So Irresistible

by Lisa Plumley

  “Definitely in spite of myself. It’s all an accident.”

  “—but you are. All the better parts of you are trying to get out. If you’d just quit stomping them down so hard—”

  Inexpressibly moved by Gabby’s defense of him, Shane swallowed past a lump in his throat. His eyes kind of burned, too. Maybe he was allergic to those majestic American elm trees.

  “—maybe you would feel better about things.” Gabby kept her beautiful gaze focused on him, generous and certain. “Maybe you would feel better about me. About being with me.”

  Argh. That was all he wanted. All he couldn’t have.

  Hoping to achieve some necessary misdirection, Shane nodded at Gabby’s bike. It leaned against the granite base of the ten-foot-tall bronze statue of Abraham Lincoln that was a feature of the south park blocks. Even now, Honest Abe stared somberly down at them, seeming to either eavesdrop, judge, or approve.

  Given the ambiguousness of his sculpted expression, Shane couldn’t be sure. But Shane had to make a stand anyway.

  Otherwise, he’d weaken for sure.

  Preparing to resist Gabby, he cleared his throat. “I don’t think that’s an appropriate parking space for your bike.”

  There. That would send her away. She was obsessed with rules and determined to do the right thing. Now she’d leave.

  Instead, Gabby smiled. “I don’t think I care.”

  Uh-oh. “I, uh, have some things to do.” Vaguely, Shane gestured toward his car. “I was headed to the airport. I need to settle something with my friend Casey Jackson. I did something to him a long time ago, when we were just teenagers, and—”

  “Later. If it was that long ago, it can wait a little while longer, right?” Seeming suddenly nervous but endearingly persistent, Gabby stepped closer. Now they were both encompassed by Abe’s cryptic, all-seeing gaze. “Whatever you have to do, it can wait.”

  “I have to turn over a new leaf,” Shane blurted. “The food donation was a good start, but there’s so much more to do.”

  With surprising perceptiveness, Gabby angled her head at him. “I get it. You don’t feel ready for this. With us.”

  Mutely, Shane shook his head. “I will be,” he swore. “I thought I already was,” he admitted. “But this morning, with the walk-in and Frosty …” Another flash of that big man aiming his gun in Gabby’s direction chilled him. If he hadn’t moved quickly enough, they wouldn’t be having this conversation. Shane would have committed his most colossal screwup of all time. “I could have lost you. We could have lost each other.”

  “So it’s better that we go our separate ways?”

  He couldn’t help grinning. “You make it sound so crazy.”

  “Because it is crazy!” Gabby cried, laughing. She shook her head. “Don’t you think I was scared, too? I was! But just because we might lose each other doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try.”

  Shane couldn’t respond to that. He was too stuck. Too confused. Too caught up in knowing he had to make things more definite. More manageable. More predictable and controllable.

  Giving him a canny look, Gabby put her hands on her hips. “I understand. You’re trying to ‘fix’ this. You’re trying to make sure you can’t lose before you go for it with me.”

  This time, it was Shane’s turn to laugh. “Believe me, I’m not.” He shook his head. “I wouldn’t do that to you.”

  “But that’s what your ‘fixing’ is all about,” Gabby persisted. “You’ve had an uncertain life. As a kid, you couldn’t know what would happen to you next. You couldn’t change it. You couldn’t escape it, either. But now, as an adult, you can affect things. You can control the outcomes. You can set up things so that you win every time. That’s why you kept on fixing.”

  Shane scoffed. “Nice try, Freud. But I didn’t win this time.” Pointedly, he nodded at her. “Otherwise, we’d be someplace else right now, having a different conversation.”

  “We’d be getting naked and getting it on, and you know it.” Gabby’s eyes sparkled with certainty—and interest. She glanced up at Honest Abe. “Sorry, Mr. President, but it’s the truth.”

  Shane laughed again. “He looks so … judgmental, doesn’t he?”

  Musingly, Gabby glanced up again. “He looks patient. Like me.” She swerved her gaze to Shane. “I’m willing to wait for you to do whatever you have to do to feel ready. But I have to say, I think we should go for it. No rules. No certainty. Just love.”

