All for Maddie

by Jettie Woodruff

  I chugged my beer, making the guzzling sound, clearly audible. “Oh yes, but I can,” I promised. “Did you tell my dad you were going to pay off my house?”

  “Yes.”

  “You’re not.”

  “Too late. I had the money transferred before I talked to him about it. I paid it off last Monday.”

  “What the fuck, Alex? You’re really starting to piss me off. I don’t need you to pay off my house. I am perfectly capable of that myself.”

  “No, you’re not. I want you home, raising our daughter, taking her to preschool, ballerina classes, gymnastics, and whatever else she wants to do. I have to work. I’m not going to be able to do it all.”

  “I’m working,” I assured him. No way was he holding that shit over my head. He had all the control he was getting.

  “No, you’re not.”

  “Yes. I. Am.”

  “No. You. Are. Not.”

  “You can’t tell me what to do. I’m not your property. Who the hell do you think you are? You come here, threatening to take my daughter, you take her for a couple of days and realize, oh, she does need her mommy, decide I’ll just force her to move in with me, pay off my house, and now you think you’re going to tell me that I can’t support my daughter and me? You’re crazy. You need to be committed.”

  “You’re not working. I am perfectly capable of taking care of my family.”

  “I’m not your fucking family. You fucking raped me.” I was going to kill this guy. I couldn’t live with him. I couldn’t. I would end up in prison and Maddie would be raised by my dad. Hmmm. That might be the best alternative I had thought of yet.

  “When we are in public, around my family or yours, we will be a family. You can stay on the other side of the house when we are home, but around other people, we are a family.”

  It was hopeless. My life was over. I was at the mercy of a lunatic. “You’re not allowed to kiss me. What the hell was up with that?”

  “You can suck it up around people. It wouldn’t hurt for you to be a little warmer towards me around Maddie either. You don’t want her thinking her mommy hates her daddy.”

  “Yes, I do.”

  Alex snickered, placed his hand on my knee, and stood up. “I’ll leave you to your party.”

  I did have a party. I sat there and drank seven of the twelve beers. I wasn’t as drunk as the night before, but I was feeling it. I sat in Mother Nature, cherishing the sounds of the dark night, contemplating my future. It was after midnight before I finally gave up, not having a plan, not one stinking plan.

  Alex was asleep on my sofa. He was wearing a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt. His right hand was over his head with the other one resting on his chest. Maddie slept like that. I stared at him sleeping peacefully wondering how he could be such an ass. It was a shame he had the personality that he did. Of course I was the only one that thought his personality lacked decency. He had everyone else eating out of the palm of his hand. He was so handsome. Oh my God, I groaned, causing him to stir. I quietly walked away. He was too ugly to be handsome.

  I walked in to Maddie’s room. She was also sleeping with one hand over her head and one on her chest. I kissed her sleeping lips and covered her up, not that she would be there much longer. She would be in my bed within the hour. Guaranteed.

  I woke to an empty bed. I should have known better than to drink beer with Maddie there. I never heard her climb in and out of bed. I wasn’t instantly panicked that she was cooking something, like I normally was. I knew her so called daddy was there. Jesus my head hurt again. I was never drinking again. That was it. I was done with that. Why the hell was I awake at eight in the morning anyway? I was supposed to be staying in bed hung over all day. Oh yeah, I had to pee. Stupid beer.

  I slipped on a pair of shorts and walked out, blinking my eyes to make sure, I was seeing what I was seeing. Both Alex and Maddie were asleep on my couch. I hated that son of a bitch, but I’d never seen anything so cute in all my life. They were freaking adorable. Maddie was asleep on his chest with her little arm flung across him. He had his hand on her butt, holding her close to him. She went to him. She didn’t come to me. I didn’t like it. It hurt my heart a little.

  I started coffee after relieving myself of the unwanted beer, waking Alex. He sat up moving Maddie over.

  “Morning,” he whispered.

  “Hey,” I casually said, not looking at him.

  He walked to the bathroom and didn’t come out. I knew what was taking so long when I heard the shower.

