Alexa O'Brien 05 - Death Wish

by Trina M. Lee

  “You’ve done a good job of staying alive,” she said, emotionless. It wasn’t a compliment. “For the record, it’s nothing personal.”

  Her lack of emotion was getting under my skin. I wanted her to be mad or aggressive. Anything that indicated she had a reason to want me dead. This calm demeanor of hers was pissing me off.

  “It’s personal now.” I risked a glance at Falon who wore a mask of confusion. So, he wasn’t in on her little plan to off me. Or, was he just a great actor? “I killed Veryl for you. You owe me answers. Why?”

  Jez returned quickly, unwilling to leave me alone with the demon. I was grateful for her presence. She stayed back where she could observe the entire situation. Her pupils were large in response to the growing excitement. I could feel it, too, crawling over me like ants on my skin.

  Lilah pursed her lips, her gaze unwavering. “You killed Veryl because you wanted to. I just gave you the reason you sought to justify it to yourself. I respect you, Alexa. I may even like you a little bit. But, you’re a threat to me now.”

  Now? When had I become a threat to Lilah?

  ‘Right around the time you gained power over vampires.’ Arys’s voice echoed in my thoughts. It startled me. I’d forgotten he was there.

  I kept my attention on Lilah, acknowledging Arys with a thought but answering her.

  “Then why the hell won’t you try to take me out yourself instead of having others do it for you?” I was seething. Knowing I had placed a level of trust in her over the years made me feel like a fool. She had saved my ass in the past just to turn on me now. I would never understand demons.

  “It’s been interesting to see how you pull off staying alive each time. You’re a worthy opponent.” She dodged my question, answering it by doing so. Something was stopping her from killing me herself. Or, more likely, someone.

  I found it interesting that Falon was so quiet. It wasn’t like him to refrain from tossing in his opinion. His silence spoke loud and clear, telling me that his loyalties lie with Shya first and foremost, regardless of who he took as a lover. Whatever Lilah’s issue with me was, Shya wasn’t part of it.

  The wolf rose up inside me to stare out at the demon. I was quaking inside, my power running hot and ready to be unleashed in a torrent. “You have no idea what an opponent I can be.”

  We stared into one another, each seeking out an unseen weakness in the other, anything to gain the edge without making a move. I was ready for her, braced for the heavy slap of demon tainted vampire power, but it never came. She wouldn’t do it.

  With a rustle of feathers, Falon disappeared, vacating before things got ugly. This way he could honestly tell Shya that he wasn’t involved. I was tense, hoping Lilah would do something, anything to end this now.

  “Let’s just get this over with,” I suggested, gesturing for her to take a shot at me. “You want me dead. Well, I’m standing right in front of you.”

  Lilah smiled, a small wistful tug of her lips that was gone as quickly as it had come. “I may be many things, but a fool isn’t one of them. As long as Shya wants you alive, I can’t be the one to kill you. Which just makes this that much more difficult.”

  “Are you kidding me?” I snapped. “Demon politics have you sending idiot vampires after me when we could just finish this here and now?”

  She shrugged. So cold and unfeeling. She was likely the only vampire in existence that had never been human.

  “I underestimated you. I won’t make that mistake again. Like I said, this isn’t personal. I have an agenda, and I refuse to allow you or Shya to interfere with that.”

  I had never wanted to see Shya more than I did right then. My hand strayed to the dagger at my hip, the one he had given me. It would kill a vampire with barest nick of the blade. It would work on Lilah. She may not be willing to throw a shot, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t take one.

  Lilah’s gaze flicked to the Dragon Claw. “I may not have authority to kill you outright, but I can and will defend myself.”

  She wanted me to make the first move. That’s all it would take to bypass whatever was keeping her from doing it.

  I advanced on her, the Dragon Claw humming with power in my grasp. “Good to know.”

  Arys’s warning echoed in my thoughts. ‘Don’t do it, Alexa. It’s never so simple with demons. She’ll lead you into a trap. Get out of there.’

  ‘If I don’t deal with this now, her hitmen will keep coming.’

