This Place Called Home: Includes Bonus Story! (Forget-Me-Not Ranch)
Page 16
“And what about Mack?” his aunt asked, her eyes sharp. “What about all the work she had already put into the nonprofit? Have you told her you sold the ranch?”
“No. I haven’t talked to her.” He’d have to call her later and tell her she was off the hook. They wouldn’t need her help with the ranch anymore. It was better that way. She wouldn’t feel obligated and he could forget all about the woman.
“You’re really going to let her go?” Agatha’s expression turned as stern as it used to when he’d talk back to her as a kid.
He avoided her eyes exactly the way he had back then. “She left.”
“I suppose it doesn’t matter at all that she loves you.” Had they been standing, his aunt would’ve put her hands on her hips, he just knew it.
Love? Mack didn’t love him. If her feelings had been that strong, she would’ve stayed. “We don’t know each other that well.”
“That doesn’t matter. She still loves you.” Agatha raised her voice. “You can try to deny it all you want but that’s the truth. Do you love her?”
When he remained silent, his aunt asked, “Could you love her?”
He could if he let himself. That was the problem. “She lives in a totally different world than I do.” Her mom had already made it clear she’d never accept him. He didn’t come from a wealthy family or drive a Mercedes. He wouldn’t want to, even if he had the means.
“When are you going to stop looking for excuses?” his aunt demanded, drawing attention from a couple at a nearby table.
“Mack left.” That had been his answer. He’d taken a month off work to spend time with her. He’d said it was to give them time to work on the nonprofit but if he was being honest, it was because he’d wanted to be with Mack.
She made him feel different. Happier, lighter. But she had gone home anyway. “I asked her to stay and she left.”
“She’s nothing like your mother, you know.” Agatha’s eyes got sad. “You want to make her into the same kind of person as your mother, but she’s not.”
Nash started to push back his chair. Time to help Agatha to her room. “I don’t want to talk about this.”
“Of course you don’t.” But she didn’t seem to care if he wanted to talk about it or not. “Now I have held my tongue, but I think having a stroke gives me permission to say whatever I damn well please.”
He supposed she had him there.
“Your mom didn’t know how to love anyone, Nash. Not you, not herself. But Mack does know how to love. She cares deeply about people, about animals. She was only trying to love her parents by going back to Denver. You can’t fault her for that.”
“No. I guess I can’t.” He hadn’t considered her motivation. He hadn’t wanted to let himself think too much about her, let alone feel anything for her. “I don’t know if I’m enough. I don’t know if I can make her happy enough that she’ll want to stay.”
“Oh, Nash.” His aunt shook her head sadly. “Mack is already a happy person. It’s not your responsibility to make someone happy. Everyone has to choose that for themselves. If you love her with your whole heart, you will be enough for her.”
He’d never given his whole heart to anything except for his work. “I’m not sure I know how to do that. How to love another person like that.”
“Then you figure it out.” His aunt stood and reached for his hand. “You can start by letting down your guard. Stop thinking so much and follow your heart for once in your life.”
He’d never had a reason to follow his heart, but it might be time to learn how.
Chapter 17
It sucked to be on the other side of the waiting.
Nash checked his phone again, in case he’d missed a call from Mack. Nothing. Since his aunt had beat him over the head with her opinions yesterday, he’d tried calling Mack three times, and so far she hadn’t called him back.
He supposed he deserved the silent treatment after the way he’d treated her when she told him she was leaving. He’d been disappointed and hurt, but those emotions had come out as anger.
He’d tried to apologize on the last message he’d left but it had turned into babbling and then the voicemail had cut him off for talking too long.
Since then, he’d distracted himself by pulling down all the old boxes out of the attic. He’d stacked them in his bedroom, pouring through the memories he hadn’t wanted to hold onto.
Like this one. Nash lifted an old framed family picture out and carefully unwrapped it. Sitting on the bed, he studied the portrait that had to have been taken right before his mom had left—one of those cheesy posed studio photographs around Christmastime, complete with fake snow.
Even in the picture, his mom hardly smiled. From what he could remember she’d had that look on her face often—like she was trying hard, but couldn’t quite find happiness.
He’d tried to make her happy. He would pick flowers for her in the meadow. He’d do the dishes without being asked. He’d saved up all his money to buy her the best birthday gifts he could find. But it hadn’t been enough.
Nothing would’ve been enough. Back then he so badly wanted the woman to be something she wasn’t. Agatha was right. His mother didn’t know how to love anyone, and that wasn’t his fault.
It didn’t mean someone else couldn’t love him either. That was hard to believe when you’d been conditioned to think otherwise, but he didn’t want to live without love. He didn’t want to live without the feelings Mack had given him.
He set the family picture back in the box and stood. There were so many boxes, and he wasn’t sure what to do with them. He could give everything away or throw it all in the trash, but that wouldn’t make the memories any less a part of him…
Jasper perked his ears. The dog had been out cold in his bed near the window, but now Jas scrambled to his feet and started to whine.
“What’s up, boy?”
