Silver

by Rhiannon Held

  Andrew knew he should say something, but the silence stretched. What was he supposed to say, though? He wanted it as badly as she apparently did, but she was crazy? That he didn’t want to take advantage, but then again, hadn’t she proven herself pretty hard to take advantage of? And she’d started it!

  “Thank you, Death. I’d figured that out for myself.” Chin tilted up, Silver returned to the bathroom and her clothes. Andrew exhaled in relief. It was just the long dry spell talking, that was all, confronted with the scent of an interested female Were. Better than a cold shower, he needed to get out of the hotel and into fresher air.

  Silver stayed in the bathroom, and Andrew stayed in the main room, pacing until the pizza guy arrived. He paid the boy, subtracted a few pieces to take with him, and left the rest in the box open on the bed. “I’ll be back in a few hours,” he told the room generally. Time to go see what kind of wilderness Seattle could muster for him to run in.

  15

  “Idiot.” Silver straightened from sitting with her head in her good hand. She could smell Dare still, though only dimly. “Idiot. As if he didn’t have enough to worry about.” She wasn’t speaking to Death for the moment, but the habit of organizing her thoughts out loud did not die so easily.

  “Oh, he always has this effect on las chicas.” The accented female voice was back again.

  Silver pointed to Death. “You. Will be quiet, or I will tear out your throat with my teeth, whether my wild self is here to help me or not.”

  Death made a gesture much like a shrug, ruff fur bristling up and smoothing down as the muscles underneath moved. His silence was mocking, but at least it was silence.

  “We can always pretend it didn’t happen.” Silver returned to her earlier train of thought. “I’m sure he’d be as happy as me to do that.” She squirmed as a flutter below her stomach reminded her she hadn’t started this out of nowhere. She hadn’t felt that flutter since her wild self ran away. But it wasn’t like she needed him to take care of it, anyway.

  That was best done under running water, though, or he’d smell it the moment he came in. Silver sighed and stood to go find some.

  * * *

  The run helped a little, letting Andrew lose himself in the exertion, but the park was small, and he found himself not ready to go back when he’d done a couple circuits. He ended up at a bar, not really watching the game on TV, and intimidating any humans away from sitting near him.

  When his phone rang, he considered ignoring it. He checked the ID first, at least, and frowned down at Benjamin’s name. Dammit, he didn’t want to talk to anyone right now, but he owed Boston better than a snub.

  “Yeah?” Andrew could hear from Benjamin’s silence that his greeting had come out sharp.

  “You’ve certainly dropped a bomb in Roanoke, boy.” Benjamin’s voice was dry. “May I ask what you were thinking, breaking with Rory?”

  Andrew swallowed a growl. He really didn’t need this right now. “He didn’t leave me any choice. He ordered me back there—to guard him personally, probably, the pussy. I’m not leaving her here. I don’t trust any of these people, they all either want to put her down, or they’re completely incapable of protecting her.” He didn’t realize how loud he was getting until the nearby humans glared at him.

  Ben’s silence after that was thoughtful, and Andrew realized he’d sounded much more sure of himself than he had been at the time. He couldn’t think of any other decision he could have made, even with the time he’d had to think it over and regret it, so perhaps he’d made the right decision after all.

  “I’ve been waiting for you to find the thing that would bring you back to yourself, boy. After Spain. You took your time about it, I must say. A waste of talent.”

  Andrew gritted his teeth. He didn’t need the voices of his past haunting him yet again. “Don’t.”

  “As you wish.”

  Andrew considered bristling at the soothing tone, but he knew Benjamin wasn’t being patronizing. “It’s been a long day,” he said in a sideways apology. “And I don’t know where I’m going to go once I catch the killer.” That was more than he’d planned to admit, so he hurried to cover it over with a subject change. “Any progress on that lone?”

  “Nothing yet.” Frustration seeped into Benjamin’s tone. “I haven’t heard from the woman I sent after the lone. It’s unusual for her to not report in promptly. But it’s only been a day. She’s probably hot on his trail in wolf, hasn’t had a chance to get back to her phone.”

