Fix My Fall

by Carey Heywood

  Glancing back at me, she folds her arms across her chest. “It’s been months. Months! You took the three date rule and times it by ten.”

  Zipping my suitcase closed, I shake my head. “Don’t get on my case just because you and Brent didn’t wait.”

  Her brows go up. “Heaven forbid I look out for my best friend and hope she gets some.”

  Glaring at her, I press my finger to my lips. She rolls her eyes.

  I motion to the chair on the other side of my bed. “Will you please grab that bag?”

  She picks it up and hefts the strap over her shoulder. “Lord, how much did you pack?”

  It’s spring in New Hampshire. I needed to pack for whatever weather we might run into at the cabin.

  “I wanted options.”

  Pulling my suitcase down, I extend the handle and head toward my door with Sam on my heels. Spencer and Brent are both on the sofa, talking. I only hope their conversation was loud enough to drown out anything Sam said.

  Both of them stand as we approach.

  Spencer skirts the sofa to claim my bag from Sam. “All set?”

  My cheeks flush and I suddenly feel shy. “Yes.”

  He opens the door and holds it for me.

  Standing in the doorway I look at Sam. “Thanks for watching Emo for me.”

  She grins. “Anytime. I hope you guys have a great weekend.”

  Thankfully she doesn’t say anything more suggestive than that.

  Spencer lifts his hand and gives them a subtle wave. “See you later.”

  As the door swings shut Sam shouts. “I slipped some condoms into the front pocket of that bag!”

  Click.

  Spencer and I lock eyes.

  “She what?”

  I gulp, then grab his arm and begin to pull him down the hall. “Ignore her.”

  It’s not until all of our bags are loaded, and we’re on the road that Spencer speaks. “I’m having a hard time ignoring her.”

  It’s a miracle I don’t swerve off the road. “Um.”

  “What exactly are your intentions with me this weekend Miss Thompson?”

  I can’t help it, I start laughing. When I glance over at him I’m relieved to see he’s cracking a smile.

  “Wouldn’t you like to know,” I tease.

  My nerves are still there but different now. Instead of being embarrassed about what Sam said, I’m grateful. She pointed out the elephant in the room and Spencer handled it like a champ.

  It’s a shame I didn’t have to tell her I didn’t need any protection. I already packed plenty of my own. Now, I’m not positive things are going to get physical this weekend. But, if one thing leads to another, I wouldn’t be opposed to it happening.

  “Do I need a safe word?”

  This time I do swerve.

  Quickly correcting myself, I stare straight ahead. “Come again? I’m not sure I heard you right.”

  What kinda stuff is he into?

  My nerves come flooding back.

  “I was attempting to be funny. Seeing how freaked you look, I think I failed miserably.”

  It was a joke? Thank God.

  I sag with relief. “You had me wondering if I’m in over my head for a second there.”

  “Poor attempt at humor. I promise it won’t happen again.”

  It’s crazy, but I think it’s sorta adorable how goofy he is. I’ve been out with smooth talkers before and couldn’t trust a word coming out of their mouths.

  With Spencer, I don’t have to worry about any of that and I like it.

  Looking over at him, I smile. “I think you’re great.”

  He reaches out, and rests his hand on my leg, his thumb brushing back and forth. For as much time as we spend in cars, this is the first time he’s ever done this. It’s so unexpectedly sexy, I have to stop myself from squirming in my seat.

  Focusing all of my attention on the road, I try to keep my cool. It doesn’t work. How a simple caress of his thumb could affect me so much is insane.

  He’s touching all of three inches of me. How is it that I feel it all over?

  My palms are damp, and they’re not the only part of me feeling that way. The back of my neck is flushed. Moving one hand from the steering wheel, I lower the temperature for the vents on my side of my car.

  His thumb continues to move back and forth, back and forth. “Are you hot?”

  Motioning to my sweater, I lie, “This sweater is really thick.”

