by Owner
“What about grandmother’s birthday?”
“Have you spoken to the doctor about taking her out?” he asks. His tone is so apathetic I picture him lounging in the fluffy, white hotel robe sipping champagne and eating strawberries.
“He doesn’t think it’s a good idea. She’s been very weak lately. It could take too great a toll on her. But Rose and Jax are adamant. I would feel so much better about this whole thing if you two were here.”
“Don’t worry. We’ll be there. Even if mother has to pop over to Chicago after this, at least I’ll be there.”
“Chicago?” My face flushes with heat, my heart racing. “You’ve got to be kidding me, Dad.” This anger is not only about Rose, but I’ll make my point with it anyway. “When she’s done, maybe she could swing by So Cal for the funeral.” I fight back the tears that threaten to flood my eyes. “Tell mother to pencil in two weeks from today, and I’ll see if grandmother would mind being accommodating!” My voice rises louder than I meant to. I swing back around the door to find Christine standing in front of me.
“Sage?” my dad says with the first hint of emotion I’ve heard in years.
“I’m sorry, Dad. I’ll have to call you back.” I hang up without waiting for his response.
“Christine.” I dab the corner of my eye before setting the phone down. “I’m…that was my father. Sorry about that. Did you need something from me?”
She pulls back a chair, sitting on the edge. “We need to talk about a few things.”
I nod, glance around my desk hoping I didn’t leave anything out that makes me appear incompetent.
“Look,” she says folding her bony fingers in her lap. “You’ve had a lot on your plate lately. Things have been a bit stressful around here and for you personally.”
When she pauses, I ask, “Are you unhappy with my work? Have I done something?”
“No. In fact, I spoke with Mr. Klein this morning, and he’s recommending we work with several of his associates, so you may have even more reason to visit that man of yours in San Diego. And then you can save those tears for him where they belong.”
I steel myself, hoping she doesn’t see that I’m embarrassed she caught me teary-eyed at work. That alone is a strike against me. “Ned and I are not together,” I say, too annoyed to keep up that bullshit story any longer.
“Oh, too bad. He had a nice little ass.” One corner of her mouth turns up for a millisecond before she pulls it back into place. “So anyway, one of the reasons I came in here is because my transfer came through. I’m going to be working in the New York offices.
This catches me off guard because Christine has been wanting a transfer for more than a year. I figured it was never going to happen. For some reason my first consideration is of her sleazy husband. “What about David’s business?”
“David can take his dry-wall business and shove it up his ass.”
My eyes grow wide as I wrestle with a smile. “What?”
“He’s not coming with me. I’m filing for divorce. You think I don’t know he’s felt more asses than a proctologist? Why do I keep saying the word ‘ass’? It’s on my mind, I guess. Because I’m kickin’ ass and going to New York!” She raises a finger, watching for me to join in on her enthusiasm. I don’t. “Anyway, I put up with it for too long,” she says, growing serious.
“I’m sorry, Christine.”
“I’m not. It’s a relief.” She waves a hand across her face flicking a chunk of hair back in the process. It makes me consider how I ended up surrounded by so many people who don’t give a crap about anything. Then my mind goes to my friends, and I know that I’m wrong.
“So your position here?” I ask.
“Right, that’s what I wanted to ask you about. If you want that promotion, getting my position is a good first step. Of course, I’ll highly recommend you.”
All of this coming from Christine is unexpected. The praise, the acknowledgment for my efforts, is all coming too late. “Thank you, Christine. But I don’t think so.” I surprise both of us with these words.
“What do you mean? I thought you wanted to work on the big accounts? Ultra-high net worth, working with the big boys.”
“I thought I wanted that too. But this thing with my grandmother. It’s really opened my eyes. Made me see there’s much more to life than money.”
“There is?” she says in mock surprise. When I don’t respond, she says, “I’m kidding, of course. I hope this doesn’t mean you’ll be leaving.”
