Raquel's Abel

by Leigh Barbour

  “No, the issue isn’t money. I just need to think about it, talk it over with…”

  Her eyes narrowed. “I must be mistaken. I understood you were the sole owner of the property.”

  “I am, but well, there are other interested parties.” I couldn’t just go and sell this place without talking to Abel or Regina or Grandmother.

  “I understand.” She crammed the papers back in her briefcase. “We will be in touch with you over the next few days.”

  I nodded.

  “Don’t worry.” She stood up abruptly. “I know my way out.” I heard her angry heels march across the foyer then heard the front door close.

  Could I really just get rid of the only home I’d ever known so easily? Just by signing my name? I was so confused.

  I hurried into the foyer, hoping I’d see Abel, but he was nowhere to be found.

  Chapter Sixteen

  I sat in the living room alone, thinking about Abel. I knew he was hurting, but he was obviously avoiding me. I could hardly blame him after the way I’d acted toward him.

  Grandmother appeared in the doorway.

  “Good morning. Where’s Maria Elena?” I said.

  “I was feeling so well, I decided to come downstairs without her.” She adeptly grabbed the chrome wheels of her wheelchair and came toward me. She cocked her head. “What has gotten that Abel Rollins in such a state? He looks like he’s bitten into something rancid.”

  I looked down at the floor.

  “You don’t look any better. Whatever it is, you just need to say you’re sorry. Even if you were right, my dear.”

  “Grandmother, what would you say if I sold this place?”

  “Sold this place?” She looked around the room. “My father-in-law built this place and dreamed of it being in the family forever.”

  I felt even worse. “Abel thinks it should be turned into an orphanage.”

  “An orphanage,” she repeated. “What a lovely idea. That’s certainly better than the Communists taking this place over. That’s what happened to Father’s palaces, you know.”

  How could my grandmother make so much sense one minute and then be so crazy the next?

  “This old house does need children, lots of them. I wanted to have more children, but I wasn’t blessed with more, just your father.” She smiled and looked down at her hands as if remembering holding him.

  “I want children, too,” I said more to myself than to Grandmother.

  “You are lucky, Raquel. You have true love, not like Regina who, in spite of all her beaus, still doesn’t know the meaning of love.”

  “I think Regina will be fine, Grandmother.”

  Her old eyes looked right at me. “I certainly hope my youngest granddaughter can overcome her father’s mistreatment.”

  “I think she’s about to turn over a new leaf.”

  “Raquel, my dear, I must tell you something.” She leaned forward in the wheelchair.

  If she mentioned something about the Romanov jewels, I thought I’d break down and cry.

  “I sense that I won’t be with you very long, and I want you to do something for me.”

  “Grandmother, Dr. Blake says you are perfectly fine.” He’d come over just a few days ago and said her heart was strong.

  “Doctors don’t know everything. That’s why my mother counted on her Rasputin.”

  “Well, Dr. Blake says you’re fine.”

  “When I go, Raquel, I would like you to scatter my ashes over the Moscva River.”

  “The what river?”

  “The Moscva, dear. It runs right by the place I was born.”

  I rolled my eyes.

  “Please, dear, I insist you agree with my wishes.” She kneaded her hands together as if she didn’t trust me.

  “Grandmother, you know very well you are to be buried beside Grandfather in the vault where all of the other Blankenships are buried.”

  “No, no, your grandfather understood and respected my wishes.”

  I didn’t like lying to her, but I guess I would since she was suffering from dementia. “Sure, Grandmother, I will honor your wishes.” I wonder if she even realized how far Moscow was from Virginia.

  She let out a sigh of relief.

  “I was never able to govern my subjects due to those crazy people who took over, but at least I can be a part of Russia when I die.”

  “Rest assured, Grandmother, I will make sure you are buried in the country you were born in.” There, I wasn’t actually lying to her. She’d be buried right here in Virginia where she was really born.

