A few interminable minutes later she came out of her room with a look of sheer determination on her face. I had remained in the same spot she had left me in, so she came and sat down at the island.
“Can I get you some water?” I asked.
“Yes, thank you.” Thankful to have something to do, I grabbed a bottle from the refrigerator and brought it back over to her. As she took the bottle from me she stated, “I’m pregnant.” Her tone was very business-like which threw me off for a minute.
“Ok.” I said starring at her, examining her face. What reaction did she want from me? What reaction was she having?
I saw her take a deep breath and square her shoulders before she looked up at me again, “Listen, I know neither of us was expecting this. I didn’t think about birth control at all, I’m sorry. I haven’t had very many sexual relationships and…”
“I’m not mad.” I interrupted.
“What?”
“It’s just that I feel like you are trying to justify yourself or something. I mean, I’ve got to be honest with you, I don’t know how you want me to react right now. And while I’m pretty shocked by it, I’m not upset. I hope you let me be here with you through it all.” Her immediate silence did nothing to make me feel better, but I refused to say any more, so I waited.
Finally, she asked, “So what do you want to do about it?” Her eyes were questioning and though I heard what she asked, I felt like she was asking something else entirely.
“Well, I think first we have to figure out a few other things, but as soon as possible I’d like to go with you to the doctor. It would make me feel better to know you are ok, and for them to check you over. I mean, you have to be only a few days pregnant at this point, right? So I guess so far things should be normal, right?”
She smiled brilliantly at me, “Yea I think so.”
“So, we can just figure this out together, ok? One step at a time?”
“Yes, I would really love that.”
“I love you.” I blurted out, not knowing what other words would express all I felt welling within me.
“I love you, too, James!” She said as she brought her hands up to pull my lips towards hers.
Chapter 16
We sat for the next few hours and tried to figure out what we would do. I had wanted to tell her everything from my meeting with Tommy, but then something stopped me. She had told me so much of her life with her father. I knew she had seen and heard too much, but most of all, she bore the guilt of that knowledge. Did she really need to know that her father had killed my parents? It certainly would not make her life any easier. Since our adventure together had started she had been through so much. The fear and uncertainty of being kidnapped then having to adjust to working from someplace else, coupled with the added complication of our intimate relationship and now her pregnancy. Did she really need to know that her father was the man I was supposed to seek vengeance from? The back and forth conversation seemed to last the entire day. It was dark out before we realized we had not bothered to eat. I stepped into the kitchen to whip us something to eat and continued to think about whether to tell her or not. I thought about my parents. They never hid things from each other. Though this would be yet another blow for her to take, I knew in my gut she would want the truth. So, I resolved to her. When we sat for dinner I started, “I left out something from my meeting yesterday.”
“Oh, why?” She asked as she lifted the fork up to her lips.
“Honestly, I thought you had enough on your plate to process already. Though, on further thought I don’t think you would want me keeping this from you.”
“Whatever it is, I would want you to tell me. I can handle a lot more than you may think.”
“I know you can. I know how strong you are and how strong you’ve had to be. I just did not want to burden you with more.”
“It’s not a burden. If we are going to really try to share our lives, then we cannot keep things from each other.”
“Your father was the one who killed my parents.”
In an instant her face changed. Fear came over her quickly as she dropped the fork and looked as if she were about to run from me. She looked weary her eyes darting from my face to the door, to my face, to the hallway. I realized she was trying to figure out if my need to avenge my families honor was going to take over after all.
I reached out and covered her hand with mine gently, “My parents would not want me chasing after your father, I realize that now. I didn’t for many years. For the last 14 years I have done nothing but cultivate skill designed to extract pain on someone who had pained me. I cannot do that anymore. You changed that in me. You are more important to me than revenge.”
I saw the tears well up in her eyes as she said, “I am so sorry my family caused you such pain. I cannot imagine what you lived through, and what you have had to adjust to.”
“I would not want you to ever know that pain. I could never be the one responsible for causing you that kind of agony.” The tears spilled down her cheeks rolling gently. I reached up and wiped at them lightly.
“You’re right. It is a little overwhelming to have all of this information. I’m still glad and grateful that you told me. Maybe we can just stop trying to figure this all out for a few hours. Lose ourselves in a movie or something? I really just need to shut it all down right now.”
“Absolutely. Think you can manage finishing dinner?”
“Oh yes,” she smiled through her tear stained cheeks, “I’m starving.”
She sat back down and I did my best to chatter about mundane things. We talked about fall foliage, and growing food. It was a funny conversation for two people who lived in the city, but it was refreshing to find out that yet again we were of like mind in things. City life, as much as we enjoyed ourselves, was something we would both easily vacate to live in the woods.
