He stands stunned as he reads my hostile expression.
“She could probably run a mile in her boots on the beach without breaking a sweat. She’s pure country, and I’m positive that won’t ever change. She’s a pessimist with an optimistic heart, and I am falling madly in love with her.”
I study his profile as it changes from shock to remorse.
“She’s my favorite person in the world, and I can’t imagine not knowing her. I can’t imagine having the chance to know her and throwing it away.”
I take an aggressive step forward and catch his eager gaze. He clearly wants more but is too much of a coward to ask.
“She’s going to graduate soon, and I’m going to do my damnedest to be the man in her life. You don’t deserve to know any of this. But you deserve to regret your decision.”
“So, she’s—”
“Better off.” I pull his card from my pocket, rip it in half and toss in on the sidewalk between us. “Sorry, Jim. I’m just not your kind of Grand Man.”
I retreat back to the party and shut the door behind me. I expect to be met with the hostile eyes of my parents; instead, I’m met with three pairs of surprised eyes.
“This is you?” Courtney says lifting her phone. “Fifty-six thousand followers? Are you fucking serious?”
Brenna snatches the phone away from her. “I can’t believe this is you, you’re famous!”
I snort. “We are not famous.”
She walks up to me and shoves the phone in my face. “Fifty-six thousand people are watching your every move, Theo.”
I shrug. “It’s just a school project for Laney.”
“A school project that’s got the two of you trending as the couple to watch in 2019.”
I try to ignore the small swell of pride I feel for her, for us. For what started out as a friendship and has turned into the most amazing thing to happen to me.
“Seriously, Theo?” Jamie asks with a little hurt in her voice. “Why would you keep this from us?”
“I think that’s obvious,” I take a step back as they circle me like vultures.
“Well, you’re screwed now, little brother. We’re definitely coming for a visit.
“Bet it up, punk, she’s our new best friend.”
“I still can’t believe this is you, boy sperm.”
Grannism—Not all men are created equal. Half of them were created due to God’s sense of humor.
Laney
It’s my first ever White Christmas, and some part of me believes the credit belongs to Gran. The view of the trees from the porch is spectacular. Mom and I bundle up under the blanket on the wicker couch sipping hot cocoa mixed with coffee while watching the snow fall.
It’s more ice than snow at this point, but equally as beautiful. Before I was serving coffee to the masses, gathering on the porch for morning coffee was Mom, Gran’s, and my routine. Then Mom took a second shift, Gran got sick, I got the barista job, and our routine changed. It had to. I didn’t like it. None of us did. There are times in your life where change is welcome, but this isn’t one of them. Because for the first time in months, I’m completely at peace sitting next to my mother.
“Wow,” she says, admiring our view. Stretching out a newly unwrapped off-brand Ugg, I appreciate my own view. She places a hand on my candy cane covered thigh.
“You like them?”
“I love them so much. Thank you, Santa.” I kiss her cheek.
“You know your Gran would always stand guard while I put all your stuff together. If you so much as moved in your sleep, she would come running down the hall demanding I pack up and wait. As soon as I did, we’d peek in to see you were fast asleep. Drove me insane, but she did not want you to find out about Santa.”
I grin. “Sounds like her.”
“She said not to ever ruin a kid’s magic. There’s not enough of it in the world anymore.”
“I agree.”
“But I think this is pretty magical.”
“I was thinking it could be her.”
Mom’s lips quiver. “Maybe it is.”
“I think it is, Momma,” I take her hand in mine and squeeze it.
Mom lifts a tear from beneath her eyes and nods. “Let’s not cry. Let’s smile for her today.”
“Yeah. I’m with you.”
“So, you seem happy these days.”
“I am.”
She smiles and bumps shoulders with me.
“And Theo?”
“I’m pretty sure he is too.”
“Are you safe?”
“I’ve been on birth control since I was sixteen.”
“I know but—”
“But nothing.” I quirk a brow. “When is the last time you had sex?”
“I’m serious, Laney.”
“So am I.”
“Discussion over,” my mother says, and we clink coffee mugs. A few sips later, we hear the crunch of snow.
“You expecting anyone?” Mom asks me.
“No. You?”
“Uh uh. But I have a feeling.”
“Theo’s in Houston.”
“Sure, he is.” She kisses my hair and then stands before gathering our empty mugs. “When he pulls up, invite him in. I bought him some cologne.” I wince because I know it’s cheap, and probably not anything he’d wear. We can’t afford much, and I’m hoping he’s a good sport about it. I’m already worried enough about my present. Rattling with anticipation, I look toward the road and smile when Mom’s suspicions are confirmed, and his Honda comes into view.
It’s unexpected and amazing as butterflies swarm around me, and I prepare my lips for the perfect Christmas kiss.
But when I see the speed at which he’s traveling, alarms go off.
“Uh, Mom, he’s coming in hot.”
Just as I say it, Theo slams on his brakes, his car sliding over the ice a few feet before it fishtails and stops. Theo gets out of the car looking like he’s just been electrocuted while shouting at the top of his lungs. “Great, you’re awake! Of course you’re awake!” He says, waving a hand of crazy into the air. “You should know I left at three a.m.! Three a.m. to take a two-hour drive to get to you before you woke up!”
