by Blue Saffire
My heart feels a ping. I know he’s talking about his wife’s funeral. Again, I feel like shit. I wasn’t able to save Ellen. This man has lost his wife because of me, and now he is trapped here because his little boy, that has lost his mom, has decided to cling to me.
“None of this is your fault,” LaSalle answers my thoughts. “This one falls on me. I’ll do everything I can to make it right,” he says with such promise.
“I’m not asking you to make this right. Haven’t you done enough for me? You shouldn’t even be here. You’re right, you have things to do. When Sammy wakes, I’ll help you get him to go home,” I say and turn onto my side, facing away from him. “My head’s not hurting as much. I can focus this time.”
“If…,” he pauses for a moment. “If you can show me how, I’d like to know what it is you’ve been doing. I’d like to know how to calm Sammy down myself.”
“Sure,” I whisper. “In the morning.”
“Tasha,” he calls. I squeeze my eyes shut. Is that who I am to him? I’m not sure how I feel about that. When I don’t answer, he murmurs again. “Monique.”
“Yes,” I reply. I wait, but I hear nothing.
I turn over and meet with red rimmed grey eyes. I see so much turmoil in his gaze. A deep seeded war is happening within them.
“What happened to ‘normal’,” Sam asks when I lock eyes with him. I wrinkle my brows at his words. “I gave you a chance to live the life you wanted. I made sure no one would bother you. You did nothing with it. Why not?”
I look down and run his words through my head. I remember that night. The night I lost Carlton. I remember LaSalle’s words.
“We are a lot alike. I think you should take this as an out. Take off, go be normal. I will make sure your back is covered. Just do me a favor and live the life we both want. At least one of us should.”
I can hear the words like it was yesterday, but I don’t have an answer. I don’t know what happened after that night. I thought I was going to find what I was looking for. I tried to live the life I had once thought I wanted.
I just never found what I was looking for. “I lost my way,” I mutter to my own thoughts. “I could see others around me finding their happiness. I just couldn’t see mine. It was never right. Something was always missing.”
I watch as he takes in my words. He nods and looks down at Sammy in his arms. I can see the wheels turning. When he looks back up, I see nothing but pain.
“I keep turning it all over in my head. You didn’t take the gift I gave you. Ellen didn’t trust me with the life I gave her,” Sam stops talking and presses his lips firmly. “Forget I said anything. Get some sleep.”
“For the record, I did try. I didn’t take your gift for granted,” I whisper.
LaSalle nods, but he says nothing at first. I feel my heart stop when he does speak. “It just wasn’t enough. I didn’t do enough,” he murmurs.
“LaSalle,” I go to reply, but he gives me a hard look.
“I told you before. You don’t want to know LaSalle. Call me, Sam.”
I nod and lick my lips. He will always be LaSalle to me, but I’ll respect his wishes. I clear my throat and start again.
“My life has been in danger more times than I’d like to count. There’s one thing that has been a common denominator each time. You were there to save me. Whether from danger or from myself. It has been more than enough every single time,” I say firmly this time.
Sam swallowed hard and looks away. He doesn’t reply this time, so after a few beats I turn my back again. I feel like I can hear his thoughts this time. He’s still blaming himself for all of this.
I don’t know what to say, because in my head this is all my fault. I should have shot that bitch first. If bullets weren’t flying at me, I would have shot her first.
I’m going to kill you, Misha. You cost my guardian angel his wife. I’m going to see you bleed. You sent people for me, now I’m coming for you.
chapter six
Sister-Sister
Kurtrina
I can’t stop running. I have to keep moving. I won’t take this to Brenda’s door. I saw the news. They are trying to cover it up, but the same bastard’s that showed their asses up at my place went after my other sister, I know it in my heart.
I’ve never met Monique, and now I’m not sure I will get to. I’m running for my life. The text that sent me running from the restaurant, where I was supposed to have lunch with my sisters, Brenda and Monique, said that Keisha was murdered.