  Maddie sat up just as he shut it off. “I have a potty,” she said.

  Shit. Now what?

  “Can you hold it for five minutes?”

  “I have a potty. It gonna fall out.”

  “Come on.” I took her hand and tapped on the door.

  Alex opened it with shaving cream on his face and a towel wrapped around his waist.

  I felt the strangest urge to jump up and down, pee a rainbow, bark like a dog. Jesus God, he was yummy.

  “I have a pee,” Maddie explained, helping me out. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t move my eyes from his delectable body.

  “You going to help her or just lust after me?” Alex smirked.

  “In your dreams,” I counted, removing the pull up and tossing it in the trash.

  I walked out to get Maddie a pair of panties and when I returned she was standing butt naked on the sink, smeared in shaving cream.

  “Here, pick your foot up,” I said, trying to discreetly look at Alex through the mirror.

  “I shave too,” Maddie said, patting shaving cream on her cheeks and raising her foot as I pulled on a pair of panties for her. I wanted her to argue, just a bit, so that I didn’t have to move. I couldn’t help it. It was his fault. He was the one that kept me from leaving the night before. I wouldn’t have been so keen on looking at him had I gotten laid.

  “You got her,” I asked, turning away and then right back as I made it to the door. His ass really shouldn’t look like that.

  “Yes, we’ll be out as soon as we shave.”

  I left, closing the door and shaking my head, telling myself to get a grip. I could not lust after Alex Wesson.

  Alex left as soon as he was dressed, saying that he had work to do. He hugged Maddie and even told her that he loved her.

  “Daddy will see you in few days with a big truck, okay?”

  “And Maddie gonna sweep at you house?”

  “Yes, baby, you’re going to sleep in my house.”

  “And Mommy too?”

  “Yes, Mommy too. Daddy’s got to go. I’ll call you later,” he said, giving her one more kiss.

  “Did you want a kiss?” he teased.

  “You’re a smart man. I’m sure you can find the answer to that somewhere in that screwed up mind of yours.”

  He snickered and kissed Maddie on the cheek before leaving.

  Maddie and I spent some time at our little beach, rode her bike on the basketball court, ate supper in the dining room with my dad and Dana, and were home and bathed by seven o’clock.

  I walked out of the bathroom to Maddie talking on my phone. Now who did she call? The last time she had my phone she was talking to someone in Los Angeles, California.

  “Give me that,” I demanded.

  “Hello?” I said, to the laughing idiot. I could tell right away that it was Alex.

  “What are you laughing at?”

  “I know—” He couldn’t even spit it out, he was laughing so hard. He repeated himself several times unable to speak. I was getting mad. He seemed to have that effect on me.

  “WHAT ALEX?”

  “I know what you’re doing?” he laughed.

  “You know what I’m doing?” I asked, not having a clue what the hell he was talking about. I wasn’t doing anything.

  “Yes, Maddie just informed me that you were pooping.”

  “Oh my God, Madelyn Rae,” I yelled at my smiling daughter. “Here talk to her,” I demanded, handing her th
e phone, glad that he couldn’t see the crimson red that I was sure had just taken over my cheeks. I was mortified.

  Chapter 7

  I’m sure that was the longest week of my life. The anticipation was killing me. I just wanted to go and get it over with. I couldn’t stay focused on anything anyway. I was horrible at training the new girl that would take my place checking guests in and out. I couldn’t remember anything and I’d been doing that job since I was ten.

  Maddie spent a lot of time with my dad and Dana while I cried, packing up our things. I wasn’t packing everything. We’d be back. I would figure out a way. I didn’t even take all of my clothes. I wouldn’t need those either. I wasn’t allowed to work. What the hell did I need clothes for? I did take all of Maddie’s. There was no sense in leaving hers behind. She out grew them faster than I could buy them anyway.

  I let Maddie help pack two boxes of her favorite toys, of course all of them were her favorite.

  “Maddie you can’t take them all. You won’t have anything to play with when we come home.”