“Mom.”
“Yes, baby?”
“Pour some bourbon in Theo’s coffee,” I whisper-shout over my shoulder.
“Already on it,” she says through a laugh as Theo continues his rant. “Do you have any idea what happens to Texans who get out on icy roads at three in the morning!?” He juts his chin out and cups his ear with his hand.
I slowly shake my head, my hands behind my back.
He rips at his hair before spreading the loose strands into the wind in front of him. “Jesus must have been celebrating his birthday really big last night because he sure as hell didn’t take the wheel the two thousand times I screamed his name!”
My mother’s laugh rings out behind me as I try my best not to do the same while he’s in this state. I’m biting my lips so hard tears spring to my eyes.
“I-i-it was rough, huh?”
He cocks his head, his eyes bulging as if it’s the dumbest question I could ask before opening his back-passenger door and carefully stacking presents in his arms. “Leave it to life to let me know that attempting to do something romantic for my girl is a foolish notion.” He slaps the door closed; his arms full as he looks up to me exasperated. “So, I sure as hell hope you appreciate these blood-stained pre—”
Those are the last words he speaks before the rubbery soles of his Converse connect with a slick patch of ice.
“Oh shit, Mom! Man down! Man down!” She collapses behind me in the kitchen in hysterics.
Theo sleeps peacefully sprawled on my mattress, one foot hanging off, and I gaze on at him, watching his chest rise and fall. After breakfast, Theo and my mother exchanged presents. He’d put the cologne on the minute he opened the box, earning a bigger piece of me. And she’d thanked him profusely for the fancy cashmere scarf he’d picked, which suited
her. But as soon as he drank his coffee and his breakfast started to digest, he could barely keep his eyes open, so I put him to bed. My bed. Where he rests now. With the day half gone, I decide to rouse him with a kiss to his cheek. “Merry Christmas.” He groans and then reaches for me. “What time is it?”
“Six p.m.”
That jars him. “Really?”
“It’s okay. It’s been a good day. You needed the sleep.”
He pulls me to lay with him, and I snuggle close in his arms. It takes a few more minutes for him to come to.
“I don’t think I’ve ever heard my mother laugh that hard in my entire life,” I say with a giggle. “I’m sorry you busted your ass, but I have to say that was awesome.”
“My ass disagrees,” he says, tilting my face up and pressing a kiss to my lips.
“You are a hot mess, Houseman.”
“That was the scariest drive of my life.”
“I’m sorry.”
He brushes the hair from my shoulder. “I’m glad I did it.”
“Me too. When you wake up, I have something for you.”
He moves to sit and runs a thumb down my cheek. “You didn’t have to.”
“Don’t thank me yet.”
“Oh shit.”
“Don’t say that yet either.” I pull my laptop from my bag and open it in his lap.
“What’s this?”
“Well, this is my laptop.”
“Uh huh.”
I click a few buttons and pull up the page. “And this is your new website.”
“What?”
“Okay, don’t panic, it’s nothing I can’t undo,” I explain quickly. “Before you get mad, I got all the stuff off your drive, organized your music a little bit for both your app and the new site so you can globally start marketing whenever you feel comfortable. I also had a friend design your logo, and we can change the name if you don’t like it, but I started a social page on every single platform including the two most used for this kind of application.”
Theo’s eyes roam the page as I try my best to weigh his expression.
“Okay, so when you’re ready, all you have to do is click here.” I show him where to publish the page. “And then post on the social platforms I set up in the folder, here, at your leisure. Some social presence is better than none, and I can run your pages for you, uploading samples of the music if you want. I figure you can double, if not triple your income by expanding your market overseas. If Honda is using your music here, Honda can use it elsewhere. I’ve drafted up an international rights license, and it’s in this folder here. I also gathered a price list from other apps and created a comparable table.”
Theo’s silence terrifies me as he fingers the keypad and scrolls through the online library. “So, everything available here is available on your app but disappears from the site when purchased.”
“Jesus, Laney.”
“If you’re mad, I can change everything back lickety-split. Seriously, I won’t be upset.”
He turns to me with such…pride in his eyes that mine water.
“You like it then?”
He grips my face in his hands and presses the gentlest of kisses to my lips. “This is incredible.”
“You really like it?” I ask, searching his eyes.
“It’s fucking incredible. You’re incredible. I love it. I haven’t had time to do this. H-h-ow have you?”
“I’ve been working on it for a while.”
“How long?”
“A while. I bled a little for your present too,” I wrinkle my nose before he takes my mouth and delivers an intoxicating kiss. When he pulls away, we just stare.
“I may need to rethink my gift.”
“Don’t be silly. I want what you thought I’d want.”
He shakes his head and kisses me again. The look he’s giving me is more than enough. Theo disappears briefly retrieving my gift from under the tree and hauling a beautifully wrapped box into my room. It’s slender and stands about five-foot tall, and I can’t for the life of me guess what’s in it. I rip at the paper anxiously and step back when I’ve done enough damage to see what it is. Heart alight, I’m at a loss for words.
