The Missing Pieces

by H. S. Strickland

  I readily agreed, and took my shirt off. I was secretly so glad that I had decided to wear one of my sexy bras today.

  His hungry eyes took in my almost naked form. I watched in amazement as his eyes got even hungrier. He was so ready for this but I wasn’t sure that I was.

  “Stop,” I mumbled, looking down at my naked chest and covering it up.

  “What’s wrong?” Ryan asked coming to sit by my side, but not before I noticed the grimace of pain on his face.

  I picked at the blanket that was covering me, and avoided his eyes. “I…just don’t know if I’m ready yet.”

  I wasn’t hearing anything coming out of Ryan’s mouth so I looked up, nervous that he was going to be pissed at me for stopping right in the heat of things.

  When my gaze met his, he wasn’t pissed or upset with me. His eyes were full of understanding, and something else that I wasn’t ready to admit.

  “I will never force you to have sex with me, Sloane. The only time we are going to have sex is when you’re ready, and you want to. I will not force it on you and I won’t guilt trip you into it. I’m not mad at you, baby. If you wanted to stop, that was your right.” He kissed me on my forehead, and gazed back into my eyes intently.

  “I don’t want to keep doing that to you,” I threw my hand out toward his obvious painfully hard dick.

  “Don’t worry about me. Worry about yourself. I can handle having blue balls, what I can’t handle is you telling me you’re ready for sex just to please me.”

  I leaned in and kissed his mouth tenderly. He was such an amazing man, and I loved the secret gentle side to him.

  “I am, however, going to need a cold shower. Be right back.” He kissed me on the temple and walked to the bathroom, shedding his clothes along the way.

  I sat on the bed, Indian style, and thought about what just happened. When we came into the condo, I was ready to have sex with him. I wanted it so much. What happened between there and the bedroom? My doubts filling my head that was what got in the way. I was wondering if my doubts were because of my job, or because of my own feelings. I believed that I was trying to protect the ice around my heart more than I was trying to protect my job. Sex had nothing to do with the job and everything to do with guarding my heart.

  There was going to come a point in my life where I had to give up the armor, and let someone in. I was going to have to tell them about my job. About what happened to me as a child. I wanted that person to be Ryan. I wanted to tell him everything, so bad. After this was over, I was going back to Boss and telling him I couldn’t do it anymore. Couldn’t pretend to be someone else. I was going to quit so I could be with my family and make a life with Ryan.

  Having made up my mind, I got off the bed and stripped out of my clothes. I grabbed two towels out of the linen closet in the hallway. I opened the bathroom door quietly. I didn’t want Ryan to know I was in the bathroom until I was stepping into the shower with him.

  “Ah fuck,” I heard Ryan groan.

  Thankfully for me, the shower had a glass wall and it was see through. I could see him stroking his hard cock and his head titled back in pleasure. After seeing that I was pretty sure I could feel my arousal running down my leg. It was embarrassing to admit that it was such a turn on watching Ryan stroke himself.

  I slid the glass door back and took great pleasure in the look on Ryan’s face when I walked in the shower. He was surprised, but more embarrassed that I had caught him.

  “Please continue,” I panted.

  A flash of surprise crossed his face, but he did as I had asked and started stroking himself again. I watched, enraptured with the way his hand moved and the bead of pre-come leaking out of his tip.

  “Fuck yourself with your fingers,” Ryan rasped, fisting himself harder.

  I was scared at first to dip my fingers in my pussy, but the look in Ryan’s eyes said not to test him. I slid my hands down my stomach, down towards my mound, and through my lips. I dipped my finger inside myself and gasped at how wet I was. I inserted another finger in myself and moaned at the intense feelings flowing through my body.

  “Does it feel good?” Ryan growled, stroking himself faster.

  I nodded my head, but didn’t give him an audible answer.

  “Answer me.”

  “Yes,” I moaned.

  “Does it feel as good as when my fingers are in you?” He asked.

  I shook my head, and groaned, “No.”

