Niki Slobodian 04 - The Devil Was an Angel

by J. L. Murray

  The bodies had been stabbed, I could see that. I looked closer at Forcas's body. It looked as though he had been stabbed once, clean through the heart. One blow and it had been over. It was almost a humane death. Lucifer, in his maddened state, would consider it just.

  I could feel Lucifer. The pull led me along the trail of blood. I didn't feel weak and shaky any longer. If anything, oddly, the grisly scene, the caustic smell of demon blood, the feeling of death, had all made me feel stronger. With sure steps, I followed the trail of jet-black blood off the main road.

  With each step, the noise grew louder. Cheers, mostly. Some crying. I could hear a woman's keening voice wailing. A chant I couldn't quite make out. There was a mob ahead, there was no mistaking it.

  The first person I saw was a female demon. She was standing outside of a house, her hands on her face. She saw me and her eyes got even wider.

  “Don't take them,” she said. “Please, not yet.”

  “Don't take who?”

  “My sons, they don't know any better,” she said. Tears were dripping down the backs of her hands. She shook her head. “I told them not to go. It's wrong. It's so wrong.”

  “Did you see Lucifer?” I said taking a step toward her.

  She nodded quickly. “I'm sorry.”

  “Why are you sorry?”

  The woman stared at me, seeming to shrink even smaller than she was.

  “Is he alive?” I snapped. I thought he was, but I couldn't be sure. The pulling inside me told me that he must be. But I hadn't learned to trust myself yet. After all, my insides had also just killed an entire village. I flinched away from the thought.

  “I-I don't know,” she said. She was terrified. “He wasn't moving. And he had this...this hole right in the middle of him.”

  “He can't die,” I said. “He told me he wasn't going to die.”

  The woman shook her head. She was quivering.

  “I'm sorry,” I said. “I didn't mean to scare you.” I walked away, leaving her behind. My steps were quick now, the sounds of my boots echoing dully. I could see the crowd now. They were moving slowly, reveling in their act. They were carrying something over their heads. Two things, by the look of it. One looked like a gnarled tree branch from where I stood, and the other was a very large, very unconscious body. Lucifer.

  I felt something dark stir inside me, the feeling familiar. The darkness that had always been just below the surface. I had thought only minutes ago that it had been the dregs of the Creator's power, that they were one. But I didn't feel the white light anymore. Not since it had exploded. It was what always tried to push me over the edge when I touched people, the same darkness that had pulled me into Boshta when I had touched his soul. It was part of me, and though it terrified me, I embraced it. Looking at Lucifer, limp and helpless, made me feel strange. I felt a familiar and dangerous calm. I narrowed my eyes at the demons cheering. I could make out their chant now. Cheerfully and enthusiastically they were crying three words over and over: In the Pit! In the Pit! In the Pit! I felt sick, but I pushed down the nausea.

  “Stop,” I said. My voice was painfully quiet, but carried, and even echoed. A few of the demons closest to me turned around. I was standing in the middle of the street. A dry, hot wind rustled my hair. Their eyes widened and they started to bow, to move away. I stepped forward. One by one the crowd quieted. Until there was only one voice chanting. I could see its owner. It was Eli Cooper. He looked around when he realized he was the only one carrying on. The crowd was parting for me. I walked slowly forward.

  The demons holding Lucifer above their heads were dressed as soldiers. I looked at their thick, leather breastplates. A large eye stared back at me, carved meticulously into the leather, a spiral at its center. I recognized it. The same eye was carved into the great doors of Sheol. I looked at one of the soldiers.

  “You're Lucifer's guard,” I said quietly. He tried to back away from me, but the two objects he and the other soldiers were bearing made it difficult for him to move on his own.

  “Put him down,” I said through gritted teeth. “And if you leave, I'll kill you myself.”

  The second object I had seen raised up, the one I had mistaken for a tree branch from far back, was no object. He moved his wizened head to glare at me. Grazial.

  “Put him down, too,” I said. The darkness swirled faster inside me at the sight of the old demon lord. “And hold him here.” The soldiers looked at each other with wide eyes, as if unsure if they should obey. “I'm sure you don't want to piss off Death,” I said. “It's too late for Lucifer. You've already dug your own grave. I can make your grave very unpleasant.”

