Duly Noted

by H. M. Shander

  Nate said nothing as she folded herself into his arms. He rocked her and held her tight, giving her back a gentle rub from time to time.

  Minutes later, she pulled out of his warm embrace. The apartment remained silent, Cole MacIntyre had yet to return. She glanced towards the door.

  “Do you think he’ll come back?”

  “Hell if I know,” she said, lowering her head. Breathing deeply, she steadied herself and stole a look at the clock. It wasn’t as late as she expected. It was only two. She shook her head – it had felt like hours.

  Nate seemed to have read her mind. “You weren’t out that long. And you were responsive.”

  “What?”

  “Well, when you passed out, I worried. So I called the pharmacy listed on your pills and explained. They suggested I try to get a response out of you, so I shook you a little. You told me to fuck off, so they suspected you’d be okay. But if you didn’t wake soon, to call 911. Then your dad showed up, and knew you’d be okay. So we waited, and talked.”

  As her tired fingers rubbed against her temples, her eyes closed. She exhaled. “I didn’t sleep much last night, so I’m sure that had a lot to do with it.” Their eyes locked together.

  He raised an eyebrow. “Really? Not buying it.”

  She curled her lips. “No really. I had a lot on my mind.” Like Matthew, you and everyone else. “I know what you’re thinking.”

  “This should be interesting.” He stretched out on the couch, and folded his arms over his chest. “Go ahead.”

  “I’m not a drug addict.” Her stance defiant, her tone outraged.

  “Okay.”

  “I’m not, because that would make me a criminal.”

  “How so?”

  “Because it would.”

  He laughed. “Good thing you’re not a lawyer. That defence holds no water.”

  “Well, I’m not a drug addict.”

  “If you say so. I don’t believe it.”

  She slumped onto the couch. “I need them.”

  “Sometimes, yes you do.” He raised an eyebrow. “So it makes moving forward tricky.”

  “It does.” She lowered her head into her hands, breathing deeply. She wasn’t an addict. The pills helped her survive the pain or anxiety. They helped her, and she only ever used them when she needed them. It’s not like she took them whenever she wanted, there was always a good reason. Every single time. So, she wasn’t addicted to them, right? And why should he care so much? What was it to him? She looked over to him, still dressed in his work gear. “Why are you here?”

  “I’ve already answered that.”

  “No,” she said, positioning herself better to see him. All of him. “I mean, why did you follow me home? We broke up.” Her eyes narrowed and posture stiffened.

  “Seriously?” Nate’s laughter warmed her soul, until he stopped. “We didn’t break up.” There was truth in his eyes, and the twinkle in his eyes made him so adorably cute.

  “Yes, we did. I kicked you out.”

  “So what? That didn’t mean we broke up.” His shoulders drooped as he leaned closer towards her. “Is that what you thought?”

  “No,” she lied. So now that means I didn’t have a one-night stand with Matthew, it means I cheated on Nate. I’m a terrible person. Standing, she limped around the living room.

  “Did you never fight with your other boyfriends?”

  “Daily,” she rolled her eyes as she answered.

  “Aww, that’s cute.”

  “What?”

  “You thought we broke up because you closed a door in my face.” A chuckle rumbled out of him. “Look, I’ve had more doors slammed in my face than I care to admit. It doesn’t mean much, except that the person on the other side is fairly pissed off.” He walked over to her and wrapped an arm around her waist. “And I get that you were upset. But really, if I thought we had broken up, would I have followed you home today?”

  She shook her head. “Obviously not.”

  “So there you go. I care about you.” He planted his lips, those perfectly soft lips, on hers. The kiss so intoxicating it caused her to forget everything. It was better than any drug she’d used. And she loved it.

  Chapter Nineteen

  They stopped kissing and came up for air.

  “I want to talk to you about something.” Nate held her hand and led her back to the couch. “I was chatting with your dad while you were passed out.”

  She shifted, suddenly uncomfortable with where the conversation was headed. Nothing good ever came out of I was chatting with your dad. She swallowed. “Yes.”