“No. I’m not insane. I still have bills to pay. But I think I’ll be happy to continue with the middle-class clientele. The people that put family first and money second.”
“It suits you well.” For the first time in months, Christine shows me a genuine smile. She stands, heads for the door. Before leaving she says, “I take back what I said a minute ago.”
“What’s that?”
“I am sorry,” she says. My brow furrows along with a head shake. “David,” she says. “I’m sorry about the Christmas party.” Then she walks out.
●●●
A day later I walk into Jax’s house to battle out plans for grandmother’s birthday and to see Travis. We’ve made quite a charity-finding team for grandmother’s money, but I’m ending this friends crap once and for all. He wants more; I can sense it. He must be waiting for me to make the first move. I’m sure losing everything and hitting rock bottom rips all of your confidence away. But I’ve got just the thing for a guy needing a confidence booster.
Travis opens the door wearing basketball shorts, a thin tank top, and a bucket of sweat that deters me from hugging him. “Hi,” he says.
“Eww, what have you been doing?”
He offers me his gorgeous smile that makes me forget the sweat. “Working out. Can’t afford a gym membership so I do what I can here. Want some coffee? Something else to drink?”
I follow him in, slightly nervous about my plans. I worry I might be rushing things. “I’ll grab a water. Want one?”
“Sure.”
As I walk to the kitchen, I can’t take my eyes off him. He removes his shirt, then rubs a towel down his face and across his chest. Need some help with that?
Two minutes later we’re sitting on the couch, his shirt securely back in place. I understand now, what goes through a man’s mind when he’s thinking about when and if he should make his first move. “Where is everyone?”
“Jax went to the store. Brady had class. So it’s just you and me.”
“Oh.” Silence fills the space between us. I hear a lawn mower down the street. My mouth and throat become dry. I’ve never backed away from a challenge. I turn my body toward him, bend one leg up on the couch. Maybe I won’t have to be the first one. I just need to put the sign out to see if he’s buying. I run my fingers through pieces of my hair, pull them forward, releasing them to fall across my chest. His eyes study mine, his expression growing interested. “So what have you got for me?” he says.
“Um.” I lean forward, my eyes travel to his mouth.
“You haven’t changed your mind have you?” he asks.
My eyes flit away. I sit up straighter. “What?”
“About New Beginnings. You talked to Rose about it, and you’ve got lots of places that money can do good for.”
Light bulb. “Oh. No, of course not. Everything’s already been set up to send a check. I would have thought you heard about that.”
“No, I hadn’t.” He puts his hand on mine and the butterflies in my stomach party like it’s 1999. “I want to thank you for that,” he says. “It’s really incredible of you.”
“I can’t take credit for this, Travis,” I say, disappointed for more than one reason. I turn my head to look over the couch, out the window. “It never would have happened if it weren’t for my grandmother. So you can thank her.”
“I will,” he says. Then he takes hold of my chin, turns my head back to him. “But I’m still thanking you because you did make it happen.” His eyes t
ake hold of mine and every nerve in my body comes alive. We both want this. I lean forward, touch my lips to his, put my arm around his neck, pulling him closer, waiting for his lips to respond. When they do, my skin catches fire. His mouth takes over mine. A second later, his hand pulls mine from around his neck. What is happening? He backs away, staring down at the space between us. “Sage, no, we can’t do this.”
“Why, what’s wrong?”
“We’re just friends, remember? That’s what we agreed to.”
“You make it sound like we signed a damn contract.” I try to stay calm, but he’s avoiding eye contact. “Will you look at me, please?”
He gazes up, and I take his hand in mine. He needs reassurance. He told me in the beginning he had nothing to offer me, but he was dead wrong. “Travis, it’s okay. I don’t care about your past or that you don’t have money or a real job. You’re a good man, and you’re getting your life together. I have faith in you.”
“I know. I appreciate you saying that, but it’s not that.”
If it’s not that, I have another idea. I’m determined to convince him. “I trust you, Travis. I know you won’t hurt me. That’s what you’re worried about, isn’t it? That I’ll get hurt?”
