by Lacey Legend
“Go ahead,” offered Spencer.
“Promise you’ll give me an honest answer.”
“You have my word.”
“If you had a choice between doing the right thing for someone else or doing something for yourself that might result in hurting another person what would you do?”
“That’s not a black or white question Jenna. There’s a time to put yourself first and a time to put other’s ahead of yourself.”
“But how do you know which is which?”
“I don’t think there’s a textbook answer. I guess my advice would be to choose a decision that’ll ensure you can sleep at night with a clear conscience.”
Jenna nodded her head knowing what she had to do.
“I have to go. I can’t stay tonight. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s fine,” pacified Spencer, sensing her distress. “You know Jenna, it may sound trite, but a problem shared is a problem halved. You should know by now, I’m not a playboy billionaire without compassion or humanity. I might be able to help if you’d let me know what’s going on.”
“I don’t know what’s going on.”
“Let me come with you. That way I can make sure you’re okay and give a hand if you need it.”
Her fingers went to Spencer’s cheek and she stroked it gently. Looking helplessly in his eyes, Jenna wanted nothing more than to curl up in his arms and have a night away from her responsibilities but she shook her head instead.
“You can’t come Spencer. It wouldn’t be right.”
His jaw tightened as though he was steeling himself to deal with the rejection. “Guess I’ll stay here and wait for you.”
“How long will you wait?” asked Jenna.
“However long it takes,” promised Spencer.
Chapter 12
Whizzing through the streets of New York toward Brooklyn, Jenna’s mind was buzzing. Her British billionaire boyfriend, Spencer Lawson, had lent the private car, complete with chauffeur, to her. If he knew Jenna was rushing back home to see her ex-boyfriend, he may not have been so forthcoming with his generous gesture.
Jenna bent sideways to check on her niece in the baby seat. She seemed content and appeared to be dozing off, thanks to the smooth ride of the chauffeur.
“I’ll have to get her indoors before I visit Leon,” she thought.
Staring out the windows, she tried to make sense of what was going on. Jenna had grown up with Leon – they’d been childhood sweethearts. With that kind of history, it was difficult to let go. But their youth had been misspent. Jenna possessed the good sense to get her life on track and attend NYU after high school, but Leon had chosen to become involved with a gang and ended up in jail for petty crime and drug dealing. As young lovers, they’d vowed to let one another go and turn their lives around.
Since his release, it appeared as though Leon had followed Jenna’s lead and had just landed his first legitimate job as a mechanic. However, the vow to keep their distance from each other was proving hard – especially as they lived in the same block of apartments. Jenna was doing her best to keep Leon at arm’s length but could see his loneliness and the struggle he was having readjusting to life outside prison.
Midway through her dinner with Spencer, Leon texted Jenna to let her know he needed to talk. Jenna sensed the urgency in his text and was relieved Spencer gave his blessing to abandon their date so she could address her problems at home.
To avoid risking a fallout with Spencer, Jenna had chosen to be vague about the details of her getaway. With Leon hounding her, Jenna didn’t think she could face Spencer’s wrath on top of that. Jenna was well intentioned; Leon had no friends since leaving behind his criminal past. By the sounds of things, Leon was a friend in need. Jenna was the only available and suitable person for him to turn to in his hour of need.
As a social worker in training, she felt it her duty to assist those in trouble. Deep down, Jenna knew by dropping everything to attend to Leon, she was encouraging and increasing their contact and potentially jeopardizing the foundation of her potential relationship with Spencer. With the interference of the paparazzi, a conflict with her job for the cleaning firm she worked for and Leon’s early release from jail, the couple was constantly struggling to get their relationship off the ground.
They hadn’t even been dating a couple of weeks but Jenna knew her reasons for dating Spencer were far deeper than physical attraction, despite his catwalk good looks. On the surface, he was dashing and charming, and came across as materialistic and something of a playboy. Having witnessed the other side of Spencer, Jenna learnt he was a philanthropist with his wealth and a devoted son, brother and uncle – especially to his niece who suffered from Rett Syndrome.
He wasn’t emotionally available or particularly open, but the glimpses of his sensitivities warmed Jenna’s heart. And her heart was currently thumping in her chest in an attempt to draw her attention to the fact that she may have made an error of judgment in rushing away from dinner to check in on Leon.
Why didn’t I just finish the date and contact Leon later or, better yet, why didn’t I tell Leon I’d visit him as soon as I was available? She asked herself quietly.