  Shane had the distinct sensation that his heart stopped.

  After a little more drizzle rained down on him, his heart kicked back into action again. Standing there in the soggy south park blocks, with Gabby and Honest Abe and all the friendly Portlanders nearby, Shane found he just couldn’t do it anymore. He couldn’t deny himself. He was only one man with a laughably meager store of honor and self-sacrifice.

  He wanted Gabby. He needed her.

  “Love?” he asked. Embarrassingly, his voice broke.

  Gabby took his hand. “Yes, you lunkhead. Love.”

  “Because you haven’t said it for a while—”

  “You’ve been keeping my mouth busy with other things.” Audaciously, Gabby winked at him. “And I’m not really the type to make flowery, over-the-top declarations.”

  “Me neither,” Shane assured her, trying to look tough.

  Evidently, he failed completely. Because Gabby grinned.

  “I love you, Shane,” she told him. “I love you like anchovies on pizza and customers filling all my tables. I love your smile and your sexiness and your way of making me laugh—”

  “You’re a very easy touch when it comes to jokes.”

  “—and I love your generosity and your stubbornness—”

  “I can’t believe you weren’t too stubborn to say that.”

  “—and I’m so glad I found you at the brewpub that night,” Gabby went on determinedly, “because you are the only person who could have made me see what I was missing—what I was costing myself by working too hard and getting stressed out—”

  “I know an excellent stress-relieving maneuver.”

  “—and without you questioning me every step of the way, I would never have discovered what matters to me and what doesn’t. Because the truth is, I kind of intimidate some people—”

  “They don’t know what they’re missing.”

  “—and that gets lonely sometimes, but you got through to the real me, and you genuinely respected and liked me—”

  At that, Shane could take no more. “‘Liked’ you?” Taking her face in his hand, he shook his head. “Are you kidding me?”

  “—and I love you for that,” Gabby finished, breathless. “I do. I love you, Shane. So that’s … all I came here to say.”

  “And now you’ve said it.”

  “Right.” Bravely, she inhaled. “I have. So now I guess I—”

  Shane stroked her cheek with his thumb. He sighed.

  “You’re cute when you’re delusional,” he said. “You actually seem to think I’m going to let you go.”

  “You are.” Gabby blinked. “You seemed pretty determined to do that a few minutes ago. And earlier, when you ducked me.”

  “I wasn’t ducking you. I was avoiding the police,” Shane clarified. “Also, that was before you made that very sappy, very sweet, very sentimental love declaration.”

  “Don’t try to tell me you didn’t like it.” Her eyes flashed at him, full of vivacity and conviction. “I know you did.”

  “I’m not going to try to tell you that. First of all, it wouldn’t be true,” Shane said. “Second of all … I’m going to beat you. I’m going to make the biggest, baddest, most heartfelt—”

  “You’re competing with me to say ‘I love you’?”

  “I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t.”

  As though considering that, Gabby examined him. She shook her head. “I don’t think you can win. Did you hear me just now? That was a fantastic love declaration. It was sweet and personal and meaningful. I
t was, if I say so myself, really good.”

  “I loved it, and I can beat it,” Shane promised her.

  “All right, then. Go ahead. Take your best shot.”

  “All right, I will.” Feeling his heart swell with affection for her, Shane brought his mouth to hers. He kissed her.

  He felt as if he were toppling into heaven. Upside down.

  When he pulled away again, Gabby was gazing at him through dazzled eyes. “Very nice. But nonverbals don’t count.”

  “I know. That was the warm-up.”

  “I do feel pretty warm.”

  “You just wait.” Shane inhaled, then regarded her seriously. “After I’ve said my piece, you’ll be really warm.”

  She grinned. “You’re bluffing.”

  “I’m creating anticipation,” Shane disagreed. Then, taking the final step he’d resisted for so long—because Gabby had been right after all, about him wanting to ensure success with her by “fixing” things first—he threw aside all his plans. “I’m getting ready to knock your socks off.”

  “Now you’re stalling.”

  “Wow, tough crowd.”