  “I can bring dem back. In dis box,” she assured me, picking up an empty box. I let her fill the box with toys that I would leave behind, unbeknownst to her. “Dat my daddy!” Maddie exclaimed, running to the new ring tone which I was sure I wasn’t going to be allowed to keep. I’m not even sure who sang the stupid song. The chorus said something like, ‘you were a waste, even when you were nothing but sperm, now you’re a waste on a pedestal thinking you’re firm.’

  I sat on Maddie’s bed, listening to her talk to her daddy with mostly uh-huh’s. “My daddy want a talk a you now,” Maddie said, handing me my phone.

  “What?” I answered.

  “Still being a bitch, eh?”

  “No Alex, I’m freaking ecstatic. I can’t wait to be whisked away to live with you. What do you want?”

  “I just wanted to let you know that the truck would be there around eight in the morning.”

  “I told you that I don’t need a truck. I’m not bringing that much; my truck will do fine.”

  “The truck will be there by eight. You are not parking that thing in my driveway. You and Maddie can ride home with me.”

  “I can’t wait.” Click.

  I’m sure I didn’t sleep at all. I was still staring at the ceiling, wide awake when Maddie crawled in bed with me at three in the morning. I was still awake well after that, thinking about my plan. The plan that I didn’t have. I needed one of those little tape recorder things. Maybe I could get him to say something that I could use against him. Maybe I could record him admitting to the rape and forcing me to live with him through extortion.

  I woke to the sound of beeping. What the hell was that? Oh, the truck. I looked to the empty side of my bed. Shit! Where was Maddie?

  I quickly pulled on shorts and ran out to the kitchen.

  “Madelyn Rae Bradshaw!” I yelled just as Mr. Dick Head himself opened my door. She was sitting on the floor with one hell of a mess.

  “I did cook,” she said, looking up with wide eyes.

  The sugar bowl sat beside her. She had at least two cups in the bowl with the little bit of Fruity Pebbles, and I have no idea what else was in there. I’m pretty sure one consisted of barbeque sauce.

  “Why do you do this?” I asked. “Why can’t you just wake me up?”

  “Me was hungry,” she implied like I was stupid.

  I looked to see the expression on Alex’s face, sure that it was going to be a smirk. Shit, it wasn’t. He was looking at my braless t-shirt.

  “Here,” I said, breaking him from his useless trance. He was never touching this chest. I lifted Maddie, letting sugar run down her body and handed her off to him. He held her out and carried her to the bathroom.

  My dad and Dana showed up as I swept the last little bit into the dustpan. I dumped the bowl of whatever the hell she was trying to create down the garbage disposal, grabbing the bouncy ball just in time.

  “Papaw,” Maddie screamed running to him with clean clothes and wet hair. What the hell? Her hair was washed and I hadn’t heard her scream that her eyes were burning at all. She didn’t whine about it at all. “I feed a fish, Papaw,” she said, holding his face in her hands.

  “Okay, we’ll go feed the fish in a minute.”

  I jumped in the shower next. This was it. All of my things were loaded and the truck was pulling out. Alex pulled me close to his side and kissed the side of my wet hair, putting on a show for my dad. I wanted to punch him.

  We ate breakfast with my dad and Dana in the dining room and said a quick goodbye, by Alex’s sweet as hell Lexus or something. I don’t know what it was, but it was sharp. I loved it. Of course I wouldn’t disclose my love affair with his car to him. I hated that car. My dad hugged Maddie and then me. He shook Alex’s hand, told him to take care of his girls, and got the hell out of there. I could tell he was pretty choked up. I hated Alex Wesson.

  We rode in silence for at least half an hour. Well, I was silent. He and Maddie were jabbering away. I stared out the window, not paying attention to the toddler conversation going on behind my seat.

  “Does your family still live in the house that Maddie was conceived in?” I asked, turning to him. I was nice about it. I put it as mildly as I could, only because I didn’t want to say rape where Maddie could hear.

  “No, they live in Lincoln too, about twenty minutes from our house.”