  Luckily Maria Elena appeared in the doorway. “Good morning,” she said. “Come with me,” she said to my grandmother. “Let’s go get some breakfast.”

  I watched her wheel Grandmother toward the kitchen.

  I closed my eyes and thought of my mounting money problems. I hadn’t signed the papers because I wasn’t sure. I had to be realistic, though. Money wasn’t going to fall out of the sky.

  “Hello,” said a deep voice.

  I opened my eyes to see Abel. His shape wasn’t very clear, but I saw that he was wearing his World War I uniform again. “It’s so good to see you,” I said guiltily.

  Even though his features were hazy, I could see the hurt in his eyes and the way his face looked pinched in frustration.

  “I see that you are considering selling the house to that la-dee-dah school.”

  I hung my head. “It isn’t what I want, but I don’t see any way out of this predicament.”

  He opened his mouth to protest, but Maria Elena appeared again the doorway. “Señorita, your grandmother, I think she’s…”

  “She was fine when she was in here,” I said, then remembered what she’d said. “Oh my God.” My heart beat painfully in my stomach. I ran past Abel and into the dining room.

  Grandmother was leaned over in her chair looking incredibly peaceful.

  “Grandmother,” I said in a low gentle tone.

  She didn’t respond.

  “Oh no, Señorita, she dead,” Maria Elena sobbed.

  “What happened?” I looked at Maria Elena.

  “Nothing, I talking to her and her head fall to the side. She no say nothing.”

  I sandwiched Grandmother’s hand between mine. “Grandmother, wake up.” Her cheeks were without color and her hand cool.

  My senses swam with confusion and grief. I felt the earth attempt to swallow me.

  “Don’t falling.” Maria Elena shoved a chair beneath me.

  I fell into it. “You need to call…”

  “I make the phone calls, you no worrying.” She ran out of the room.

  I straightened my grandmother’s hair, remembering how particular she used to be about her clothing and how she used to go to the beauty parlor once a week before she was wheelchair bound. “You knew this morning that today was the day,” I hadn’t paid much attention to what she said.

  “It was her time,” Abel’s voice swept into the room.

  I looked up to see a haze that quickly materialized on the other side of the dining table.

  “Did she go for the light?” I asked calmly.

  Abel nodded, his haze swirling around him.

  “Was anyone waiting for her?”

  “They were all there,” he answered in a consoling tone.

  I envied Abel that he’d seen everyone I missed so much.

  “Your grandmother loved you.”

  “I knew she was old and I knew she was going to die sometime, but I wasn’t ready.” All I could think of was how I was irritated at her this morning. I should have been nicer. I believed I had so much more time with her.

  “I don’t think we’re ever ready to say goodbye to someone for the last time.” Abel put his hand on the back of one of the dining room chairs.

  I looked down at her hand that I still had clasped in mine. “Grandmother was worried I was throwing away true love.” Sheepishly I raised my eyes to look at Abel’s.

  “She was a wise lady.” I
thought I saw his cloudiness take on a little more form.

  I laid Grandmother’s hand down on her lap the way she used to let them rest. She was always such a lady. I should be more like her. “Abel, the reason I ran away…”

  “Yes.” He stepped closer to the table.

  “I left you standing there because I suddenly realized, just at that instant, how much I wanted children.”

  “Oh.” His head bowed then he raised his eyes. “And you thought that because I’m an apparition, I couldn’t give you children.”

  I trembled inside, hoping he could forgive me for my terrible behavior.

  Surprisingly, I saw his expression emanate understanding rather than recrimination.

  Maria Elena walked in the room, her eyes red from crying. “They’re here, Señorita.”

  Behind her, EMTs marched toward us carrying their medical kits toward us. One of them shooed me out of the way. I stood there stubbornly, not wanting to leave her side, then I realized how absurd that was and walked into the kitchen, making sure I could still see what was going on.