  “Don't listen to her,” Grazial shrieked. “That bitch has no power! She cannot do anything to you.”

  I walked up to Grazial as he was being lowered to the ground. He wobbled as two guards propped him up on his feet. He was so small. Like an insect.

  “You hired Kane,” I said, my voice almost a whisper.

  He jutted his jaw at me. “You can't prove that.”

  I smiled then. It felt like madness, to smile then. But it seemed to come naturally. Grazial flinched. “I'm not Lucifer, Grazial,” I said. “And this isn't court. I am Death, and I am the only goddamn juror you're going to get.” I put a hand on his bare and flaccid chest.

  “Niki,” I heard Eli say. But the images were coming and I didn't look up. I just stared into Grazial's rheumy eyes as I felt his memories pass through me.

  A boy demon so long ago, poking a stick high above the city into the cave openings. I recognized them as the cliffs above Sheol. A demon ceremony, maybe a wedding. A female demon smiled at an older Grazial, but he did not smile back. A flash of the same woman, weeping on a bed as Grazial laughed above her. Grazial killing a man, the large demons around him in a circle cheering him on. He raised his fallen opponent's heart above his head in victory. A son being lowered into Grazial's arms. A secret trip to the world. There was a crack no one knew about, a young demon was telling him. A woman, a human, young and fresh and beautiful. He took her in the night. She was alone. He made her tell him she loved him. I saw Eli as a child then, Grazial introduced himself as his uncle. When Eli went to sleep that night, Grazial would rape his mother again. More sons, so many he couldn't keep track, and still, he visited Eli, his half-breed son. Then a feeling of pride washed over me. Grazial's pride. Eli had somehow come to Erebos. All the cracks had been closed, but Eli had come. Grazial watched him fight his brothers from a high window. It was magnificent. Grazial was sure he had died several times, but always came back. He fought them all. Another scene. A meeting. Grazial was being jeered by the other lords. Another meeting, this one dark and clandestine. Kane was smiling at him. Grazial was giving him a bag filled with money. Kill them all, and they will respect me again, he said. And then I saw us here now. From afar I saw myself standing here, my hand on Grazial's chest. And I knew what I had to do.

  I felt the pull, the exquisite, tantalizing darkness, pulling me deeper. I could hear someone screaming. I felt my hand reaching into Grazial's chest, little by little.

  “You killed them,” I said, my voice gravelly and not sounding like my own.

  “No!” he said. He was terrified now. Piss dribbled down his leg.

  “Their skulls were smashed. Men, women...babies, Grazial. You killed them. You killed them all. Their spirits wept. They couldn't even speak, their grief was so immense. Have you ever felt a grief like that?” He tried to speak, but only his mouth moved. No sound emerged. I could feel the tears falling from my face, growing cold as they fell down my neck. “They didn't even know why they died,” I said. “They didn't know what they were. Most of them thought they were human. They didn't know about your hate for them. They didn't know!” I screamed at him. Visions of the death scenes were shooting through my mind, only these weren't visions. They weren't Grazial's memories. They were mine. But Grazial's eyes widened as I felt them. Tears welled up as I reached farther inside him. I heard someone screaming my
name, but it was too late.

  “Can you see them?” I whispered. “Do you see what you've done?”

  “I can feel it,” he gasped. “Stop it. Why am I feeling this? I don't care about them.”

  “You can feel it because I felt it,” I said. “This is what you've done. This is how you're supposed to feel about murdering entire families.”

  “I'll tell you where Kane is,” he breathed, shaking his head. “Just let me live. I'll tell you everything.” A vision of Kane in my head then. Leaning close, whispering. Payment. A meeting-place decided on. A kiss on the cheek and then Kane disappeared.