He slips his hands away from my grasp. “No, actually, it’s not. I’m worried that I will. You’re the one who’s dangerous, Sage. You’re the one who can hurt me.”
I’m completely stunned, frozen, when the door opens. Jax stands there, holding two bags. I stare blankly at her, wondering why the hell Travis would say this to me. “Hey,” she says.
Travis jumps up from the couch. “I’m going for a run.” He pushes past Jax and is out the door before either of us can say anything.
I follow Jax to the kitchen where she sets the bags down on the counter. “Did I interrupt something?” she asks, giving my body the once over.
“Unfortunately, no. In fact it was the complete opposite.”
“What do you mean?” She pulls out a diet of B’s—bread, bananas, beer—and sets them on the counter. Then a box of Teddy Grahams cookies. I shoot her a determined stare to which she replies, “They’re Brady’s favorite.”
“How sweet. I wish I knew what Travis’s favorite was. Guess he’s not interested in my sweet treats.” I grab the cookies and tear into them.
“Go easy on those. Brady’ll be home soon.”
“Aren’t you the little mommy,” I say, shoving a handful in my mouth. They’re not bad.
“Can we get the focus back on you? You’re not saying that the always desirable Sage got turned down.”
“That’s exactly what I’m freaking saying.”
Jax finishes putting the rest of the food away, opens two iced teas, and hands me one. We sit at the table while I unload on her. The past couple of months, the stuff with my parents, my eggs, and finally Travis. As much as Travis was a pleasantly strong shoulder to lean on, I’d missed talking to her, one of my best girls who understands me. Since I’d found out about my grandmother’s money, things hadn’t been the same between us. But I don’t have enough time or friends to hold a grudge. And Jax has never let me down before, so I feel even worse that I didn’t give her the benefit of the doubt.
She tells me Travis probably needs more time. I can’t explain what he said to me or how I’d be the one to hurt him. And Jax doesn’t want to get in the middle of this, so she says she can’t talk to him. I respect her decision. In fact, these last few weeks have made me see more than ever things from Jax’s point of view. All the time I was pressuring her to be more like me or Emily, we should have been working to be more like her. “Jax, I’m so sorry about how I’ve acted lately. The stuff with my grandmother and bugging you about that job.”
“Hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to say anything more.”
“Thank you. So will you help me give away some of this money?” Saying that still makes me cringe a little. “I’m not done spending yet.”
“Sure, but…”
“What is it?”
“Do you think your dad would still help me get a job?”
My mouth drops open. “You’re kidding.”
“I’m not. No regrets, and I’m not changing my life. Only my job. I need something new.”
I agree to talk to my father once again about helping Jax find something. Then we hug, laugh, and marvel at how complicated life has grown since we met twenty years ago, thankful we still have each other. We make plans for grandmother’s birthday—a short dinner party at Jax’s bar. She convinced her boss to give us the place for two hours. Then she gives me some great leads for places to donate money, but I’m still trying to find that one place that will have special meaning to me. I need to figure it out and tell Rose about it before it’s too late. I believe it’s the one thing that means the most to her and will make her happy.
An hour later, Jax and I are still in the same spot. Travis comes through the door, panting, wiping sweat from his forehead. He doesn’t even glance our way before heading straight for the bathroom. Trepidation and sadness pour over me as I realize I probably made a huge mistake. I wanted so badly to be with him, and now I may have lost his friendship as well.
CHAPTER 28 - JAX
It’s three days before Rose’s birthday party—something I pushed for but am now not sure is the right thing. I haven’t been sure of a lot of things lately. The past few days I’ve had this feeling in the pit of my stomach, gnawing away at me like a disease. The problem is I can’t pin down the cause with all the drama in my life. Last night, I sat outside, gazed up at the stars, hoping for a sign. I thought about Ned, who’s been trying so hard to make up for his deception. After Taco Tuesday, he stalked me at Oak Grove, the bar, and left a note on my car while I was at the tattoo shop. My heart misses what could’ve been with Ned. I miss him and Emily. She’s been avoiding me, and I don’t blame her. She can barely make it through some days, dealing with her own issues. But at least I know I’ve forgiven my friends and they deserve to know that too.
