Missing Grace

by S. L. Scott

  Emily tilted her head in sympathy and took hold of Jane’s hand again. “I’m sorry to hear that. I know this must be very difficult for you, and for him.”

  “We’ve never fought like that before.” She whispered, “I don’t think I can marry him. I saw a different side of him. It scared me, actually. It’s as if he is determined to marry me more than he wants me to find the truth. He wants me to push my past aside until after we’re married. I don’t understand it.”

  “What? You can’t just push your life aside and replace it with three years that didn’t include the people who love you, the ones who’ve missed you, the person who searched for you every day of those three years.”

  “I know,” Jane admitted. “He’s asked me to set who I am aside for him. Now that I know my real name, and with Ben here to help me, he suddenly offered to help me find my family.”

  “You mean he forbade you from looking before?”

  Phrasing it that way had Jane blinking in surprise. Had it felt as if he had forbidden her searching? Why would I let someone control me like that? That’s not who I am. It’s as though being around Ben, and now Emily, I am finding the real me. Grace. Not Jane. “I don’t think forbidden is the right word, but perhaps strongly urged would be more accurate. But sitting here with you, I can’t recall why. I do remember him saying he had checked the missing persons reports when I was in rehab. I wonder now if it was a sense of gratitude to all he had done for me that I didn’t think to question him. Why would I not trust him? But we’ve been engaged for nine months now, which in the scheme of things, doesn’t seem that long.”

  “Oh, Grace. I don’t know what’s going on with you and . . . him, but it’s hard for me to imagine you with anyone but my brother. I used to envy how close you were, but I also loved that the two people I’ve loved most my whole life were so happy.” Jane felt tears shimmering in her eyes again, but desperately held them back. “You can’t just discard Ben. He’s dedicated his life to finding you. He left everything behind for you.”

  This time she took Emily’s hand. “I wouldn’t. I don’t think I could anyway.”

  “Please, Grace. Please remember what he’s done, what he’s sacrificed.”

  “I will.” Nodding again. “I do. Ben said something the other day that made me think. He asked me if I could have my parents at my wedding, wouldn’t I want that? Yes, of course I would and that has made me realize that I have to fly back and meet them.”

  Emily smiled while Jane talked about Ben and all he told her, convincing her that she needed her family as much as they need her. “As his sister, I’ve never been more proud of him. As your friend, I’ve never been more proud of you.”

  Jane was surprised to hear this and pointed to her chest. “Me? Why would you be proud of me?”

  “Oh Grace, I wish you could see youself as the person I do. You’re so strong. You’re taking everything in your stride, but protecting yourself. I see the friend I’ve known since I was ten.”

  Jane smiled, but felt shy. “Thank you. I may not be able to remember it, but I feel our friendship inside.”

  “That means more to me than you know. I’ve missed you so much.”

  She didn’t know what to say. Emily’s so open and honest. “I’m lucky to know you now.” She took a sip of wine, and then said, “Now. Let’s talk about this trip I hear you’re going on.”

  “Seattle. Ben promised to take me to all the places I used to love. Even though I didn’t know it was home, I’m so excited to be going. I’m hoping that by being around some of my stuff I might remember more.”

  Emily sat back, and smiled. “I can’t believe he’s taking you to the apartment.”

  “What apartment?” Jane tilted her head at Emily in confusion.

  The question seemed innocent enough, but Jane realized it wasn’t when Emily looked uncomfortable and started looking for the waitress. “Are you okay, Emily?”

  “I’m fine. I, um, you don’t know about the apartment?”

  Jane bit the inside of her cheek trying to recall if an apartment was ever mentioned. “No, I guess not.”

  Emily lowered her voice to signify the importance of what she was about to share. “You and Ben own an apartment in downtown Seattle together. You lived there before your accident.”

  It wasn’t the living with Ben part that shocked her. It was the first part of owning one. “As in we still own the apartment?”

