Renegade (Moonshine Task Force Book 1)

by Laramie Briscoe

  She nods, sniffling slightly. “Next week at the Fourth of July cookout they always have. We’ll tell them then.”

  I drag her over to me, holding her in my arms, tucking her head under my chin. “Next week.”

  And finally, I breathe a sigh of relief.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  Whitney

  “Do you like this color?” I hold up a piece of pale yellow fabric next to an off-white. “Does it wash this out?”

  “I like them together, especially for a spring or early summer wedding. When is this one?” Addison asks, grabbing the appointment book from my table.

  We’re in my kitchen today, working on some of the things we’ve unintentionally let pile up. I have a whole list I want to get through today, and Addison, bless her heart, brought me an iced decaf coffee from our local shop. We’re checking stuff off our list like nobody’s business. “I think it’s in April of next year, but I’m meeting her next week to talk about color. I want to give her some options.”

  “You’re right, it is April. Ohhhh,” she reaches over grabbing another piece of fabric. “What about the yellow and either a mint or a light blue? It’s unusual, but it could be striking with the right back drop.”

  I grab my notebook, jotting down notes. “I love that!”

  “So what are your colors gonna be when you marry Ryan?” She smirks at me over her coffee cup.

  I’m speechless for a full minute because I’m shocked and I’m not sure what to say. “We’re not getting married. We’re having a baby. Those are two very different things.”

  “If it were the fifties you’d be getting married,” she reminds me, giving me a wink.

  “Good thing we’re not in the fifties,” I retort.

  She’s quiet for a beat, then she asks another question that takes me off my game. “Do you think you’d wanna marry him someday?”

  “What the hell, Addison?”

  “We’re wedding planners, I can’t help but think about it. I mean obviously you thought enough of him to sleep with him. You haven’t been with anyone since you got divorced. Am I wrong?”

  I don’t know how to explain to her how I feel about Ryan. He’s becoming important to me in ways that don’t have anything to do with him being the father of my child. He’s showed me he’s caring and an overall good person. If I ever decided to marry someone else, he wouldn’t be a bad choice, I’m just unsure if he’d be willing to be with an older woman for the rest of his life. “I’m older than him,” I shrug.

  “Lame,” Addison throws a dish towel at me. “That is such a lame-ass cop out. Tell me how you really feel, you need to get it off your chest, Whitney. What do you truly think of Ryan?”

  No one’s ever asked me that question, and I’m not exactly sure how to answer it. “Ryan is one of the best people I’ve ever met.”

  “That’s all I’m gonna get? C’mon Whit, I know he’s been staying here. His truck is always here.”

  I wonder if people drive by and see that, I wonder if Trevor’s seen it. “I count on him more than I should,” I let the words fall from my lips. “He’s wormed his way into a part of my heart I didn’t know still existed. I thought I’d locked it away when I got divorced, but he’s gotten under my skin. I’m not saying I’m in love with him or anything like that, but I enjoy the time I spend with him. He’s going to be a great father to our child, and hopefully a good partner for me. If anything comes of it, then so be it.”

  Addison gives me a sappy look before she points at me. “Girl, you’ve got it bad. Keep tellin’ yourself all that bullshit you just told me. Sooner or later though, you’re gonna admit it. You want him, and not for the remainder of your pregnancy. You want him forever.”

  I can’t dispute what she’s saying, but at the same time I’m not going to tell her that. “Look, we’re figuring it out. Whatever it’s going to be, it will be. Stop trying to put what Ryan and I have in a box.”

  “I know you, and I know you won’t mess around forever, Whitney.”

  She’s right, but I also don’t want to discuss that with her. If I discuss it with anyone, it should be Ryan.

  Renegade

  “You coming over for mom and dad’s cookout?” Tank asks as we patrol the streets of Laurel Springs.

  “Yeah, I’m gonna stop by at least.” It’s not like I can tell him I’m going to actually be there with his sister. He’ll ask why I’m riding with her, and then I’ll have to admit what’s been going on. I know how he works.