  “Come here,” Ryan rumbled.

  I stumbled to him, surprising myself at the ability to walk. I crashed into him, and he held me up. He gazed at my heavy breasts, and tweaked my nipples. I threw my head back, and almost came from the contact alone.

  “Tell me what you want.”

  “I want you,” I mumbled. His hand went from my breast around to my back and down to my ass. I wanted more from him. I needed more.

  “I need you to be more specific,” he whispered somewhere close to my ear.

  “I want you inside of me,” I whispered back.

  “What changed your mind?” He asked, shocked.

  “You did. I realized that I was guarding my heart from you by not having sex. I also realized that I don’t have to guard my heart around you.” I told him, looking in his eyes so he could see the truth in them.

  “You sure about this?” He asked, his eyes growing hungry again.

  “Positive.” I grinned.

  “Well baby, I’ll give you slow in a little bit. Right now I’m gonna take you in this shower, and it’s going to be hard and fast,” he growled. I whimpered.

  I wanted it hard and fast. I wanted him to fuck me, and then make love to me.

  “Turn around, brace your hands on the wall.” I complied and felt the water hit my ass when he moved from underneath the spray. It was hot, but felt good.

  I felt Ryan’s hands grip my hips firmly, and then felt his cock between my butt cheeks. I tensed up and shied away.

  “I’m not going there baby, at least not tonight. Come back here.” He chuckled, and lightly tugged my hips back to his. I went willingly and again felt his cock.

  He nudged my opening with his head, and slowly started grinding his hips into me. This felt different than the first time we had fucked. I felt like there was more emotion behind it this time. I felt more sensations as his cock entered me. I felt whole. I felt like the piece of me that I had been missing since I was 14 had finally returned home.

  Ryan reared his hips back, and slammed inside of me. I barely contained the scream that was begging to be let loose.

  “So fucking wet,” Ryan groaned from behind me.

  The only noise in the room was the shower, and our wet skin slapping together. I could feel his balls slapping against me and it only fueled my arousal. I pushed my ass back against him to get him further in me, and whimpered.

  I felt one of Ryan’s hands leave my hip and reach around to my clit. He put a light amount of pressure on it, but it was enough to make me explode. My body went limp with my orgasm, and my vision briefly went black. I could vaguely make out the sounds of my screams and his groans as he came inside me. Ryan thrust a few more times, prolonging my orgasm.

  When my euphoria had subsided I sagged against the shower wall, and Ryan picked me up. He stepped out of the shower and found the towels I had set down on the sink when I walked in here. He grabbed one, and set me on the counter. He wrapped it around his waist, then took the other one and wrapped it around my body. He then picked me up again and carried me into the bedroom and set me on the bed.

  After he covered me up with the comforter he dried himself off, and found a pair of briefs out of the dresser. He turned back around and caught me staring. “You like the show?” He smirked.

  I nodded lazily, and continued staring as he put his briefs. I thought briefs on a man were incredibly sexy. It showcased all the muscles in their thighs, and of course highlighted their dick. I enjoyed seeing them on Ryan.

  He crawled into bed with me and tugged me a
gainst his chest. I threw my leg over his thigh and laid my head against his chest and listened to his heart beating.

  “Thank you,” he whispered to the top of my head a few minutes later.

  “For what?”

  “Trusting me. Letting your guard down. All of it.” He kissed the crown of my head and inhaled sharply.

  I couldn’t say anything, so I just nodded. I was happy to have let my guard down long enough to let him in. It felt nice. He was the first person I had let my guard down with and I trusted that he would treasure that. I was sure he knew I didn’t do it often, and liked that I did with him.

  I eventually heard his breath even out, indicating he had fallen asleep. Not too long after I followed suit. Before I fell asleep I remember thinking that I had fallen in love with Ryan. I had finally allowed my heart to open up enough and fell in love with an amazing man. I was just too scared to admit it out loud.

