Star_Lee Johnson_To Be Great Series

by Blue Saffire

  “No, I can’t.”

  “Please, where are you?” he demanded.

  “I’m not doing this.”

  “Crystal, where are you?”

  I hung up the phone and got into my car. I wasn’t going to be any good to anyone today. I called my assistant and cancelled my whole day. I was going home to sleep the entire nightmare off.

  I got home and showered, put on a t-shirt, and curled up into my bed. The moment my head hit the pillow, I knew that was a mistake. My sheets smelled just like him.

  I balled up in the middle of the bed and started to cry. I cried for at least two hours when it registered that someone had started to ring the doorbell.

  I wished they would go away. The few people that knew I lived here would only stand there and tell me, I could have told you so. I didn’t need to hear that crap.

  Whoever it was wouldn’t go away. I knew I should’ve pulled into the garage. Seeing my car in the driveway had to be the reason for their persistence.

  After twenty minutes of the bell ringing, I was totally annoyed. My parents were due back this afternoon, but they would call. If it was Ricky I was going to kick his tail.

  I opened the door to see the one person I didn’t want to see. I knew picking a door with glass too high for me to see out of was going to be a problem. I went to slam it back, but he pushed his way in. He grabbed me, pulling me onto his waist. He kicked the door closed behind him. I was stunned as he marched straight for my bedroom.

  “I love you,” he breathed into my face. “If you want my baby, I’ll give you one. I can’t lose you.”

  “Lee, stop,” I sobbed. “Please, this hurts too much.”

  “It doesn’t have to. I love you, my son doesn’t change that.”

  He carried me all the way into my bedroom and laid me down on the bed. He reached down, pulling his shirt over his head. My mouth popped open when I comprehended his intention.

  He was serious. He was going to try to get me pregnant. I knew he had lost his damn mind. I turned and crawled to the far corner of the bed away from him. Grabbing a pillow, I held it to my chest like a safety guard between us.

  “You getting me pregnant doesn’t fix this,” I shouted at him.

  “Then what will, Crystal? What will show you I love you and you’re what I want?”

  “Don’t do this. Just let me get over you and move on.”

  “No, I can’t. Just like you can’t. We haven’t been together in how long? And you still love me. Let me fix this. Let me love you.”

  “It hurts,” I sobbed.

  “Come here, baby. It doesn’t have to. Let me fix it.”

  I slowly put the pillow aside, crawling back over to him. I wrapped my arms around his back and cried into his bare chest. He hugged me so tight, I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I wanted him to fix this. I wanted to try. I wouldn’t let him get me pregnant, but somehow we would find a way.

  Climbing onto my bed and puling me onto his chest, he let me sob for hours while he rubbed my back. I ignored my ringing phone and the outside world, allowing him to make it better. Just having his arms around me was a start. He didn’t say a word and he didn’t have to.

  I don’t remember when, but at some point I fell asleep. When I woke Lee was still holding me, but he was knocked out. He looked so peaceful. That turned my thoughts to something he’d said. He hadn’t slept in months. Football season was back on. He couldn’t function like that.

  It also nagged at me that he did look thinner. Lee didn’t look like he was taking care of himself. That worried me. I wasn’t sure if he needed sleep or food more. He was sound asleep so I got up to make him something to eat for when he woke up.

  I already had meat down in the refrigerator to make myself some spaghetti. I cooked that up quickly and hunted through the freezer for some vegetables. I made some green beans, which were his favorite. I decided to also make some corn on the cob. I wanted to have as much food on his plate as I could.

  He woke up like clockwork. I’d just finished up when he came out of the bedroom stretching and yawning. I smiled at him, pointing to the table for him to take a seat. He smiled rubbing his stomach, taking the seat closest to him as he moved to the table. I took a huge plate of food over to him. I had even made him some garlic bread.

  He pulled me to him to kiss me soundly on the lips. Warmth spread through me reminding of how simple things used to be. I missed that simplicity.

  “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome, baby. Can I ask you something?”