It was a warning for me to get my shit and run. Faina Krupin has been keeping me in the loop with my sister for seven years, behind her nephew’s back. I still remember the day she showed up on my doorstep with a bag of cash.
“My nephew possessive. You will not see sister again, useless Misha wants. Keisha tell me of sister here in America. I know you struggle. This will help,” Faina told me, as she stood on my run-down apartment door step.
“Why do you want to help me? You don’t know me, and my sister and I haven’t seen each other in years,” I grumbled folding my arms over my chest.
“You do not understand the type of man your sister has gotten involved with. People will hurt you, to hurt her and him. Take this,” she thrust the money in my direction. “I will keep eye on you. I tell you run, you run. There is enough to live and something to put away to run.”
With that, Faina Krupin was off. I stood confused, holding a bag of what I would learn to be one and a half million dollars. It took me a week to decide what to do.
I decided right after Faina sent me the first letter. It pretty much told me the address to my new apartment and that I had no choice but to move. The big Russian guy that dropped the letter off, stood waiting for me to get my things so he could drive me to my new place.
Afanasy became a fixture in my life from that day. I should have known something wasn’t right when he didn’t show up for dinner. Afanasy is the only person in the world I can trust.
I hold in my sob and push forward. I don’t even know if he is still alive. I found the note on my kitchen table. It was in Faina’s handwriting. Two simple words slashed across the page.
Run. Now.
I didn’t think twice, I run for my closet for the bag I have kept there and I started to get the hell out of there. Afanasy and I joked about this damn blonde wig so many times, but it saved my life. They walked right by me, I heard them murmuring to each other as they passed by.
They weren’t Russian. Afanasy has taught me to speak Russian. He said it was good for me to know. If his uncle ever sent someone for me, I would understand them and know to run.
No, these men were speaking something else. It was close enough to Russian for me to pick up a few words and phrases, but it was not Russian. I made it out of the lobby of my building before an explosion went off on my floor.
I took off running and never turned back. That was four days ago. I’ve been clinging to the shadows, trying to decide my next move. I’ve thought about going to my brother.
I just don’t know how he will feel about me. I know Monique wanted nothing to do with meeting me. Brenda had waited until the last minute to tell her about our lunch. From the sound of Brenda’s voice when we spoke the night before our lunch date, I’m not even sure Monique ever planned on showing up.
I don’t know what to do. I don’t feel like I can trust anyone right now. I’m afraid to try to travel. It may give my location away to whoever’s trying to find me, if I purchase a plane ticket.
I know, I know. I watch too much TV and read too many suspense books. However, I’ll take my chances on my over active imaginations at this point. It’s kept me alive the pass four days. Something I can’t say for my sister, Keisha.
I’m getting hungry. I don’t think my stomach will be able to take one more street dog or greasy Knish. My stomach gurgles at the thought. I dip into an alley, pressing my back to the wall and closing my eyes to think.
I need food and some place to lay my he
ad for a few hours. I have cash on me. I think it’s time to find a little place. I’m exhausted, I can’t keep moving.
Afanasy said that if anything like this ever happened, I should leave the city on the fifth day. He would find me by the fifth day, if not, I should become ghost. I’m losing hope that I will ever see him again.
“Never close your eyes and lose awareness,” a thick Russian accent rumbles through the alley, causing me to nearly jump out of my skin.
I open my eyes and I swear the man before me looks like a large bear. He has a hard, but ruggedly handsome face. Dark hair and thick brows. His face is covered in a thick beard and his dark eyes are locked steadily on me.
My flight instincts have not kicked in. I’m frozen in spot. My cross-trainers feel like they have been glued to the dirty New York cement. My jeans feel heavy like they have been soaked and are now weighing me down.
The hoodie I have on is covering my face, hopefully covering the split second that fear enters my eyes. I don’t know if I can even move fast enough. Suddenly, my backpack seems so weighted. I knew I should have kept moving. Why the hell did I stop?
