Committed to the Baby: Claiming King's BabyThe Doctor's Secret Baby

by Maureen Child

  “Wow.” She rolled up the top of the chip bag just a little louder than was probably necessary. “And I can’t think of a single thing around here for you to give me a hand with.”

  “In case no one has mentioned it, sarcasm is not an attractive characteristic.”

  “Takes one to know one,” she shot back.

  “Excuse me?”

  “In case no one has mentioned it to you, self-pity or misdirected aggression are not especially conducive to a warm and happy work place.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means that the staff has come to me with some concerns.” She stacked sections of the newspaper into a pile. “You’ve been rude, abrasive and sarcastic to everyone today. When you’re not biting someone’s head off, you’re brooding and looking like a man trying to decide who to take a bite out of next.”

  “Do you have any idea how paranoid that sounds?”

  “It’s not paranoia if someone is out to get you. You’re in real danger of losing the Doctor-of-the-year award. The nurses, respiratory therapists and ancillary staff normally love working with you. Today—not so much. What’s bugging you, Cal?” With her knuckles fisted on the table Rhonda looked down at him. “What’s going on with Emily?”

  It was on the tip of his tongue to blow her off, but he knew she had a point. He hadn’t brought his A game to work, as far as the staff was concerned and was taking out his mood on them. Rhonda was more than the E.R. nurse manager. She was a friend.

  “That day Emily showed up here in the E.R.? She came to tell me that she had my baby.” He met her gaze. “Her name is Annie.”

  “That’s old news,” Rhonda informed him. “Everyone already knows.”

  “You’re kidding. How?”

  “Mitch mentioned it.” She gave him a wry look. “And this is a hospital. News that interesting spreads like a virulent strain of the flu.”

  “Right.” He knew that. And it wasn’t really what bothered him. “What do you think about giving a baby away?”

  “To someone on the street?” she asked wryly.

  “Of course not. Adoption.”

  Rhonda thought for a moment. “It depends.”

  “On what?”

  “The situation.” She folded her arms over her ample chest. “You’ve seen abused children here in the E.R. just like I have. Under those circumstances they’d be better off with anyone besides the ones they share DNA with.”

  “What about an unmarried teenager?”

  “Why are you asking?” She looked puzzled.

  It wasn’t his secret to share. As Rhonda had pointed out, this place wasn’t covered by the cone of silence. “Emily is involved with a program for teenage girls who have babies on their own because their families don’t support them and they have no place to go. She insists they work and get an education. In exchange reduced-cost housing is provided and the girls trade off child care. Em is their mentor.”

  “Good for her,” Rhonda approved. “But the decision to give a baby up still depends on circumstances. Teens go from thirteen to nineteen. As far as I know they can’t get a work permit until sixteen. What about the ones Emily can’t help? Without assistance how can they provide diapers, food, shelter and medical care? What if they’re not even old enough to drive?”

  Good point.

  When he didn’t comment, Rhonda continued, “Kids raising kids isn’t ideal. Mature adults find it a challenge, so imagine trying to raise a little life while trying to get your own started.”

  He’d actually faced that, then found out it was a lie. And apparently taking out the residual anger on the ones around him wasn’t confined to the E.R. He’d done it to Em last night. And looking at the situation through Rhonda’s eyes was giving him a different perspective. “So you think teen mothers should give up their children?”

  “Don’t put words in my mouth,” she warned. “The issue isn’t black and white. It’s not neat and tidy. Every woman is going to have a different take on the decision. But let me just say that I have a great respect for women who put their baby’s welfare above their own needs.”

  “What do you mean?” he asked.

  “It’s an incredibly courageous decision and a different slant on unselfish love. Imagine a young woman who isn’t in a place where she can give her baby all the opportunities she might wish. Somehow she finds the strength to relinquish her child to two loving parents who are unable to conceive a baby.”

  He looked at her face and saw the traces of pain lingering in the tight mouth and shadowed eyes. “What, Rhonda?”

  She blinked and tried to smile, but couldn’t quite pull it off. “I couldn’t get pregnant.”

  “You wanted kids?”

  “Very much,” she said softly. “My husband wasn’t in favor of adoption. He said the two of us together were good and more than enough for him. We made it work. We’re still together and very happy.”

  “Good for you.”

  “The point is that giving a child up shouldn’t be looked at in a negative way. It’s a chance for that baby to have a shot at a really good life and every innocent baby deserves that.” She rubbed a finger beneath her nose. “Listen to me on my soapbox. I guess you could say I’ve got a soft spot for the little ones.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Bet you’re sorry you got me started.” A puzzled look settled on her face. “But your baby wasn’t given away. She’s with her mom. You know about her. So, mind if I ask why you wanted to know my feelings about adoption?”

  “Just curious.” Again, not his secret to spread around.

  “Emily told you about your daughter. Better late than never. For the record, I’m giving her the benefit of the doubt because I know her. She’s one of the good ones.”

  “You’re not the first one to mention that.”

  And Annie wasn’t her first pregnancy but this time she’d been in a position to take care of herself and the baby. Points to her for that.