  “And I asked his opinion. I told him what I was doing with you, I mean, with the car and stuff. How we’re taking it slow and I’m trying to get you comfortable with cars again.” His hands twisted together.

  She stared at him as anger surged within her. How dare he share that with her father? That was between them, wasn’t it?

  “So, I asked him about this magic pill you used when you moved.” Unable to believe what she heard, she covered her ears. Warm hands pulled hers away and squeezed them. “I want you to meet my family on Saturday. And in order for that to happen, I need to drive you there. It’s a forty-five minute drive away.” Her mouth fell open. “So I asked if it was possible to get one of those pills.”

  The muscles in her face tightened, and she struggled to find her voice. “Let me get this straight. You think I have a drug problem and yet, you want me to take more drugs so I can see your family? I’m confused.”

  He bit his lip. “So am I. Conflicted really.” His head tilted to the side as he shrugged. “I honestly think there’s some kind of abuse going on.” A loud gasp escaped from her open mouth. “However, and this is where it gets weird, I want you to meet my family. I know the only way right now for that to be possible is to give you this magic pill your dad mentioned. So I feel like I’m enabling you, when really I should be helping you.”

  “But–” She had nothing. No comeback. No thoughts. Nothing. Even her expression was blank.

  “I get it. It’s completely selfish on my part.” A pause while he hung his head, and his thumb stroked her knuckles. “But I don’t know how else to get you to meet them.”

  A quick check of her surroundings told her she could seat a few people in comfortably. Four at the table, a couple on the couch, one on the sofa chair. There shouldn’t be any issue rounding up a few more stools from somewhere. “Have them come here. I don’t mind.”

  “They wouldn’t all fit.”

  She screwed up her face. “How big is your family?”

  He smiled. “My immediate family is small. Just the seven of us. But my extended family is much bigger.” He gave her hand a quick squeeze.

  “How big?”

  “Big.”

  Running her fingers through her hair, she gave it a tousle. “This meeting, when would it be? In a month or so?” At least with a goal, she’d work harder, although, it would be impossible for her to be riding in a car in thirty days. Maybe by Christmas? He could wait seven months right? Did she need to meet his whole family so soon?

  “I was hoping this weekend.” Brown eyes searched hers. “It’s my birthday on Saturday.”

  Saturday? SATURDAY!! As in five days from now? Pill or no pill, that was asking a lot. “That’s bigger than a baby step.”

  “I know.” The gap between them swallowed up as he moved closer. “Would you think about it? For me?”

  So she shut her eyes to block out the cute little grin playing on his lips. She needed to think, dammit, and that sweet dimple made it easier to give in. And she didn’t want to. Shit. She needed to figure this out. This would be huge for him, more so for her. She’d be getting into a car. With him. To meet his family. And that seemed super fast, even though it was for his birthday. She was speechless.

  “I can see the wheels turning in your head. Tell me what you’re thinking.”

  “Fuck me,” she whispered.

  He laughed. “Always about the
sex.”

  This time, she raised an eyebrow. “Not what I meant.”

  The smile fell. “I know.” He lowered himself to the floor, so he kneeled before her. “It’s so much to ask.” Rubbing her knees, he whispered, “Let’s make a deal. You do this for me, and I’ll do something for you.”

  Hmmm, this is interesting. “It would have to be something big. Because you’re asking me to take a pill that’s essentially a date-rape drug, and drive me out to the middle of God knows where to meet a family of strangers. That’s a lot of trust to dispense.”

  “You don’t trust me?”

  Ouch. His pained expression spoke volumes. “Obviously, especially after today,” she whispered.

  “So what would you like from me?”

  “Anything?” She gave him a subtle wink.

  “Anything.”

  She squeezed his hand and after kissing it, placed it over top of her breast. She hoped her racing heart beat hard against his hand. “I want–” Why was this so hard to say? She’d had no issues insinuating it before. “I want–” She breathed. “You.”