  ‘You can’t simply act with someone like her. You must plan.’

  Lilah watched me expectantly, an eager gleam in her eyes. All I had to do was make a move, the wrong one, and she would kill me. It was her loophole. If I brought it on myself, she was home free. As badly as I wanted to plunge my dagger into her chest, I knew it would be a mistake.

  I held myself back despite the wolf’s insistence that I eliminate the threat. As long as she couldn’t initiate a fight, we were at a stalemate. There was no threat.

  So, rather than attack Lilah, I decided to feel her out. Reaching out metaphysically, I touched her power, sensing the depths of it. It was rude and invasive but in no way an attack.

  Right away, I felt the cloying hand of demon power clinging to her like a second skin. It felt murky and dark, absolute black. However, it was missing the deep abyss-like draw that Shya’s power possessed. Lilah’s was limited, confined by the barrier of her curse. I could feel it there, an invisible force binding her powers, and beneath it was the cool but familiar sensation of vampire.

  Lilah could be a threat. No doubt about it, she had the ability to be lethal. I’d seen her drop a demon with just a command, but I wasn’t a demon. I was a mortal and a threat. I had the advantage. I just had to find a way to keep it.

  She was far too calm and casual for this situation. I couldn’t handle her demeanor. She wanted me dead, and dammit, that was personal. I wanted her to be mad, to show hatred or spit a venomous word my way. The fact that she didn’t find me worthy of any passion or emotion stirred a fire deep inside me. I wanted to destroy her.

  A bored expression marred her face. She crossed her arms and gave me a look like one might give an annoying, yappy little dog. “Is that it? No showdown after all? Pity.”

  I stepped back toward the door. Arys was right. I needed time to think this over. Acting rashly would get me killed.

  ‘Stop the presses! Alexa O’Brien has just admitted to herself that her lover is right about something. That’s newsworthy.’ Arys’s self-assured chuckle filled my thoughts.

  I ignored him, unwilling to acknowledge his gloating. I pulled the door open, half expecting to find Falon on the other side. He was long gone.

  “Oh, we’ll have our showdown,” I said, waiting for Jez to exit the building first. I glanced back at Lilah. “If you’re as big a bad ass as everyone thinks you are, you’ll stop with the hits and take me on yourself. Either way, I’m coming back for you.”

  Jez hovered just outside, waiting anxiously for me to join her. I could feel Arys’s obvious relief, but I didn’t see how putting off the inevitable was a good thing. I wanted it over.

  I was about to let the door slam shut when Lilah’s next words stopped me in my tracks. For the first time since I arrived, her tone changed.

  “Family is a funny thing, isn’t it, Alexa? One minute they’re dead, and then low and behold… alive after all.”

  Slowly, I turned to face her. I’d never fought so hard to keep my feelings from showing in my eyes. With a carefully constructed blank look, I pinned her with a dead stare.

  “Your point?”

  “It would be a shame if something happened to your sweet little sister. You’ve barely had time to catch up.” She openly taunted me, knowing like every damn demon somehow knows, the right trigger.

  I snapped. Human thought was gone. Rationale deserted me. The wolf burst forth in a territorial explosion of fangs and claws. Jez grabbed for me, but she was too late.

  I lunged, hitting Lilah square on in the chest
. We went down, sprawling with me on top of her. I succeeded in wrapping my hands around her throat. Before I could slam her head against the floor, she planted a foot on my stomach and sent me flying. I flipped over her, landing flat on my back in the hallway.

  It crushed the breath from me, but I barely noticed. I was on my feet, lashing out with a blast of power before I could stop myself. A burst of swirling blue and gold exploded against Lilah. In the same moment, I was airborne, knocked off my feet by Arys.

  He stood between the two of us, projecting an energy barrier meant to keep us apart. I already knew that with enough concentration I could break it. Could Lilah?

  With a cold, calculating stare she scanned each one of us in turn. I half expected her to take a shot at Arys, but she was wary of him. Still maintaining her calm and cool exterior, Lilah spun on her heel and stalked out.

