A Pound of Prevention td-121

by Warren Murphy

  "I am going to stop payment on your check!" Nellie yelled after the long-gone Seasonings. Furious at wasting four hundred dollars on the washed-up girl group, she wheeled in a desperate search for alternative transportation. Only then did she see Remo, Chiun and Chief Batubizee walking toward her. Spear raised, Bubu walked protectively next to his chief.

  Nellie's bugging eyes collapsed to instant tunnel vision. The others were nothing; mere shadows. Seeing only the Luzu chief-the man whose attack had brought her to ruin-Nellie's eyes ignited beneath the mound of plastic fruit. A crazed serpent's hiss issued from deep within her ample bosom. "You!" she exclaimed.

  And like a bull from a gate, she charged.

  Long nails were talons. Bared white teeth were angry fangs as she raced across the helipad toward Batubizee.

  Bubu sprang out to hurl his spear. Remo held his arm.

  "Watch and learn, kid," he suggested quietly. The young native's worried eyes darted to Chiun. The Master of Sinanju had faded back, allowing Nellie a clear shot at the chief.

  Batubizee stood motionless, raising himself to his full height. For the first time, Remo glimpsed the dignity of the ghosts who had built the Luzu Empire.

  Nellie's head was tipped so that she could rip out Batubizee's throat with her chomping teeth. Growling, she was about to clamp down on his Adam's apple when a big fist lashed out.

  Batubizee punched Nellie solidly in the chest just above her massive bouncing breasts. The wind whooshed from her lungs, and the former first lady of East Africa dropped backward onto her ample padded rump.

  When the chief reached two clutching paws for her throat, a bony hand restrained him.

  "In due time," the Master of Sinanju said softly. Nellie scurried from broad bottom to dimpled knees. Her rage collapsed once more to panic. "You have to get me out of here!" she begged. Her demented eyes were pleading as she looked at each of the four men above her.

  That she would beg for help from the men who had led the attack on her party was evidence enough that there was more here than met the eye.

  "Okay, Carmen Miranda," Remo said, his tone wary. "Why the big rush to leave?"

  "I will tell you on board your helicopter," she promised. "Where is it? We must hurry!" Unblinking eyes darted in search of an invisible helicopter.

  "Will I be as upset as you're gonna be when you find out our pilot took off on us?" Remo asked. Nellie's shriek sent sleeping birds a mile away fluttering into the dark sky.

  "I'd say that's an 8.5 on the yes scale." Remo nodded to the others.

  Nellie pushed herself upright on thick ankles. "A car will not get us far enough," she said, her mind reeling.

  "Far enough from what?" the Master of Sinanju demanded.

  She wheeled on him. "There is a nuclear bomb planted in a cave near here!" she cried. A plastic banana fell in front of her eye. She tore it loose, flinging it away. It landed near a pair of hollowedout Seasonings bellies.

  "Not Deferens again," Remo groused. "What, did he plan on blowing up the whole continent?"

  "What are you talking about?" Nellie spit. "Deferens had nothing to do with this."

  "Then everyone in this dingdong country made the same deal, 'cause we just spent half the night defusing six bombs Elvis and Gamera planted around Bachsburg."

  Nellie was trying to wrap her brain around what he was saying. "Camorra?" she asked. "But I made a deal with Don Giovani of the Sicilian Mafia to destroy this village. He and I were the only two meant to escape."

  "I guess there's no such thing as an original plot," Remo said, "because that's just what he had in mind."

  Confusion turned to cold rage. "I will kill him," Nellie menaced. She grabbed Remo by the arm. "Come, we will take your car. Do you have a spare tire? Oh, and we'll need to stop somewhere for gas."

  She tried marching back across the helipad, but before she could take a single step a broad hand swept in, slapping her on one fat cheek. Nellie Mandobar's fruit hat sailed off as she fell to the ground, clutching her face in pain.

  Chief Batubizee towered above her, rage painted large on his moon face.

  "Where is this bomb, woman!" the chief bellowed.

  Bruised flesh stinging, she cowered from the Luzu leader.

  There was nothing she could do. Her only hope of escape was with these men. When she spoke, her voice was small.

  "I will show you," Nellie Mandobar said.

