Memories of the Past

by Carole Mortimer

  She had known, the moment she first saw him in the nursery doorway, that she had fallen irrevocably in love with Caleb Jones!

  * * *

  ‘Love, wouldn’t it help to talk about it?’ her father prompted gently.

  She had stopped crying now, just felt completely numb, sitting on the edge of her bed, her face as white as the sheets she sat on.

  She was too numbed to talk, her emotions a vacuum.

  ‘Helen?’ he prompted again, his arms about her shoulders, looking at her with worried concern.

  She shook her head. ‘It’s—it’s too awful.’ She swallowed hard, the nausea having got worse, not better.

  ‘Tell me.’

  She still couldn’t talk about that awful scene at Cal’s house, didn’t even know how she had got home or up to her bedroom. She had just wanted to be alone with her pain.

  Her father had followed her up the stairs, had sat beside her with worried concern while she cried as if she would never stop. But she had to stop eventually and when she did her father was still there, waiting to be of what comfort to her that he could.

  She loved Cal.

  It was fact, indisputable; she had known it the moment she’d realised he was standing in the doorway looking at her in Daniel’s arms.

  And he didn’t even want her in the same house as him, had just wanted her away from him as quickly as possible.

  She couldn’t tell her father about that, couldn’t bear him to know of Cal’s disgust with her.

  ‘It might help to talk about it,’ her father encouraged.

  The old, well-worn platitude. As if it ever really did help in a situation like this. It couldn’t make Cal’s disgust with her go away.

  ‘No,’ she said flatly.

  ‘Helen—’ He broke off as the doorbell rang. ‘Damn,’ he muttered as he stood up. ‘I’ll be back as soon as I can,’ he promised concernedly.

  If that was Daniel come to gloat because he had managed to ruin her life once again she didn’t think she would be answerable for the consequences!

  She could hear the door being opened, the murmur of voices, the door closing again, then silence.

  At least it wasn’t Daniel—it couldn’t have been or her father would have been more heated than he had been.

  She turned back into her bedroom, her movements heavy with despair.

  ‘Helen.’

  She turned sharply at the sound of Cal’s voice. What did he want? Had he come here to tell her exactly what he thought of her and her past association with Daniel? But it hadn’t been what he thought it was! Not that that would make much difference, she had still deceived him about not knowing Daniel at all.

  He looked at her closely. ‘Your father said you’re upset.’

  ‘I—’ She swallowed hard. ‘I’m all right now,’ she lied; she didn’t think she would ever be all right again.

  ‘I’m sorry all that, at the house, had to happen,’ Cal sighed.

  ‘So am I.’ She nodded.

  How could she have ever thought she disliked this man? How could she ever have mistrusted him? He was now more dear to her, more important than anything else in her life had ever been. And it was too late. Just too damned late.

  ‘Scott is a very unpleasant man,’ Cal said with distaste. ‘I don’t know how I could ever have been fooled by him for a moment.’ He shook his head with self-disgust.

  ‘Nor I,’ Helen said heavily.

  ‘I doubt either of us will ever see him again,’ Cal told her with satisfaction, his expression grim. ‘I made my opinion of him pretty clear after you had gone.’

  She moistened dry lips, nodding. ‘I see.’

  Had he come here to do the same to her? She didn’t think she could bear it, even if the attack was perfectly justifiable, if he was to tell her exactly what he thought of her too!

  ‘Helen, I know all that was—unpleasant, for you, but it’s over now. There’s no use upsetting yourself about it any more,’ he calmed gently.

  She swallowed hard. ‘I couldn’t believe it when I discovered he was the man you had taken on.’

  ‘No,’ Cal grimaced. ‘It must have been a shock for you.’

  Helen looked at him with pained green eyes. ‘I don’t know what he told you about our relationship in the past but I can assure you I wanted nothing more to do with him once I realised how underhand his dealings were.’ She had to at least disabuse him of that point.

  ‘He tried to tell a different tale.’ Cal nodded. ‘But I wasn’t going to fall for that.’

