Dream Come True

by Gina Calanni

  The host hands each of us a menu and I settle into my seat. I want to sit here and enjoy this fancy restaurant with – no doubt – fancy food. But I can’t. I can’t just sit here and pretend that I don’t know about Brandon paying for my Eagle Online debt. I can’t. I have to say something. I place my menu down. I’ve got to do it. We need to discuss this before we have a nice dinner. Being fake just isn’t me.

  “Brandon, I… we need to talk.”

  Brandon places his menu down on the table and inspects my face. He doesn’t say anything. It’s like he wants me to speak first. I was hoping he might just fess up to paying and then I could tell him I wasn’t okay with it and we could figure out a way for him to get his money back and move on from this. But he isn’t speaking. He is without words, just watching me. Waiting.

  I swallow. “I really appreciate what you did. I think it’s really sweet. I do. And I’m not trying to insult your good intentions. But…” I roll my lips. “I can’t accept it.” I let out a deep breath. Whoosh, that was harder than I thought.

  Brandon has a big question mark hovering above his head. “What are you talking about, Sahara?”

  I blink several times, trying to get the question mark out of my mind and settle this matter.

  “My Eagle Online account… I can’t have you paying that.” I let out a deep breath. “I know I made a mistake, but it’s my mistake and I have to fix it on my own.”

  “I still don’t understand what you’re saying.” Brandon raises an eyebrow at me.

  “My Eagle Online student loan debt is paid and I’m saying that, though I think it’s really sweet, I can’t have you paying it. I need to take care of that myself.”

  Brandon runs his fingers through his hair. “Okay, let me get this straight. You had a student loan balance and now you don’t? And you think I paid it for you?”

  My eyes bulge out of my head. “Yes, and I need you to get your money back. I’ll figure out how to pay it on my own.”

  Brandon laughs. “Sahara, I didn’t pay your debt.”

  I press my lips together. “Come on, please don’t do this, it’s embarrassing enough as it is.”

  He reaches forward and grabs my hands. “If you needed my help, I would help you, Sahara, but I promise you I did not pay your loans.” He kisses my hands.

  “So you’re saying you didn’t pay my debt?”

  “That’s what I’m saying.” He squeezes my fingers.

  I slump my shoulders and retract my body. “Okay, fine. If you didn’t do it, then who did?’ I shake my hair over my shoulder.

  “I don’t know. Maybe your mama?”

  I laugh. “That would be the day. One, my mama doesn’t have that kind of money, and two, if she did there is no way she would fork it over to help me.”

  My laughter disappears as I realize how sad that is. But it’s the truth. My insides burn. I wish it weren’t true. I wish things were different but somehow my mama has always seen me as a burden. I know this, not just from how she acts; she’s actually told me this to my face. I was twelve years old, wanting to go on a school trip, and she said she didn’t have the money and even if she did it wouldn’t go to me and some school trip… then she followed it up with “having you has been my biggest burden in life.” I swallow hard and glance at the white tablecloth. I want to pull it over my head and cry. But I won’t do that. Not in front of Brandon or these other fancy folks. I’ll wait till I get home and cry in my bed… but quietly, just like I’ve been taught. Don’t make a sound Sahara… it’s your bedtime. Cry quietly. Yes, Mama.

  Chapter Twenty

  My clothes are spread out all over the room. Brandon and I were not exactly careful as we undressed. More like wild animals. I hope my one and only fancy dress did not suffer from our carelessness. I find my panties on the back of his chair and rush to put them on. My bra is hanging from the edge of the bed.

  “Hey, what are you doing?” Brandon runs his eyes over my half-undressed body.

  “Getting dressed.” I attach my bra.

  “Why? Come back to bed.” He reaches for me and pulls me into the sheets with him. His musky cologne is wavering against my nose and I’m falling back into the moment of being wrapped up in him and his love. Our lips meet and we kiss as if we are kicking the power on again and it’s intense and full of sorts of specialness. His mouth is warm as he makes his way to my neck and down my chest. He fiddles with the back of my bra.

