Love Bi the Way

by Bhaavna Arora

  ‘So you are trying your hands at cooking! I’m happy.’ Rihana hugged Zara from behind.

  ‘I thought I’ll try my hands at some penne arrabbiata. Would you like some?’

  ‘Have you put meat in it?’

  ‘I can add some if you want,’ Zara said.

  ‘Yes, I wouldn’t mind some with meat.’

  ‘How was dinner? You’ve come back early, so I gather you didn’t get any meat there?’

  ‘The meat has to be gourmet. I don’t do average meat from the local butcher.’

  ‘Ah, so Mister Manoj didn’t quite make the cut, did he?’

  ‘I don’t mix business with pleasure.’ Rihana smiled, an eyebrow raised coquettishly.

  ‘So my alcoholic sex-fiend friend now suddenly has principles?’

  ‘Thieves follow principles more than saints,’ Rihana said, taking some pasta from the pan and putting it in her mouth.

  ‘I would actually have to agree with that. What should I season your pasta with?’ asked Zara, serving some pasta in a bowl.

  ‘With wine,’ Rihana said firmly.

  ‘I wouldn’t know the quantity. Do it yourself.’ Zara was unhappy about Rihana asking for wine.

  ‘I wanted him to believe that I had a boyfriend.’

  ‘Why would you do that?’

  ‘Just to rebuff his advances.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘When people know that you’re rich, successful and “single”, you’re like a criminal being hunted by the police force of eleven nations.’

  ‘Hmm.’

  ‘Have you considered marriage?’

  ‘Zara, please don’t ask me that question. It’s like someone asking me if I have considered suicide, and if I have, then how would I prefer it—jumping off a high-rise or setting myself ablaze?’

  ‘Then consider a stable relationship. Why do you run from commitment?’

  ‘A stable relationship is a myth. I haven’t yet come across a married man who hasn’t hit on me. Sooner or later, he does. I don’t believe in “committed” and “stable” relationships. They’re a figment of the imagination.’

  ‘Hmm.’

  ‘My misery has no end. Anyway, what about your divorce? Did you get the papers prepared?’ Rihana took advantage of the light conversation and asked Zara directly.

  ‘It’s not that simple, Rihana. I need time.’

  ‘I don’t understand . . . You take complicated business decisions so wisely, and when it comes to your own life, you chicken out?’

  ‘Professional decisions will affect only me. I can take them independently. But in case of the divorce, I know for a fact that it will get messy. I’m not prepared to meet him and his family.’

  ‘But they should feel like that. They are the guilty ones. Besides, one day you’ll have to get out of this so-called relationship before it suffocates you to death. It’s driving you crazy thinking about it! You should treat this as top priority. Get out of this muck. You can close your eyes to bad memories, but not to reality.’

  ‘I thought it was the other way around,’ Zara stated.

  ‘In your case, you have to forget the bad memories. And the reality is that your family and your husband’s family are both selfish. They didn’t care a fuck about you and left you to suffer. I’m not talking of revenge or anything sinister, but you should cut the cords that bind you, so that you can set yourself free.’

  And just at that moment, Zara froze. Her body went cold and she collapsed to the floor. Rihana followed the instructions to get her back to normal, and it was only after five minutes of convulsions that she regained consciousness. This time Rihana called Dr Chugh. He arrived within a half hour.

  ‘Why do you girls have a problem only when my wife doesn’t have a headache?’ the doctor joked, and Rihana smiled.

  ‘Zara’s blood pressure seems low. Has she been taking her medicines regularly?’ the doctor asked.

  Rihana and Zara exchanged a silent look. They weren’t sure what to say.

  ‘Yes, doctor,’ Zara lied.

  The doctor gave her an injection and asked her to relax. Rihana accompanied the doctor to the gate.

  ‘Doc, I want to discuss something with you . . . Actually, it’s about Zara’s divorce. Don’t you think it’s important for her to file for one?’

  ‘I agree it is, and it will set her free mentally. But this marriage has had a very bad impact on her. Give her time; it cannot be done as quickly as you are suggesting.’

  ‘We need to cut this cancerous overgrown tumour of bad memories and throw it away so she can breathe again. Whatever you may say, on paper she is still married to that spineless creep.’