  Chapter 38

  Even in its heyday four decades ago, the mine had yielded few diamonds. Several scraps of rotted lumber and some comoded chunks of metal were all that remained beside the scrub-lined path that led up to the black cave mouth.

  "It was close enough to obliterate the village but far enough away to escape detection," Nellie Mandobar explained as they hiked up to the cave opening. Her dark face was slick with sweat.

  Remo, Chiun, Bubu and Chief Batubizee accompanied her. Coming up behind them all were three hundred Luzu warriors.

  The stars above were starting to fade.

  "How far in is it?" Remo asked as he eyed the lightening sky.

  "Perhaps a hundred yards," she replied.

  "Does it use the same code as the others?" Chiun asked.

  Nellie scrunched up her face. "I do not know," she said. "Probably not. I acquired it several years ago from an East African scientist just before the program was disbanded. If Deferens got his afterward, he could have changed the code."

  "Where's the scientist?" Remo asked.

  Nellie pointed sheepishly to a dense thicket. Sticking out from beneath the wild shrubs were two charred legs that ended in a pair of burned boots. They appeared to have been there for some time.

  "Have you ever met anyone you didn't set fire to?" Remo asked, disgusted. He continued before she could answer. "Can you shut it off?"

  "He only showed me how to arm it," Nellie replied. "I did not think I would have to disarm it."

  "Great," Remo muttered. He turned to the Master of Sinanju. "What do you think, Little Father?"

  "For the future of our House, I would ordinarily insist you find a safe haven while I deal with the boom," Chiun said. "But since neither of us could flee in time, we will go in together."

  Chief Batubizee and Bubu stepped forward. "We will accompany you, as well," the Luzu leader insisted. "If I am to meet my ancestors this day, I will do so while laughing in the face of the beast."

  "I won't ask if you mean Nellie or the nuke," Remo muttered. "The rest of you fellas stay here," he called to the Luzu army. "And if you see a really bright flash, run like hell."

  Propelling Mrs. Mandobar before them, the small group entered the black cave opening.

  INSIDE WAS LIKE an abandoned Western gold mine. Ancient wooden support beams ran up to the rock roof where overburdened lintels strained to keep the ceiling in place.

  At the cave mouth, Nellie found a bag with flashlights and other supplies she had left during her earlier visits. She and Bubu each took one. The washed-out white beams cast eerie shadows far down the man-made shaft.

  "This way," the former first lady said. She led them far down the tunnel.

  About seventy yards in, an alcove opened up on their right. Although it was short, Remo got a sudden sense of vast emptiness beyond, as if the world collapsed into nothingness at the end of the small side tunnel.

  Peering through the darkness, he saw the opening of another tunnel in the rock face at the far end of the alcove.

  "What's that?" he asked.

  "Nuk wrote of them in his accounts," Chiun supplied. "They are passages without end. Nuk thought they led to the Great Void."

  The thought, as well as the sense of infinite emptiness from the tunnel, gave Remo a chill.

  "The geologists from Bachsburg call them kimberlites," Bubu whispered in explanation. His flashlight beam found the opening. "They occur naturally. Some are many miles deep."

  The native's beam aimed forward once more, and they continued down their own tunnel. Eventually, the flashlight beams fell
across the by now familiar shape of an East African nuclear warhead.

  Remo and Chiun stooped to examine the bomb. The flashing red timer was set for 5:00 a.m. An hour and a half away.

  "Wanna start ripping wires out?" Remo asked Chiun.

  "Given your inability to screw in a lightbulb without first consulting General Electric, it would not be my first choice," the Master of Sinanju replied.

  Remo looked to Nellie Mandobar. She licked her broad lips. "I would not try it," she said anxiously. Chiun studied the bomb casing. He ran a hand along the stainless steel, as if measuring its circumference.

  "Okay, who's for making Broom Hilda here eat this thing?" Remo asked. He raised his own hand to drum up enthusiasm.

  "She cannot eat it," Chiun said, stroking his beard thoughtfully.

  When Remo met his teacher's gaze, silent communication explained his meaning. The younger Master of Sinanju nodded, taking up the thread.

  "It'd have to be pretty deep," he warned.

  "Did you sense a bottom?" Chiun offered.