  They said their good-byes after that, the conversation too strangled by subjects Andrew was avoiding to continue. Andrew set his jaw as he put his phone away and ordered another drink. He wasn’t going to think about any of this right now.

  Silver was asleep on the far bed when Andrew returned to the room. Her breathing changed as he entered, so she’d undoubtedly heard him and was awake, but she didn’t open her eyes, so he politely pretended she was still asleep.

  It was later than he’d intended since he’d wasted a lot of time walking himself sober. Usually werewolf healing resulted in a better alcohol metabolizing rate, but one could always swamp it if one really tried. Those last few whiskeys after talking to Benjamin had probably been a mistake.

  At least he hadn’t drunk-shifted. He’d busted plenty of young Were for playing stray doggy along the freeway because they thought it would be funny when smashed.

  He ran himself a glass of water in the bathroom to kill the hangover—fast healing didn’t do much for dehydration in the absence of water—and stood in the entryway to watch her as he drank. He could see perfectly well in the room’s darkness, but colors were washed out. Silver looked almost normal when her white hair was seen only in the context of light and dark. He wanted to stroke it.

  Her wounds showed dark on the arm flopped beside her, the lines curling over the pale skin. Snakes indeed. He could see their shape now in the contrasting light. Tiredness washed over him. He needed sleep if he really was going to challenge John tomorrow. And yet he was standing here trying to find the features of the strong woman she must have been underneath the stress and blankness the silver had washed over them.

  Water. Bed. He pulled himself away and padded to the other bed, drinking as he walked.

  Silver smelled like she might be awake when he looked over at her the next morning, but her breathing was still even. It was possible she was dozing, close to the surface but not quite awake. They smelled much the same. Either way, the shower’s noise would wake her more gently than he could.

  The shower smelled a little off from Silver using it the night before. Andrew pushed that thought away and dressed and shaved quickly. They could raid the continental breakfast on the way out through the hotel lobby.

  “You ready?” Silver asked from the doorway. Rather than shove it inside her jacket, today she’d tucked her bad arm into her jeans’ hip pocket. It still didn’t sit quite right, but it looked more natural. She used her other hand to settle some of her hair’s fluffiness.

  “As I’ll ever be.” Andrew gripped his rental car keys until they pressed painfully into his hand. Sleep hadn’t changed his decision. He had to do what was necessary to catch the killer, including risking challenging Seattle. Even if that meant he was taken down by the other Western packs afterward, when he could no longer order the Seattle pack to keep quiet about what had happened. He needed to find Silver’s attacker as soon as possible; having to find him before the Western packs found out about the change of alpha was no more time pressure. He couldn’t think about losing the challenge. He’d just have to win.

  He spotted a Denny’s on the drive to the pack house and pulled in on an impulse. Better to face this after a proper meal. After seating them, the plump waitress eyed him with distaste when he ordered Silver’s drink for her. Andrew stared the waitress down until she went away.

  Silver’s attention was caught by a small child at a nearby table. The girl banged her neon green plastic spoon on the neon purple dish her pa
rents had brought with them. They were no fools, either, as the dish contained about three molecules of scrambled egg, hardly enough to bother wiping up should they reach the table, the floor, or her hair.

  Andrew clenched his jaw, jerking his own eyes away. His daughter would be a teenager by now, he reminded himself. A teenager who probably hated him. It was only in his memory that she lingered at that age, and a few years older.

  “Tell me about your mother’s pack,” he said to break the silence. Silver had her chin cupped in her hand to watch the child, and she looked up in surprise. It was a calculated risk—he didn’t want the memory to drop her into the madness, but this might be far enough from the trauma to be safe. And she might have some insights that would help him in dealing with them this morning.