  Gabby’s arched eyebrow prodded him on.

  Full of mingled certainty and trepidation, Shane took her hand. He looked straight at her. “I love you, Gabby.”

  She smiled at him. A moment passed. Birdsong rang out.

  Abraham Lincoln seemed to glower down at them.

  “Is that it?” Gabby asked. “Because my socks are still on.”

  “No.” Somberly, Shane shook his head. “How could that be it? You’re the woman who saved my life! You’re the woman who showed me how to have a life in the first place. You’re the woman who taught me what it’s like to really laugh, to really worry, to really work hard.”

  “You are the best mopper Campania’s ever had.”

  “You made me earn my place with you, and I’m grateful to you for that. Because you showed me the kind of man I could be—”

  “The kind of man who still can’t beat me at this?”

  “—and that man is more than an abandoned kid, more than a troublemaking teenager, more than a loner who knows how to fix things for people who don’t deserve it.” Shane went on steadfastly, “Because of you, I know there’s more to me than rule breaking and rebellion. There’s heart and soul—”

  “And lots of stuff that still doesn’t begin with L-O-V-E.”

  “—and a sexual capacity I’d never truly tapped—”

  “Hubba-hubba.” Gabby’s grin widened.

  “—and a whole lot of love. For you,” Shane finished, ardently and absolutely. “Because I do love you, Gabby. When you’re around, the sun shines brighter and the rain doesn’t matter.” A few drizzly drops slid down his face, punctuating that fact. “When you’re around, I feel as though I could move mountains or write songs or create miracles—”

  “Your mushroom-chopping ability has gotten pretty miraculous, given your rocky start.”

  “—and the only thing better than seeing you smile at me is hearing you laugh,” Shane said. “Or maybe feeling you hug me. Or maybe, you know, listening to that sexy little moan you give, urging me on, right before you—”

  “You’re getting off track, hot stuff.”

  She was right. Inhaling, Shane refocused on Gabby. “I love you because you’re you, Gabby. I love you because together we’re so much better than we are apart. I love you because I need to see that smile of yours every single day. Because without it, I’m pretty sure I might die of longing. I’ve needed you for a long time, and I didn’t even know it. But now that you’re here with me, giving me another chance, I’ll be damned if I’ll blow it.” Shane hauled in a deep breath. “Whatever it takes, I’ll be there for you. Whatever you need, I’ll give it. If I don’t already have it, I’ll find it. I’ll track it down and I’ll bring it to you, and if that doesn’t work, then I’ll start all over again.”

  “You’re getting a little warmer now.” Gabby sniffled.

  “I’ll give you everything I have to make you happy,” Shane promised, feeling his heart finally overload with fondness for her. He gave her a crooked smile. “Because if there’s one good thing about being abandoned and alone and unloved so far—”

  “Oh, Shane.” This time, Gabby did cry. “You’re not unloved.”

  “—it’s that I have a hell of a lot of love to share with the right person. I have a lifetime’s worth of love stored up,” Shane went on, needing her to know it. “I want to give it to you, Gabby. Every day, I want you to know you’re loved. When you wake up, I want my smile to be the first thing you see. When you go to sleep, I want my arms around you to be the last thing you feel. In between, I want you to know that I love you with all I have, and you will never have to want for more. You’re mine,” Shane said fiercely. “You’re the woman I love, and you’re going to know it. You’re going to feel it. You’re going to love it.”

  Helplessly, Gabby swiped at her teary eyes. She sniffled, then gazed up at him with an abashed look. “Call it a tie?”

  Their love-declaration competition. Shane grinned.

  “Let’s call it the truth and leave it at that,” he said, squeezing her rain-drizzled, tear-dampened hand. “Because that’s what it is. The truth is that I love you. Completely.”

  “You don’t know all of me yet.”

  “I’ll love those parts of you, too,” Shane vowed. “Easy.”

  Gabby’s earnest gaze met his again. Her short hair clung to her cheeks, making her look impish and sweet. “Honest Abe wouldn’t approve of you, you know.”

  Shane glanced up at his weathered bronze face. “Why not?”