  “Look, Cal, this is just my opinion and worth what you paid for it. But—”

  “What?” Since his doctor-of-the-year award was on the line he didn’t say what was on the tip of his tongue.

  “You’re not getting any younger. Unlike the women you’ve been dating recently. And I use the term women in the loosest possible way.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “Don’t play dumb with me. We both know it means that by going out with women barely of legal age you’re weeding out a mature woman who’s going to want a commitment.”

  “The women I see are less demanding. It works for me. I couldn’t be more content with my social life.” It was Emily who disturbed him.

  “You’re spitting into the wind, if you ask me.”

  “And by that you mean?”

  “If you keep creating obstacles where none exist, you’re going to wind up a crabby and lonely old man.” She walked to the door and opened it, then turned back for one last shot. “My husband and I couldn’t have children, but we’ve gotten past it and have a good, fulfilling life. If you don’t make peace with whatever it is that’s holding you back yours will not be pretty.”

  It already wasn’t pretty.

  He’d become attached to a child that never existed because he’d been lied to. Emily was the only woman he’d ever regretted losing, until learning she’d also lied. He’d be there for his daughter. And he’d be there for Emily insofar as it concerned their daughter. If loneliness was the price he paid, he could live with that.

  He’d learned the hard way that being alone was far better than being with someone who made you miserable with lies. Emily was the second woman to make a sucker out of him and no one would get another shot.

  Not even her.

  * * *

  Sometimes being right was hell, Emily thought, navigating the streets to Cal’s house on Saturday. Every instinct had told her he would never understand why she’d given up her baby, not even if that baby went to a loving home that she’d been unable to
provide. Unfortunately he hadn’t disappointed her.

  He thought she was a horrible person. Maybe that was just as well. If she couldn’t put the brakes on her feelings, Cal’s low opinion of her character would do the job just fine.

  She hadn’t seen him since that night earlier in the week. One minute he’d loved her and the next he couldn’t stand the sight of her. This swimming date with their daughter was the last thing she wanted to do, but she’d given her word. Eventually Annie would be comfortable with him and wouldn’t require Em to be around, but today wasn’t that day. Today she had to pretend she didn’t care what he thought.

  Sex with Cal had been a mistake, but that didn’t stop her from wanting him again.

  She steered her car into the driveway and turned it off, then noticed Cal peeking through the living room shutter. God help me, she thought, wishing it was indifference coursing through her instead of anticipation.

  “Rome wasn’t built in a day,” she muttered to herself, exiting the car, then opening the back passenger door. “It will be easier now that I know the score.”

  He walked out the front door. “Hi.”

  Em heard his voice as she reached into the backseat for Annie. “Sorry I’m late.”

  “No big deal.”

  Yeah, right.

  “It was just one of those days when nothing went as planned.” She unhooked Annie from the car seat. “Annie’s nap was longer than usual and I didn’t want to wake her too soon. That would make her crabby for the afternoon and no one would have a good time.”

  She straightened with Annie, who sleepily rested her head on Em’s shoulder. Putting nerves aside, she glanced up at Cal, fully expecting the cold expression that had chilled her to the core just a few days before. Em was surprised to see him not looking that way at all.

  “What?” she asked suspiciously.

  “What, what?” he shot back.

  “You’re smiling.”

  “I’m happy to see you guys.”

  Ah. Because he hadn’t trusted her to show up at all. “I said I’d bring her for a swim.”

  “Yes, you did.” Frowning, he folded his arms over his wide chest. “Em, about that night at your apartment. I want to—”

  “It was a moment of weakness.” She so didn’t want to talk about that night. If only it was a paragraph on the computer that she could delete, effectively erasing the erotic scene from her memory. And heaven forbid he think she was that easy or vulnerable to him. “The thing is, I’d have been susceptible to any man. It’s been a long time for me.”

  “So any man would do?”

  The words were teasing and should have made her feel better but fell short of that mark. “You were handy. That’s all.”

  “I see.”

  “Don’t be offended. I’m just saying. Straightforward and honest.” She shrugged.

  “Good to know.”

  She was tempted to tell him that there wouldn’t be any more moments of weakness but decided against it because she’d assured him she didn’t lie.

  “Actually, that’s not what I wanted to talk about,” he said.

  What else could there possibly be? she wondered. But in the spirit of cooperation it seemed wrong to shut him down.

  “Oh?” she asked, hoping it wasn’t an invitation to more emotional damage.

  “About the way I behaved after—”

  Heat rose to her cheeks that had nothing to do with the hot sun and she reached into the backseat to hide the reaction. The highlights of their last time together had been sex and him being a jerk, making it an impressively bad evening in every possible way. “Forget it.”

  “Can’t.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I acted like an ass.”

  She straightened and met his gaze. He looked completely serious. “Did you just say you were an ass?”

  “I did.”

  “Just checking.” That admission from Cal Westen made her wonder if there wasn’t hope for world peace. “I needed to confirm before saying you’ll get no argument from me.”