Chapter 17
Over the next few days we came to the agreement that we would both set about preparing to relocate our lives. It was easy enough to hire moving companies who would go in and pack everything up. We both could easily continue to run our businesses from anywhere. I paid my managers well, and trusted them with the store as they had both been there a long time. She could let her clients know she was relocating and do virtual meetings instead of in person. For the time, we would stay here in the cabin until we figured out the next move. I had no idea what The Boss was going to do. Very likely, he would send someone after both of us. We debated heavily calling her father to fill him in, but the thought filled me with such anger I found I was unable to entertain it at all. I left that end up to her. In the long run, though, she decided to wait to see what my boss was going to do. She kept saying that maybe he would drop it all, that somehow it would all be alright. I appreciated her optimism, but I wasn’t as inclined to believe that was how things would go. The only thing I was completely sure of was that I loved her, would do anything for her. I was going to keep her safe or die trying.
A few days later, I got the text I knew was coming. Meeting tomorrow for breakfast with The Boss. I broke it to Guliana and as usual, she took it remarkably well. I admired that she didn’t break into hysterics at these tense moments. We spent that night making love and trying to only focus on the positive aspects of our future. I could not help but feel like we were fooling ourselves, but I could not bring myself to tell her that as she smiled while she spoke of baby room themes.
I kissed her goodbye deeply before I left. I pulled out of the garage to a heavily fog laden woodland paradise. I had always loved this cabin, this land. It did not matter how often I came here, I still was in awe at the sights that greeted me.
Leaving her had been a test of sheer will power. She had everything she could possibly need She knew where the cash was, the keys to the spare car. The house was stacked with food, and I had given her a general idea of where the house was located. She knew where the weapons were.
It was all I could do to keep her safe. It was anyone’s guess if
I would return from this meeting intact, but I was going to try like hell to keep my life. My life meant she was protected. The thought of her and our little one in danger like this burned through me.
Chapter 18
I was wearing as much heat as I could comfortably conceal. They were there first this time, I realized as I spotted their car in the parking lot. Queens was never a good meeting location. It was too easily accessible to too many roadways. Quick getaways were easy and there were a lot of places to dump a body. I had chosen to wear jeans instead of my usual suit. I was not of the mind to care at the moment. We greeted the same as we always had, nothing unusual. I was halfway through with my eggs when The Boss asked me what I intended to do.
I was thrown by the question, “What do you mean?”
“Do you intend to follow through with the hit? Abort it completely?”
“I will not do it.” I said, my voice like steel as I met his gaze.
“And your families honor? Your revenge” He asked softy. There was an odd absence of anger in his voice. I was not sure if this was good or bad sign. As long as I had known him he hadn’t been one to hide when he was pissed.
“I’m not there anymore.” Finality was evident in my voice.
“I see. So you’re willing to forego your vengeance with no hard feelings on either side?”
“What do you mean either side?” Confusion washed over me, there had only ever been one side.
“If you forego your attack on her father, will you then turn you anger toward my family?”
“What? No, why would I do that?” Yet even as I said it I understood. It had been my Uncle’s failures that had gotten my parents killed. I had turned my anger on the man that had actually killed my parents, it had never occurred to me to turn that anger on the family who my Uncle had pledged his loyalties, and whom have very likely been party to his wrongdoing. The Boss had sat quietly just looking at me, not answering my question. I continued, “Honestly, that never occurred to me. Chalk it up to my youth. I missed that side completely. But no. I would never come after you, or our family.”
“We only ever ordered this to assuage you. We felt we owed you for what happened to your family. It’s not a personal issue with the family. We are willing to rescind the hit altogether and wash our hands of this whole mess.” For a small minute I sat stunned. They had done this all for me, as a way of assuaging their own guilt over the death of my parents. Why had I never seen this angle before?
We ate on in silence for a few minutes before I broached, “We part this meeting as friends and in amicable accord?” He knew what I was asking. I wanted to know if I had to watch my back, or more importantly, Guliana’s.
“There is nothing between us but love and good faith all around.” The Boss stated raising his coffee mug with a slight incline to me. I raised mine likewise, and the meal finished in good accord.
Back in the car I could not believe that I had spent weeks living with gut wrenching fear for Guliana and myself only to find out that my own need for revenge had caused it all. I really was confounded by it all. If I had just been able to focus on the right things when they had passed I would have spent years of my life differently. Then again, I probably never would have met Guliana.
The drive back to the cabin went quickly as my mind raced with the possibility of our future together. I knew someday I would have to face her father. That anger was something I was going to have to work on for our future. Having Guliana by my side, I knew I could overcome it. In the short time I had known her she had turned my life upside down. All of the negative energy that I had surrounded myself in was gone. She had filled me with hope for a future. She was giving me the gift of a child. She was asking for nothing but my love. I could not wait to give that to her each and every day hereafter. For the first time in years my future looked bright without the taint of revenge. It was a new start for me, for us both. Guliana was my whole world now and we were safe.
MAFIA ROMANCE: The Hitmans Obsession: Bad Boy Alpha Male Mafia Pregnancy Romance (Contemporary Crime Thriller & Suspense Romance) Page 4
