The Fire Within (The Fire of The Soul Series)

by Racquel Kechagias

  After breakfast I make my way down past the stables, and to the arena. I pull out the sand filled potato sacks that I have seen Kayden and Shade practicing on, many times before when they are alone in the arena. Thus I know where the dummies are stored, and where I must go to pull them out. I take down my sword from the wall of weaponry. I caress the swords glittering handle, and slowly I approach the dummy. There is a red cross in the middle of the dummy, and I can see that there are multiple stitches on it, where the maids of the castle have sewed it back up. Stitches that show where the blade once cut through the thick skin of the dummy. I don't take these details any further into my mind. All my attention is focused on the sword within my hand, the sword that I swing through the air at the dummy before me. There is the tinkling sound of sand pouring down onto the hay-covered cement. Again I continue to cut up the dummy, slicing at the crumpling figure until it is just an empty sack on a stick.

  I fall to my knees on the ground, my cheeks becoming wet with tears again. I'm not crying over the dummy that I just slaughtered. No, I know that that is not real. My tears are once again for Meg, for all the things that she never had but deserved, for that she could have been, but will never be.

  I don't notice that I'm no longer alone until there is someone else beside me, the strong muscular hands on my shoulders. "Anna," The man breathes and I instantly know who it is. I turn my head into their shoulder and weep. Victor had come to check up on me. He simply holds me until my tears are gone.

  "I came to check up on you in your room, and you weren't there. I was quite worried about you, and then Kayden told me that usually when you are upset or mad you'd come here to let out your anger. I'm glad he's paid quite close attention, it came in handy," Victor says. I stiffen within his arms, hearing in his words Kayden's affections for me. I don't think that Victor even realizes what he is saying.

  "Yes, I usually do come here. It is easier to let out my anger on something that is not real, than to risk hurting someone. And it is good that he pays attention, you wouldn't be here now if he did not," I say smiling at my fiancé, ignoring the small voice at the back of my mind that whispers another name.

  "Anna, I know it's hard to lose someone who is so close to you, and I am deeply sorry that you lost Meg in the worst way possible. However, I think once we have given Meg a proper goodbye, you will be on the road to recovery," Victor says and he stands up, pulling me up to my feet with him. "Astoria asked for me to come and collect you, she has everything organised. Now she is only waiting for you." Victor says as he gently rubs his thumb over my hand. I watch his face carefully, trying to see if he remembers what this feels like, to lose someone close to him.

  "Did it ever stop hurting for you? Did you ever recover from losing your mum and dad?" I ask, my eyes focused though sore and raw from the fresh tears.

  "I never fully recovered. It still hurts from time to time, but eventually you learn how to look past the pain, eventually you find something worth living for," Victor says and I feel as if he means me, that - for him - I was worth living for.

  Not much else is said between us, we both dwell in our thoughts hand in hand as Victor leads me away from the arena. It isn't until I bump into a large rock that I realize our scenery has change quite vastly. There are bare, leafless trees, and there is fog swirling around our feet. The sky has darkened, the clouds are black and it is obvious that there is a storm approaching. I try to sweep the fog away from the rock so that I can inspect it closer. My hands graze on the top of the stone, and I realize from the thinness of the top of the stone, that it isn't a rock or a boulder. For a moment the fog moves long enough for me to see a name; Columbus Menédez.

  "That is my grandfather’s grave; He was murdered in his sleep. My father was only seventeen at the time when it happened. The men on our side of the family have a long history of being assassinated before their time," Victor says, there is a dullness to his words, as if he has already come to accept this, as if he is already expecting his death.

  I rise from my crouching position besides the grave and stand back up beside Victor.

  "And that's why you placed your soul within me." I say, finally piecing the puzzle together. With Victor's soul within me he had a second chance at life, and since he had a long history of family assassination it all made sense. Victor freezes for a moment like a child being caught doing something wrong. He looks quite alarmed, and he starts blubbering nonsense.

  I place a finger on his lips to shush him. "It's alright Victor. It's completely understandable. You didn't do it for yourself, I can see that. You did it for your people, so that their future would be certain, for as long as you lived." His eyes soften as he takes in my words. I lower my hand from his lips and I allow him to take my hand in his. We continue to walk down the path to the church that is now in plain sight.

  The old church is still dusty, though it appears that it has recently been cleaned. Within the church is Augustus, Astoria, Lord Baron, Kayden and Shade. There are also some of the maids there. They must have been friends of Meg's, and I am glad that she had made friends with the staff in her time here. Astoria is standing at the front of the church, before a coffin made of white oak. It is engraved with roses, and I wonder where she got something so beautiful in such short time.

  "If you would all take your seats, the ceremony is about to begin." Astoria's voice is kind but commanding, and no-one dares to disobey her. Everyone takes their seat and I sit down in between Kayden and Victor.

