I realize this is… smile… Eunice is right; this is relatively easy if I put some thought into it. Maybe Eunice is right and watching a man melt does have certain merits in a seriously wicked way? Or maybe it’s just watching this particular man tremble at my touch is what’s so powerful, because something powerful is happening at this very moment.

  And right here, right now, I can feel the earth shifting into a new gear and I tilt my head listening as the hum of its engine kicks in. This is intriguing and I decide to explore the possibilities further.

  “Oh, poor baby,” I taunt and probe as my finger strokes his lip. “Does it still hurt?”

  Rawly opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. His face is flushed and I gloat over his reaction because it feels good to be able to surprise the man with the amazing intuition. I pull my hand back as he raises his hand and strokes his lip where my finger had been.

  I haven’t been up close and personal with Rawly in over two weeks. Ever since our evening of manual combat he has cautiously kept his distance, regrouping and surveying the enemy territory from afar. For two weeks now one of his men has taken me through my training. Salazar and Edwards ride the bike with me, Singerman, McBain and Rodriquez take turns pacing me in running and swimming, and Washington is teaching me really cool kung fu moves, all without touching me.

  I can always spot Rawly where ever we go because he doesn’t even try to hide, just constantly keeps his silent vigil from far away. Personally, I think his keeping away from me has been just peachy; figuring we both needed a breather on account of his low tolerance for spandex and all.

  Still, it seems funny to me that I should notice a difference in him as well, and I’m studying him to nail it down; more reserved, more suspicious and uncomfortable even, maybe? Right now he seems less intimidating, almost human to me, and yet I couldn’t say why.

  Make no mistake, Harold Hawkings VI is definitely lethal and brilliant, and he truly could be, and probably is, Satan himself, but something is different. I study him and for the first time he seems hesitant to meet my eyes.

  A revelation sweeps over me. What if this change wasn’t in him? What if I was the one who had somehow rotated again ever so slightly? What if I’m the one with the most power now?

  For the love of--Will you just stop it?

  I close my eyes and strain to feel any difference around me. I hold my breath and strain harder until I see spots behind my eyes, and swear I can detect something in the very ground beneath my feet, something different, lighter as if maybe some heavy shackle had been removed.

  “Are you playing a joke on me?” Rawly asks angrily. “Has someone bet you some money to--”

  “It’s just the craziest thing,” I explain to all of them. “Okay, I know this is going to sound really… I don’t know—silly I guess, but see, this morning I rolled over in bed all stiff and soar from sparring with Washington here, and just felt…tingly all over. Like I was caressed, given… No…No. I can’t say it right!” I am momentarily flustered. “Anyway, I noticed these muscles on my calves and arms and…never mind, while I was taking an hour long bubble bath. I mean, me taking an hour-long bath and singing! And, well, I just felt all powerful and warm and in my skin. I know it sounds mushy to y’all but it feels so good feeling this!”

  The guys are all just staring at me in various degrees of shock.

  “I feel pretty too,” Andrea says stepping up next to me and putting her arms around my shoulders. She begins to sing: “I feel pretty. I feel pretty.”

  I put my arm around her and sing along: “I’ll feel pretty and witty and gay and I pity any girl who isn’t me today,” we both burst out singing then laughing because neither of us can remember any more of the words. We don’t care, we swing each other around and laugh and hum loudly.

  “You feel sexy is what you feel,” Washington offers after our dance has stopped. “You feel sexy and it shows.”

  “Sexy?” I curl my lip around the word.

  “Yeah, feel like you want to crank up the music and dance till dawn?” he asks as I nod. “Like nothing or nobody would dare tell you no?”

  “Yeah,” I gush.

  “That’s how sexy feels.”

  “Sexy,” Salazar agrees nodding his head.

  “Yep, definitely sexy,” McBain concurs.

  “Oh?” I say softly and stand still, contemplating this concept. “Is that bad, slutty or something?”

  “No!” they all say shaking their heads, all except Rawly who continues to stare at me oddly.

  “All right, what’s the matter with you? Did someone run over your puppy?” I ask as I untie my apron and slip it over my head.

  “What gives with you, Helen—my God!” he gasps as I lay the apron on the counter between us. “Look at you! That dress is--”

  “Do you like it?” I frown slightly looking down at my new little black dress. It is one of those five in a lifetime dresses that hugs every curve of your body in all the right places without being too obvious. I run my hands over the fabric. “I don’t know, maybe it’s the dress that makes me feel…sexy? Is it too low cut?”

  “No way!”

  “To low cut for whom?” Rawly asks.

  “Well, like say for your mother. What would she think if she were meeting me for the first time and I wore this dress? Would she think I was—I mean, would she think it was too— just look at it and tell me what you think,” I say spinning slowly around.

  “She would probably ask to borrow it,” Rawly answers softly when I stop and face him.

  “It’s not too short?”

  “I wouldn’t wear it to church, Washington offers.”

  “Especially not her church,” Hobie cuts in as my face falls.

  “You look ravishing,” Rawly says and finally relaxes enough to smile. “I can’t get over how different you look tonight.”

  “You look different, too. I mean, you look different from your men. You’re not in uniform and they’re dressed all in black. Hey guys, what gives?” I ask them. />
  “Don’t tell her,” Rawly warns.

  “Ooh, tell me,” I coax, batting my eye lashes at them. I lean against the bar and rest my chin on my hands and beg them. “Please, oh please, oh please.”

  “He told us not to,” Washington laughs.

  “Yes, but he didn’t order it,” I say as I reach over and cover Rawly’s mouth with my hand. Again he seems startled by my touch. He opens his mouth and gently bites the skin on my palm. I ignore it anyway. “I didn’t hear him give a direct order, boys, did you?”

  “Nah, I didn’t hear one either,” McBain agrees with a laugh.

  “Me, either,” Salazar says and motions me into him with a curl of his finger. “We’re on breeder patrol tonight.”

  “Breeder patrol, what’s that?”

  The guys look at each other and start to laugh. Rawly looks up at the ceiling and moans through my hand. “Well, see--” Salazar begins but can’t finish.

  “We go out patrolling for breeders on the beach,” Alvarez tells me. “You know, guys and girls doin’ the nasty.”

  “Horizontal in the sand,” McBain chuckles as my hand drops from Rawly’s mouth.

  “Oh,” I say. “People, you mean, doing…that here, on our beach?”

  “Yes, Ma’am.”

  “Right out in front of God and everybody?” I ask incredulously.

  “Like a couple of dogs in heat.”

  “Well, it is dark,” Washington offers.

  “Yeah, and they do think they’re alone,” Salazar agrees and exchanges meaningful eye contact with the other SEALs.

  “Fools!” they laugh.

  “Here?” I ask again just to make certain. “Like, just across the street?”

  “Yes, Ma’am.”

  Alvarez hits his pockets and panics a moment. “Hey, who brought the infra red camera?”

  “Me.” Three sets of hands go up.

  “You… take pictures?” I squeak out.

  “Sometimes they make it to the internet,” Salazar says proudly.