Then my mind went to Rose and Sage and Travis. I even thought about Dale, only because he happened to call me while I was star gazing. Valerie left him once again, sending him to me for comfort I’m not equipped to give. The sting of tears filled my eyes as I pondered life and the night sky, realizing I was never going to find the answers in a star. Then, as I stood, wiping my tears with the back of my sleeve, a shooting star flashed across the sky. My face lit up, and I shouted “My sign!” to the universe. But as I walked back toward the house, I stopped, doubled over with laughter. A sign for what? I had no idea what my sign meant.
Now with a clearer head and a morning cup of coffee in my belly, I work in the backroom, doing the books for my boss, Matthew. This laptop is ancient and slow, so everything takes twice as long. Hours later, his bald head and towering shadow block my light when he draws up behind me. “How’s it looking, girly?” His voice is scratched and deep. His arms folded high on his chest are fully inked.
“Good. Much better actually.”
“Gotta seriously thank you for that, Jax. All your changes have really made a difference. I see it every night.”
Matthew often talks to me while I’m working, so I don’t look up. “I’m glad you finally listened to me.”
“What can I say? I’m a stubborn ass.” He pulls a chair out, twirls it a half turn so it’s backwards, then he sits down.
“Stubborn, yes. Ass, no. And I know it was tough getting rid of Carla.”
“It was, but you were right. Had to be done. I owe you big time.”
“After Rose’s party, we’ll be able to call it even.”
He scratches at the stubble, peppered with gray, on his cheeks. “I don’t think so, Jax. I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”
I push the laptop aside and tap a pencil on my palm before leaning forward. “Come on, man. You’re not changing your mind about the party are you? It’s only two hours, maybe less with this crowd.”
“Calm down, girly. I’m not changing my
mind. But I want something else from you.”
My eyebrows raise. “I’m not that kind of girl, Matty. But I could find someone special for you.”
He reaches out, rubs an over-sized hand on my wrist. “Now you’re just breaking my heart.”
“Right. Seriously, what have you got on your mind?”
“Eddie’s a slacker. We both know that.”
Of all my suggestions to Matthew about the bar, I never mentioned his brother, the manager. Nice guy, but his heart has never been in the job. “You’re not shit-canning your own brother?”
“No, but I’ve got a feeling he’s on his way out. Been making a lot of trips up North to get back with his woman. He’s there now. Called me this morning asking if I could handle things this weekend without him. He’s been dropping a lot of hints lately too.”
“So you need me to pull some extra shifts?”
“I want you to hang up your mixologist hat and be my bar manager.”
This is not something I saw coming. My jaw dropping in silence tells Matthew that, so he says, “It makes all the damn sense in the world to me, Jax. You’ve got this place nailed—inside and out. Everyone respects you, and you’re a hard-ass worker. What more could I want?”
“Thanks, Matty. I’m really flattered you think that…”
“Crap if I’m not gonna hear a but come out of that sassy little mouth.”
“No, it’s just, lately I’ve been thinking about making some serious changes in my life. You know, do something…” I searched my brain for the right word. “…respectable, I don’t know, important?”
“Respectable?” He pulls a sour face like I called his only child fugly.
“I didn’t mean it like that, Matty. I love this place. It’s like my second home.”
He nods; his face lights with recognition. “Where’s this coming from then? Have anything to do with Mr. Kahkis, who keeps coming in here looking for you like a lost puppy?”
The adorable image brings a smile to my face. The flutter in my stomach tells me it’s time to settle this once and for all. “Could be. But it’s not only that. I’m at a crossroads of sorts. Things always used to be so clear to me, decisions so obvious. Now I have doubts about almost everything.”