  "Today we are gathered to celebrate the life of a dear friend and warrior, Megaera Spiros. Meg, as she was often known as, was the first warrior to fall at the hands of a Skin-walker that was not only unprepared for the war, but whom was human. Meg came to the Underworld with her life-long friend Anna, and quickly came to serve all of us under the Menédez castle. We were all blessed with her warmth and kindness, and although she was taken from us so quickly, I know that all of us present will miss her dearly. We ask that Manea - our mother of passed spirits - take dear Meg into her bosom tonight. That Manea will guide Meg throughout the High Lands, and lead her to the green pastures of peace that we all hope to find after death. Let us all take a moment of silence, to think of Meg, and the memories that you have shared with her." I see everyone bow their heads in silence and I follow suit. I begin to think of Meg and the memories that we shared, from the first moment that we met, to all our sleepovers. I remember Meg as she was back at home, I remember her strength and bravery, her kindness and loving heart. I remember my best friend, the girl who was the closest thing to a sister for me.

  A minute passes and everyone is now looking back up to Astoria. She has a lit torch within her hands, and she is walking over to the wooden coffin. "In honour of Megaera, with our future-queen's permission, we are giving her the warrior’s funeral. Megaera's body has been wrapped in white cloth and has been coated in the essences of lavender and vanilla. To send her body to Manea she must first meet the flames that symbolize the short flicker of life, and the lasting fire of eternity," Astoria says as she sets the torch upon the coffin, it illuminates the room as if it were the noon sun. All I can think about is Meg in that burning coffin, and I hope that somehow she finds some kind of life after this.

  I watch the coffin burn until there is nothing left, Victor holds on tightly to my hand. I think it's meant to comfort me, to mean somehow that it's going to be okay, but I'm not quite sure that it is. The room should have been filled with smoke as there were no windows in the church but it is completely void of smoke. The coffin is just ashes now on the table that it rested on at the front of the room.

  "Thank you everyone for coming. The ceremony is now complete. If you make your way back to the castle there will be a brief afternoon tea," Astoria says. It doesn't take long before everyone files out of the church. They all make their way back to the castle to enjoy the afternoon tea that Astoria had organised. For a moment it is only Astoria and I within the old church. I turn to the older woman. She too had lost a friend
of hers and a daughter, I wonder if her pain ever left her? Did she still feeling the ache of a missing part of her heart where they belonged?

  "Astoria, can I ask you something?" I say turning to the older woman beside me. She stops for a moment surprised for some reason.

  "Of course Anna," She says as she sits down on a chair. She motions for me to sit down beside her and I do so, as this is not only expected but polite.

  "You've lost people before, Sinistra being one of them. How did you cope with the pain? How did you move on?" I ask, she has a sad lost look on her face. She is clutching onto both of her hands tightly as if to hold herself together.

  "It gets easier after a while but the closer they are to your heart, the harder it is to let them go. It took me two years to understand that Sinistra would have wanted me to live for both of us, and then five years later I learnt how to be able to do that. I of course had to be strong in front of Victor. How could I expect him to be strong, if I was not while I was around him? You're own grief will pass in time Anna, you may never let Meg go, like I never let Sinistra go, but you will learn how to go on. You will learn how to live again even though that she's gone. However, those who are truly in our hearts, those who you truly love never leave us, for they remain apart of us for all the days that we live." I can understand what she's saying, I mean her words are quite clear, but learning how to implement it is harder. We both make our way back up to the castle; I realize how far the church is from the castle on the walk back, how far I walked without knowing it before.

  Perhaps Meg was happier now, safe from harm, and in a world full of peace. At least I hope she is. The day passes quickly although silently. I nap for most of the afternoon and I dream of Meg, of everything that we used to share. Meg's death was uncalled for and cruel. My dreams of happiness and past memories that I shared with Meg turns dark, and my dreams turn to the woman who killed Meg, who took her away from me. My dreams turn to her and it replays that last moment where she tried to kill me. I awake covered in sweet and shaky, the dream having ended where she cuts open my neck, and as lay dying I watch her drink my blood and she turns from being Meg into Me.

  The sun is down when I awake, and I know that it is evening; I know that dinner has not yet passed, and so I make my way downstairs after checking that my appearance isn't too far gone. When I come down stairs everyone is sitting at the dining table.

  We had all planned to be here tonight, it was one of the last nights that we had together before the battle. We all wanted to be able to share one last happy night with each other, to remember each other with. This was something that no-one could take away from us; our memories are ours to keep no matter what happens.

  I take my seat beside Victor and across from Kayden. Shade sits beside Kayden, and across from Victor. Augustus and Astoria sit across from each other, Astoria sitting beside me and Augustus sitting beside Kayden and Lord Baron sits at the head of the table. We are all sitting together, this is our last supper together, and I'm not going to let my grief, and pain stop me from enjoying it.

  We feast on roasted meats and baked vegetables, we have gravy and wine and for desert we have lemon meringue pies, with strawberry sauce drizzled on top.

  "Thank you for all coming tonight. Each one of you are important to me, and that is why I wish to spend this last night with all of you," Victor says and I know that this is true. Why else would we be the people that he spends his every moment with.