  Chapter Eight

  Ryan

  I woke up to a pounding in my head. I didn’t think it was a headache considering I wasn’t drinking last night, and I rarely got headaches otherwise. Finally my senses came to me, and I realized that the pounding wasn’t in my head, but the front door.

  I gazed at the sleeping woman next to me, and smiled. She was such a beautiful sight. If I could get away with it I would stare at her all day. Instead I had to get up at…eight in the morning to answer the impatient person behind my door.

  I moved my arm as carefully as possible so I didn’t wake Sloane and crept out of bed. I pulled on some sweatpants and looked back at Sloane. She had shifted and was now lying on my pillow, cuddling it to her.

  I quickly moved to the front door so whoever was banging didn’t wake Sloane up. She would be pretty pissed, considering she isn’t a morning person at all.

  Once again, I got the surprise of my life when I opened the door. My mother was standing there looking almost as bad as Farrah did when she was here yesterday.

  “What do you want?” This time I didn’t make the mistake of opening the door wider and letting her in like I did with Farrah. My mother was a mean woman, and she could do ten times the damage to Sloane’s face. Although I didn’t want her in my home I was curious as to why she was here. I hadn’t talked to her in a few years because of the drugs.

  “I just want to talk to my son,” she smiled and I barely hid the cringe. Her teeth were rotting and some were even missing.

  “We haven’t talked in years, so why the sudden interest in me?” I asked, quirking an eyebrow.

  She looked down at her feet and then back up at me. “That’s why I want to talk; I’m tired of not having my baby boy around.” She whispered, tears glistening her eyes.

  I opened the door wider, and let her pass by. I shut and locked the door behind her then turned around and watched as my mother looked around my house in amazement.

  “You’ve done really well for yourself.” She said in awe.

  “My job pays well.” I told her. I gestured for her to take a seat at the island.

  “Can I get you anything to drink or eat?” I asked, politely.

  “Do you have coffee?” She asked timidly.

  I nodded and went about making a pot of coffee. I knew I would need it for whatever conversation we would be having, plus Sloane would eventually hear the noise in here and want some.

  “So how have you been doing?” She questioned.

  “I’ve been doing okay. Got myself a good job after I got out of the Marines, with a buddy of mine. I found a woman that I really like,” I told her, sitting down next to her in Sloane’s stool.

  “Well that’s really good.” She nodded and looked around nervously.

  “Was there a different reason you came here for?” I asked. I could sense it in her nervousness that she wasn’t here to make idle chit-chat and catch up with her son. She wanted something.

  She nodded her head yes and opened her mouth, but didn’t get anything out before I hear the shuffling of feet coming out of the hallway. Sloane was dressed in one of my shirts, and thankfully and put a pair of shorts on underneath. She was dragging herself down the hallway, and hadn’t even opened up her eyes to notice we had a guest.

  I stood up and walked over to her. When my arms connected around her she screamed and jumped back a few steps.

  “What the hell, Ryan? You know I’m jumpy in the mornings!” She yelled and playfully smacked me on the chest.

  I cleared my throat, and told her in a low whisper, “My mother is here for a visit.”

  Her head snapped up, and at first I thought I saw a flash of anger in her eyes, but it was gone before I could tell. She ran back to the bedroom, presumably to change.

  I sat back down at the island and looked at my mother. She had a hard look on her face and was gazing back at the hallway where Sloane had disappeared.

  “You’ll have to excuse her. She’s a little grumpy in the mornings,” I smiled. She smiled back, but it didn’t reach her eyes. There was something else behind them, but I couldn’t tell what it was. She kept it hidden very well.

  Sloane came back into the kitchen dressed in jeans and a T-shirt. She had a smile on her face, and was looking straight at my mother.

  Guess she doesn’t need coffee.

  “Hi, it’s really nice to meet you. I’m Sloane, Ryan’s girlfriend.” She stuck her hand out to shake my mother’s, and thankfully my mother took Sloane’s hand. They had a silent conversation with their eyes and I couldn’t see it, but it was really weird.