“You are scaring her,” I hear the familiar voice of my friend.
My eyes flicker to the bear of a man’s side and sure enough a bruised looking Afanasy, is standing at his side. I bite back a sob and lunge myself forward into Afanasy’s arms, knocking my hoodie off my head. My blonde wig revealing itself. This man has become the brother I never knew I wanted or needed.
When his arm wrap around me, the dams break. I didn’t realize how much I needed him, or how much I feared I would never see him again.
“Shh, little one. You’re safe now. Faina may be my boss, but Misha all of our boss. He has given the word for your safety. We take you to new home. This Shura, Misha trust him, I trust him. Come,” Afanasy says soothingly.
“But Faina’s note said to run,” I say shakily. “My sister has been murdered and one of the others has been attacked right here in New York.”
“For that I am sorry,” Shura speaks up. His voice hard, but a soft sadness is in his dark eyes. “Keisha was like daughter to me. I will forever resent not being there for her.”
“You knew my sister,” I ask, narrowing my eyes at this man.
“Yes, and your niece. Speaking of your niece. I would like to get back to hotel. It will make me feel better to be with her.”
“Keisha’s little girl,” I gasp the question, already knowing the answer. My heart aches with the knowledge of what I’ve lost and missed out on.
I never wanted to leave my sister behind. She was my twin. We had a special bond. I just couldn’t take what was going on in our adopted family a moment longer. When I asked her to come with me and she refused, I left and didn’t look back. If I looked back, I would have gone for my sister.
My chest aches, maybe I should have. Maybe if I had, she’d still be alive. I look down at my shoes. I have so many regrets.
“Yes, once I get you settled. I can go back to her,” Shura says.
I look back up into Shura eyes. “I would like to meet her, to see my niece,” I lick my dry lips and hold my breath.
Afanasy and Shura look at each other. My brows knit as I watch the look that passes between them. I shift on my feet, questioning for the first time in years if I can trust Afanasy.
He turns to me and gives me a weird look. “We will get you settled first. Then we will see what Misha wants,” Afanasy says, he winces as soon as the words fall out of his mouth.
Like I said we know each other. He knows I’m about to light into his ass. I don’t know much about the man my sister ran off with. Faina has always made it seem as if I should steer clear of him and my sister’s life. Now, my niece is all I have left of my sister.
If she is here in New York, nothing will keep me away from meeting her. She’s my niece. I narrow my eyes at Afanasy, but Shura speaks up.
“Give Misha time, Keisha was important to him. This is all hard. There are things you won’t understand about Misha. It will be best to wait,” Shura says.
I roll my lips getting ready to argue, but I bite back my retort and nod curtly. I’m too exhausted to put up a fight. After some rest, I’ll revisit this. I don’t care who this Misha is, or about the fact that he has everyone around here shook to death.
“Fine, I’m hungry and tired,” I huff. I start to walk beside Afanasy, then pause. I look up at him and give a firm glare. “I need to know…Monique?”
“She is recovering. As I said, Misha has given word. No one will dare to touch you. He has made himself clear,” Afanasy replies.
“For now,” Shura murmurs, causing me to turn and look at him sharply. “Things will change.”
“Enough,” Afanasy spits harshly.
Shura glares at us both and shrugs. “I have job to do. Get girl to safety and report back to Misha. Let’s go.”
With that we disappear deeper into the shadows. Something about it all feels like I’m walking further into the rabbit hole, instead of heading out. So many things are floating through my sleepy brain, but I’m too tired to focus on a single one.
chapter seven
Friends or Foes
Bobby
“Are you sure about this?” I breathe into the phone, stunned.
“Yeah, I’m just as shocked as you are,” Felix replies. “I mean I don’t know why I’m surprised. She’s the only one I know that could pull something like this off and not get caught. She had me and almost tripped Nellie up. The woman is amazing. The two of them have me feeling inferior at the moment.”
“But why,” I furrow my brows as I look over the email Felix Black sent me.