  Silver’s eyes flicked across his face, and her expression remained lucid. “The former alpha always had a sense of honor, like you. Not many would have ceded my brother territory rather than beat the disobedience out of him. His nephew, the current alpha, is very like him. You two might get along well, if not for the competition for power.” The waitress delivered his coffee and her juice, and Silver dragged a finger along the condensation on her glass without drinking. “The pack raised us. A human hunter took my mother by accident a little after our Lady ceremonies.”

  Andrew waited a moment, but that seemed to be all the information that was forthcoming, so he slipped in to fill the silence. “They seem like a healthy pack. No fear. Other than of me, of course.”

  Silver sipped her drink, lips curving in their press against the glass. “You’re very scary,” she teased. Andrew blandly raised his eyebrows at her and she laughed outright, then sobered. “It would go better if they weren’t afraid of you.”

  Andrew slumped back in his chair. Wasn’t that the heart of the matter? “I wish they weren’t, but if wishes were rabbits, everyone would feast. It wasn’t anything I planned, it was a side effect.”

  “Because of those you killed?”

  Andrew clenched his jaw. “Mostly, yes. And the fact that no one likes an enforcer.”

  “Because it’s his job to carry out punishments.” Silver’s lips twisted as she said it, as if she wasn’t quite sure what to think about it.

  “Someone had to. Rory probably … couldn’t have kept Roanoke together without me. I don’t know what he’s going to do now.” He tapped the cutlery napkin roll against the table. He couldn’t afford to worry about that at the moment. After he’d found the killer, and after he’d extricated himself from the West without permanent injury. Then he could think about that.

  Silver reached out to still the fidgeting. “I do understand,” she said with a half smile. “But you’re not an enforcer now. Stop expecting that they will fear you, and maybe they won’t.”

  Andrew looked down at her hand over his. “Easier said than done, even if you’re right.” She probably was. He was learning to trust Silver’s instincts about pack dynamics. It was as if her twisted perspective on the outer world made her see inside people more clearly.

  When the waitress returned to take their orders, Silver saved him from further server censure by pointing to one of the large, bright pictures decorating the menu’s side. The parents and their little girl left, and Silver and Andrew ate in silence.

  When they arrived at the pack house and rang the doorbell, no one answered for some time. Andrew frowned. They knew he was here. They would have heard him drive up, smelled him at the door. His first thought was that John was trying to avoid the fight, but that made no sense. No one but Andrew knew what he’d planned. What else was going on?

  Finally, the door opened. Pierce glowered at them. “John’s out for the moment.” He wore only pants and was unshaved, his hair still tousled from sleep. Andrew could smell other Were in the house, but they must have nominated the beta to deal with him. Everyone else was keeping out of sight. Andrew almost smirked when he noticed Pierce’s nose was still crooked. He caught the expression before it formed. Unprofessional, especially since he might have to work closely with Pierce soon.

  But where was John? Andrew thought back to Michelle’s words about the alpha’s strange behavior. John had read so straightforward in person, it was hard for Andrew to believe that he would be in on anything. But what was going on, then? John had to have known that Andrew would be back the next morning, so he was either trying to be rude, or whatever was going on was so important it couldn’t be put off until another time.

  It probably had nothing to do with Silver or her pack’s killer, of course. It could be perfectly innocent. And yet the small suspicious voice at the back of Andrew’s mind was hard to squash. “I’ll wait,” Andrew told Pierce. Wait, and try to get some information from the beta.

  Pierce started to shut the door in their faces. They would wait outside in the alpha’s absence, apparently. Silver put her hand on the jamb so he had to stop or smash her fingers. “Can I at least get some breakfast?” Andrew couldn’t see her expression, but her body language was one pathetic droop. He’d watched her eat not fifteen minutes ago, and the protective instincts he felt around low-ranked Were stirred anyway.

  Pierce’s face softened and he opened the door to usher her inside. He glared at Andrew as he invited himself along behind but didn’t object. Andrew kept his head down to hide his smile. Well played, Silver.

  Pierce strode ahead to reach the kitchen first, where he rummaged around and handed Silver a huge chocolate muffin from a multipack on top of the fridge. He watched solicitously as she devoured it.