  “I think Whit said she’s bringing a friend. She didn’t say whether it was female or male.”

  I hit him in the knee. “It’s not your business who she’s bringing.”

  “Yes, it is. What if it’s a hot chick? I could potentially get a date.”

  The snort I let out is so loud we both laugh. “Yeah right, what will Blaze say about that?”

  “Doesn’t matter,” he shrugs. “She doesn’t want to date me, she’s made that painfully obvious.”

  The tone he uses says not to ask him what he means, but I want to. He’s my friend and I can tell he’s keeping something in his vault, and not knowing what it is makes me feel like a piece of shit. Especially when I know exactly what I’m keeping in mine.

  We turn off onto a side street that connects the county with the highway, parking in an abandoned lot. This is just for show, you can see our cruiser for miles along either side east or west of us. Anyone who plans on speeding will have to make a concentrated decision to do so. Really the reason we sit here is to deter it, to try and keep the roads safer.

  “What’s been going on with you lately? I feel like you have this secret life you’re keeping from me,” Tank sets up the radar detector, calibrating it so that it can be used properly.

  “Busy more than anything, been doing my woodworking stuff. There’s a show in August. You know how much I sell when I go to the shows.”

  It hurts and sucks lying to my friend, but at least I know the lying will end in a few days. Then I’ll be lucky if he speaks to me again. The thought has crossed my mind. I don’t like it, but I’ve committed to my choices and I will stick with them, regardless if they hurt or not.

  “You do fuckin’ great at those. You should probably quit this bullshit and do that full time.”

  I’m about to make a smartass comment when a black truck screams by us so fast the only thing we see is the color.

  “Again?” Tank growls as he flips our lights on and jams his foot on the accelerator.

  Quickly I key the radio and call in our position, letting them know which vehicle we’re behind. This time I know who it is, I remember the license plate from last time, and I’m not surprised when they give us the name Merle Strather.

  “The question is, will he stop this time?” Tank takes a turn on what feels like two wheels as he asks the question.

  “Fuckin’ A man, I want to make it out of this shift alive,” I shoot him a look before I radio in again. “Dispatch, be advised we’re in excess of eighty miles an hour, out on Highway 5. Going east.

  He’s obviously headed for his grandfather’s still.

  “If he hits that still, y’all back off,” Holden’s voice comes over the line. “We need probable cause to go in there. If he yanks that fucking truck into the drive, we have our probable cause. I’m pretty sure they’ve already started a new batch.”

  Tank and I do our best to keep up with the truck. There’s something about this kid and the way he drives with such abandon. He has no regard for life, no thought to anyone else who’s on the road with him. It makes him dangerous, and I wonder for a split second what will stop him. Will it be the road itself? A wreck? A ticket? Growing up and becoming a man?

  “He’s bailing down the dirt road leading to the operation,” Tank points to the truck turning off the road.

  “Holden, he took the access road,” I radio in, waiting to hear from our commander.

  “Excellent. We’ll have orders in the next few weeks. Y’all give it up and go b
ack to patrolling.”

  I know this is a means to an end, but it bothers me that we weren’t able to give him a ticket. Any of the times we’ve pursued him and given chase, we’ve been told to suspend it or use it for other things. I feel like we’re failing the kid, letting him think it’s okay to keep going when in all honesty, he should be facing the music for what he’s doing.

  Worry gnaws at my gut. What if one day he does something he can’t take back and we could have stopped him by giving him a piece of paper? By giving him a fucking slap on the wrist and a cash fine. Sometimes it’s all people need to straighten up. With him, it feels like we’ll never know.

  “One day we’re gonna get that little piece of shit,” Tank takes a drink of his water sitting next to us in the console. “It pisses me off that he keeps getting away.”

  “Same, but we have to do what they want us to.”

  “Doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck.”

  I chuckle as I put notes on a piece of paper for our report. “I’m gonna put that in the report. It sucks that you keep making us suspend our chase. We want blood, goddamnit.”