  Abel seemed to have disappeared, but Maria Elena wept beside me.

  “Don’t worry. You can stay in this house as long as I’m here.”

  “I miss her already. She was my family.”

  I wrapped my arms around her. Her usually caramel skin was pale and she trembled from her sobbed. “You made her last few years a joy. She so appreciated your company, Maria Elena.”

  “She made me feel wanted, something I hadn’t since my father threw me out.” With the back of her hand, she wiped her wet cheeks.

  “At least they’re alive. I’ve lost everyone in my family except Regina.” That reminded me. I had to call her. How would she take the news? In spite of the fact she and my father never got along, she’d been devastated when he’d passed away.

  Chapter Seventeen

  “One of the last things she said to me was about you,” I said as we got into the limousine.

  Regina’s eyes were filled with tears. “Really?” She looked at me as if I were making it up.

  “Yes. She said,” I faltered. “Grandmother said she wondered if you’d ever get over Daddy’s mistreatment of you.”

  “She cared!” Her eyes cleared and she looked at me. “Grandmother did care. She actually noticed Daddy didn’t treat me right.” Her voice turned high and thin.

  “Of course she noticed. Everyone noticed.” I hung my head. How could my father have blamed a baby for my mother’s suicide?

  “And now she’s gone.” She brought her hands up to her cheeks. “It’s just you and me.” She sounded like a child.

  I nodded, feeling as forlorn as Regina did. “Everybody’s gone but you and me.” I looked down at the urn that contained Grandmother’s ashes. I stroked its shiny brass sides.

  The limo passed the pillars at the entrance to the cemetery and started down the gravel road to the Blankenship mausoleum. Soon we crested the hill and could see the columned granite structure that housed every Blankenship except Regina, Grandmother, and me.

  Regina laid her hand on my thigh. “Can you forgive me for wanting to put Grandmother into a home?”

  I curled my mouth to let her know that was a silly question. “There was nothing to forgive.”

  The driver stopped and I opened the door before he could open it for me. I handed him the key for the mausoleum. We waited until he had opened the door and turned on the light.

  I walked past Daddy’s vault. Next to Granddaddy’s spot, Grandmother’s name was written out in very English looking letters: Mary Margaret Minor Blankenship April 21, 1926—. Soon the end date would be engraved there. I set the urn in her spot. I felt a smile crawl across my face as I realized they were finally together.

  She had said they were truly in love. That made me wonder. Did Abel still want to marry me? If I were him, I’d certainly have doubts about a woman that just ran away while I was down on one knee. I hadn’t even looked back.

  Regina reached up and straightened Grandmother’s urn in the vault so that the little wings on the sides were straight with the line of the wall. “I’m going to miss her.”

  I thought about poor Maria Elena. She was so upset, she hadn’t been able to pull herself together to come to the cemetery. “No, Señorita,” she’d said. “I crying too much.”

  I’d tried to persuade her to come any way, but she’d insisted.

  I put my arm around Regina. “Let’s go.”

  The driver dropped Regina off at her house.

  As she walked up the walkway, I called, “Come over soon and tell me how your classes are going?”

  She waved at me with a smile and kept on going. I could tell by the sureness in her step that things were going to be all right with her.

  When I got home, Maria Elena was standing in the foyer looking like she was glad to see me. “I sorry I no go with you.”

  “That’s all right. I’ll take you over to the mausoleum any time you want to go.”

  She wasn’t crying, but I could by the way she was staring at me she was going to miss Grandmother very much. After all, she’d been Maria Elena’s entire life for the last five years.

  “I was bringing in the mail for you.” She pointed to the table and stood there as if I should tell her what to do.

  I looked at the stack of envelopes then turned to Maria Elena. “Just make yourself comfortable.”

  “I no knowing what I should doing.” She laced her fingers together in front of her.

