Faking Reality

by Zaria Garrison

  Jimmy nodded. “Okay, I’ll talk to Brandon about it.”

  Two days later, Brandon reiterated his answer. “No, I don’t want to be a part of this show,” he said emphatically. “I want to move on, and I want to forget it. Can’t I just do that in peace?”

  Zack Morton sat at his office desk looking over at him. Their meeting had only begun a few minutes earlier, and Brandon had already said no to the show five times. He’d also said no to Jimmy and Yolanda Snow, as well as Danita, when they had asked. Zack was their last hope of getting a yes out of him. “I understand that you want to move on, but as a minister, you know that part of the grief process is channeling your grief into something positive.”

  “I’ll be honest with you, Zack. In the past when I’ve sat in my office and counseled people who were grieving, I’ve said the same thing. Now that I’m on the other side of the desk, I realize just how ineffective this is.”

  “Okay, since you’re being honest, tell me the real reason that you don’t want to do this show. I know that you loved Tia, so why are you so against honoring her?”

  Brandon shifted his weight in his chair and continued brooding. “You wouldn’t understand. Yes, I loved Tia, but Tia didn’t love me.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “The sad thing is that I’ve always known how she felt, but I wouldn’t accept it. I just kept praying to God that one day she’d stop faking that she loved me and actually start loving me for real. It never happened. Right up until the day she died, she was playing me for a fool,” he said. He tried to fight it, but tears began rolling down his cheeks.

  Zack reached across his desk and quietly handed Brandon a tissue. Patiently, he waited as Brandon dabbed at his tears and blew his nose before speaking again. “I didn’t know Tia that well, but I do believe that she loved you.”

  “If she loved me, then why did she play such a cruel joke on me? She knew how much I wanted to be a father. Pretending to be pregnant like that has to be the vilest, cruelest thing she could think of. If she loved me, she would have been honest with me.”

  “Look at me, Brandon. Look into my eyes.”

  Brandon glanced at Zack, then turned his eyes back to his lap. “My dad used to ask me to look into his eyes when he wanted to emphasize a point. I’m not a teenager, so you don’t have to do that.”

  “No, that’s not what I mean. I want you to look at the difference in my eyes, and in my hair.”

  “I know they are brown now instead of blue. And I can see your roots growing into your hair. What does how you look have to do with me?”

  “I was dishonest with my wife for my entire marriage. I set out to make her and everyone else believe that I was something that I was not. I know I was wrong, but I swear to you, it had nothing to do with how much I loved her.”

  “So tell me why you did it? I was raised to tell the truth. My parents never tolerated me or my siblings telling even a small lie. So you’ll have to excuse me if I don’t understand the logic behind lying to someone that you love.”

  “There is no logic behind it. I can’t speak for Tia, but for me, I did what I did in order to please the people who claimed to love me. My stepparents wanted a white son, so I gave them a white son. Even though he wasn’t real, I justified my actions by telling myself that it was what they wanted.”

  “No offense, but that’s pretty lame. I suppose you are trying to say that Tia lied to me and wore padding because I wanted a baby so much.”

  “Like I said, I can’t speak for Tia. But don’t you think that your desire to be a father might have affected her actions just a smidgen? I know you’ve taught Sunday School. One of the first lessons we teach is that once you tell a lie, you have to keep telling more lies in order to cover for the first one until you have a huge ball of incomprehensible lies. I know from experience that you don’t want to keep doing it, but you also have no idea how to stop it.”

  “I wanted to be a father because I love kids and I believe in family. That does not justify what she did.”

  “It doesn’t. I totally agree. I’m not trying to justify it at all. I’m just trying to help you understand it, so that you can deal with it.” Zack paused and picked up his Bible. He turned to Ephesians 4:32. “I know that I shouldn’t have to read this to you, but I feel that you need to hear it.