  “Yeah,” he answered after blessing his plate and starting to tuck in.

  “You look thin. Is your chef not taking care of you?”

  He snorted at me, but continued to eat. My brows knotted at his response.

  “True story. Rachael made Manny quit. I’ve been living off takeout and junk food, when I don’t crash at Corey or Brantley’s.”

  “You’re kidding, right?”

  A deep frown consumed my face. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. The look on Lee’s face said he was containing his own rage.

  “You think I’m kidding. I told you I don’t sleep. I’m too stressed to sleep.”

  “I don’t understand. How are you supposed to play like this?”

  “I don’t want to talk about that,” he grumbled.

  “What about school? Did you finish?”

  I wanted to know what else was lacking since I left his life. This was pure insanity. Lee was on track to do amazing things when we were together. I couldn’t even wrap my head around this.

  “Yeah, I finished. I just haven’t done anything else.”

  “Baby, if it’s that bad you can stay here. At least, until you figure things out,” I offered.

  “Are you sure? You don’t know how much I need that. I’ve been looking at places. My mom just doesn’t want me to leave Rachael in my condo. She made me have Rachael send all her mail to a PO Box. She told me not to give her a key either. I pay the doormen to let her in and out. That right there be causing me to lose sleep. You know Larry and Fred are cool, but I don’t like the idea that I got to trust them with the keys to my crib.”

  He looked stressed out with every word he spoke. My head was spinning. This was too much.

  “Yeah, I’m sure,” I answered placing my hand on his face. I could even see the weight loss there. “Eat up so you can shower and get some more sleep.”

  I still knew his schedule. I was sure he had practice the next day. I wanted him to get some real rest. He didn’t have to worry about me. I was going to take care of him. I was one less thing he didn’t have to worry about.

  Chapter 19

  A Plan

  Lee woke up the next morning to a huge breakfast. I made him French toast, eggs, sausage, turkey bacon, a half a grapefruit and a huge glass of apple juice. He looked so happy. I had a full day ahead of me, but he needed to be taken care of first.

  I tried to wrap up my day early so I could get home to let him in and get dinner started. When I pulled into the driveway I found Lee fast asleep in his car. I felt so bad, I didn’t want to wake him but he needed to get into the bed.

  The unnatural way he was curled up was crazy for a man his size. Even being in a bigger car now, an E350, instead of his Porsche, it looked ridiculous. It was only about three in the afternoon, but he looked like he could use a few more hours or just call it a day to sleep his way through the night.

  “Baby,” I called tapping on his driver’s side window as I peer through the glass.

  The moment those brown eyes opened slowly my heart squeezed in my chest. Lee is just a beautiful man. There was no arguing about it, I didn’t want anyone else’s opinion. I knew what the man did to me. I was under his spell before he even knew. The first time I saw him I stopped in my tracks and forgot what the hell I was doing.

  He clearly looked confused at first. It took a moment for his eyes to focus before he looked around him while straightening in his seat. He opened to door and slowl
y unfolded his large frame from the vehicle. My insides warmed as he towered over me. I loved the feeling of being engulfed in his presence. His all-consuming aura wrapped me in a sense of safety.

  He kissed the top of my head, while pulling me into a bear hug. Wrapping my arms around him felt like returning home after the worst week ever. We stood there for a moment before he led me to the back of his car.

  I’d be lying if I said I didn’t get excited when he pulled his luggage out of the trunk. I helped him make his way into the house, holding his small laptop bag. When we pushed our way inside he seemed to wake up a bit, pulling me to the couch with him to relax.

  Once we were seated he placed his face into my belly taking a deep breath. I felt his entire body relax as I began to I rub his head. Those silky waves smooth to the touch, always fresh and spinning.

  “What’s going on with your barbershop?” I quizzed.

  Last we were together he talked of opening a barbershop. Not a unisex place like mine and his friend’s. He wanted a place just for men. I understood that. It was his wheelhouse. He wanted a sporty lounge type of feel in his place.