  Tank laughs along with me. “Feel like we’re in the fucking Army again, so much regulation bullshit.”

  I quietly agree as we go back to our regular patrol. Glancing over at him, I hope like hell that we can still be friends when all this with Whitney is said and done.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

  Whitney

  “Are you nervous?”

  Ryan’s quiet as he sits in the driver seat, navigating us along the back roads to my parents’ house. They’ve lived in the split-level ranch home since I was ten years old and mom was pregnant with Trevor. Back when I was younger, mom had her own roadside vegetable stand, but she’s given it up in the last few years. Now she caters for my company on occasion when I need her to. Nearing sixty, I hope dad’s looking to retire, and I know mom’s ready to buy a beach house along the gulf.

  “You think I should be?” His tone is one of nonchalance, a man completely at ease with the choices he’s made.

  I scoot closer, grabbing his free hand with my own, and hold it in my lap. There’s just something I love when a truck has a bench seat. “Maybe. I mean, you did get me pregnant. Even if I am thirty-five, I’ll always be his little girl. Isn’t that what dads always say?”

  He looks my way, taking his gaze off the road for a split second, but I can’t see his eyes behind the aviators he’s wearing. “If we have a daughter, I’ll let you know,” he drawls out, moving his hand down to my leg, lazily stroking my thigh left bare by the shorts I’m wearing.

  “You truly aren’t nervous?”

  Now I feel like maybe I’m a freak of nature, because I am nervous. What if telling my family ruins Ryan’s relationship with Trevor? If I’m honest, that’s my biggest fear. I’ve never wanted to come in between the two of them, and every time I think about the child I’m carrying, that’s the first thought that comes to mind.

  “Princess,” he smiles slowly as he faces back towards the road. “Regardless of what they say, it’s not going to change anything about the relationship we have. At least on my end. They may be upset you’ve kept it a secret for almost four months, but if they’re the people I know they are, they’re going to be excited for you. If anything, they know how badly you’ve wanted a baby. There’s no way in hell they’re going to begrudge you something you’ve wanted this much.”

  I know he’s right, but I can’t help but feel he’s making it simpler than it really is.

  “If you’re okay then I am, too,” I nod, moving my head up and down in an affirmative action.

  He laughs, and the sound causes goose bumps to break out on my arms. God, sometimes he’s the sexiest man in the world, and I can’t believe he sleeps with me almost every night. “You keep telling yourself that, baby. It’s okay though, I believe enough for the both of us.”

  Changing the subject, I ask him another question I’ve been wondering since we left the house. “Do you think it’s okay that I wore a bikini? I mean I know you can definitely tell I’m having a baby now, but it still fit. Should I have grabbed a one piece?”

  His hand grasps mine again. “Fuck no, you looked hot when you tried it on the other day. I have a feeling you’re gonna need to show that belly off so people believe we’re actually having a baby. Otherwise they’re gonna think I’ve tricked you into lying.”

  This time I laugh, because I know if anyone knew what kind of a guy Ryan is, they would be wondering why he’s with me. He doesn’t give himself enough credit. “Maybe I tricked you,” I lift our hands up and place a kiss on his knuckles.

  Since our date, I’ve felt closer to him, feel like maybe this can be a real relationship. Like we have enough in common to have a life together. Before I was worried all this was merely a physical reaction to one another. Those never last and lie to myself as I might, I want this to last with Ryan. I just can’t voice the words to him yet, but I will, when the time is right.

  “Nah,” he shakes his head. “I went completely of my own free will as soon as you offered yourself to me on a silver platter. Nothing about that night is a regret, as is nothing since.”

  I still don’t know what I’ve done to deserve this man, but I hope every day that I don’t let my inability to express my feelings ruin it. I worry I’ll push him away by protecting myself, and I truly hope it doesn’t come down to that. “Same here,” my voice is soft as I let go of some of the tight control I keep over myself.