  “It’s not our house,” I assured him. My house was forty miles back.

  “It is our house, and you will meet my parents Sunday. We’re going there for dinner.”

  “Great, I can’t wait.” So this was my life. I just agreed and did everything that Alex Wesson told me that I was doing. “Do you have brothers or sisters?”

  “I have a sister, Regan. She can’t wait to meet you.”

  I couldn’t reply. I was sick. I didn’t want to meet Regan or Mr. and Mrs. Wesson. “What do they know about Maddie?” I asked curious.

  “Everything, they already met her when she stayed with me. They love her to death.”

  “You didn’t tell me that.”

  “You don’t really talk to me.”

  “That’s because…never mind. It doesn’t even matter,” I decided, turning my attention back to the wild flowers along the highway. I was tired of repeating myself. It didn’t matter that I was being forced to leave my home and live with him. He didn’t care what I thought about any of it.

  “You’re not even two hours from your family, Whitley. You can see your family.”

  Again, I didn’t reply with words, just the nasty glare that I was sure he had to be getting used to.

  I ran Maddie into the house and to the bathroom as soon as Alex unlocked the door. That was close; she barely made it. The truck had already been there and gone, leaving our things in the garage.

  “I thought you could take this room,” Alex said, opening the door to where Maddie slept the last time.

  “What about Maddie?”

  He walked around me and down the hall from my new room. “I had this room cleaned out. I think it was a library at one time, but I’m not really a reader. I thought the shelves would come in handy with all of her toys and books.”

  I walked into the most amazing room I’d ever seen in my life. I wanted that room. I liked to read. I could just fill it up with books and live there. I wouldn’t have to worry about seeing him. The shelves were a shiny black, from floor to ceiling. They tied in with a white marble floor with black and gray swirls,

  I was astounded.

  “I’m having that desk removed. I thought her bed could slide in its place. We’ll go pick out furniture for her tomorrow.”

  “It’s pretty far away from my room. I’m not sure I like her being all the way down here by herself.”

  “We’ll get some baby monitors so you can hear her.”

  “This floor is probably going to be cold this winter, don’t you think?”

  Alex smiled as Maddie ran around the room, slidin
g her socks and pretending to skate. “I have heated floors. She could sleep on this floor and stay warm.”

  “Heated floors? How does that work?” I was curious about that.

  “There are waterlines just below the floor. The furnace heats the water and it circulates through the lines.”

  I raised my eyebrows. Interesting.

  <><><>

  We fought about the five thousand dollar bedroom ensemble for Maddie. It was ludicrous. She didn’t need that. It was such a waste of money but Alex didn’t care. That was the one that she liked. We fought about the Lexus that I loved. No, that I hated. It was for me. I didn’t need a car like that. I was afraid of it. I couldn’t even imagine how much he spent on that. We fought about the credit card that had my name on it. I wasn’t using his money. I had money. Well, I had $649.00 left in my checking. How long would that last?

  I didn’t even get the house to myself. That was the only thing that I was looking forward to. Alex worked from his home office almost every day. He did leave a couple of times to go to his office and do whatever it was he did. I still didn’t know what Wesson Simulations was. I didn’t care enough to do any research to find out. He would work a couple hours, come out and play with Maddie, work for a little while, and then do the same thing.

  By Friday I was already going nuts. There was nothing to do in that amazingly huge house. I found a vacuum in a utility closet bigger than my kitchen back home. At least it was something to do.

  I turned looking toward the plug from the beautiful rug when it suddenly stopped.

  “What are you doing?” Alex asked, holding the plug in one hand and Maddie in his arm.

  “What does it look like I am doing?”

  “You don’t have to do that. The cleaning staff will be here in the morning.”

  “The cleaning staff?”

  “Yes, I have three girls come in and clean from top to bottom every Saturday. I thought we would spend the day at the zoo.”

  “Alex, what the hell do you expect me to do around here? I am going crazy. I can’t just sit around here every day. I’ve been working since I was old enough to walk. I’m not handling this well.”