  “I don’t have time for that. I haven’t been focused on it. I would love to have it poppin’ right now. Something else for me to do.” He sighed, tiredly.

  “I have an idea. I’m looking at my next location, it’s a five unit storefront. The owner is selling them separately, but I want them all and I think I can get a great price. You can look at it. If you like the place, you can put in the percentage for the unit and I’ll give you the deed on it,” I offered.

  I had been thinking about him and his goals all day. He had undeniably lost focus. I could see that light missing from his eyes.

  “For real, I’m real interested in that,” he lifted his face, his eyes locked with mine as they glowed anew.

  “Are you too tired? I can see if we can look at it tonight.”

  “No, I’m ready.”

  It was obvious he’d caught his second wind. I could feel the excited energy coming off of him. He was absolutely wide-awake now.

  “Okay, I’ll call my agent and see if I can get an appointment for tonight.”

  I picked up my phone to make the call. As I dialed his phone started to ring. I watched as he looked at the phone, a scowl appearing on his handsome face. I knew exactly who it was, I didn’t have to think twice or ask. He answered his phone, grumbling into it through tight lips.

  “Hello, Jamie,” I called into my phone as my realtor answered.

  “Hey Crystal, how can I help you today?” she sang back to me.

  “I want to show that multi-unit to a potential partner. Can we see it today?” Lee waved his hand at me. “Oh, wait, Jamie.”

  “I have to go get my son,” Lee grumbled.

  “So you want to go tomorrow?” I asked.

  “No, I just need two hours. Give me the address, I’ll meet you there.”

  “Okay,” I nodded at him. “Jamie can we meet in two hours?”

  “Sure honey, you know the place. We’ll meet in two hours,” Jamie chimed.

  I hung up the phone. Lee’s jaw was clenched so tight I thought it would break. I didn’t want to pry into his business with Rachael, but he looked so upset. I waited to see if he would tell me on his own.

  “It won’t take me long,” he grumbled.

  “Okay, do we need to be done by a certain time to get him back to his mom?”

  He snorted, making a sour face. The look of disgust was tangible, I could almost taste something sour in my own mouth. I tried to push that down and listen without judging.

  “Nah, she said she has an emergency, which means she ain’t coming back for a few days. Ain’t nothing new.”

  “Oh.”

  My head whipped back. That little boy hadn’t turned one yet. To think that his mother would disappear like she didn’t have him to take care of turned my stomach, but again I tamped down my thoughts and emotions. I had to set myself some boundaries here.

  “Let me go get my little man. I’ll meet you in two hours,” he stood up, bending to kiss me before he left.

  Panic seized me. I don’t have anything in my house for a baby. Where would he sleep? He needed toys, food, and pampers. I had none of that.

  I called Kim right away. I knew she had babysat for Lee a few times. She would know what I needed. I had a room for him. My house had four bedrooms and the one right next to mine just happened to be empty. It’s the other two rooms that were still acting as storage until I found time to unpack.

  “Hey girl,” Kim answered her phone.

  “Kim, I need your help,” I rushed.

  “Everything okay?” she asked nervously.

  “Yeah, It’s just, Lee has to keep the baby. I don’t have baby things here. Can you and Kenny meet me at Babies Station? I need Kenny’s truck and maybe your car. I don’t have long.”

  “We’re on it. Text me the one you’re on your way to and we’ll be there,” she chimed through the phone.

  “Okay, thank you so much.”

  I grabbed my bag and ran out to the car. I texted her the address as I rushed to get there. I needed so much. I gunned my way to the store as fast as I could.

  I picked a location in between my house and Kim and Kenny. I stopped only to run into the hardware store to make Lee a copy of my house keys and an extra set to give to Kim and Kenny so they could take the things to my place for me, while I met up with Lee. When I arrived at Baby Station they were in the lot waiting for me.

  “Hey Ma,” Kenny called as I rushed out of the car.

  “Hey guys, thank you so much. I need a crib, baby tub, swing. Oh my gosh, I need everything.”