  “I can’t Brandon, I have to get home.” I sit up.

  “Stay the night with me. I want to wake up to your pretty face.” He cups my chin and kisses me again.

  I pull back and smile. “I want to, but I don’t think Ms. Myra would approve.”

  “What does that matter? You’re an adult paying rent; she’s not your mama.”

  “I know but I don’t feel right about not coming home, without her having any idea about that. I think she might worry.” I get out of the bed and put my dress over my head.

  Brandon growls. “That dress makes me want to take it off of you all over again.”

  I laugh. “Brandon, I have to go; it’s almost midnight.”

  “Fine, Cinderella, but I need you to have whatever talk you need to have with Ms. Myra so that the next time I bring you here, you stay the night.” He hops out of bed and finds his pants. His body is covered with unending muscles and I have to cut my eyes away so I don’t waver back to his bed either. I’ve got to do what’s right and be respectful of Ms. Myra. I will have a talk with her, but not tonight.

  Brandon leads me out of his bedroom and down the hallway. He lives in the guest house on his daddy’s land. It’s about an acre away from the main house. Which gives him the privacy he wants, but he said he is considering getting his own land. I still don’t understand how someone with all of this would want to be with someone like me.

  He locks the door and we stroll to the truck hand in hand. Brandon stops at the passenger door and lifts up my chin.

  “How did I get to be so lucky? With a goldilocks like you?” He leans down and kisses me so softly that I close my eyes and think I’m dreaming. His lips pull back and I’m brought back to the present and hop into the seat. The ride back to Ms. Myra’s house is quiet. The good kind of quiet. The kind you have with someone where you’re comfortable just sitting with them and not saying a word.

  Brandon walks me up to the front door and I see the house is completely dark. Which is odd since I left in the daylight, and I would have thought Ms. Myra would have left the porch light on at the very least. I hope she isn’t mad. I don’t think she will be. But what if I’m wrong?

  “It’s so dark.” I fumble in my purse for my keys and Brandon flashes his phone over the opening, providing me with the light I need to find them. “Thank you.”

  “Anything for my goldilocks.” Brandon kisses my neck. Little sparks float down my arms. I find my key and stick it in the hole.

  “Thanks for dinner; it was really good.” I step on my tiptoes to kiss him and he opens the door.

  “I’m not going to let you walk into a dark house alone.” Brandon finds the light switch on the wall and I gasp.

  Ms. Myra is lying on the floor. Her mouth is open and she looks like she must have fainted or something. I rush to her and kneel down by her body. I grab her hand and squeeze it.

  “Ms. Myra? Are you all right?”

  Brandon kneels next to me and pulls out his phone and begins speaking “Yes, we need an ambulance to Five One Two Maple Street. We just got home to find Ms. Myra unconscious on the floor. No, we don’t know if she has suffered a concussion. Thank you.”

  Ms. Myra’s wrist is so cold but I feel like there is a pulse. I’m not a doctor but I did get Red Cross certified to babysit. My heart is racing in my chest like it’s going to jump out.

  “I think she’s breathing. Can you check?” I glance up at Brandon.

  “Yes, she is. Her chest is moving up and down.” Brandon points to what I should have noticed on my own. I’m such a fo
ol. I should have been here. My insides are caving in.

  “I should’ve been here.” A tear falls from my eye.

  “Sahara, you can’t be here every minute. You have a life, she knows that.” Brandon kneels down next to me and combs my hair with his fingers. “This could have happened while you were at work, or at any time.”

  “But I knew she wasn’t doing good today. When I knocked on her bedroom door earlier, I should have made sure she was all right. And I didn’t.” I shake my head and tears fall from my eyes.

  Brandon pulls me in close to him. “You didn’t know. It’s okay, the ambulance is on the way.” His arms are wrapped around me and it’s like I’m in a special place being sheltered from all the hurt of the world. I don’t want Ms. Myra to be ill. I don’t. But I can’t help but think this is the case and it’s too late.