  “Because you fibbed.” Gabby smiled. “You said you were bad at making flowery, over-the-top declarations.”

  “I guessed.” Shane shrugged. “I’ve never tried before.” He gave her a compelling look. “I’ve never wanted to. Until you.”

  “Well, in that case, I guess yours was … adequate.”

  “‘Adequate’?” Laughing, Shane kissed her. “I love that you’re so tough, too. I respect that. It’s sexy. It’s … you.”

  “All right, all right.” With pretend surrender, Gabby held up her hands. “That tipped you over the top. You win.”

  “We both win,” Shane disagreed. “Because we found each other. And then we temporarily lost each other. And then, before we could lose each other for good, we found each other again.”

  “All’s well that ends well?”

  “Damn straight, it is.”

  Feeling … strange, all of a sudden, Shane drew in a breath, trying to puzzle out what it was. Then he figured it out.

  He was feeling content. This was happiness he felt.

  With Gabby. He felt happy being with Gabby.

  And all he’d needed to do was become utterly vulnerable—in public and under Abraham Lincoln’s stern sculpted gaze—to accomplish that. Shane could hardly believe he’d survived it.

  “So …” Biting her lip, Gabby eyed her bicycle. “What are you up to next? Because I probably shouldn’t really park here.”

  Shane grinned. Same Gabby. Same woman he loved.

  “You probably shouldn’t get frisky out here beneath this statue, either,” Shane surmised, “but you look pretty hot—”

  “In my grimy, rain-soaked chef’s whites and clogs?”

  “—and I have half a mind to show you, in explicit and naughty detail, exactly how happy I am that we’re together.”

  “We shouldn’t,” Gabby said. “Honest Abe would not approve.”

  “Who cares?” Shane pulled her nearer. Their bodies smacked together, sprinkled by rain and heated by desire, surrounded by elm trees and possibility. “Not me.” He gave Gabby an intense, passionate look. “Not you, either, after I’ve kissed you again.”

  She looked alarmed. Also, intrigued. Then, “Hold on! Your place is right around the corner,” Gabby reminded him. “Rather than commit public indecency, maybe we should go there.”

  “We ca
n’t,” Shane told her. “I’ve moved out. I left the keys with the manager. Technically, I’m temporarily homeless.”

  “Hmm. My place feels very far away right now,” Gabby said saucily. “And we can’t go to Campania, because I’m on vacation.”

  “You’re on vacation?”

  “My crew made me do it. It’s a long story.”

  Shane figured he’d get the details later. “In that case …”

  “In that case? Do you have an idea?”

  “Yeah.” Shane shouldered his carry-on bag. “I was headed for the airport anyway, and I’ve got money I haven’t even spent yet.” Speculatively, he studied Gabby. “Let’s run away.”

  She shook her head. “Uh-uh. I’m trying not to run away.”

  “Let’s run away together,” Shane specified. “Let’s go someplace warm and not rainy, where we can drink margaritas and go crazy with each other. Let’s kick off this thing right.”

  Gabby’s gaze shone with eagerness. “Together? As in, you and me stuck together for days in a remote tropical location?”

  “A remote tropical luxurious location,” Shane coaxed, hoping to sweeten the deal. “It’ll either make us or break us. I think, make us.” He smiled. “We can make up for lost time.”

  “But we haven’t had any lost time,” Gabby argued, looking mystified. “We don’t have anything to make up for. Not yet.”

  “What do you call all the decades before we knew one another?” Shane angled his head sideways, wordlessly urging her to agree. “I call that lost time. Because you weren’t there.”

  “Aw.” Softening, Gabby leaned up. She kissed him. “If you keep this up, I’m going to think you’re not so tough after all.”

  When it came to her, Shane knew, he wasn’t.

  He was a pushover, all the way through.

  He scoffed. “I’m super tough. Let’s go. Right now.”

  Gabby didn’t move. “I love it when you’re bossy,” she said. “Because I know you’re really sweet underneath.”

  “I love it when you’re bossy,” Shane returned, “because usually, in the next few minutes, you get naked.”