  ‘Vinay, that’s his name.’

  ‘How does his name matter, doc? He is still a lump of shit to me because he couldn’t stand up for the truth. For Zara, and more so for himself.’

  ‘People have reasons to do what they do and they justify it with all their might. If he does stand up for himself and says it out loud, he can be punished 377 times.’ The doctor smiled sadly, almost at his car door.

  ‘Nothing justifies ruining someone’s life. Zara wouldn’t have become mentally unstable if not for him. And even if he stands up in front of the whole world and apologizes, Zara will not be able to get back to her former self.’

  ‘We’re all different people, Rihana, with different abilities to cope with the “unknown”. When something becomes known, the mind and body automatically adapt. The shock that you get from the unknown sometimes damages you for a long time . . . even forever.’

  Rihana’s eyes became wide as saucers. ‘You mean to say that Zara will never heal completely?’

  ‘I didn’t say that, but it may take a long time. The damage could be permanent. Psychological disorders are trickier than physiological ones. Has she spoken to her parents recently? Her father is concerned and calls me up sometimes. In my opinion, Zara is not able to make peace with the things that happened to her and deviated from her ideal perception of them. She has repressed feelings towards everyone—her father, her mother and Vinay. She should let it go, and for that she needs to make peace with herself. Many a time you start blaming yourself for the things that didn’t go right with you and you end up fighting with your own self. In such a scenario, external help has its limitations. She needs more internal motivation. A chunk of her has been taken away by the incidents in her life.’

  ‘Doc, she was absolutely normal and was getting back to her routine. She was cooking this evening, and has been going to office regularly. She also has some new clients. She seemed happy. But when the conversation steered to her filing for a divorce, she collapsed.’

  ‘We can slowly introduce the idea to her. I know it’s important, but let’s not push it. I’m glad that she has you to look after her, but make sure you take care of yourself too. I heard you’re soon going to have an exhibition in New York?’

  ‘Yes! But I’ll avoid going there. But where did you get the news from, doc?’ Rihana asked, surprised.

  ‘Mr Khurrana’s wife is my patient. He had brought her to the clinic yesterday, and we happened to speak about you.’

  ‘That’s what men do. Drive their women crazy,’ said Rihana, laughing lightly.

  ‘Because men are stupid, and being crazy is not enough.’ Both of them had a hearty laugh.

  ‘You are fun, doc.’

  ‘Not when I’m with my woman. Sometimes when she is in a mood—I mean a good mood—I have to keep pinching myself to know it’s real.’

  The laughter continued and Rihana wondered what part of her she had lost with those repressed feelings that sometimes ran like poison through her veins. She cleared her throat, distracted by her thoughts, and bid goodbye to the doctor. She went inside and saw that Zara was already fast asleep and snoring. She closed the door to Zara’s room and went to her own, Tiger following her closely behind. She would walk and then stop abruptly, causing Tiger to bump into her legs—she was enjoying their little game. She hugged Tiger and, seeing
his unconditional love for her, wept her heart out for no apparent reason. Or maybe she was just tired. Tiger licked her salty face after she was done crying.

  Despite trying for a fairly long time, Rihana couldn’t get even a wink of sleep and came down to Zara’s room. She cuddled her and Zara turned around to face Rihana with her eyes closed. Rihana looked at Zara, sleeping peacefully, looking like her angel. As if overpowered by overwhelming emotions, Rihana kissed Zara on the lips and slept half-hugging her.

  5

  Crapilicious

  ‘Aren’t you going for your “dog date”?’ Zara asked Rihana.

  ‘When was it?’ Rihana asked, trying to recollect.

  ‘Today!’ Zara reminded her.

  ‘Oh no! I saw that Zubair had pinged me in the morning, but I didn’t check what it was about. What would I do without you, Zara? And by the way, why aren’t you coming along? Come na, it’ll be so much fun!’

  ‘No, babe. I’m too drowsy, and besides, I need to call Ahmed and check how things are going at work. It’s been a while since I checked in. So you take Tiger for his date, and have fun while he’s at it.’