  Emily nodded. “He couldn’t bring himself to sell it because that meant producing a death certificate, and he refused to apply for one. I know my brother has told you he didn’t stop searching for you. Believe me when I say, he never gave up on you. He also hasn’t been back to Seattle since the day you disappeared.”

  “I don’t understand,” Jane said as her heart raced.

  “He flew to Chicago when you disappeared to search for you, and he never returned, not even for the holidays. He couldn’t. He told me it would be too painful without you there with him. So, yes, you own an apartment and nothing has been touched since you left that morning.” This was staggering to Jane. How could one man love someone so much? So sacrificially? “I hired a cleaning service that goes by once a month, even though Ben hasn’t been back.” Emily’s voice wavered, and Jane could tell this was hard for her, too. “I stop by every couple of months. I feel closer to you there than anywhere else. I can sit and be alone. I sound crazy, but I’ve gone and talked to you. Sometimes I talk to my brother there too. He’s not been the same since you disappeared, so I lost you both that day.” Emily looked away, as if trying to rein in her emotions. Ben had been right to goad me the other night. My disappearance had certainly not just affected me, and I was only now beginning to understand the true ripple effect.

  Jane wanted to hug her pain away, but she was also getting choked up.

  “If a space can represent its owners, that apartment does—all the photos, the décor, the knickknacks, the books. I go there to be with you in spirit. Sometimes I smile when there and sometimes I cry.”

  Jane ducked her head under her hands and silently cried. Ben hadn’t told her about the place, and she didn’t know if he had planned to take her there or not, but now she knew she had to go.

  “Grace, as I said, I know this must be extremely difficult for you right now, but it’s been hard on Ben, too. After that fight, and then you just vanishing like that—”

  Jane could tell the toll her disappearance had taken on Ben physically because she had seen the pictures of him before when they were happy. “Wait, what fight?”

  Emily’s arm covered her stomach as if she was suddenly feeling sick. She ducked her head under a hand and sighed. When she looked back up, she said, “I’m only trying to help and I feel like I just betrayed my brother. I thought you knew. I’m sorry. I’m screwing up so much today. I just, I don’t know everything he’s told you or not told you. You must be very curious now, but I really thought Ben had told you.”

  “He hasn’t. We don’t seem to get into too many details when we’re together. There are so many strong feelings there that sometimes words aren’t needed.”

  “I shouldn’t say any more. I feel like we’re talking behind his back in a way that would hurt him. You need to talk to him about the morning you left for Chicago.”

  Jane understood what Emily meant. She really did, but it was frustrating just the same and another reason she needed to go back to Seattle with him.

  “I’m determined to go, Emily. I have to find out who I am.”

  “I think that’s the right decision.”

  Jane took her phone out of her purse and called Ben right then.

  “Hey. Grace?” His voice was unrushed, but nervous.

  “Ben, I’ll go. Tonight. I’ll go back to Seattle with you.”

  “Yeah?” She could feel his smile through that simple answer.

  “Yes. Thank you for going with me. Send me your flight details and I’ll book myself on the same flight.”

  “I’ll book the ti
ckets.”

  “I can’t have you do that. I’m sure they’ll be expensive since they’re last minute.”

  “I want to do this for you.”

  “I feel like I owe you so much already.”

  “You don’t owe me anything, Grace. You’re alive. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

  His words touched her heart, and she could never deny that they reached her soul. “Thank you, Ben.”

  “You’re welcome. I’ll text you the details shortly.”

  After they hung up, Jane looked up with a mixture of excitement and worry swirling inside. “I’m really gonna do this.”

  “You really are,” Emily added. “And it’s going to be fantastic. I don’t know how long you’re going, but do you think you’ll stop by my parents’ house? You can meet them. Well, you already technically know them, but you can meet them again. I know they’d love to see you. You were very close to them, like a daughter.” Like a daughter. Why did I give up that need to know my past to please Hunter? Why did he ask me to? So much pain could have been avoided. Things may have been different.