  And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

  Zack closed his Bible and looked over at Brandon. “I’m sorry for what I did, and I’m thankful to God that my wife has forgiven me. You’ve got to forgive Tia. You said that you want to move on. The first step to that is forgiving your wife for what she’s done.”

  Brandon covered his face with his hands as he broke down and cried. “I loved her so much, and now she’s gone. Being mad at her keeps me from missing her,” he sobbed.

  Zack stood up from his desk and walked over to Brandon. He knelt on the floor beside him and lay his hand on his arms, and he began to pray. He allowed Brandon to continue sobbing as he petitioned God on his behalf. When he was done, he returned to his seat and quietly waited for Brandon to pull himself together.

  “I’ll do the show,” Brandon said. He blew his nose.

  “Are you sure? I know that’s initially why I asked you to come here, but the last thing I want to do is put more pressure on you. I’m your friend first. Don’t worry about the rest of the cast, I’ll handle them.”

  “No, I’m sure. I want to honor my wife, and I know that the viewers of the show want to honor her as well. I’ve received a ton of cards and letters from people since this happened. They all loved Tia.”

  “Um, you announced on the show that she was pregnant. How do you want to handle that with the tribute show?”

  “It’s not a problem. The police have told me to keep it under wraps because the fewer people who know, the better. I’ve only shared it with the cast and, of course, my family. We are all positive of Julian’s guilt, but they think we need to keep a lid on the details of the crime, just in case. Anyone with too much information could be a suspect.”

  “I thought Julian was the only suspect.”

  “He is, but they think he may have had some help.”

  Zack nodded. “I’ll call Anderson and the others and let them know we have a green light on the show.”

  Chapter Twenty-six

  Brandon sat in his living room staring at the lights that were twinkling on his Christmas tree. It had only been up a week, but according to his family’s tradition, he planned to take it down the next morning. His mother would have a fit if he allowed a Christmas tree to be up in his house when the New Year rolled in.

  His traditional celebrations would continue into the New Year, and he’d invited Zack and Charlene, along with their family, to have New Year’s Day dinner with him. His housekeeper was planning to cook a traditional dinner that included black-eyed peas, collard greens, and corn bread. They laughed at him when he told them that Zack would have to walk into the house first, but according to Brandon’s mom and her down-home superstitions, it was bad luck to have a woman enter your house first in the New Year. He’d also invited Danita, but she and her girls were spending the holidays at a cottage she’d rented on Martha’s Vineyard. Jimmy and Yolanda Snow had also declined his invitation because they’d accepted an invitation to dine with the parents of JJ’s girlfriend, Teresa.

  Celebrating the holidays without Tia had been extremely difficult for Brandon, but his family and friends had helped make it memorable and special for him. The Revelations Christmas Special aired a week before Christmas. Anderson had arranged for the cast to meet at a rented mansion, where they gave the illusion of enjoying a holiday dinner together. The set was decorated with garland, red bows, and a huge Christmas tree surrounded by gifts. Danita’s girls, along with Charlene and Zack’s children, opened gifts provided by the show. During the interview segments, they each spoke from their heart about Tia. Brandon was humbled by
the fact that several of the memories shared were things that he did not know had transpired. He knew that his wife had her faults, and he was pleased to hear so many wonderful things about her.

  At the end of the show, Yolanda Snow did a brief public service announcement regarding the dangers of not reporting an abusive partner or stalker. She was joined by Brandon as he announced that the four churches featured on Revelations would be joining together to form a program for battered women. Its purpose would begin with counseling and eventually lead to a shelter for those needing a way out. The police also added in a Crime Stoppers number for viewers to call if anyone had any information on Julian’s whereabouts.

  Brandon spent Christmas with his family in his hometown of Tulsa, Oklahoma. He arrived on Christmas Eve, and his mother and sisters were busy in the kitchen preparing cakes, pies, ham, turkey, and a myriad of delicious foods for Christmas dinner. Later, he and his brothers were up until five A.M. assembling bicycles and dollhouses for all of the kids. Seeing the looks on their faces filled him with joy and sadness. While watching them, he prayed that one day God would bless him with a family as big and loving as the one his parents had.