“No fucking clue, Bro. Wyatt’s pissed,” he replies.
“Yeah, he’s not the only one. If Nick knows about this shit…,” I pause and shake my head to myself. I don’t understand why the hell Sephora Lincoln would do this.
“She’s tight with Ry. He wants to talk to her,” Felix suggests.
“No, I don’t want anyone to do anything. I’ll get to the bottom of this. Listen, my brother is fucked up at the moment. He doesn’t need to know about this yet,” I sigh. “Let me handle it.”
“You sure, Lincoln and Sophi are right here. We can find out what the hell is going on in no time,” Felix offers.
“This is a sticky situation. I’d prefer to handle it,” I reply.
Felix laughs. “Always the fixer. I get it. Well, I’m here if you need me. Same for everyone else. As I said, Nellie is just as good as Sephora. I would love to see them go head to head.”
“I’ll be in touch. I’m going to get to the bottom of this,” I grumble.
I hang up the phone and stare out of my office window. So much isn’t adding up. I’m starting to believe Ellen didn’t have anything to do with the divorce papers, but I won’t tell that to Sam. He has enough on his plate. He is trusting me to figure this out and that’s just what I’ll do.
“You’re going to need to talk to me sooner or later,” my wife’s voice pulls me back into the room.
I turn my head to find her standing in the middle of my office. She looks sexy as hell in a simple navy sheath dress and black heels. The a-symmetrical neckline calls attention to her delicate collarbone.
Her sever bun is back in place, gone are the layers I’ve become so fond of running my fingers through. It causes me to realize it’s been far too long since my wife has been able to let her hair down. The firm is busy, which is great, but it is showing.
“We talk all the time,” I reply.
Paige narrows her eyes just as I knew she would. I turn fully and shove my hands in my pants pockets. I know Paige is going to watch my every move to read what she wants from me.
“Bobby, let me remind you that I’m no fool. I’m watching you. I see the changes. I see the moves Camille has been making. I was supposed to be her remember. Your dad was grooming me for something in particular,” Paige crosses her arms over her chest. “MatteoBobby Locatelli, play with som
eone that doesn’t pay attention.”
I tilt my head at my wife and sigh. “Where have you heard that name?” I ask slowly.
“A few years back your father asked me to draw up a contract for a partnership for some club in Italy. I didn’t work on the details of the club. James said he would handle that part with a liaison from Italy. I did, however, list all parties involved.
“I thought little of it at the time. However, three names stood out in my head and I banked them for later. Matteo Bobby Locatelli, LaSalle Samuel Locatelli, and Alessandro Marcucio Locatelli.
“Bobby just because I don’t say anything, doesn’t mean I don’t know things. So, what’s up? Let me help you,” Paige says, as she walks over to me and stop right before me.
“The less you know the better. Those names are best left unsaid. Are things changing? —yes. Should you worry? —no. I have some things I need to get to the bottom of, but everything is fine,” I reply pulling one hand from my pocket to cup her face.
Paige searches my face for a long moment. “Don’t underestimate what I will do for you and our family,” Paige says, causing my heart to swell with more love than I can handle.
I love this woman with my soul. She knows just how to be there for me. When to push and when not to push. I almost tell her everything; my concerns, my burdens of what’s to come, my changing role.
I feel like my life is taking a turn I never asked for. It’s like I’m watching it happen from outside my body. We always thought Sam was the only one being groomed for the other family business. Lately, I’m getting the feeling that’s not so true.
“I will never underestimate you, just as I know you won’t underestimate me,” I respond.
Paige nods. “Go handle your business. I’m meeting Cam to help out with the arrangements.”
“I love you,” I dip my head to deliver a searing kiss. I couldn’t even imagine what my brother must be going through. I kiss my wife as if it’s the last time I’ll ever get to.
“I love you too,” she purrs when I finally break the kiss. “If you won’t let me in, at least stop leaving Nate out.”