  My mother retracted her hand first and said, “It’s a pleasure to meet you as well. Please call me Mary.” She smiled.

  “I am so sorry about earlier, Mary. I’m just not a morning person, and when I am up early I’m a zombie until I get my coffee.” She said this while moving to the coffee pot and pouring three cups.

  “How would you like yours, Mary?” Sloane asked sweetly, finishing up her own cup.

  “Black, please.” My mother replied in just as sweet of a voice.

  “I see where Ryan gets his preference from.” She turned with two of the cups, grinning. She set one of the cups down in front of me and one down in front of my mother.

  “Ah yes. In a lot of ways, he is exactly like me.” She smirked over the rim of the cup.

  “Well I’m going to take a shower and give you two some alone time,” Sloane said. She came around to my side, and kissed me on the forehead.

  “It was lovely to meet you.” She said to my mother and smiled.

  “Likewise,” Mom said.

  Sloane scurried out of the room and a few seconds later I heard the shower turn on. I didn’t understand why she was out of here so fast. She didn’t even have time to take a few sips of her coffee, which was completely unusual.

  “She’s a nice girl,” Mom almost sneered.

  “And I see you are saying that with sarcasm.” I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. It was too fucking early for this. Mom was going to try and get me to break up with Sloane because she didn’t like her for some half-cocked reason.

  Well guess what mom you’re in for a surprise because I didn’t give a shit what she thought anymore. She had lost all the rights to help me make decisions in my life whenever she forgot she had a son due to the drugs. And again when she got my girlfriend hooked on fucking crack.

  “You’re damn right I am. I don’t like that girl one bit.” She snarled.

  “Well guess what mom? I don’t give a shit that you don’t like her,” I said, turning so I could look at her face.

  She had a shocked look, and her hand was on her heart as if it were breaking. It probably would be if she had a fucking heart.

  “What? How could you not care? Isn’t your mother’s opinion valuable to you?” She asked, astonished.

  “It was valuable to me, until you picked up the fucking drugs and forgot that I even existed. Your opinion became even more invaluable whenever you got my fucking girlfriend hooked on crack,” I yelled. She flinched away from me and stood up.


  “I didn’t get her hooked! She did that herself!”

  “Oh don’t act like you didn’t play an important role in her getting addicted.”

  “I give her one hit of it, and she was the one that wanted more!”

  “But pressuring her for months before that was nothing? You should have never even been around her. I was fucking stupid for thinking that you wouldn’t do some shit like that. If I didn’t have a good head on my shoulders then you would have offered me some of that shit!”

  She gasped dramatically, “That is a lie!”

  I took a step back and started for the door. “It is not a damn lie, and you know it. Now please leave.”

  She huddled toward the door all the while speaking, “I can’t believe you would think that of me. I offered it to her because she was having some issues. Speaking of which, you need to get back together with that girl. Her depression is getting worse and she misses you. It would make her better if you ended it with Sloane, and started seeing Farrah again. She needs you, Ryan.”

  She didn’t say another word and I closed the door in her face. I didn’t want to hear anything else she was saying. She was wrong. Things would not get better for Farrah if I was with her. I would just be hounding her to get off the drugs, and she would keep refusing.

  Sloane

  When I walked away from Ryan and his mother Mary, I told them I was going to take a shower, but I was actually calling Jeremy to find out where Farrah was. Luckily, he gave me some good news and told me she wasn’t far from Mary’s house and was doing a deal. He snapped pictures of the dealers that were there, and was waiting on me to meet up with him. I had asked him to go ahead and send the pictures to Boss to see if we could get an I.D. on the guys.

  I didn’t get in the shower until I had heard the fighting in the kitchen/living room stop. Afterwards I rushed through a shower and was putting on my clothes when Ryan walked into the bedroom looking distraught.

  I walked over to his side of the bed where he had sat down and asked, “What’s wrong, Lover Boy?”

  He smiled up at me, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Just had a huge fight with my mom,” he shook his head and blew out a pent up breath.