  His thumb pauses for a couple beats before starting again. Thankfully, the turn for Asher’s driveway is just up the road.

  “We’re almost there.”

  “It was kind of your brother and his fiancée to let us stay in their cabin.”

  Talking about my family luckily dulls the effect his touch has on me. “I have a feeling it was Paige’s idea. She’s still getting used to living with a hermit. If she can’t bring him to company, I think she’s bringing company to him.”

  “Who needs people if you have a lake?”

  I flip on my turn signal. “Don’t let Asher hear you say that. It’ll only enable him.”

  “I promise not to say a word.”

  I turn onto his drive. “Good, because we’re here.”

  Taking the drive slower than normal, I watch Spencer’s reaction as we approach Asher and Paige’s cabin.

  Drifts of snow from the last storm we had line the end of the drive. A stark contrast to the sprinkling of green buds. Spring is trying to make her appearance but winter has yet to relinquish its hold.

  “Wow,” Spencer says once the cabins come into view.

  “Beautiful, isn’t it?”

  The first cabin is the largest of the three and where my brother and Paige live. The second cabin is Asher’s workshop. It is connected to the main cabin by a breezeway. The guest cabin is somewhat separated from the other two, giving everyone a bit of privacy.

  “We can unload and then walk up to the main cabin to say hi.”

  Ever since he started dating Paige, Asher no longer hides out in his workshop when company is around.

  It takes one trip to bring in our bags. “A year ago, there wasn’t a loft here.”

  Spencer’s hand glides over one of the wooden steps leading up to the bedroom loft area. “It blends in seamlessly, you’d think it was part of the original structure. Your brother really built all this?”

  Pride swells up within me. “He sure did.”

  “He’s got a nice setup here. I’m not sure I could live this far out though.”

  I know this land like the back of my hand, but I have to agree. “It’s the perfect place to visit but I’m with you. I like living in Woodlake.”

  “How much acreage do you think is the right amount?”

  My mouth twists to one side as I consider his question. “No more than three acres and no less than half an acre.”

  With every house I’ve shown him, or houses we’ve been to for a party, he asks my opinion about small details. My guess is it’s his way to show interest in what I do for a living. I only wish I understood his work enough to return the favor.

  We both turn at the sound of a knock on the door. “That must be the welcoming committee.”

  Crossing the room, I pull open the door. “Hey guys.”

  Asher and Paige stand on the doorstep. “Need any help unloading?”

  Giving each of them a hug, I answer, “We’ve brought in most of our stuff. I think Spencer’s telescope is the only thing still in the car.”

  Asher moves past me to shake hands with Spencer. “Need any help getting it set up?”

  “Abby told me you have a dock. Would it be alright to set up there?”

  “Sure. Want to walk down now and check it out first?”

  Spencer takes my hand. “What do you say, feel like walking down to the lake?”

  Popping up onto my tiptoes, I press a kiss to his cheek. “You two go ahead. I needed to talk to Paige about something.”

  His brows come together but befo
re he has a chance to say anything, Asher pats him on the back. “Sounds like we’ve been dismissed.”

  Thankfully, Spencer doesn’t seem bothered by this.

  As soon as the door closes behind them, Paige crosses her arms and looks at me. “What’s going on?”

  “Can I ask you some advice?”

  She moves past me and settles herself on the overstuffed sofa. “Of course you can.”

  I move to sit beside her and, at a loss for words; start fidgeting with the hem of my sweater.

  She squints at me. “You’re usually not one to beat around the bush. What’s going on?”

  Releasing the fabric, I turn more fully toward her. “I’m having second thoughts about Spencer.”

  Her mouth drops open in surprise but she recovers quickly. “I thought things were going great with you two. Did something happen?”

  “They have been, and this is going to sound crazy—”

  When I don’t say anything else she shakes my knee. “Hit me with it, I was an event planner in New York City. Trust me, I can handle crazy.”