  We stop at the turn off to my parents and he glances over at me, a slow smile spreading across his face. “I can’t believe you actually admitted it, Princess. I’ll win you over before this is all said and done.”

  He has truly no idea how close he is to already doing it.

  * * *

  My stomach is in knots as my mom, dad, brother, Ryan, myself and two cousins sit around the table, talking after we’ve had our lunch. My two cousins will leave in a few minutes and then, as per tradition, the rest of us will swim, eat ice cream, and nap until the sun starts going down. Then we’ll make our way down to the local ballfield where we’ll sit in the back of the pickups and watch the fireworks show our town puts on. We’ve done this every year since I can remember, and I’ve always enjoyed it. Right now, though, I wish my two cousins would stay for the rest of the afternoon and into the night.

  Stop being a wuss, Whitney, I berate myself. You can’t just show up one day with a belly poking out five inches and then the next time with a baby in your arms, and expect nobody to wonder what in the world happened to you.

  “You okay?” Ryan asks as he has a seat next to me. He’s taken off his shirt and sweat runs down his body, making little rivers until they pool into the lines of his stomach. My dad convinced him and Trevor to help him get some work done while he had both the boys around. I lick my lips and then move my gaze back up to his.

  “Yeah, I’m good.”

  He offers me a smile. I’m pretty sure he knew exactly what I was looking at, exactly what my thoughts were. “Just checking.”

  It’s then that I realize my cousins are gone, and it’s only the immediate family left. But before I can open my mouth, my mom sets down some ice cream in front of us and my stomach clenches sharply. I want that ice cream like I’ve never wanted anything in my life.

  “It’s so good to have everyone around again,” she says as she doles out spoons. “It seems like forever since we’ve all been together.”

  “We’ve been busy with the task force and workin’,” Trevor glances at Ryan.

  “He’s right, Mona. They have us on OT right now.”

  I’m surprised they both got the day off, especially with it being a holiday, but I won’t question it. I’m enjoying my chocolate sauce when my mom turns her gaze on me. “Where in the world have you been child? We ain’t seen you around here in almost two months.”

  One more bite of my ice cream and I’ve fortified myself enough to tell everybody what’s been going on with
me. It’s not a secret I can continue to keep, not even one I want to keep any longer. I push away the bowl and put my hands in my lap.

  “I have something I need to tell all of you.”

  Nervously I glance at Ryan, but the ball is in my court. I’m the one who needs to tell my family what’s going on here. He gives me a nod of encouragement and then reaches over to grab my hand, entwining our fingers together.

  “What the fuck?” Trevor mumbles, his eyes going wide as his gaze locks on our entwined fingers. I can almost feel the energy coming from him, even though a table separates us.

  I shoot him a glare and then glance back at my mom and dad. “The reason I haven’t been coming around is because I haven’t been feeling all that great. A week ago, that stopped, and I’ve got more energy than I’ve had in a while.”

  “What’s wrong with you?” My dad asks, his eyes not moving from mine and Ryan’s entwined fingers.

  Ryan sits forward in his chair, moving closer so that our knees touch. I take comfort from the warmth of his skin. It gives me the courage to take a deep breath and move forward.

  “I’m pregnant,” I smile shakily. “Ryan and I are having a baby.”

  There’s silence and shock, but my mom’s hands go to her mouth and she gasps in what I think is a happy sound all before I hear the words of my brother.

  “You fucking son of a bitch,” he stands, advancing on Ryan who also stands with arms at his sides.

  Seeing the two of them standing nose-to-nose causes my stomach to turn. They’re almost matched in height; Ryan’s taller, but that’s where it ends. Where Ryan is dark Trevor is light – longer blonde hair, lighter skin, a little bit of a smaller build. I have no doubt Ryan can take my brother and shove him into the ground. He’s had a harder life, lived through more than my brother’s ever had to face. But Trevor’s got a temper and I’ve only seriously ever seen him let go of once – and that was on Stephen. Nobody knows about that night, and I’ll take it with me to my grave.