The dog barked and wagged his tail before bounding out the door. Nash started to follow, but then Mack appeared in the doorframe and he couldn’t take another step. “You’re here.”
Relief coursed through him at the sight of her. She looked good—her hair down and carefree, mouth smiling shyly. Best of all, she wore cowgirl boots instead of the fancy heels like she probably wore to work. It looked like she might stay awhile.
“Of course I’m here,” she said softly. “I told you I’d be back.”
Jasper continued whining and rubbed his head against her legs.
Still smiling at Nash, Mack knelt to the floor and loved on the dog. “Jas knew I’d be back, didn’t you, boy?” Her eyes narrowed playfully in Nash’s direction. “But you didn’t believe me.”
“I was afraid to.” Nash still stood frozen, simply taking in the sight of her. She’d come back to him even though he didn’t deserve her.
Eyes locked on his, Mack stood. “Why didn’t you call me to tell me Agatha had a stroke?” Hurt laced her words. “I would’ve been here for you. I would’ve come right away.”
“I’m not used to having someone to call.” That was the plain truth. “But I should have. I should’ve believed you when you said you’d come back. I’m sorry I didn’t. Old habits die hard, I guess.”
“Yes, they do.” She walked to his bed and surveyed the boxes. “It looks like you’re packing.”
“Oh. Uh.” Right. She didn’t know about the ranch yet. It wasn’t any easier to tell her he’d sold it than it had been to tell Agatha. “We found a buyer. I didn’t see any other alternative. Not with Agatha’s health.”
Mack took another step toward him. “She’s going to be okay, right?”
“Yes.” Thank God. After thinking he was going to lose her…it changed things for him. Life was short and his aunt was right. He needed more.
“She’s made huge strides this week. And she’s as snarky as ever.” Snark wouldn’t help his aunt at the ranch though. “With the limited use of her right side, she’s more unstable on her feet and I don’t want her working too hard. I
don’t want this to happen again.”
Mack nodded, glancing around the room like she had a secret. “What do you know about the buyer?”
“Nothing really.” He tried to read her expression. “I was going to go over and sign the paperwork later today.”
“You don’t have to go sign anything.” Mack reached into her purse. “I brought all the paperwork to you.”
It took a second for her words to register. “You brought the paperwork?”
“Yes.” She held out the manila envelope. “Doug said I could. It’ll make it easier for us both to sign.”
“Both of us.” His heart sped up the same way it had every time he’d kissed her.
She moved closer to him, bringing her hands up to his shoulders. “I bought it.”
“All cash, full price,” he said, completely stunned.
She shrugged like it was no big deal. “I’ve been saving money for a long time—I didn’t even know what for, but when Emery came down to see me and told me everything that had happened, I knew exactly what I wanted to do with the money.”
Nash still found it hard to breathe, hard to say anything. “You didn’t have to buy it.”
“I know I didn’t have to.” Her smile brightened. “I wanted to. It’s the perfect place for me to start my new life.”
“Your new life?” He really had to stop simply repeating everything she said, but he still couldn’t believe it.
“My father and I had a long talk. He told me not to waste my life working in a job that would never give anything back to me.”
She threaded her fingers through his and tugged him closer. “Especially when I know someone who could give me so much happiness.”
“I want to give you everything.” He couldn’t hold back anymore. Nash lowered his mouth to hers. Finally. He kissed her like he’d thought about kissing her all week, deep and rough, holding nothing back.
“I couldn’t stop thinking about you. About kissing you again. About spending the night with you.” He grinned. “In my room this time, not in the stable.”
Mack slid her arms around his neck. “It’s time to stop thinking, cowboy. I’m here. And I’m all yours.”
Mack let her head fall back to the pillow.
Somehow, they’d ended up on Nash’s bed. She couldn’t be sure how exactly, what with all the kissing and her own desperation rising to the surface.
All she’d known was she had to be close to him, touching him, kissing him, making sure he knew how happy she was to be back.
She didn’t know how much time had passed, she only knew if they didn’t get up soon, clothes would start coming off and it would be too late. Then they likely wouldn’t get up until tomorrow morning.
Don’t get her wrong, she wouldn’t mind spending the whole afternoon and night in bed with him, but they had something they needed to do first.
She turned onto her side to face her cowboy, playing with the buttons on his shirt. “We should probably go see Agatha and tell her the news, don’t you think?”
“Do we have to?” Nash slid his hand onto her hip and pulled her body up against his. “I’m ready for bed now,” he breathed against her neck.
She could only manage a whimpering sigh in response.
Nash moved his lips down her neck, then kissed along her collarbone at the V-neck of her shirt. “It’s two o’clock in the afternoon,” she murmured, threading her fingers into his hair.
“That’s okay.” He brought his face back to hers. “I can think of a lot to keep us busy. Trust me.”
Laughing, Mack laid another kiss on his lips. “I can think of a lot too.” His kisses and his hands sparked her imagination. “But I’m also dying to see Agatha. To tell her she’s not going to have to move away after all.”
She’d been so worried about the woman, despite Emery’s news that Agatha continued to make improvements.