  “Do you think he’s only with me for my looks?”

  She blinks, and then laughs.

  I frown. “I don’t see what’s so funny.”

  Pressing her hand to her chest, she quells her laughter. “Sorry, I wasn’t expecting that.”

  “Well?”

  Her eyes meet mine. “You’re gorgeous. You own a mirror so you don’t need me to tell you that but, no, I do not think Spencer is with you for your looks. Why would you even think that?”

  “He showed me where he works and there was this woman there. She said some things that implied I’m not as smart as they are and I can’t get the thought of it out of my head. I’m not a genius like him. It’s been a couple of weeks and whenever he’s at work I think about it. What if I’m holding him back?”

  “You warned me it was going to sound crazy. You know why? Because it is. Yes, he’s super smart. So what? His intelligence is not at the expense of yours. And, if I remember correctly, didn’t you graduate university with a ridiculously high GPA?”

  I shrug. “So?”

  “Alright, here’s the most important question; how does he make you feel?”

  I slump against the back of the cushions. “I like him, oh God I like him a lot. Being around him, even with all the mess I was dealing with for my house, makes me happy.”

  She gives me a confused look. “I’m not seeing a problem here. Why are you all stressed out about how smart you are?”

  “What if I like him too much? I didn’t ask for this, this relentless pressure in my mind. I wonder what he’s doing when we’re not together, and even when we are, I worry about what’s on his mind. What if I could somehow look inside and see his thoughts but not understand them. What then? There are times when he talks about what he’s working on and I have to nod and smile because I have no idea what any of it means.”

  She covers my hand with hers. “Babe, I don’t know the names of eighty percent of the tools Ash uses or the techniques of his trade. I nod and smile all the time. I don’t have to know all of the ins and outs of being a carpenter to support him. And, on the flip side, I’m positive he feels the same way about my event planning.”

  “That’s all good and fine but it’s not like he has any colleagues that make you feel like you have a low IQ.”

  She cocks her head to the side. “Tell me more about this woman.”

  My brows come together. “Like what?”

  She lifts her palms. “First off, was she wearing a wedding ring?”

  My thoughts take me back to that day and I try to remember if I noticed her wearing one. “I don’t think so.”

  She shakes her head. “Bet you she was jealous of you. Spencer has that whole hot professor thing going for him. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was into him and tried to make you feel insecure so you’d break up with him.”

  Annoyance powers through me as the truth to her words hits me. “How did I miss that?”

  Paige gives me a sympathetic smile. “You missed it because you’d never do something like that to another woman.”

  “What if he’d be better off with someone like her, someone who had more in common with him?”

  Paige rolls her eyes. “You’re overthinking this and if that were true, Asher and I wouldn’t be together. Besides, haven’t you ever heard the expression opposites attract? Not that I even think you guys are all that opposite.”

  “So are we opposites, or aren’t we?” I ask.

  She swats at my leg. “Nope, not even going there. The only thing that’s important right now is how you feel about Spencer. Nothing else matters.”

  I stand, and move toward the large picture window that overlooks the lake. “I know how I feel, it’s Spencer that I’m not sure about.”

  Both he and Asher stand at the end of the dock, the telescope on its tripod between them. It’ll be hours before it’s dark enough to do any stargazing. They’re talking and I wish I could somehow hear their conversation.

  “Okay, Spencer is a smart guy, that’s something we can both agree on, right?”

  She waits for me to nod before continuing. “And, he came here with you of his own free will?”

  I nod again.

  “And when he’s around you, he acts like your boyfriend?”

  Okay, I see where she’s going with this. “Yes.”

  She grins. “There’s your answer.”

  I frown. “What if he changes his mind?”

  Her smile falls. “There’re no guarantees in this world. You know that better than most people right now. You lost your home and last year I lost my company. It’s pointless to try and protect yourself from the what-ifs in life. Focus on the good stuff.”