  ‘You weren’t?’ She looked at him in sudden hope.

  ‘Of course not,’ he denied contemptuously. ‘I know you, Helen, you aren’t that sort of person at all. Lord, woman,’ a sudden thought seemed to have occurred to him, ‘you didn’t think I actually believed the man, did you?’

  ‘You seemed—um—you didn’t want me near you,’ she reminded shakily, remembering the pain of that moment.

  ‘I wanted you away from there before I began to pull Scott apart limb from limb!’ he corrected incredulously. ‘You didn’t really believe I asked you to leave because I couldn’t bear you near me?’ he gasped disbelievingly. ‘Oh, Helen, I’ve never wanted to hold you more, to be with you more; I missed you like hell while I was away. But I had to deal with Scott, and if he had said much more about you while you had to stand there listening to the lies I would have hit him then and there!’

  ‘You would?’ she gasped.

  ‘I would,’ he confirmed teasingly, crossing the room to her side.

  Helen looked up at him with wide eyes. ‘How do you know they were lies?’

  Cal gave her a reproving look. ‘I’m not even going to acknowledge the stupidity of that question by answering it,’ he dismissed firmly.

  ‘But—’

  ‘Helen, all the way back from London today I was thinking about kissing you.’ His gaze on her lips was almost like a caress. ‘Nothing else, just kissing you.’

  Her breath seemed caught in her throat. ‘Cal—’

  ‘Nothing else, Helen,’ he repeated, his arms closing firmly about her. ‘Not Sam. Not the estate. Not work. Just kissing you.’

  She didn’t want to argue with that, just wanted to be in his arms, returning that kiss he seemed to want so badly. It didn’t seem possible, after what she had believed earlier, but if Cal said it was so then it was.

  ‘Please—kiss me,’ she groaned her own need, her body curved into his.

  They were both desperate for the contact, their days apart, plus that awful scene earlier, having heightened their need of each other. The kiss went on and on, neither wanting it to end.

  Cal finally pulled back with a husky laugh. ‘This had better stop, or we’ll have David coming upstairs to break us apart.’

  Helen shakily returned his smile, knowing that if he hadn’t stopped then she wouldn’t have cared whether her father had interrupted them or not. Although he was probably consumed with curiosity as he waited downstairs!

  ‘I love you, Helen,’ Cal told her gruffly.

  She swallowed hard. ‘But—you hardly know me,’ she said breathlessly, hardly able to believe this was happening to her.

  ‘All the details can wait,’ he dismissed indulgently. ‘I love you, the person I know you to be, the woman who allowed Sam into her life despite the pain it caused you.’ They sat down on the bed, Cal’s arm about her shoulder. ‘I knew from the very first moment I realised you were David’s daughter how deeply being with Sam affected you. Just as I knew I wanted you in my life,’ he added softly.

  ‘I was rude and arrogant at our first meeting,’ she said disbelievingly.

  ‘With good reason,’ he defended. ‘I still get the shakes when I think of what might have happened. And I know that it was just as traumatic for you.’

  Oh, it had been. The whole incident could have had tragic consequences.

  ‘I do love you, Helen,’ Cal turned to her intensely, instantly banishing the memory of that near disaster when they ha
d first met. ‘I love you and I want to marry you. If you’ll have me.’

  ‘What?’ she gasped.

  ‘I want you as my wife, Helen,’ he told her deeply. ‘If you could learn to love me. Hell, even if you can’t love me,’ he added desperately. ‘We could have a good life together, Helen. And you do respond to me, that’s enough to be going on with.’

  She drew in a steadying breath. ‘If this is for Sam’s sake—’

  ‘It’s for my sake,’ he cut in with impatient anger. ‘Haven’t you listened to a word I’ve been saying? I love you; I want to marry you. I’ve lived thirty-nine years without feeling the emotion; give me the credit of being able to recognise it when it at last comes into my life! And yes, it would be nice for Sam to have a mother figure in his life, but it isn’t going to be the end of the world if he doesn’t. I don’t want to marry you for Sam, I want to marry you because, quite honestly, the thought of having to live without you now is a desperate one!’