  Rihana looked at her fondly and said, ‘Sometimes I wish things were as simple as that. That we could be so consumed by our work that we would have no time for the things that make us sad.’ Zara stared at her as Rihana said, ‘You’ve been so quiet; I have no clue what’s going on in your mind and heart. Zara, let me know when you’re ready to talk, okay? I promise I will listen without saying as much as a syllable.’

  Zara managed a weak smile. ‘Hmm . . . yeah.’

  ‘So I’ll get ready and take Tiger out for his first play date,’ Rihana said, back to her beaming self.

  ‘Take Kanhaiya with you. Parking is such a bleeding problem there.’

  ‘Yes. There is a dearth of both good men and parking spots in India. Both bloody close to extinction,’ Rihana said while getting dressed.

  ‘I thought you were on your way to meet one?’

  ‘What will I do with one?’

  ‘Yeah, right! Especially when you can have two, three, four, or five!’ Zara chanted as she mockingly counted on her fingertips.

  Rihana rolled her eyes and then suddenly said, ‘I’ll have to take your driver and car then, Zara. Mine is a two-seater and I don’t want people to assume Kanhaiya is my boyfriend. It happens all the time and it’s really embarrassing.’

  Zara laughed heartily before saying, ‘Okay, take mine then.’

  Rihana blew her a flying kiss; her special way to say thank you without really saying it. ‘Okay, I’m off. You better be fine. I’ve asked Nandini to stay back and keep an eye on you for me.’

  Zara gave her a nasty look.

  ‘Don’t kill me with those beautiful eyes, and call me if you need me.’

  Zara blushed and waved at Rihana as she left.

  Rihana called for Kanhaiya, and Tiger followed her. Nandini handed over a hamper that she had made for everyone.

  ‘So Tiger, how do you feel going on your first play-date?’ Rihana asked her golden retriever while they waited for Kanhaiya. Tiger responded with a woof.

  ‘Are you sure you’re doing this for Tiger?’ Zara asked.

  ‘Zara, I know how to make proper use of my resources,’ Rihana answered.

  ‘So you’re using Tiger?’

  ‘Well, it’s a win-win situation. Everybody benefits.’

  ‘All the best, Tiger!’ Zara said, shaking her head. Tiger was excited because he could sense he was going somewhere in the car and that was enough to make him happy.

  They reached the place after a while and Rihana mentally thanked Zara for suggesting she take Kanhaiya along. The parking lot was bursting at the seams and there seemed to be pets peeping out of every car window.

  Rihana was surprised to see such a beautifully-done-up place for pets. It had a grooming centre, a pool for dogs to swim in and a huge fenced field for them to run around in. The caretakers were well-trained and very loving with the dogs.

  Tiger tread around cautiously at first. He was a little nervous to see so many of his kind there. After spending so much time around the girls, he suddenly didn’t know how to relate to his own species.

  ‘Hi! You’re already here?’ called out Rihana when she spotted Zubair. ‘And look at this little fella.’ Rihana patted and rubbed Gabbar with her hands.

  ‘Gabbar would hate the word “little” being used for him by a beautiful girl,’ Zubair said, smiling at her. Rihana caught the innuendo and it made her colour a bit.

  Tiger and Gabbar sniffed each other for a bit, and it was as easy as that—they became friends.

  The caretaker took the dogs away while Zubair and Rihana found a comfortable spot to sit.

  ‘Do you get Gabbar here every weekend?’ Rihana asked, looking at the dogs jump in the water.

  ‘Not every, but most,’ Zubair admitted.

  With the sun warming her back and the peace of the place, Rihana was beginning to relax.

  ‘I never knew of this place. It’s quite a getaway for dogs,’ she said, and sighed.

  ‘Yeah, and their owners too. Especially when they have good company.’

  ‘Why is this day turning out to be a let’s-make-Rihana-blush day?’ Rihana questioned.

  ‘When pretty girls blush, they look prettier.’

  Rihana only smiled at Zubair while her cheeks turned a bright shade of pink.

  Zubair and Rihana spent the whole day and evening together. They played volleyball, hung around the pool table and fooled around a bit before having lunch together, while Tiger and Gabbar were groomed at the end of their playing and feeding session.