  "This would all have to come down, too," Remo said, waving a finger to the ceiling. It was Chiun's turn to nod.

  "All right, we've got a plan," Remo announced. Reaching out, he slapped his hands on either side of the nuclear device, lifting it from the mine floor as if it were papier-mache.

  Bomb in hand, Remo and Chiun led Mrs. Mandobar and the natives back to the alcove where the kimberlite opened up. He balanced the warhead on the rocky edge of the deep shaft. Holding the bomb in place, he turned to Batubizee and Bubu.

  "You two had better scram," he warned.

  Chief Batubizee hesitated. "Master of Sinanju?"

  "Go," Chiun nodded. "If the end comes, you should be with your people."

  With a final questioning look at Remo, Bubu reluctantly trailed his chief down the tunnel. When Nellie Mandobar started after them, Chiun restrained her.

  "Hold, evil one," he said, his voice steady.

  "Hold?" Nellie frowned. "Hold what? I am getting out of here."

  In the yellow glow of her flashlight, Remo's smile was demon sent. "Lady, you couldn't be more wrong."

  With a push, he dumped the bomb down the kimberlite. It disappeared inside the smothering blackness. As the nuclear device began its endless tumble through space, Remo spun to the former first lady of East Africa.

  "Night-night, Margaret Dumont."

  Her flabby face was just knotting in confusion when Remo reached out and tapped the center of her forehead. Nellie Mandobar's crazed eyes rolled back in her head, and she collapsed to the rock floor.

  They left her unconscious in the kimberlite alcove.

  Racing out into the main tunnel, Remo and Chiun flew down a few dozen feet. Each Master of Sinanju took a position on either side of the main path next to one of the support columns. A sharp nod and two tight fists shot out simultaneously.

  The rotten wooden columns splintered at the center, bringing down the lintel above, as well as much of the cave roof. When the rock ceiling collapsed, Remo and Chiun were already gone.

  They ran up the tunnel side by side, their legs harmonious blurs. Every time they passed another set of columns, hands shot out, pounding wood.

  Walls and ceiling shook as if clutched in an angry fist. Even the floor seemed to buck as they raced through the rising hail of dust and stone.

  Ahead, a stab of washed-out gray. A hint of starlight.

  Running faster. Legs invisible, arms flashing, smashing columns to splinters of creosote-soaked wood. The dust cloud racing ahead, obliterating the cave entrance. A final rumble. Rocks collapsing above them.

  A final surge propelled them through the storm and out the cave mouth. They sprang into the fresh warm air. Behind them, the cave vomited a massive burst of dust at the sky.

  At the appearance of Remo and Chiun, a cheer went up from the assembly of Luzu warriors. Faces beaming pure joy, Bubu and Chief Batubizee broke from the crowd, running over to the two Masters of Sinanju.

  "Master Chiun!" Batubizee whooped.

  "Master Remo!" Bubu cried at the same time. Remo held off an embrace from the young native. "Before you bust out the champagne, maybe we should put some distance between us and that," he suggested, nodding back to the tumble of rocks that obscured the old cave mouth.

  The Luzus nodded. With Remo and Chiun in the lead, the triumphant natives marched down the hill, leaving the dust and rocks of the collapsed cave to settle on the final resting place of both Nellie Mandobar and her twisted scheme.

  Chapter 39

  The explosion came in the wee hours of the morning, at the time when Nellie's party would have been winding down. Remo and Chiun alone felt the gentle rumble of earth. They sat on rocks near the dusty well in the middle of the Luzu village. All around, natives danced and sang. To Remo, what appeared to be a Luzu conga line pranced past for the millionth time. He was called to join but declined.

  "Don't they ever get tired?" Remo asked.

  The celebration had begun at their victorious return. Although dawn had long started to streak the sky pink, the party showed no sign of stopping.

  "They have had little to celebrate for many years," the Master of Sinanju replied simply,

  "I suppose." Remo nodded. The soft rumbling beneath their feet began to slow. It faded to a shuddering stop. "Looks like that shaft was deep enough to hold the blast. You think Nellie's awake by now?"

  Chiun raised his shoulders indifferently. "Assuming the tunnel where we left her did not collapse, too."

  "With any luck, she's sucking on radioactive dust and digging like mad," Remo commented with satisfaction.