  “Calm down, Crystal. We’ll take care of little man,” Kim soothed.

  I took a deep breath, grabbing a cart while motioning for them both to do the same. I moved as fast as I could. I had baby detergent, body wash, lotion, wash clothes, bottles, a sterilizer, I even picked up locks for the cabinets for when he got bigger.

  When I was done with the small stuff, we went to look for a crib. I picked a gorgeous crib and I had to have the rocker to match. I could just see Lee with his son in his arms, rocking him to sleep. Lee seemed so good with him.

  I got the matching changing table and dressers. I wanted him to have a full room. I bought clothes, a swing, and tons of toys. It was crazy how much we had. I looked at my watch and groaned. I was running late. We rushed to the counter. I grumbled to myself as I prayed the girl at the register would wake up and move faster.

  My phone started to ring just as I swiped my card to pay. I knew it was Lee. I hoped the baby wasn’t fussy because he had to sit in the car waiting for me.

  “Hey, baby,” I called into the phone.

  “Hey, is everything okay?” he asked nervously.

  “Yeah, I just needed to take care of something. I’m on my way right now.”

  “Okay, don’t rush. Take your time,” he said with concern.

  “I’ll be fine. See you in a few.”

  I hung up the phone and started to push my cart out. I tried to help get the things in the cars. We had so much.

  “Oh no,” I whined. “We got everything but baby food. Crap.”

  “Relax, we got this. Go meet Lee. Kim can watch little man later while y’all hit the grocery store. You got those keys for us,” Kenny said holding out his hand.

  “Okay, here,” I nodded, reaching in my bag for the key and handing it over. “His room is the second bedroom on the left.”

  “His room,” Kim squealed.

  I rolled my eyes, but turned to run and jump in my car. I raced off to meet Lee, sending Jamie a text to tell her I was on the way. It took me about twenty minutes to get to them. I felt so bad they had to wait so long, especially the baby. I parked in the first spot I could find.

  Jumping out of the car, I rushed over to Jamie. She knows I’m never late. Thank goodness she still looked happy to see me. She knows she’s in for a commission so I’m sure she would’ve
waited two more hours.

  “Hey, Jamie,” I chimed as I kissed her on each cheek.

  “Hey honey, you look great as usual,” Jaime chimed back.

  “You too girl.”

  “Hey,” Lee said as he walked up with his son in his arms. He watched my face closely, searching my reaction.

  “Hey,” I said, lifting on my toes to kiss him on the cheek. “Jamie, this is Lee. Lee, this is Jamie.”

  “Nice to meet you, Lee.”

  “Nice to meet you, too.”

  I looked at Lee’s son as he rested against his father’s shoulder. I felt a small tug in my chest. I don’t know what possessed me to speak the next words that came out of my mouth.

  “Can I hold him?” I asked.

  Lee looked surprised at my request, but handed the baby over. He came right to me. Boy, he was a solid baby. I shifted his weight so I could have a good hold on him.

  Jamie led us to the first unit on the corner. I was excited. I seriously wanted this property, it had so much potential. Lee smiled as we walked, his hand on my back. Little Lee babbled in my arms as he played with the necklace around my neck. It was a gift from his father to me. A diamond heart pendant that I still wore every day. We walked into the first unit and I looked up at Lee. His face lit up as he took it all in.

  “I want to make this a beauty supply. It can supply the salon and the barber shop,” I explained.

  “I can see that. Raise a platform there for the register, the hair extensions over there, the products and extras running up that way,” he mused.

  “Exactly,” I grinned. Lee described exactly what I had envisioned. “The storage room is huge. Go take a look. I don’t want to take the baby back there.”

  Jamie took Lee back to the storage room while giving him details on square footage. I stood with the baby swaying back and forth. He was such a quiet baby.

  I looked down to find it was because he’d fallen asleep against my chest looking just like Lee. I closed my eyes to take a minute to deal with who’s child I was holding. A tear escaped, but I quickly wiped it away.