  She paused at the door and set her deep orange gaze on me. Regret shone in her eyes. “I really didn’t want it to have to be this way.”

  I watched her go, feeling a swell of mixed emotion rise within me. Not only did I have to stay two steps ahead of Lilah, now I also had to keep her from getting to Juliet. Dammit. Why couldn’t it have been someone else? Why Lilah?

  What made it worse was that I really believed her. It wasn’t personal. There was something about Arys and I that threatened her. Why exactly, I didn’t know. I intended to find out.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The early morning sun was blindingly bright. Even with sunglasses, it was too much for my sensitive eyes. I squinted behind my shades, listening as a fireman explained the extent of the damage to my house.

  The frame was still standing. It was strong enough for me to go inside and look around, but otherwise, there wasn’t much left to salvage. Oh well. At least I still had the property.

  I nodded to indicate that I was ready to enter what was left of my home. The fireman led the way, and I followed with my hopes up. I didn’t expect much to have survived the fire, but I was keeping my fingers crossed on a few items.

  The stench of smoke was thick. My lungs grew heavy as I tried to take shallow breaths. Everything was covered in a thick layer of soot. Every single surface was layered in black.

  I walked through the house feeling numb. Numb was good. I had reached my emotional capacity for the week.

  Everything was ruined. The television was a melted mass of crap along with every other electronic and appliance on the main floor. The framed picture of Shaz and me was shattered on the floor, burnt to oblivion. Logically, I knew the photo could be reprinted. Still, I couldn’t help but feel like it was a bad omen.

  My bedroom was what I wanted to see the most. I hurried down the stairs as fast as I could safely go. My clothes were soot-stained garbage. I didn’t care about that. What I really needed to see was the locked box I kept in the bottom drawer of my dresser. I yanked the charred drawer open, fearful the box would be ruined or missing.

  It was right where I’d left it. I easily found the key on the ring with my car keys. I could have wept with relief when I saw everything inside it safe and untouched.

  I ran my fingers over the smooth surface of Kale’s cross. I was ecstatic to see it was ok. Alongside it was the small velvet bag that contained an amulet from Lena. Through the bag, I could feel it, a little piece of stone that vibrated with deep earth energy, calling to my wolf.

  I relocked the box and shoved it into my shoulder bag. Other than the picture of Shaz and me, these two things meant the most. Everything else could be replaced.

  A brief look in the garage revealed a Jaguar that stunk to high heaven of smoke. A detail job might not be enough. Raoul’s car spent a lot of time in the garage; I didn’t drive it much. It had still smelled like him. His scent had clung to the interior, sealed inside because the doors so rarely opened. I hated that I liked it. That scent was gone now, burnt away with the rest of what had once belonged to Raoul.

  A conversation with the fireman revealed that they couldn’t determine where or how the fire had started. I knew, of course. Supernatural fire wasn’t so easy to trace. He gave me some information about what my options would likely be in this situation. Rebuild the house starting with the salvageable framework still standing or tear it down and sell the property. I needed some time to think about it.

  * * * *

  A few days had passed since the fire. I had been lying low at Arys’s house, pondering possible outcomes of both the Lilah predicament and the FPA investigation. If the FPA discovered Kale and I had killed Abigail Irving, what was I going to do about it?

  There was also the matter of Kale’s disappearance. I had yet to hear from him. He had been known to lock himself away with random women at The Wicked Kiss for days at a time, but this was different. I could feel it.

  After leaving the remains of my house, I ventured out on a two-hour trip to the store. I was exhausted and looked forward to the escape I would find in sleep, but I needed to start reorganizing my life. New underwear was a good place to start.

  Arys had been faced with the reminder that, though I was nocturnal, I was still a daywalker. He’d paced the house like a cat in a cage, spouting several reasons why I shouldn’t go out alone even though the sun was up. Vampires and demons were trapped as long as the sun was in the sky. Lilah posed no threat.