  She’s right. “You’re right.”

  She shrugs and flips her golden blonde hair. “Are you going to stop stressing now?”

  I decide against telling her probably not. Thing is, I’m nervous. I lied earlier when I said I liked Spencer. Truth is, I think I’m falling in love with him. For some strange reason, I’d be less scared of him breaking my heart if I only liked him.

  I know that he’d never pressure me into doing anything I wasn’t ready for. When we go to sleep tonight, it will be the first time we have complete privacy since we started dating.

  Some of our make-out sessions have gotten pretty hot and heavy. Still, I’m not having sex with him in his parents’ basement or in Sam’s spare bedroom. Neither place has felt right. This cabin might be the most romantic place I’ve ever stayed. It feels like the right time to take things to the next level. Only I can’t stop wondering if I’m not right for him. Getting physical will only make it that much harder if things don’t work out.

  She comes to stand beside me. “I can see those wheels churning. Seriously, what is holding you back?”

  I tap my forehead on the cool glass of the window. “I don’t know. “

  “I have an idea. What if you talk to him about it? Maybe that will clear all of this up for you.”

  Turning my head, I meet her gaze. “Yeah, what should I say? Hey Spencer, I really want to have my way with you but first will you tell me if you think I’m smart enough for you or not?”

  She shakes her head. “Alright, let the intelligence stuff go or I’m going to sic your brother on you. No, what I would say if I was you, is, hey Spencer, I really like you and think you feel the same way about me. But, before we take this any further I wanted to be sure we’re both into each other.”

  “What if he doesn’t feel the same way?”

  Paige takes my hand and pulls me away from the window. “Look, either way, you need to know. I personally think he’s crazy about you but if you need to hear it from him so be it.”

  Sinking onto the cushions I press my temple. “Why do I have such trust issues?”

  “You’ve avoided dating forever. I think I know why. Who could measure up to your dad or your brothers? You’ve waited a long time to fall for
someone and you’re scared and rightfully so. Trusting someone with your heart is scary business.”

  My thoughts shift to the dock and Spencer. Not once has he ever given me a reason not to trust him. In fact, he’s been amazing since our first coffee date.

  Knowing the man he is today, I can’t help but wonder if we would have had a connection like this back in high school.

  Paige rests her chin on her palm. “What are you thinking?”

  Pulling in a deep breath, I smile. “I’ve been keeping Spencer at arm’s length out of some sort of need for self-preservation. The excuses I’ve given myself to worry about how he feels about me are just that, excuses.”

  “Does that mean you’re going to go for it?”

  My gaze moves back to the window and my smile shifts into a grin. “It does.”

  16

  Spencer

  Asher folds his arms over his chest. “Everything okay with Abby?”

  To be honest, her wanting to speak privately with Paige had surprised me. Now, with the way her brother is looking at me, I believe I have reason to be concerned. His stance is a not so subtle reminder that should I screw things up with Abby, I’ll have not only him, but Eli, Noah, and Gideon to worry about.

  “I believe so.”

  He’s easily got three inches on me and visions of him taking his fist to drive me through the wooden planks of the dock whack-a-mole style cross my mind. “Hmm.”

  His response isn’t reassuring.

  “Do you have the telescope all set up?”

  When I turn, I notice Asher has done the same, and watch as Abby and Paige make their way down the dock toward us.

  Motioning to it, I reply, “It is. Now all we have to do is wait for it to get dark.”

  Abby stops in front of me and wraps her arms around my waist. Instinctively, my arms drop to circle her.

  “Asher, want to help me with dinner?” Paige asks.

  He pauses to look at Abby and me before he answers her. “Sure.”

  They walk away hand in hand, Paige turning her head to wink at us before they’re out of sight.

  Abby presses her forehead to my chest and laughs.

  “What’s so funny?”

  Peering up at me, she tilts her head in the direction they went. “I love that my brother found Paige. She’s perfect for him.”