  Chiun was deeply unconcerned. He watched a dancing figure across the square.

  Bubu was swaying in place, his arms waving in time with a rhythm that was being tapped out on a primitive drum. Remo was again impressed by the native's innate grace.

  Chief Batubizee stood near the younger man. The Luzu leader was smiling and clapping. Around Bubu a dozen Luzu women watched him dance with giggling glee.

  "What's with the belle of the ball?" Remo asked, nodding to the young native.

  "As eldest son of the chief, Bubu has his choice of consorts," the Master of Sinanju explained. Remo's head snapped around. "Bubu is Batubizee's kid?"

  Chiun inspected his pupil's face. "Are you embarrassed now for making sport of his name?" Remo considered. "Not really," he admitted. "I'm just surprised no one mentioned it."

  The Master of Sinanju leaned close. "Do you realize, Remo, that you saved the life of the chief's son?"

  "What, in Bachsburg?" Remo shook his head "He was fine. I just pulled him out of the sewer."

  Chiun pitched his voice low. "Do not allow silly modesty to ruin what is potentially a good thing," he said craftily. "You are now a hero to these people. For Bubu will one day succeed his father as ruler of all the Luzu. And if nothing else, the lesson of Nuk teaches us that the potential payday from the Luzu can be great indeed."

  A faint smile crossed the face of the younger Master of Sinanju.

  "Did I say something humorous?" Chiun asked.

  "No, Little Father. It's just that I feel kind of good. You know, by helping Bubu I sort of helped their future." He waved an arm, encompassing the entire Luzu nation. "I was worried about saving the whole world before, but maybe I just need to save a little piece of it every now and then."

  As he spoke, he fished absently in his pocket. He studied the carved face of the stone figure the small Korean boy had given him.

  His thoughts were on the future. On his future.

  "May I see that?"

  Chiun's hushed voice shook him from his reverie. When Remo looked up, the harsh lines of his teacher's face were smooth.

  "You seemed spooked by it before," Remo said, handing it over.

  As he studied the figure, a hint of an unfamiliar emotion passed across the old man's weathered face. "Surprised, that is all," Chiun replied softly. "I have not seen a carving like this in many years."
>
  "You've seen one before?" Remo asked, surprised.

  Chiun nodded. "I have many of them stored in a chest in the Master's House in Sinanju. I have not looked at them in a long, long time." His voice grew faraway. "My son Song used to carve them with his nails for the children of the village." The old man had taken years to tell Remo about Song, his son and first pupil who had died in training. And in that moment, Remo understood the true identity of the Master Who Never Was.

  "I thought you said Song was almost nine when he died," Remo said quietly. "The boy I saw couldn't have been older than six."

  When Chiun looked up, there was flitting sadness in his hazel eyes. But when he beheld the deeply sympathetic face of his pupil, his smile returned. "The Void reflects your true self," he explained. "My son who died was younger than his years because I tried to force him to grow up too quickly. It gladdens me to know that, in death, he is enjoying the childhood that I in my stubbornness would not permit him to have." He started to hand the figure back.

  Remo shook his head. "You should keep it," he insisted.

  But the old Korean shook his head. "I told you, I have others. This was a gift from my son in flesh to my son in spirit. Treasure always this gift from your brother, Remo."

  He pressed the small stone into Remo's palm. Nodding, Remo replaced it in his pocket.

  For a moment, he took out baby Karen's crucifix. A small rectangle of yellow paper fluttered to the ground.

  As he studied the cross, the world suddenly seemed less cruel than it had just a few short days before. With but a ghost of lingering sadness, he started to put the cross away. Before he could, there came a gasp beside him.

  "What is that?" the Master of Sinanju demanded. Remo braced himself, preparing for the usual carping about his latent Christianity.

  "It's just a cross, Little Father," Remo said.

  "Not that pagan idol," Chiun spit. "That. "

  An accusing finger pointed to the piece of paper lying in the dirt. Remo gathered it up.

  "Oh," he said. "It's my check from Deferens for the Batubizee hit."

  "You accepted a check?" Chiun gasped. "A mere promise of payment? Remo, tear out my heart that I might not feel the agony of the knife you have driven into it." He pressed a hand against his chest.