  His swallow was audible.

  Chapter Twenty

  “I… umm…” He swallowed again and took a deep breath. “That is a big step.”

  She pulled his head close and kissed his lips while holding his hand to her breast. “It’s what I want.”

  “I know. You’re like a little horndog.” His laughter was music to her ears.

  “Fucking right.” She smirked. “So, what do you say? I agree to take the fucking little pill and be surrounded by strangers in a foreign place, and you agree to make love to me.”

  He nodded as he tensed. “When? That night?”

  “No. I want to remember it because I’m sure it’ll be magical.” She kissed him again. “But soon after.”

  He let out a breath and a moment of worry flashed in his eyes. Kisses trailed over her neck, and slowly his hand moved up along her backbone. Over her shoulder. Down her arm.

  It fired up little synapses everywhere he touched her, igniting her passion in a way Matthew didn’t. The sensations felt good – right, wholesome and pure through to her soul, which warmed and tingled the longer he stroked her arm. “I don’t know if I can wait until after your birthday.”

  “You’ll have to try.” His voice was smoky and soothing.

  “Fuck that,” she said, pushing him down, so he lay on the couch. She straddled him and started to unhook his Carhardts when the unmistakable sound of a door clicked against the strike plate.

  “Aurora,” her daddy said, agitation strong in his voice.

  “Sonofabitch,” she muttered and climbed off Nate.

  But Daddy wasn’t looking at her, he glared in Nate’s direction. Assessing him. Thoroughly. And poor Nate, his face turned the most brilliant shade of crimson.

  A quick glance in his direction said it all. Daddy was still pissed, but yet his eyes wore concern, and the longer he stared at her, the softer his features became. He turned to Nate. “I thought about what you asked me and I want to show you what it does and how it works.” He faced Aurora. “Has Nate discussed with you about this weekend?”

  Heart beating hard wondering how this would end, she nodded. “Yes, we just finished our negotiations.”

  Confusion crossed his face, but he shook his head. “But before I have the final say–”

  “You get the final say? Shouldn’t I?”

  “No. Because you don’t know how you act while you’re on it. I want Nate to understand,” and his eyes narrowed in Nate’s direction, “how this works.” He pointed a finger at him. “And if you try any funny business while she’s on it, I’ll hunt you down like a dog. You have my word.”

  “Yes, sir.” If she didn’t know better, she’d swear he was shaking beside her.

  Cole rubbed his chin as contemplation crossed his face while he mumbled. “A perc and pseudoephedrine five hours ago, plus the Isas…” Shaking his head, he studied her, looking her up and down. “How are you feeling, Princess?”

  Confused by the out of the blue question, she stumbled. “Fine, I guess.”

  “Headaches? Nausea? Dizziness?” She shook her head as her eyes widened, understanding why he asked. “I think we should be okay for a demo. Are you willing to try a small dose tonight?”

  A gulp. She reached for Nate’s hand and searched his face. “Are you willing to see this? You’re supposed to be at work still.”

  He turned to her, holding her hand close. “I’ve taken care of it. Do you want to do this, tonight?”

  Another swallow. She’d be meeting his family. His mother. On his birthday. Putting her whole trust into him. Obviously, he proved he was trustworthy. He could’ve packed her in his car and sped away with her, but he didn’t. Instead, he took care of her. Her head hung in shame as she realized she trusted him more than she trusted herself. “If it makes it so I can meet your family.” She shrugged. “Wait? What will they think when I arrive and I’m loopy?”

  “You don’t get loopy,” her daddy said. “More distant than anything else.”

  “What will they think?” Her eyes held Nate’s face.

  Nate stroked her hand. “I’ll prepare them, although they already know about your fear.”

  What the fuck? Seriously? Does he tell everyone?

  “I promise, they’ll be gentle.”

  She sighed. “Okay. Let’s do this. Let’s show Nate how this works.”

  Her daddy pulled a small plastic bag from his pocket. “These are propranolols. We call them Isas. They’re fast-acting. Each pill will give you about an hour.”