  “Do you think I’m doing the right thing, Emily?” Jane looked her directly in the eyes.

  “Will I sound biased if I say yes?”

  “Not if it’s truly how you feel.”

  “Well, I don’t care if I do sound biased. I absolutely think you’re doing the right thing, and if other people in your life don’t think so, screw ’em. You have us, and we’ll be there for you every step of the way.”

  The thing was, there wasn’t a them to even say screw ’em to. How sad was that? There was only Hunter. Only Hunter.

  I want to find my family. “You’re right. Screw him. I’m Grace Stevens and I’m ready to reclaim my life.”

  16

  Ben Edwards

  Ben wrapped up his work the best he could on such short notice and prepared to leave for the next few days. He didn’t know when Grace wanted to return, so he booked for two nights assuming it would be an issue with Barnes after that.

  He was already dealing with a text he received from Emily before lunch. The question rolled around his mind, and he tried to reason with it. Looking at his phone again, he read: Was Hunter her attending doctor after the accident? Is that how they met?

  Such an obvious question that he hadn’t thought to ask Grace about, but he intended to find out.

  Ben said goodbye to his assistant and left. He had a ton of vacation time earned since he never used any and though it was a spur-of-the-moment trip, his boss was thrilled he was finally taking some time off. To Ben, Grace was still an apparition and he worried she would disappear any moment if he didn’t keep his eyes on her.

  When he went home Emily wasn’t there, and even though he felt bad that he would only be there for one night of her visit, he knew he’d see her back in Washington. They had needed the time together, and it was wonderful to see her, but Grace was his priority right now. Grace had always been his priority.

  Since he booked a six o’clock flight back to Seattle, he rushed around his apartment packing his bag. Ben texted Grace the details as soon as he booked the tickets and now it was up to her to follow through. She had asked to meet him at the airport, which gave him just enough room for concern to seep in. There was a part of him—the part that saw Jane as a phantom in his waking hours—that believed she wouldn’t show up for the flight. Faith. He had to have faith like he’d had the last three years.

  One thing had been nagging Ben since the text with Emily. He wasn’t sure if it even mattered but he was curious. Was Barnes Grace’s doctor after the accident? She said he’s been there for her, but was he there for her more than a doctor? Ben sat down at his desk and pulled up the notes he’d taken detailing his hospital search for Grace. He had visited every hospital three times the week after the accident: the first trip was the day after she disappeared, the second was a two-day follow-up, and the third was a week after that. None of them turned up anything at all. The visits had continued, but he never met Dr. Barnes. Not once. He had never even seen him before the awards dinner. Something about him bothered Ben, but he struggled to identify it, believing he was upset Barnes was engaged to the love of Ben’s life. That was reason enough to dislike him. It was more than dislike though. It was distrust. He just seemed . . . calculating.

  After that third visit, he changed tactics and questioned workers at the airport and the airline she had flown to Chicago, but that was a dead end too because she had made it safely to Chicago. She had disappeared after that.

  Ben had gone over these notes so many times over the years, but he hadn’t seen them in a while and suddenly found himself nervous by what he might find. Since he had typed them up and kept them in his Grace folder on his computer, he just clicked through the pages until he came across Chicago Memorial.

  He scrolled down until that part of the document came into view.

  Chicago Memorial – May 14th.

  Nurse: Jennifer Foster – left picture. Helpful – passed photo around and posted in employee lounges. Gave to Dr. Barnes to post in doctors lounge.

  Follow-up visit: May 16th.

  Third visit: May 23rd.

  Sucker-punched. A whoosh of air abandoned Ben’s lungs. He felt like he’d been punched. It couldn’t be right. He stared at the screen as rage blinded him.

  No!

  No.

  No.

  This can’t be. He shook his head in disbelief not wanting to comprehend that someone could be that deceitful. That someone who claimed to love his Grace, or anyone for that matter, would purposely keep them from their loved ones. Dr. Barnes had been given the flyer of Grace to post in the doctors lounge.