  “I don't need you to tell me,” I spat. “I'm Death.” I grasped at the cool, flickering object that had been wrapping itself around my fingers. It wasn't sickly, as Boshta's had been; it was full and rich and full of life. It writhed in my fist, but I held on, knowing it couldn't move, that it had to obey me. “And this is what happens to people who challenge Death.” I pulled, ripping and pulling the silken strands away from his body. It glowed white for a moment after it pulled free, and then disappeared little by little, turning to dust in the air and swirling away in a dozen whirlwinds. Grazial stared at me for what felt like hours. Then his eyes rolled up into his head and he crumpled to the ground.

  The street was completely silent. The screaming had stopped. I could feel all the eyes upon me. I pulled Bobby's coat closer to my skin. I turned and found Eli staring at me in disbelief.

  “What have you done?” he said. He fell to the ground beside Grazial's body and shook it.

  “He's dead, Eli,” I said.

  He stared blankly at me, sitting in the dirt. There was no blood on Grazial's chest or on my hand. It was as if I had never even touched him. Except for the fact that he was dead.

  “He was my father,” Eli said. He shook his head, narrowing his eyes as if trying to comprehend.

  “He was evil,” I said. “Mourn him if you like, but he doesn't deserve it. I saw what he did to your mother.”

  Eli was in my face in seconds. I didn't back away, I just looked at him. “You have no right, Niki,” he hissed. “You have no right to judge him.”

  “I have every right,” I said. “He's a murderer. He hired Kane to kill hundreds of innocent people. And he didn't care.”

  Eli took a step back, his face full of confusion. “No,” he said. “Why would he do that?”

  “Because you were an embarrassment,” I said. “He was proud of you, but it was not the old way. He had the other halflings like you killed to restore his place among the lords. It was his plan, not yours, Eli. Maybe Lucifer will look past this.”

  Eli seemed to remember Lucifer then. I saw his body stir. He looked back to me, his face scrunched up in anger, as though he wanted to escalate the argument. I held up a hand.

  “I could touch you, too, if you want,” I said.

  “What happened to you?” he said.

  “I talked to God,” I said.

  “What?”

  “Never mind,” I said. “Go home. Bury your father. Show up tomorrow with your deepest apology. Maybe Lucifer will let you live.”

  I looked around. Most of the demons had disappeared, slinking away while I was killing Grazial. I considered whether I should feel remorse for killing the old demon, but decided that I would not. The visions of the murdered families were too fresh in my head. Grazial hadn't been a boy who had wandered into this life. He had been a killer even before all this had begun. And he'd let someone else do the dirty work for him. I just wouldn't feel any guilt whatsoever about his death.

  I crouched over Lucifer. The guards had stayed, just as I'd ordered, and they watched me nervously. I ignored them. The hole that had burned through Lucifer's chest seemed to be closing up. It was smaller now than it had been. The skin was knitting itself together, a hard, fresh pink scar forming over the burned meat and organs inside. I could see his chest moving.

  I reached out a hand, hesitating. Maybe if I touched him now, I would see his death. I would see his memories. But, gathering my nerve, I placed a hand on his bare stomach. All I felt was hot skin. I breathed a sigh of relief. I touched his stubbled cheek and he moved, groaning slightly. My chest ached, but there was no pull. I didn't understand it. The darkness in my guts, a storm of motion before, had settled, the turbulence subsiding like waves traveling out to sea. As I looked down at his face, I felt calm and languid. His eyelids fluttered.

  “Niki,” he whispered. He groaned and squeezed his eyes shut again. He put a hand to his chest, feeling the wound gingerly. “I did something bad, Niki. You're going to hate me.”

  “I don't hate you,” I said.

  “It's all right,” he said, his voice more of a moan. “I deserve it. I'm beyond redemption.”

  I bent over him. “No one is beyond redemption,” I whispered. I kissed him lightly on the lips just before he lost consciousness again. I stood up and looked at the soldiers. “Take him to the tower,” I said. “Carefully.”

  They were very eager to follow my orders.

  TWENTY-FOUR

  With Lucifer laid carefully on his bed, resting and healing, I closed the door quietly behind me. The guards were still here. A few of them had sat down in the hall and scrambled to rise when they saw me. I could smell their nervous sweat.