As the car pulled up at the grim and intimidating apartment block where Jenna lived, she sighed heavily. It was a far cry from the huge townhouse on Fifth Avenue where she’d been dining earlier that evening.
“May I carry the pram upstairs for you or help with the child?” inquired the driver politely, as he opened the car door for Jenna.
There was a time for independence and pride and a time to accept help. Spencer had obviously briefed the driver that the lift to her building was out of service. Struggling with the pram and baby Zada was a hassle. The driver had a friendly face.
I suppose it’s what he’s paid for, she thought guiltily.
“I’d appreciate that.”
Taking the pram, the driver followed Jenna’s direction and walked her to the front door of her residence.
“I don’t mean to be ignorant, but should I tip you?” asked Jenna, embarrassed she wasn’t familiar with protocol.
“Not at all, Ms. King. Mr. Lawson will be pleased to know you’re home safe and sound.”
Jenna smiled, but felt awful inside. She suspected Spencer had insisted the driver use the broken lift as an excuse to ensure Jenna was accompanied to her door. He was thinking of her well-being, while she’d prioritized her ex-boyfriend’s problems.
Using her keys to let herself in, she was unsurprised to see her younger sister, Liana, lounging on the sofa studying from a textbook. Her sister, however, was stunned to see Jenna home early.
“What’s going on? I thought you and the billionaire would be having a sleepover.”
I should be so lucky, thought Jenna.
“It didn’t pan out that way,” said Jenna cagily.
“Zada hated the nanny, didn’t she? I told you my baby was only happy being cared for by family.”
“Actually, Zada was very taken with Nanny Merton. She was playing with Spencer’s niece and I didn’t hear a peep from her the whole night. She was sound asleep when I left.”
“Oh.”
Liana went to her child. At only twenty, the burden of being a young single mother was eased by her sister’s assistance with babysitting as she attended evening classes, and her mother’s unwavering support by ensuring they were housed, fed and clothed.
“I suppose Spencer Lawson can afford the best care for his precious niece.”
“He can,” affirmed Jenna sharply, “and he has to. Rosie is not a well child. It’s awful to see a little girl in a wheelchair and knowing her quality of life may not improve. Be thankful Zada is healthy and we don’t have that constant pressure.”
Liana looked ashamed of herself. She’d been harsh on Spencer, assuming he was using her sister as a bit of fun. In truth, he’d been perfectly polite and friendly to her – he’d even offered Liana help so that she could devote more time to her studies. In truth, what Liana didn’t want to
admit was that she was jealous of her sister.
She was stuck with a child and part-time education at the age of twenty, while her sister was nearly a qualified social worker with a hot, new, rich British boyfriend. Liana adored her older sister and knew she deserved the best. If Spencer made Jenna happy, then she shouldn’t interfere or put up obstacles because she wasn’t thrilled by her own circumstances and distinct lack of a boyfriend.
“I suppose I jumped to conclusions about the fancy rich boy.”
“You did,” agreed Jenna.
“Do you think it’s too late to take him up on his offer to leave Zada with Nanny Merton this week while I focus on assignments?”
“Given how rude you were to him when he first gave you the opportunity, I’d think it’s very bold to call up and say you want to use his uspcale nanny for free now I’ve given her a positive assessment.”
“All the same, can I have Spencer’s number?”
Jenna looked despairingly at her sister. She loved her dearly, but she could be an absolute trial at times.
“Are you going to abuse it?”
“No. I’m going to ring and apologize for being rude when he visited, and also give my stamp of approval for Nanny Merton to take Zada whenever the two of you want an evening together while I’m at college.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes. And then I’m going to ask him if I can drop Zada over tomorrow morning so I can spend the day catching up on my studies.”
“I’ll think about it,” Jenna said, rolling her eyes.
Liana was a force of nature. Sharp tongue and quick temper aside, her sister had a heart of gold and Jenna knew she wouldn’t intentionally be destructive with her relationship with Spencer.
“How come you’re back so early if Nanny Merton was perfect? Is Spencer an awful cook? Did he give you food poisoning and you didn’t want him to hear you on the toilet?” laughed Liana.
“No. I think Leon might be in trouble.”
Liana’s hazel eyes made contact with her sister’s. Jenna could see the disapproval in them.
“What kind of trouble and why would you want to be involved?”
The silence was thick and heavy in the two-bedroom apartment.
“Not the kind of trouble you’re imagining. I told you, he’s changed. He’s not like that anymore.”
“Then whatever problems he’s got, they aren’t your concern, Jenna.”