  She had to believe him, could see the naked pain in those dark blue eyes. ‘I love you too,’ she choked. ‘I didn’t want to—’

  ‘I would never have guessed that!’ Cal murmured affectionately.

  ‘It hurts too much to love, Cal.’ She swallowed hard.

  ‘But it gives much more than it takes away,’ he encouraged eagerly. ‘Yes, we’ll argue. Yes, we’ll probably hurt each other. But at the end of all that we’ll still have each other and the love we feel for each other. I still can’t believe you feel the same way I do!’ He shook his head dazedly.

  How could she not have loved this man? She had been sure to lose this battle from the first, and should have realised that. But if she had she would never have gone near him, and the thought now of living without this burning excitement of loving him and being loved in return was a devastating one.

  ‘Daddy planned for this to happen, you know,’ she felt bound to say.

  ‘I knew that,’ Cal nodded ruefully. ‘And at first his matchmaking amused me. I had no intention of buying Cherry Trees from him until he brought the subject up—’

  ‘Oh, I realise that.’ She sighed at her father’s duplicity.

  ‘But I only had to meet you the once to decide his matchmaking was a good idea.’ He grinned. ‘There’s nothing like having a father’s approval before you’ve even met the lady concerned!’

  ‘He’s incorrigible!’ Her cheeks were flushed with embarrassment. ‘If I had known what he was up to in the beginning I never would have come down here.’

  ‘And that would have been a tragedy,’ Cal said heavily.

  Yes, it would. But even so… ‘You do realise that he’ll be interfering like this for the rest of our lives,’ she cautioned.

  ‘“Rest of our lives”?’ Cal looked at her with a burning hunger in his eyes.

  Her heart beat a wild tattoo in her chest, her pulse racing. ‘I never thought I would say this to anyone,’ she could barely speak now for nerves, ‘but I would love to marry you.’

  ‘I have a ready-made family,’ he pointed out reluctantly. ‘Not many women would want to take that on.’ He looked at her anxiously.

  Helen gave a choked laugh. ‘I would want to marry you if you had half a dozen children already—as long as they were all as adorable as Sam!’

  His arms tightened about her, his face buried in her hair. ‘Our children will be as adorable as Sam. More so probably, with the beautiful mother they are going to have.’

  Their children.

  Even in her wildest imaginings that was something she had never dreamt of.

  * * *

  ‘Shh, you have to be very quiet.’ She could hear Cal whispering to Sam, smiling dreamily to herself as she pictured them creeping into the room so that they shouldn’t disturb her.

  She opened one eye in the semi-darkness, watching them as they crossed the room to her bedside, the tall strong man and the sturdy three-year-old at his side.

  Sam had grown a lot the last two years, looking even more like Cal as he matured, taking on a lot of his uncle’s characteristics too as he copied the man he adored.

  He peered now over the side of the crib that stood at Helen’s bedside, frowning deeply. ‘She’s very small, Uncle Cal.’

  Cal gave a throaty laugh, ruffling the little boy’s hair. ‘You were that small once, Sam.’

  Sam gave him a scoffing look that clearly doubted that, before turning back to the crib. ‘I can’t see her properly; is she pretty?’

  ‘Not as pretty as her mother—’

  ‘Flattery will get you everywhere, Cal Jones.’ Helen laughed softly as she sat up in the bed and switched on the bedside lamp, blushing at the unashamed adoration in Cal’s eyes as he looked down at her.

  In the early hours of that morning they had shared the experience of seeing their daughter come into the world, her thick blonde hair the same colour as her mother’s, the eyes looking as if they would stay the deep blue of her father’s. No couple could share a more beautiful moment than seeing their child born.

  ‘We didn’t wake you?’ Cal leant down to brush his lips against her, his gaze full of tenderness.

  She shook her head. ‘I was only dozing. So what do you think of her, Sam?’ she prompted teasingly.