  “But I thought they lasted longer than that?” Aurora asked as her eyes widened.

  He gave her the sideways glance. “You take more for the longer trips.” He turned his full attention to Nate. “It takes about six or seven minutes to kick in. It’s like flying.” Her dad chuckled, and it made the hairs stand up on the back of her neck. “Its peak effectiveness is roughly forty minutes though. Six to seven minutes before you hit cruising speed, and about five minutes to landing.”

  “Okay.” Nate’s brow furrowed in deep concentration.

  “So, monitor your time well, Nate. You don’t want to be on the receiving end of it wearing off before arrival. Trust me on this.” From the corner of his eye, she caught his look.

  What? I don’t remember anything like that.

  “I will.” Nate nodded and draped an arm over her shoulders.

  “For tonight, I’ll cut the pill in half. It may not be as effective, but you’ll get the idea.”

  “May I add,” Aurora spoke up, her voice dripping in sarcasm, “how much I love being a science experiment for you two?”

  Her daddy walked into the kitchen and brandishing the sharpest knife he could find, expertly broke the tiny pill into two. Holding half, he passed part of it to Aurora.

  “Right now?”

  “Please,” her daddy said.

  As she had before, she placed it under her tongue and waited.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Aurora slowly started to realise what was going on. It always took a while to exit out of the fog. Tonight was no different.

  A rush of adrenaline followed as the sounds registered first. Glasses tinked, hushed voices beyond her, and speakers that played terrible music. Focus on the voices. Who’s here? Her breathing came faster and shallower, a normal reaction to ‘waking up’ in a strange place. The smells hit next – nearby coffee, something spicy in the air, and fresh bread close enough to taste. A quick jump in her heart rate. Finally, the vision returned. As she blinked around, everything became clearer.

  Nate sat to her left, her daddy across the booth from her. Both chatted animatedly as if she wasn’t there. She was, but she really wasn’t. If she had been part of the conversation, surely she’d remember. What had we been talking about? But that was the trick of the pill, wasn’t it? No memory. And coming out of it always left her feeling like a ghost which made her insecure.


  “How can you not be an Oilers fan?” her father asked Nate, who shrugged.

  “Not big into hockey, really. Never had time.”

  Aurora stared at them both. “Hey,” she whispered. They kept on chatting. Surely, she hadn’t been comatose, and they hadn’t grown deaf in the past few minutes. “Hey,” she said.

  They stopped and turned in her direction. Nate spoke first. “Hey.”

  “How’s my Princess?”

  “I’m fine, Daddy.” They were discussing hockey. YES! I remember. “It’s wearing off.” A smile formed on her lips as she turned to Nate. “Not an Oilers fan, eh? Well, guess tonight’s going to be our last date.”

  Nate laughed as Cole shrugged. “Welcome back,” her daddy said.

  “Did I pass the science lesson? Everything okay?” She wanted Nate to answer more than her daddy.

  Dammit, her daddy spoke up first. “Yes, Nate understands.” Added as an afterthought, “Clearly.”

  “Yeah.” Nate gave her hand a little squeeze. “Considering how you reacted when you tried to sit in the car, this was a walk in the park. I think we’ll be just fine on Saturday.”

  She squeezed his hand back. “Good. I’m glad. I hate taking that pill, but it sure does the job.” Heat flashed and flamed through her cheeks. “I didn’t say anything, you know, out of the ordinary?”

  A scolding voice from across the table said, “It’s not a truth serum, Princess. It’s a beta-blocker.”

  Oh good. I’ve never had anything to hide before, and I didn’t want the whole Matthew bit to come out. “Whew,” she said. “So, what’s everyone having?”

  The restaurant they dined at was more than a thirty-minute walk back home, so once again, Aurora took the other half of the pill for the return trip. When she rolled out of another fog, she was safely home in her apartment. Nate sat at the kitchen table, with Cole holding a beer and offering one to Nate.