  ‘This is the first time that Tiger has voluntarily left my side to spend time with others. He is otherwise mostly glued to me. I’m glad you acquainted me with this place,’ said Rihana, and thanked Zubair.

  ‘Why don’t you join me at my place for drinks and dinner to thank me some more?’

  Rihana knew what would follow and welcomed the invitation.

  ‘I’ll see if my driver can take Tiger back to the house and then maybe I can join you?’ Rihana said.

  ‘Great!’

  Every dog has his day, and today was definitely Tiger’s and Gabbar’s day. They smelt of fresh doggy shampoo, their coats were trimmed to perfection, and they looked every inch like well-heeled gentries. Rihana took Tiger to the car and put him inside with Kanhaiya. She then put on his seat belt, hugged him and asked Kanhaiya to drop him off with Zara at Cupid.

  ‘I’m glad they fed the dogs here, or I would’ve had to go back,’ Rihana said while getting into Zubair’s car. ‘Where do you stay?’ Rihana asked, fastening her seat belt.

  ‘I stay in Dwarka. It’s a new group-housing society, right next to the Taj Vivanta. I’m one of the first occupants, with a very famous Supreme Court criminal lawyer, Rohan Shrivastav, as my neighbour. We moved into the society almost at the same time,’ Zubair said, starting his car.

  ‘That’s interesting.’

  ‘Indeed it is. Though he is a criminal lawyer, you should actually hear some of Rohan’s divorce stories. You’ll be more surprised than shocked. From long to short and hard to limp, everything is discussed there—and we think India is conservative!’

  ‘It’s not. When it comes to greed, women are quite the extortionists and they can come out with all kinds of reasons,’ said Rihana; she had also heard of various women using divorce and exaggerated charges to claim huge amounts of alimony from their former partners.

  ‘True that! And many men become victims. Especially the oldies who are looking for a settlement at that advanced age.’

  ‘But who tells them to show off in the first place? Gifting diamonds and putting their wealth on display? It’s almost like telling the girl, “Come, loot me!”’ Rihana said, as Zubair took a sharp turn.

  ‘A rock will work wonders as a cover-up for men of that age with shrivelled dicks,’ Zubair said matter-of-factly.

  ‘Couldn’t agree more. A
nd why not! On second thoughts, diamonds are not such a bad idea,’ Rihana said, a grin on her face.

  ‘And love?’ Zubair asked, confused.

  ‘There is no such thing as love, Zubair. There is only proof of love, like there is proof of crime and murder. Though one might find proof showing crime and murder, finding proof of love is rare.’

  ‘Whoa, that’s such a strong reaction. I wonder what reason a girl like you would have to evoke such strong sentiments,’ Zubair said.

  ‘The same reasons I have to not believe in God.’

  ‘Really? So someone has clearly been burnt by love . . . You know, Rihana, many people believe that love is God.’ He looked at her to see how she felt about what he’d just said.

  ‘Yes! And the same people also believe that when they fart, they actually shoot out tiny rainbows that sound like a unicorn’s laughter,’ Rihana countered with disgust.

  ‘Ha ha ha!’ Zubair laughed out loud, making the frown forming on Rihana’s face vanish. ‘You’re beautiful and funny,’ he said, making Rihana smile.

  ‘A woman could get more intoxicated on a man’s compliments than on wine,’ she said blushing again.

  ‘I’m pretty sure you must be used to compliments by now.’

  ‘I am. But they are always welcome,’ Rihana was now participating in Zubair’s game of flirting by disarming him, little by little.

  ‘But why would a criminal lawyer take up divorce cases?’ Rihana asked about Rohan.

  ‘Some divorce cases take a criminal turn and that’s when they fall into Rohan’s lap. You remember that actress Rubina Mallik married to the politician Amar Joshi?’ Zubair asked.

  ‘Yes, they are finally divorced now,’ Rihana answered after a few seconds of recollection.

  ‘That case had a criminal aspect and was handled by Rohan. He got Amar Joshi safely out of it without paying any alimony. Can you believe it?’ Zubair asked, surprised. But Rihana’s thoughts were somewhere else. She was thinking of getting him for Zara.

  ‘That reminds me, what is your poison?’ Zubair asked courteously.

  ‘Something that was made by God,’ Rihana said, switching between thoughts.