  He gave the baby a considering look as she lay so peacefully asleep, long dark lashes fanned out across her peachy cream cheeks; after all the warnings she had had of babies looking all red and wrinkled, little Elizabeth was the most beautiful baby Helen could ever have imagined.

  ‘I thought I’d be able to play with her,’ he voiced his main disappointment.

  ‘You will, when she’s older.’ Helen gave Cal a conspiratorial smile before turning her attention back on the little boy. ‘I did try to explain that to you, Sam, before she was born.’

  ‘Yes.’ But he sounded as if he had hoped she might be mistaken about it, and now that he had seen the baby his worst fears had been confirmed.

  Cal laughed softly, swinging Sam up into his arms, looking nothing at all like a man who had spent most of the night holding Helen’s hand through the labour of birth, euphoria making him look years younger. ‘She’ll get bigger, Sam,’ he consoled the little boy.

  Sam didn’t look very convinced about that, but now that he had seen how boring the baby was going to be he decided he would explore Helen’s hospital room, asking to be put down before wandering off.

  Cal sat on the side of the bed. ‘How are you feeling?’ Concern for her darkened his eyes.

  ‘Wonderful!’ she assured him warmly, clasping his hand in hers.

  ‘David can hardly wait to see her,’ Cal told her ruefully. ‘He should be along later.’

  She smiled indulgently, knowing how pleased her father would be that they had named the baby after her mother.

  The last two years had been the happiest Helen had ever known, happiness beyond her imagining. As Cal had predicted, they did have their arguments, but the making up had always been worth it!

  And now they had a daughter to complete their happiness; Sam was already like a son to them both, so Elizabeth had been like a completion of their family unit.

  Helen sat up with a smile as the baby began to stir, wondering what Sam was going to make of her feeding the baby herself.

  Cal bent down to pick the baby up, the hard planes of his face softened with tenderness for his little daughter. ‘I’m not going to stand a chance with two of you in the house,’ he said ruefully, placing the baby in her waiting arms. ‘Sam and I will have to try very hard to resist the pair of you!’

  Helen touched the tiny hand that lay so trustingly against her breast, her eyes full of unshed tears as she looked at Cal. ‘I love you very much, my darling. Thank you so much for loving me.’

  ‘Thank you,’ he said gruffly, as moved by the moment as she was.

  Sam climbed up on the bed with them, watching the baby with more interest now.

  As she looked at her family all around her Helen knew she had never known a moment of such sheer happine
ss before. She didn’t doubt for a single second that the happiness would continue…

  * * * * *

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  CAROLE MORTIMER,

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  SECRETS OF A BILLIONAIRE’S MISTRESS

  One Night With Consequences

  When one night…leads to pregnancy!

  Waitress Darcy Denton isn’t Renzo Sabatini’s type. But unworldly Darcy becomes addicted to their passionate nights. And then she discovers she’s pregnant! Darcy dare not tell Renzo. But it’s only a matter of months before he claims what’s his…

  Read on to get a glimpse of

  SECRETS OF A BILLIONAIRE’S MISTRESS

  CHAPTER ONE

  RENZO SABATINI WAS unbuttoning his shirt when the doorbell rang. He felt the beat of expectation. The familiar tug of heat to his groin. He was half tempted to pull the shirt from his shoulders so Darcy could slide her fingers over his skin, closely followed by those inventive lips of hers. The soft lick of her tongue could help him forget what lay ahead. He thought about Tuscany and the closing of a chapter. About the way some memories could still be raw even when so many years had passed and maybe that was why he never really stopped to think about them.

  But why concentrate on darkness when Darcy was all sunshine and light? And why rush at sex when they had the whole night ahead—a smorgasbord of sensuality which he could enjoy at his leisure with his latest and most unexpected lover? A woman who demanded nothing other than that he satisfy her—something which was easy since he had only to touch her pale skin to grow so hard that it hurt. His mouth dried. Four months in and he was as bewitched by her as he had been from the start.