  "Unfortunately there is someone missing, and we paid our respects to her today. It is likely that we may lose each other due to this battle and war, and thus our last moments are the most important. It is important to spend it with the right people and I am glad that I am spending it with my bride-to-be, and with you, the closest thing I have left to family," Victor says, he holds my hand upon the table, and I squeeze his hand gently. He gives my hand a squeeze as well.

  "Victor you are quite right. We are all quite anxious to see what the war will bring, if our fates will be good or bad. However, we must not dwell on this tonight; our last supper must be enjoyed. Whatever happens, I am glad that I am here with friends," Augustus says, he smiles at his godson with pride in the way that a father would smile upon his own son. There is pride in Augustus eyes, a knowing that even though Victors own father could not raise him, he knows that Victor's father would have been proud of his own son.

  "When the war is done, hopefully we will all be able to sit down like this again, and together we will plan for a better future, one where the Underworld is united. When the war is done, we will have a chance to make this a better world," Shade says and there are nods of agreement. Of course we all wish that we will make it through the war, but I sense that not all of us will make it through. Somehow we are not all going to be here when it is over and done with.

  "Well whatever happens this is our final moment; and it is a party, is it not? There should be music and dancing," Kayden says and he gets up to his feet and comes around the table. He holds out his hand for me to take as he bows half-way at the waist.

  "Would you like to dance Anna?" Kayden asks, I want to ask Victor for permission ask to see if this is okay, but I don't. Kayden is Victor's friend and although I know Kayden's real motives, it is only a dance. There is no harm dancing with my fiancé’s oath brother, and so I place my hand in Kayden's and allow him to lead me out onto the dance floor.

  There is no music, but Kayden sets a rhythm none the less. It is enchanting and fun being twirled around the dance floor, I can feel Victor watching us, and as I look over he smiles at us. I wonder what he is thinking in this moment, as he watches Kayden and I dance gracefully before him. Shade comes over and steals me out of Kayden's arms, his dance is faster paced, and we move around chaotically, causing a racket of a noise. Astoria and Augustus dance in a romantic fashion, and I watch as Augustus leans in to Astoria's ear and whispers sweet words of affection to her. I am pulled out of Shades arms by the man that I love, and I look up into Victor's eyes, there seems to be a dark fire burning within his eyes. I smile at him and he returns the motion, he pushes my hair away from my shoulder and kisses my neck. Our dance slows down quite rapidly until we are slowly swaying from side to side.

  "You look beautiful Anna, puffy eyes and all," Victor whispers in my ear before kissing my cheek.

  "Whatever happens during the battle, I will always be with you," Victor says and then leaning down ever so slightly, he kisses me gently on the lips. I am swept up into the kiss until it consumes me completely. It feels as if heaven and hell have come to an alliance as Victor continues to kiss me. We pull away as I need air, but I can barely breathe as I look up into his eyes. Something is off within them; something has changed in his behaviour though it appears as if nothing has changed at all. Was I only imagining the change within him? Was I only I imagining his wish to die? Or was it more real than I could begin to understand?

  Victor and I keep our connection, intertwined in each other's arms, mere millimetres apart as we stare into each other's eyes. The world has slipped away from us, and it is only the shaking of the ground that we stand upon that brings us down from heaven and back into reality.

  I look around to see if everyone is okay, and then when I see that they all are I make me way to the floor length windows. Outside we can see that there are enormous balls of fire being shot through the air towards the village below the castle.

  "Oh God," Is all that I can say. Hell seems to have been unleashed on the village, and I stare in horror as those present come to stand beside me.

  "The Skin-walkers have started their attack," Shade says, it is not a question, but a statement. It is obvious who would attack us; the very same people that we were meant to battle tomorrow.

  "Let us pray that no-one is harmed within the village; Let us pray that they will stay where it is safe," Astoria says and I can only agree with her. It would be horrible for the people of this kingdom to be harmed, but is there even a safe place for them to go?

  "Lord Baron,
go and awaken the soldiers, we must go and apprehend the attackers," Augustus says to the other older man beside him.

  "Shade and I will go with you," Kayden says to Lord Baron. Shade and Lord Baron go ahead without Kayden, who turns to me.

  We watch each other for a split second, and I am anxious and curious as to what he is going to do, what he is going to say, if he'd dare say too much in front of Victor. Instead he pulls me in for a quick hug, holding me so tightly that he may take a piece of me with him. "Stay safe and no matter what you do, stay within the castle," He says nothing more to me, and he pulls away before I can say a word to him.

  "Stay safe," I breathe so softly that no-one hears. Victor kisses my lips one last time, and I feel a tear slide down my cheek, for both of them. I don't know when I'm going to see them next, I don't know if I will ever get to see them again at all. All I know is that this may have been the last moment that I had with them, and it is nowhere near long enough.

  Chapter 24 – Battle Phantoms

  Anna's P.O.V

  There is no time to think of those last moments that I had just shared with Victor and Kayden. There is no time to think about how they were meant to march out into the battle in the morning, rather than in the dead of night. There is no time to spare a single thought on what could have been. All my time, all my attention, my focus needs to be here in the present, rather than pondering on all that could have been.