  He knew! Like Rebecca, he’d known Grace’s real identity. But why? Why would he do that?

  Ben tried in vain to get his anger under control, but he was struggling. He slammed his fist down on the desk so hard that the wood shook under his hand and made the framed picture fall flat. He immediately picked it up and set it in its proper place, glad the glass wasn’t broken.

  As his eyes made their way back to the screen, his phone beeped alerting him that it was time to leave for the airport. Ben debated what to do. Should he confront Barnes with this information, call Grace and tell her, or head to the airport? Yet, now, even in light of the godawful revelation, the decision was easy. He shut down his computer and grabbed his suitcase. Ben just hoped Grace showed up. He decided it was best to give her the information in person. He would not be like him. He would not deceive her. Ben loved her too much to hide behind lies. It wouldn’t be the first thing he told her, but he would find the right time to tell her and then tell her everything else he knew.

  17

  Jane Parker

  Jane couldn’t gather her stuff together fast enough.

  She pulled some of her favorite outfits along with a few comfy clothes for travel and piled them on the bed. She had everything together before she went into one of the extra bedrooms with a stepladder to pull a suitcase down from the closet shelf that would be big enough. Pushing the carry-on aside, she reached for the larger luggage. Jane grabbed the handle and pulled. She almost fell but caught her balance and dropped the suitcase to the floor below her. As she straightened back up, still standing on the top step of the ladder, she saw a small box or something on the shelf.

  She climbed off the ladder and moved it one step closer to the shelf. As she stood on the top step, she could just barely reach it with her fingertips. Taking the small package in hand, she climbed off the ladder, setting it on the bed. Why had that been tucked up on a shelf?

  Although Jane was determined to find her past she still didn’t want to needlessly hurt her present. She knew Hunter would be furious and hurt to find her gone and with Ben of all people, but she couldn’t let herself worry about that anymore. If there was ever a time to be selfish, she felt like it was now. Hunter. He’d been good to her, supportive, kind, but the anger she saw earlier caused ripples of anxiety. She put ever
ything else, including the ladder, back in its place, tidied up after herself, and packed her suitcase.

  When she was done, she saw the small package again. Clearly it was Hunter’s because she hadn’t seen it before, but what would he have hidden like that?

  Jane sat on the edge of the bed, her packed suitcase at her feet, and unwound the rubber band three times freeing the paper from around the small box. She set the thick paper aside assuming it was just plain white wrapping and opened the box. Her breath caught in her throat when she laid eyes on the stunning platinum ring with a beautiful diamond solitaire. If there was ever a ring that felt like it was her, this was it. Then her gaze shifted to her left hand. The band of diamonds with the emerald-cut three-carat diamond anchored in the center of gold sparkled in the light as it encircled her finger.

  The ring in the box made no sense. Did Hunter buy two and decide on one over the other? She picked the ring up by the bottom of the band and held it in front of her. Narrowing her eyes, she discovered a small dent on one side and a pretty deep scratch on the bottom side she thought was odd. Overall, it looked to be in good condition, and the beautiful design brought a smile to her face.

  Jane twirled it between her fingertips as she stared at the diamond. It still made no sense to her why he had another ring. Maybe it was his mother’s. An heirloom remodeled. She knew he wasn’t into antiques, so she was certain if his mother offered the ring he would have been quick to replace it with something more in line with his taste. Platinum was one of the strongest metals out there, so whatever had caused the damage must have been severe. Holding it up to the light, she thought about it just as a bolt of pain shot through her.

  “Grace Elizabeth Stevens, will you marry me?”

  She gasped for air and stood up abruptly throwing her hand over her heart. “Ben.”

  Her hand shook. His proposal. His ring. Her ring. Her hand flew to her mouth in horror. This was her ring from Ben. It would have been on her finger.