  The knock on the door breaks away the silence and I hop up to answer it. The paramedics come rushing through with their roll-away bed and begin checking Ms. Myra’s vitals. She still hasn’t spoken or opened her eyes. They lift her onto the bed and rush her out almost without speaking to us. Brandon does most of the talking and then leads me back out to his truck so we can follow behind the ambulance to the hospital. The sound of the siren goes off and the lights flash from white to blue and I can’t help but think living with Ms. Myra for a long period was too good to be true.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  We’ve been sitting in the bright fluorescent emergency waiting room for several hours. I glance up at Brandon; his eyes are on me. I’m cold and tired.

  “You should go home and rest.” I brush my hand against his.

  “I’m not leaving you, Sahara.” He squeezes my hand. “There is bound to be an update soon. Let me go and check.” He stands up and makes his way to the receptionist. The lady shakes her head at him and then glances back to me. He stalks back over and sits down.

  “She says she can’t give any updates to non-family members.” He squeezes my hand.

  My shoulders slump and I realize I don’t even know who Ms. Myra’s family is or her next of kin. What if she… I can’t even think it but what if I needed to contact someone? I wouldn’t even know who to call.

  And then a flash of light crosses my brain and I’m not sure if it’s because it’s so late or rather so early. Maybe I’m delirious but I realize that I should and could call my mama. She would know who to call. She said Ms. Myra was an old family friend. She must know who I can call. I reach through my purse and find my phone. It’s just after six in the morning. My mama is most likely not about to be up but this is an emergency; after all, I am in the emergency room.

  “Hello, Sahara, are you in trouble?” My mama’s voice sounds concerned. Given it is six in the morning and I’ve never called her this early before I wonder what thoughts are rushing though her mind.

  “No, ma’am, but Ms. Myra is. I found her laying down on the floor and we’re in the emergency room right now. They won’t let me find out her condition because I’m not family. Who can I call for her?”

  My mama sighs. “Oh, blessed, damn hospitals, always causing problems.”

  “Mama?”

  She sighs again. I pull the phone away from my ear for a second until she finishes her deep exhale.

  “Sahara, she wouldn’t want it to be this way.” My mama tsks.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, Sahara, Ms. Myra is not a Ms. to you. She’s your aunt.”

  “What? My aunt? You never told me you had any sisters.”

  “I don’t. She’s not my sister. She’s your daddy’s sister.”

  My eyes bulge out. I can’t believe all this time I’ve been living with my daddy’s sister. The man who left me on my tenth birthday. All this time and she never said anything. Not one little clue. Nothing. My heart is squeezing tight; pain from all those years is brought back and tears start streaming down my face.

  “Sahara, she didn’t mean you no harm. She wanted to help.”

  I nod but no words come out. I feel betrayed. We had a relationship that we were building and I liked her. I still do, but now what?

  “Listen, I contacted her when you got the job offer for Blue Ribbon to see if she would let you stay with her and she was really excited to help. But made me promise not to tell you who she was.”

  “But why?”

  “Because, Sahara, she’s embarrassed she never knew you and she is embarrassed to be associated with your daddy. She wanted to do what was right years ago but I told her to stay away, that we didn’t need any more hurt from their family.”

  I swallow. “I’ve got to go, Mama.”

  “All right, but mind your manners and remember how much you cared for her; those feelings don’t change just because you no longer call her Ms.”

  “Yes, Mama.”

  I end the call and eye Brandon; he wraps me in his arms. The warmth from his body soothes my cold, shattered heart. I want to rush up and tell the hospital staff that it’s my aunt in there but I’m afraid and hurt. What if she doesn’t want me to know? What if I tell her I know and it just makes her condition worse?

  Brandon rubs the back of my head with soft, gentle strokes and I find myself drifting off to sleep. I shake my head. I can’t miss out on the opportunity of talking to her. Since they wouldn’t give us any updates as non-family members, I have no idea what her status is.

  I peer up at Brandon and sit up straight. “My mama said that Ms. Myra is actually my aunt; she’s my daddy’s sister.” I swallow. Saying anything about my daddy always chills my bones. All those years of hoping he might return, only to have another birthday pass with no sign of him.