  “Thanks for making this apology easier,” he said wryly. “I appreciate your compassion.”

  “What goes around comes around.” He hadn’t made her painful confession of past mistakes easy and needed to know how she felt. She was a grown woman, not a defenseless teen who craved his goodwill, no matter that she wanted it. Getting over him would take time, but she’d handle that, too.

  “I behaved badly.”

  She blinked again. More words that took her aback. “Yes, you did.”

  “I apologize.”

  There wasn’t a cloud in the sky, but she expected lightning to strike her any second. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Who are you and what have you done with Cal?”

  When Annie lifted her head, he held out his arms and she went to him. “Rhonda gave me a different perspective on the issue.” He must have detected something in her expression because he added, “I didn’t share your story. We were talking in general terms. But I had no right to judge. You were right about that and I won’t do it again.”

  “If you say so.”

  “I’ll do my best.”

  Cal nuzzled his daughter’s neck, and Em liked hearing her giggle. It lightened the mood and dispelled the tension between them even though that left little in the way of cover for her to hide behind.

  She followed him into the family room and set the diaper bag on the coffee table.

  “Her swimsuit is on under the sundress,” she told him.

  “Are you going in the pool with us?” he asked.

  “Yeah.” Except now she wished she had her one-piece tank suit on underneath her shorts and T-shirt instead of the bikini. That had been an act of vengeance and now she knew what they meant about revenge being a double-edged sword. At the time she’d never expected Cal to admit he was wrong.

  “Okay.”

  Annie squirmed in his arms, which he obviously knew meant she wanted down because he set her on her feet and managed to slide her dress off before she moved out of reach. When she went for the entertainment center and reached for the electrical cords, he moved quickly, showing his improving protective instincts.

  “That’s probably not a good idea,” he said grabbing her up. When she let out a screech of frustration, he said, “Sorry, little bit. Electricity is not kid-friendly.”

  Em used the distraction to slide out of her shorts and T-shirt, hoping not to draw his attention. “Good work, slick. You’re developing some impressive skills with our daughter.”

  He couldn’t quite hide his once-over of her from head to toe and something like appreciation glittered in his eyes. “Thanks. I simply executed a flanking maneuver that saved her from herself.”

  “TV cords are a constant source of curiosity,” she said.

  “I see she’s done this before.”

  “Every chance she gets.” She realized they were commiserating as parents. Bonding. That was a potential source of trouble. “Baby proofing helps, but there’s no way to remove every single temptation. And I’m not so sure that would be good. She needs to learn there are some things that just can’t be touched.”

  When Cal whipped off his own T-shirt she knew she was looking at one of them right now. He was naked except for swim trunks. His wide, tanned shoulders and broad chest tapered to a flat abdomen dusted with a masculine sprinkling of hair that made her fingers itch to touch. But if he touched her she’d get burned like before. Avoidance therapy was successful for a baby, but apparently not for her. She still wanted him, in spite of the way he’d reacted to her confession. In spite of knowing he was a commitment-phobe, with the exception of his daughter.

  “Are you ready to go swimming?” he said to Annie.

  “She needs sunscreen on first.” Em pulled the tube out of the diaper bag and took the little girl from him, grazing his warm skin with her fingers.

  “You’ve got a pretty impressive skill set yourself,” he marveled. “Hanging on to a slippery toddler can’t b
e easy.”

  “Practice,” she said, finishing up with the cream. Today was all about practicing to resist him. “Do you need sunscreen?”

  The words were out before she realized that would be flirting with danger.

  “Yeah. Thanks.” He turned his back to her.

  She squeezed a large blob into her hand, then smoothed it over his broad, smooth shoulders and the muscles of his back. Touching his warm skin made her shiver, then go hot all over and she forced herself to concentrate, to make sure every inch of flesh was protected from the sun’s harmful rays. Exposure to Cal was not new, but now he represented a different kind of harm.

  “Your turn,” he said, taking the tube from her. He moved his index finger in a circle indicating she should turn her back.

  She did, but not looking at him was only marginally less potent than staring into his sexy blue eyes. Then she felt his big, strong hands rubbing the cream on her neck, shoulders and lower back. He lifted the strings of her bikini top to make sure she was covered and the intimate touch made her shiver again.

  “Cold?” he asked, a smile in his voice.

  “Yeah. You know me and the air-conditioning.”

  “I remember.” He finished as fast as possible and backed away. “Ready?”

  “Hmm?” she asked, glancing over her shoulder.

  “To go swimming. Last one in is a rotten egg.”

  He grabbed up Annie and walked outside, then stepped with her into the shallow end of the pool. Annie slapped the surface of the water with a chubby hand and laughed when she splashed herself. He glanced over when Em closed the slider behind her. The sunglasses over his eyes protected them, but also her from the hungry expression she thought she’d just seen in them.

  Emily sat on the side of the pool and dangled her feet in the water. “We need to give Annie swim lessons. There are programs for kids her age that teach them to be water safe. If she’s going to spend time with you here, it would be a good idea.”

  He stared at her. “You’d be willing to leave Annie here with me?”