Nash sighed long and deep, but he grinned too. “I kind of can’t wait to tell her myself. When I told her I’d sold the place, it was like a light went out in her eyes.” He sat up. “Definitely one of my worst moments.”
Mack sat up too, and put her arms around him. “Then this will be one of your best moments.” She brushed a kiss across his lips.
His hands reached for her jaw, gently cupping her face. “This is the best day of my life. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’m sorry I was too stupid to realize it. I should’ve come after you. I should’ve shown up at your office and begged.”
“I would’ve liked to have seen that,” Mack said with a laugh.
God, if he had shown up at her office, she wouldn’t have been able to resist him.
“One more day of waiting for you to call me back and I would’ve gone to find you,” he told her, resting his forehead against hers. “It might’ve taken me longer to figure out than it should’ve, but when my aunt asked me if I loved you yesterday, the answer hit me hard.”
Mack’s heart swelled, aching against her ribs.
“I may not know much about love, but I want to love you.” Nash pulled her closer, bringing his arms around her. “Every day. I want to learn how.”
“I want to love you too,” Mack whispered. “As long as you’ll let me.” She kissed him again, straddling his lap, reveling in the feel of him against her—all his strength, his tenderness, his intensity.
When she pulled back, Nash was breathing hard. “One more kiss like that and I won’t be able to get out of this bed.”
Agatha, she reminded herself. They needed to go see Agatha and then they could come home and have the rest of the night together.
“Right.” She forced herself to climb out of his lap and stood, her legs shaky. Jasper came hurried over and whined as though it was his turn to get some attention. “Maybe we could take you with us,” she cooed, scratching behind the dog’s ears. She’d missed Jas too.
“I don’t see why not.” Nash stood next to her, straightening his hair. “Car ride, boy? You wanna go for a ride?”
Jasper yelped and did three circles before bounding out the door.
Mack and Nash walked side by side, and he took her hand, leading her through the house and out the door to his truck. He opened the door for her and Jasper hopped in first, finding his way to the backseat where he curled up.
Mack climbed into the passenger’s seat, taking in the view she’d missed so much. The aspens, the lake down in the meadow, and the mountain peaks so close she almost felt like she could touch them. Contentment settled inside of her, warm and full, anchoring her to this magical place.
“Are you crying?” Nash asked as he drove the truck down the driveway.
Mack reached up, touching her fingertips to her eyes. “I guess I am.” The tears flowed steadier. “I can’t believe how much this place already feels like home.”
“It didn’t for me. Not for years.” Nash rested his hand on her thigh. “Not until you showed up in my bed.”
The memory made her laugh out loud. “I’m glad you didn’t call the police.” It had probably been his first thought, and then their story would’ve had a very different outcome.
“I couldn’t.” He gazed at her before turning his head back to the highway. “There was something about you. Something familiar. Something that drew me to you even then. It just took me a while to realize it.”
“Better late than never.” Resting her head against the seat, Mack let herself simply gaze at him. She wasn’t sure a man had ever made her heart pound so hard.
“Agatha will be thrilled to see you.” Nash seemed to be checking Mack out too.
“She’s really okay?” She’d tried to picture the woman in the hospital and it was impossible. Agatha seemed so full of life and joy. It was hard to picture her lying in a hospital bed.
“You’d hardly know anything even happened to her,” Nash assured her. His face sobered. “I was afraid I’d lose her there for a while.”
“That must’ve been horrible.” She couldn’t imagine how hard it mus
t’ve been for him to get that phone call. Heck, her heart had fallen apart when Emery had told her the news, and she’d only known Agatha less than a month.
“I kept thinking about how she was all I had.” Nash stared out at the highway stretching in front of them. “I knew if I lost her, I would have no one.”
“You would’ve had me.” Whether he liked it or not. “You have me.” She slipped her hand into his.
He eyed her with a sheepish smile. “After the way I acted when you left, I was pretty sure I didn’t deserve you. I had all but given up on trying to convince myself we could be together.”
She already knew he’d given up. He hadn’t called her back. “What changed?”
“Agatha gave me a talking-to.” Nash laughed. “That woman can be very persuasive.”
“I’m glad she is.” For both of their sakes. “That first day she found me laying in the parking lot in my wedding dress, she persuaded me to come to the ranch. And it changed my whole life.”
Nash brought her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “I’m really glad you didn’t get married.”
“Me too.” As painful and frightening as it had been to walk away, she’d known Evan wasn’t the right man for her. She’d had to take a risk and leave everything she’d ever known behind to find the man who was right.
The rest of the drive to the hospital went fast. They talked more about his aunt and then about his parents. Before she knew it, Nash had pulled the truck into a parking spot at the hospital.
The stop seemed to rouse Jasper from his sleep. The dog hopped over the seat and sat in her lap. “Don’t worry. You’re coming.” Nash clipped on his leash and they all got out of the truck.
No one questioned them about the dog as they made their way to the third floor of the hospital. On the way down the hall, loud music drew Mack’s attention. It sounded like a classic collection of oldies.
She peered into one of the common waiting rooms as they passed, immediately pulling Nash to a stop.