  “Well, then you can find out what her status is.” Brandon pulls me up to a standing position.

  “I’m worried.” I stare into his eyes. There is something in those dreamy blues that makes me think I can do things I previously wouldn’t have thought I’d be able to accomplish. He rubs my shoulders. “I know. But you should go now while you might still have a chance to talk with her.”

  “Okay.” He hugs me once more as if he is passing over some of his strength to me and I make my way up to the front desk.

  “Excuse me, can I check on Ms. Myra’s status?” I eye the front-desk clerk.

  “I’m sorry, family only.” She glances back at her computer.

  I clear my throat. “Yes, I just found out from my mama that Ms. Myra is actually my aunt, from my daddy’s side.”

  “All right, does she know that?” She raises an eyebrow at me like maybe I’m making this up.

  “Yes, ma’am.” I nod.

  “One second.” She holds up her pointer finger and picks up her phone. I can hardly hear any of the muffled message she is relaying to the person on the other line.

  A woman in a nurse’s outfit pushes through the double doors and waves at me. “Sahara?”

  “Yes, ma’am.” I nod and peer over my shoulder at Brandon. He nods back at me and I follow the nurse through the corridor and down several hallways. She pulls back a curtain and Ms. Myra – my aunt – is lying peacefully.

  My chest tightens as I tiptoe to the side of the bed. “Ms. Myra?”

  Her body stirs and she opens her eyes. “Sahara, what are you doing here?”

  “I, Brandon and I, we followed the ambulance here. I’m sorry you were all alone for… I don’t know how long.” Tears stream down my face.

  “Ssh, hush now, Sahara. That wasn’t any of your concern. I just got a little dizzy and decided to take a nap on the floor.” She laughs. “When you get old you do that kind of thing.”

  I roll my lips. “Ms.… actually, I talked to my mama. I needed to know who I could call to let them know you were in here and well… I know.” I can hardly breathe but I’m not going to act weak when she is the one lying in the hospital bed. I step closer to her.

  “You do? Are you mad?” She pats the bed for me to sit. “It’s okay if you are. I wouldn’t blame you.”

  I shrug my shoulders and slu
mp down onto the bed. “I don’t know. I’m not mad. I just wish I would have known sooner. It would have been such a nice thing to know you and I are family.”

  Aunt Myra takes a turn tearing up. “Oh, Sahara, I’m so sorry, sweetie. I tried to a while back, but your mama was too hurt because of my deadbeat brother.” She shakes her head. “I should’ve tried again. I wanted to be a part of your life. I did.”

  I nod. “I believe you. You’ve been kinder and more caring than anybody except my mama – after all, she did raise me.” I blink back tears.

  “Look at us here. We’re going to flood this room. Hand me a tissue, please.”

  I walk over to the wall and bring the box back with me and set it on her table. I take out a tissue for myself.

  “Will you be honest with me?” I stare down at her.

  She nods.

  “I want to know how bad is it.” I swallow.

  She takes in a deep breath and glances at the wall and then back to me. “It’s bad.”

  “Is it cancer?”

  “Yes, but let’s not talk about it.” She dabs at her eyes. “I don’t want my last hours or days spent thinking one second longer on that dreadful disease.”

  “Oh no, Aunt Myra, is it really days? Please say that’s not true.” My chest hurts so bad.

  “I’m afraid so. I finished my last rounds of chemo before you arrived. It didn’t work and I’m not wanting to be a guinea pig in my last days. I’d rather just live, or try and live.” She wipes her eyes. “Even if that means taking a nap on the living room floor.” She lets out a laugh.

  I join her even though I don’t want to laugh in this moment.

  “Are you going to be able to leave the hospital?” I reach for her hand.

  “Oh Lord, yes. I’m not spending my last moments between these dreary walls. No way.” She waves her hands. They are dreary, beige and depressing and I want to fade into them. This moment can’t be happening. I don’t want her to go. To leave me. I’ve got to buck up and be here for her now.