  As he entered the kitchen, Andrew sniffed, trying to find anything unusual or something that had changed since the day before. Under the cleaning products it was just a lot of Were, some male, some female, some children, all mixed with the scent of the human woman. No accounting for taste. If something was out of place here, he couldn’t tell without knowing every pack member by scent.

  “How long do you think John’ll be?” Andrew asked. Pierce’s shoulders set, and he remained silent. Andrew drew in a deeper breath of the man’s scent. If he wanted answers, he’d probably have to beat it out of the man, and he didn’t need the information that badly.

  Silver gave a shiver, the single violent kind from long-term cold, and Pierce’s attention snapped back to her. She made a show of looking exasperated at the concern. “I’m a little cold. I’m not going to break into pieces.”

  “I’m sure one of the girls has something warmer you could borrow.” Pierce left Silver to her muffin, and strode off to appropriate something. Andrew watched Silver the moment Pierce’s eyes were off her. No way she was that cold, not with how she was standing now, never mind the fact she’d been fine all morning on the way over here.

  Andrew came to stand close to Silver, exhaling in amusement and stealing a muffin piece. “Aren’t you the switch?” he murmured. Some Were were low-ranked, some were high-ranked, just by pure nature, though the fine gradations of hierarchy changed based on circumstance and packmates. Of course one could always attempt to act like the other, but most often it just didn’t smell right in some metaphorical way. Andrew had assumed he’d discovered Silver’s dominance as her madness receded, but she’d roused Pierce’s protective instincts by seeming truly weaker than him. She smirked at Andrew now, changed her posture, and he was struck anew by what a vulnerable little thing she was.

  At least until she punched him in the side. He expected to find her laughing, but the teasing that had prompted the blow faded from her face almost immediately. “Survival is a harsh mistress. It’s better to be able to both fade from notice and bully away the bottom-feeders, rather than be limited to one or the other no matter the situation.”

  He’d made a promise to himself last night to keep his hands off her, but Andrew slid a hand under her hair to squeeze the back of her neck anyway. She sighed, releasing some tension with the sound.

  Andrew stepped back. “I just want to get this over with. Then I can order people to answer me.”

  “Well, you
certainly weren’t doing very well coaxing him even when I had him distracted,” Silver said, dry. Her body language curled back in on itself as Pierce returned with a leather jacket. She pushed Pierce away when he tried to pull the jacket on after guiding her dead wrist into the sleeve. Her dexterous wiggle to settle the jacket made for good watching from behind.

  Andrew jerked his mind back onto the matter at hand. Enough of this. “I’m going to call John.” He pulled out his phone. It rang four or five times before John picked up, growl already running under his voice, even in the greeting.

  “Having fun wherever you wandered off to? I think your beta’s getting twitchy, having me here without you.” Andrew kept his tone light to offset the baiting phrasing.

  “Fuck you, Dare. I’m practically there.” The call cut off, and Andrew imagined that the end button had been pushed harder than was good for the phone.

  A car turned into the driveway and they all looked toward the front door. A car door slammed, locks beeped, and John’s half-running footsteps reached the house.

  “It wasn’t supposed to take this long,” John snapped as he entered. He smelled strongly of humans, which could mean anything about where he’d been. Humans were everywhere. John tried to brush past Andrew and Silver, but Andrew caught his elbow.

  “And what would it be that wasn’t supposed to take long?” he said, putting a little command into his tone.

  John’s lip curled up into a snarl. “I swear on the Lady that it’s personal pack business. Nothing to do with the one you hunt. Is that good enough?” He met Andrew’s eyes, clearly expecting the other man to step back from the confrontation. Andrew met his show of dominance squarely, shoving down the mental voice that called him a fool for taking this risk. He had no choice. No choice but to risk it.

  They stayed, locked in the stare, until John broke first. “You gave your word,” he growled. “I invited you into my territory, and now you betray me and try to take it for Roanoke?” He put a hand on Andrew’s shoulder and shoved. Andrew rocked to absorb the blow and stayed where he was.