“It’s the best two-sleeper tent out there. It’s supposed to be so comfortable it’ll seem more like glamping.”
“Let’s do it,” I blurt, my eyes shining.
He nods toward the window. “Weather isn’t really up to par.”
“No, in here. Let’s set it up right now!” I rip at the top of the box excitedly pulling the smelly new vinyl out as Theo chuckles. “Alright then, let’s do it.”
Staring up at the ceiling of the tent, I lay in Theo’s arms as the soft light of the electric lantern he bought creates a candlelight hue in the space.
“This must have cost you a fortune.”
“Don’t think about that.”
“Can you imagine how many stars we’ll be able to see with all these skylights?”
“It’s going to be awesome.”
“Theo, remember how I told you I didn’t camp anymore because I was scared it wouldn’t be as magical.”
“I do.”
“That’s no longer true,” I say, sitting up to stare down at him. His hands are clasped behind his head. “You, sir, have single-handedly brought magic back into my life.”
He lifts one of his shoulders. “I’m good like that.”
“And you need some humble pie.” I roll my eyes and playfully slap his chest. “But I mean it. I really do. This is the best present anyone has ever given me.”
Pulling me down by my neck, he kisses me soundly on the lips.
“I’m glad you like it.”
“I love it,” I whisper, looking around our new fortress.
The corner of his mouth lifts. “Then I’m glad you love it.”
I grin down at him.
“Merry Christmas, Theo.”
“Merry Christmas, Laney.”
#bestfriends #campinginthebedroom #bestpresentever #nogummiesthankyouverymuch #whoneedsmistletoe #hebroughtmagic #bestchristmasever #livingourrealestlife
Grannism—You should always return Tupperware. It’s sentimental for some.
Theo
“You aren’t doing it right!”
“I’ve been manning this grill for years, back off,” Laney says, snapping tongs at Devin. Chase chuckles as he steps outside, the porch door slapping shut behind him.
“They’re at it again, huh?”
I grin on at Laney bundled up in a sweater, leggings, and a beanie, and briefly imagine unwrapping her later.
“I know that look,” Chase hands me a beer, just as Laney swats Devin away closing the grill.
“Baby, tell this bubble-butted idiot that she has to—”
“Nope,” Chase shouts from the porch. “Hell no, the last time I got in the middle of a heated discussion between you two, I barely made it out alive.”
Devin huffs from where she stands. “Why did I marry you again?”
“Because I’m ridiculous hot, and I put up with your shit.”
Devin smiles. “That’ll do for now.”
The four of us spent a quiet New Year’s Eve at my abandoned house popping champagne and decided to spend the day with Deidra and Max. Laney insisted we barbecue in the freezing temperatures and no one thought to argue. The only argument that ensued was when Chase and I offered to grill, and were read the riot act from the two women currently fighting over it.
“They are something,” Chase remarks fondly as they bicker back and forth. “Word of advice. Just go with it.”
“When?”
“Every day. Every. Single. Day.”
“Stop it!” Laney shrieks swatting at Devin’s hands.
“They’re currently on the same menstrual cycle,” Chase says. “Please don’t ask me how I know that. And if you don’t want me privy to something, don’t share it with Laney.”
“It’s like that, huh?” I say, watching them go at it.
“So
very like that. They don’t keep shit from each other. And they can rag on each other all damn day, but if you go after either one of them alone, they’ll attack like a pack of piranhas.”
“Hey Theo, have you found Laney’s pause button?” Devin calls to me where I sit on the porch.
Laney whips her head around with a “don’t you dare!” just as Devin’s arm shoots out and she presses her fingers into the indent at Laney’s collar.
Laney immediately shuts down, dropping the tongs, her entire body jerking before she goes limp while something like a snort comes out of her.
Devin grins wickedly. “Emergency shut down button. She’s so ticklish when you press here that she can’t fight you, but you have to press hard, see?” Devin explains as Laney speaks like the Tin Man with rusty lips.
“I’b gonna kib you!”
Devin wiggles her fingers digging them in and Laney explodes in laughter.
“See, you take it away, and you get a two-second delay before she can move again,” Devin demonstrates, pulling her fingers away briefly right before she paralyzes her again. “I figure this will come in handy for you one day.”
Laney is drooling a little at this point, spittle coming from her lips. “St-t-t-hap!”
Devin does it once more as tears pour down Laney’s tomato-colored face when the screen door again slaps closed behind me.
“Devin, she’s going to kill you,” Deidra says through a laugh.
“She’ll have to catch me first,” Devin pulls her fingers away barely dodging Laney’s first swing before she darts away with Laney charging after her.
Chase and I are hysterical as we watch the two of them run down the drive like twin female Forrest Gumps.
“You bitch! You swore you wouldn’t ever tell anybody!” Laney shrieks, digging into the gravel in her boots making good time.
“Language, Elaine!” Deidra scolds.
“You’re going to die, clown!” Laney declares doing an impressive leap through the trees before they disappear out of sight.
Deidra sighs. “They make me so proud. Tomboys, both of them. It’s a miracle they survived this long. Come on, boys, I’ll make your first plate.”
The Underdogs: The Complete Series Page 21