  I returned to Arys’s house in the early afternoon. Dropping my bags in the kitchen, I abandoned them and headed for the bedroom. It wasn’t going to be easy to stay with him. I adored every moment I spent with the man, but I was used to having my own space. A pang of sadness had me feeling sorry for myself. I missed my house.

  Arys was buried beneath a mass of bright red sheets. It was too hot for anything heavier. His brow was creased in a frown, and he clutched the pillow tight in one hand. I hadn’t been having the greatest dreams lately either.

  I stripped down nude and climbed between the sheets. My dark vampire lay next to me, deep in the strange slumber of the undead. I stroked a hand absently through his silken hair, hoping to find comfort in touching him.

  The window was so well covered that it was impossible to tell visually that the sun was up. I stared around the dark room, seeing nothing, my thoughts on overdrive. I contemplated what I should do with the remnants of the house. Selling the property and moving on was the best option, yet letting go of it was too hard to imagine.

  I waited for sleep, begged for it. I slipped into that hazy in-between state and floated in limbo. Soon enough, I descended into a deep slumber, then my phone rang, jarring me awake. Arys stirred, and I rushed to silence it. I was hopeful that it would be Kale.

  “Alexa, I’d like to see you tonight.” Shya was the last person I had expected. He didn’t waste time on phony pleasantries. “Midnight.”

  “This is about Lilah, isn’t it?” A glance at the time on my phone indicated I had two hours until midnight. I didn’t feel like I’d slept that long.

  “Should it be?”

  “No?” I wanted a chance to talk to him about Lilah but didn’t think this was it.

  He directed me to an old abandoned church a few miles down the road from his sprawling modern home. It sounded sketchy to me.

  “Oh and Alexa,” Shya stopped me before I could hang up. “Don’t be late. Kale is depending on you.”

  He ended the call before I could respond. Well that answered one question. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Fuck.”

  Arys rolled over and opened his eyes. “What did you do now?”

  I couldn’t even be offended, so I growled and punched a pillow before hurling it against the wall.

  “I made the mistake of giving a shit about the dreamwalker. I didn’t do anything though. Not really. I think Kale did something. I just don’t know what yet. Something has Shya’s panties in a twist.”

  “You underestimate the power you have over any man who is in love with you.” Arys held tight to his favorite pillow in case I planned to snatch it, too. “Clearly he intervened on your behalf.
The fool. He’s just dragging you down with him.”

  I scoffed. “If I have that much of an effect on a man, then why is Shaz so detached lately?” It was unrelated. I wasn’t sure why I said it.

  Arys put his head in my lap and gazed up at me. “Shaz is confused and afraid. And, if he didn’t love you the way he does, he wouldn’t be either of those things. He’s got to process what his role in this really is. Now,” he sat up and threw off the blankets, exposing his glorious nudity, “let’s get ready to go.”

  My gaze was riveted to him. Arys was beautiful. It was hard not to stare stupidly. “You’re coming with me?”

  “I’m not letting you go alone. That bastard demon is going to use Sinclair against you. Sorry, Alexa, but I don’t think you always see so straight when it comes to him.”

  I buried my head beneath my pillow. Hiding my burning cheeks didn’t alleviate the shameful truth. “Sometimes I really want to kick your ass.” My muffled words brought a laugh from Arys.

  “Come on, pretty wolf. Get up and get dressed. Unless you want to have a quickie first?”

  His laughter grew when I threw my pillow at his head. Smacking it aside, Arys grabbed me around the waist and pulled me against him. His skin was faintly cool but warmed at my touch. He nipped playfully at my neck, and I sighed.

  “What makes you so amazing? I mean, everything with Kale… how do you accept it like that? Like it’s so easy.”

  Arys raised his head to look at me. His expression took on an intensity that held me transfixed. “I’ve spent over a century knowing I’d likely never know you. I’ve been waiting for you for a hundred years. Being with you is surreal. We were created as one. The moments that bring jealousy and pain, they’re temporary. We are forever.”

  The weight of his words crushed the breath from me. Emotion quickly filled me to overflowing, and I had to blink back tears. Though Arys may not know it, he had just set me free from some of the chains I’d bound myself in.