  The day after Christmas, he returned home in order to spend the rest of the holidays with friends in Atlanta. Brandon turned off the tree lights and went upstairs to his bedroom. After saying his nightly prayers, he climbed into bed and dozed off almost as soon as his head hit the pillow. In the wee hours of the morning, his phone rang, waking him up. “Hello,” he mumbled.

  “Brandon, this is Quincy. If you want to see the birth of your son, you need to meet me at Piedmont Hospital right now.”

  Brandon, still groggy and half-asleep, replied, “Quincy, what are you talking about?”

  “I will explain everything when you get here, but you have to hurry or you’re gonna miss it.”

  “I’m going to miss what? You’re not making any sense.”

  “Ugh! Listen to me. I know that you know that Tia wasn’t really pregnant when she died. But she did plan on giving you the son you wanted. We hired a surrogate, and she’s gone into labor early. Just get down here!”

  Still feeling confused and numb with this information, Brandon stumbled out of bed and got dressed while trying to make sense of what he’d just been told. The last time he’d seen Quincy was the day that he found out Tia was dead. Since they were best friends, he decided that it would be easier if he went to Quincy’s shop and told him the news in person. As soon as Brandon walked into The Periwinkle Palace that day, Quincy began crying and flailing his arms wildly. “Oh my God, what happened? You’ve never been here before, so I know something bad must have happened to my girlfriend,” he cried.

  Brandon tried his best to calm him down and get him into the back room so that they could speak privately, but it was no use. While several confused customers looked on, Brandon broke the devastating news to him, and then spent the next half hour trying to calm him down as Quincy ran, cried, ranted, and screamed, totally hysterical. Since he was unable to calm him down, Brandon had no other choice but to lock up the store and drive Quincy home to his partner, Nicky.

  A few days later, Quincy called and told Brandon that he would not be attending Tia’s funeral. Instead, he asked if he could just stop by the mortuary and spend some time alone with her. Brandon had agreed and had not spoken to Quincy again.

  When he arrived at the hospital, Quincy was waiting to escort him up to labor and delivery. “I’m so glad that you’re here. I just spoke to her doctor, and it’s going to be awhile, but she’s definitely going to deliver.” He grabbed Brandon’s arm. “Let’s go.”

  “No. You need to explain everything to me first,” Brandon said, pulling his arm away. “Who’s going to deliver, and what is this all about?”

  Quincy motioned for him to follow him into the waiting room where they both sat down. “I may as well start at the beginning. Tia wanted to give you a child, but the truth is, she couldn’t get pregnant.”

  “We could have kept trying. She didn’t have to resort to tricks.”

  “No, you don’t understand. Tia had her tubes tied before she met you. You could have tried forever, but she never would have gotten pregnant.”

  “That’s impossible. She was pregnant two years ago, but she miscarried.”

  Quincy shook his head. “No, she wasn’t. She just pretended to be because you wanted it so much. Then she faked the miscarriage and hoped that would stop you from wanting to try again for a while.”

  “Just when I’d found peace and had begun to forgive her, I found out she’s been lying to me for years.” Brandon sighed. “So, are you telling me that she never wanted kids with me? It was all a game?”

  “No, she wanted to give you a baby, she just couldn’t. So she came to me for help.”

  “No offense, but why you? I know you were best friends, but you don’t seem to be the best option for this kind of problem.”

  “I’m not a biological woman, but I know what it’s like to want to give your man a child and not be able to.”

  Brandon suddenly regretted his choice of words. Spiritually, he believed that Quincy’s lifestyle was wrong, but he also felt that it wasn’t his place to judge him. In all the years that he’d known him as Tia’s best friend, he’d tried to understand him, rather than condemn him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude. So Tia came to you, and then what happened?”