  “It’s going to be lonely around here without Grandmother.” I picked up the letters and began to sift through them. Maria Elena was still looking at me. I felt like a mother with a three-year old who had run out of games to play. “You know, Maria Elena, you could start to put Grandmother’s things in boxes.”

  “Her things?” she said as if Grandmother were still alive.

  I was thinking of a reply when she began to nod her head. “Yes, I will taking care of her things.”

  “If there are any if her possessions you want, Maria Elena, you can have them.” I watched her disappear up the stairs.

  I spotted another envelope from the State of Virginia. I’d already gotten the bill. What could this be? I ripped it open. It was a bill from last year. They were saying I hadn’t paid the taxes from last year. That couldn’t be right.

  I walked into the television room and sprawled out on the couch. How much more could I take? Tears built up and soon I was gushing.

  “Don’t cry,” Abel’s voice whispered in my ear.

  I looked to see Abel bent over me. His form was clearer than yesterday, but he was misty around the edges, making him look like he had a halo around him.

  I sat up and he took a seat next to me. I let myself fall into his arms, but now he felt more like a soft pillow rather than the muscular well-formed man I was used to. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

  “Hmmm.” He kissed me on my forehead.

  “Wait. Why didn’t you come to the cemetery this morning?” I sat back up and looked at him.

  His face grew serious. “Your grandmother wanted to have her ashes scattered over the Moscva River.”

  “Abel, please. We’ve been down this path. She suffered from dementia. She was not Anastasia Romanov.” I felt so irritated at him that he wouldn’t accept the truth.

  “You don’t really know that.”

  “I do know that.” I jumped up from the couch and headed into the kitchen. There was only one thing to do.

  A few hours later, the lady from Gretna was sitting across from me at the dining room table.

  I choked back tears, thinking I was sitting just where Grandmother had died just three days ago.

  The lady sat quietly across from me, waiting for me to say something. I knew I was doing the right thing, but I wasn’t happy about it. “I’ve had a chance to consider your offer and I’ve decided it’s a fair one.”

  I waited for her reply, hoping they hadn’t found another property as nice as this one. If
she didn’t buy it, I feared the house could be sold for back taxes.

  “I’m very glad to hear that.” She leaned over to get something and then popped back up. “Where is it?”

  “What?” I just wanted her to get those papers out, and I wanted to sign them, and I wanted to get this over with, now that I didn’t have to feel guilty about uprooting Grandmother.

  “My briefcase,” she said a little too loudly. “I can’t find it. I put it right here when we sat down, but…” She lifted up the tablecloth and looked around the legs of the tables and chairs.

  She’d walked in with it. Where could she have put it? I knelt on the floor to help look under the table. “Maybe you set it in the kitchen on the way in.” That didn’t sound right, though. I’d have noticed if she did that.

  It smelled like an Abel Rollins prank. I came into the kitchen slapping my feet loudly on the floor so he’d hear me. “Where is it?” I whispered agitatedly.

  I saw something move outside. I looked out the window and saw Abel standing there. He was very hazy, but I could see the self-satisfied look on his smug face. Even as mad as I was he still looked cute, like a bratty little child you have a hard time staying mad at.

  Footsteps sounded across the kitchen floor. I looked back to see the lady from the Gretna Foundation walking toward me. “This is so embarrassing. Please, I do apologize. I must have neglected to bring it.”

  “That’s all right.” I wondered where Abel had put the briefcase.

  “Please, I will be out here first thing tomorrow morning and we’ll get these papers signed and we can work out the details after that.” She had her coat draped over her arm and she was still looking all over the floor for the briefcase she knew she’d brought with her.

  “Tomorrow will be fine.” By then I’d have Abel Rollins straightened out.

  I saw the lady to the door, all the while reassuring her that tomorrow would be fine. I could imagine how she’d felt, thinking she’d lost that ten million dollar cashier’s check. Knowing Abel though, she’d find it very soon, that is, after she was far from here.

  I turned around after I’d closed the door and saw Abel running up the steps.