  “I want two of you inside the room, two outside. I want the rest of you pacing this hallway and around the bottom of the tower. No one comes in, understood?” They stared at me, eight sets of eyes as wide as a deer in the headlights. “Jesus, just nod if you understand me.” They slowly nodded, one by one. “If you keep him safe, I won't hurt you. Maybe he won't hurt you either, though you all deserve it. ” I turned to go. “Oh, one more thing,” I said, turning back to them. “If Lucifer goes crazy again, you can't let him leave. Do whatever you have to.”

  I found a frightened demon girl hurrying down the stairs.

  “I need some clothes,” I said. “Can you help me?”

  “Of course,” she said, bowing. “Follow me.”

  She led me back up the stairs to a high room filled with old clothes. Men's, women's, children's. Some jewelry, too, but I passed by the elaborate chest dotted with tiny drawers without so much as a glance. I pulled out a pair of men's trousers that looked about right and a linen shirt like the one Lucifer had been wearing when I brought him to the world.

  “Miss,” said the girl. Her voice was barely a squeak. “I think you would like this better. You would be beautiful.” She pulled out a blue evening gown beaded with what I was sure were pearls. I almost laughed.

  “Thanks, but no. I'd rather wear pants.”

  She bowed out of the room and I put on the clothes. I paused at the dress she had laid out. The fabric was navy and shone like glass. I touched the pearls, smooth under my fingers. In another life, a woman who looked just like me would have died for a chance to wear something so beautiful. I drew my hand back. Beautiful wasn't meant for someone like me. Not for someone who had just murdered an entire village.

  I knew they weren't all innocents, but the memory was still fresh and burned when I thought of it. There had been murderers among them. Soldiers who murdered demon families at night, those that knew about it and did nothing, and of course, Boshta. I didn't grieve for him at all. It was all tragic, and I had no right to judge. Eli had been right about that. And yet, I found myself judging anyway. As horrible as the deaths of the Outsiders were, there would be no more random killings in Erebos now. Judging from the blood I saw, Lucifer had killed a goodly portion of the lords, and after the whole city watched me kill Grazial, I was sure that there wouldn't be any more screaming in Erebos tonight. But there had also been Outsider children among the dead...

  As I headed out of the tower, I knew the soldiers would guard Lucifer with their lives. And I didn't plan to be away very long.

  At the gate above the city, I found Gage waiting for me.

  “Figured you'd come here,” he said. “What took you so long?”

  “Oh, you
know, saving the king of Hell from his subjects, killing my ex-boyfriend's dad, and...” I blew on my fingernails, feigning disinterest, “maybe learning where to find Kane.”

  His eyes widened comically. “No shit?” he said. “Nik, you're a goddamn goddess.”

  “Don't I know it,” I said, smiling. “He won't be there until tomorrow, though. So tonight I need you to do me a little favor.”

  “Anything,” he said. “Name it.”

  “I need you to hang out in Lucifer's room. Keep an eye on him. And if he tries to leave, cast a spell or ten to keep him there.”

  “No problem,” he said.

  “I got some great binding spells,” he said. “I don't have to feed him soup, do I?”

  “Nah, he's got people up the yin-yang in that tower,” I said. “All kinds of servants.”

  “Can he trust any of them?” said Gage.

  “Nope, not a one,” I said. “That's another reason we need you there.”

  “What are you going to do?” he said.

  “I've got an errand to run,” I said. “Plus I have to clean up the souls. Shouldn't take me more than a night. You up for it?”

  “Sure thing,” he said. “Just lead me to it.”

  “Where's Dorana?” I said, realizing the woman wasn't with him. “Didn't she come with you.”

  “Tried to talk her into it,” said Gage. “Nice gal. She said she had family somewhere.”

  “In Erebos?” I said.

  “No,” he said. “Did you know that people live out there? It wasn't just that one little village. She said there's creatures, scary shit, running around out there. Barbarians, too. Freaked me out just standing here waiting for you.”

  “It makes sense,” I said.

  “How so?”

  “Hell was here way before Lucifer got here,” I said. “Erebos can't be the only place to live.”

  “Can we get out of the open, though?” said Gage. “I got the heebie-jeebies.”

  “I'll take you to the tower,” I said. “You'll like it there. The food is amazing.”