  “I’ve had friends who used surrogates to build their families, and Tia knew this. So we decided to find one to carry the baby for her. That’s who is upstairs about to deliver. She knows that Tia is dead, and she still wants to give you the baby.”

  “Why didn’t Tia just tell me the truth? We could have hired the surrogate together, then at least the baby would really be ours. I mean, we talked about it, and I even made a few deposits at the sperm bank, just in case.”

  “Because she’d been lying to you for so long she was afraid of how you’d react to the truth. So she came up with this plan. The baby isn’t really Tia’s, but it’s really yours.”

  Brandon’s eyebrows crinkled with confusion. “I don’t understand what you mean.”

  “Tia told me that your family has very strong genes and that you’d be suspicious of a child that did not look like you. So the woman upstairs was impregnated with your sperm that you donated for you and Tia to use later on, in case you had conception problems. She’s giving birth to your son.”

  Unable to contain his excitement a moment longer, Brandon demanded that Quincy immediately take him to labor and delivery to meet the surrogate. Still feeling slightly confused, Brandon stood in the doorway and just stared at the surrogate woman for several moments before finally entering the room.

  “This is Myrna,” Quincy said, finally breaking the awkward silence that stood between them.

  Myrna winced in pain before weakly smiling at them both.

  Brandon continued to stare at the beautiful black woman lying in the bed. Her hair was dark brown and curly surrounding her light brown face. Brandon thought she looked a lot like his favorite singer, Jennifer Hudson. He slowly approached the bed like a nervous teenager on his first date. “I’m Brandon Kitts,” he said politely. He extended his hand to her.

  “Hi, Brandon,” she said. “This is weird. We’ve just met, and now we’re having a baby together.”

  The three of them laughed.

  “Tia gave me the check to pay Myrna a few weeks before she . . . well . . . anyway, we both felt that it was only right that you be here. Your son is going to be born real soon,” Quincy said.

  A few hours later, Brandon held Myrna’s hand as she gave birth to Brandon Tianté Kitts. Being seven weeks early, he was tiny and frail, but the doctor declared that he was healthy. Brandon cut the umbilical cord with trembling hands and fidgeted impatiently while the nurses cleaned and checked the baby. Just when Brandon thought he’d burst with anticipation, they finally laid the infant into his waiting arms. For weeks, he’d fought back tears of grief,
but as he stared in his son’s tiny face, he allowed the tears to flow freely. His heart swelled with so much pride, joy, and unconditional love that Brandon was sure he’d burst. “Hello, son,” he said as he grinned from ear to ear.

  Epilogue

  One Year Later

  Zack Morton trotted up his basement steps and closed the door before entering his kitchen. Charlene stood at the stove scrambling eggs, while Martin and Luther sat waiting at the table. Coretta swung her pudgy legs back and forth as she sat comfortably in her high chair.

  “Daddy, what time does the party start?” Luther asked.

  “Not until later this afternoon. After breakfast, we’re going to go shopping and pick out a present for him.”

  “Cool. I say we get him a super soaker water gun,” Martin said.

  “He’s only a year old, he can’t play with a super soaker water gun. Maybe we can get him an educational toy,” Charlene suggested as she placed eggs on everyone’s plate.

  “Mom, don’t do that to him. He’s too little to be educated. How about a toy drum? He loves to pound on things,” Luther suggested.

  “I think that’s a great idea,” Zack agreed. He dug into his eggs and smiled at his family. The past year had been one of their most difficult, but he was thankful that they’d come out of it feeling closer than ever to each other.

  The previous Christmas he received a beautiful card decorated with palm trees from Mabel Joe Stevens that read:

  Greetings from Hawaii

  Dear Zack,

  I have to thank you so much for giving me the money to keep your secret. As you always said, God does everything for a reason. I took the money and immediately flew to Hawaii to see my grandchildren. As it turns out, my daughter-in-law was sick, and she really needed my help, so I decided to stay. I have never been happier. This island is like paradise. Thank you so much for my blessing.

  Love,

  Mabel Joe Stevens