“Liana, he has no one.”
“He has his mother!”
“He’s a...you know...Leon’s not going to confide in just anyone and he’s not the kind of guy to randomly ask for help. If he’s reached out to me, I can’t ignore him.”
“You don’t have to ignore him, but you don’t have to drop everything at a moment’s notice to go rushing to his rescue. How did Spencer feel about it?”
“He felt I should go if it meant that I wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight if I chose to ignore the cry for help.”
“That was understanding of him. I’d be fuming if my boyfriend left mid-date, to go and see an ex.”
“I didn’t mention that part,” admitted Jenna.
“Why? If you really want to keep your distance from Leon and he means nothing to you, why didn’t you tell Spencer?”
“Because it’s complicated,” hissed Jenna.
“It’s only complicated when feelings are involved.”
“And feelings are involved.”
Jenna put up her hand to prevent her sister interrupting.
“But not of the romantic kind,” specified Jenna.
“It’s your life. Do as you please. I’m younger than you, Jenna. We had the same upbringing and I rushed into the university to find the first bad boy on campus that I could: like Leon. Remember Zada’s father flew the coop and I have no idea where he is to chase him for child support. He’ll probably never have anything to do with my daughter. A bit like our dad, wherever he may be. Leon is weaving a web specifically for you, and your nobility and soft heartedness will get you trapped in it.”
“I think you’re wrong,” said Jenna, slamming the door as she walked out of the apartment to find Leon.
*
Making her way to the far side of the building, Jenna was glad of the fresh air to clear her head. Some of the comments Liana had made resonated with Jenna. When she received the text from Leon, her first instinct was to help. Leon knew her inside out. He’d have accurately guessed her reaction to his contacting her and he knew she was on a date with Spencer. Had it been a calculated move on his part or merely bad timing?
She knocked on his front door. Half expecting his mother to answer, she was surprised to find the bulk of the brutish Leon greeting her.
“Hey,” he said cheerfully.
He doesn’t look depressed or in need of someone to talk to, thought Jenna.
“Hey yourself. Is your mom not in?”
Leon shook his head. “She’s out with her girlfriends. I expect she’ll spend the night with one of them.” Leon stepped backward and indicated Jenna should enter the apartment.
“You asked me to make time for you and said you needed a friend. What’s going on?” asked Jenna.
“Would you like a drink?”
“Sure.”
“Shall I open the champagne I bought earlier?”
Jenna was going to correct him by identifying that it was only sparkling wine but bit her tongue.
“I’m not certain having an alcoholic beverage right now is the best idea if you aren’t in a good frame of mind,” answered Jenna delicately.
“It’ll improve my frame of mind,” smiled Leon.
Before Jenna could protest, the bottle was opened and she was being passed a glass.
Leon sat beside her on the sofa. He was physically close. Jenna felt mildly uncomfortable and yet she’d spent years on this very same sofa with Leon. Hell, she’d lost her virginity on that particular sofa.
“I’m glad you made time for me.”
“Your text read as if you needed it.”
“I do.”
“As a friend,” started Jenna deliberately, “what can I do for you?”
Leon downed his drink and quickly poured another. Jenna took care to sip hers slowly.
“Dutch courage,” explained Leon.
“What do you need Dutch courage for with me?”
“I’m a man and I don’t like talking about feelings and stuff.”
“Oh come on, it’s me,” laughed Jenna. “Think of what we’ve shared over the years. One of the reasons we lasted as long as we did was because we told each other everything.”
“I know, and now I’m not supposed to tell you anything.”
Jenna found herself downing her glass and refilling it without invitation from Leon. This was not the conversation she was expecting and its direction was dangerous.
“Leon, you and I together was nothing but trouble. We both agreed on that and that’s why we decided to go our separate ways.”
“Sure, sure. We did make that pact when I was convicted. It’s only that I’ve come out of jail and I’ve got no friends.”
“You’ve landed a new job. You’re bound to make friends there. You’re a likable guy. That’s why it was so easy for you to con unsuspecting victims.”
“I don’t do that now,” he reminded her.
“I know. I’m only saying that you don’t even have to make an effort, people are naturally drawn to you. You’ve been hanging round the block since you got out. It’s depressing and full of a lot of losers. You shouldn’t be mingling with them. Of course, you aren’t going to meet any new people until you’re in a situation that allows you to do that. Work will give you that environment. ”
“Jenna, men don’t really discuss the kinds of topics that you and I did. That’s what’s made you special to me. It’s not easy to find that kind of -”
“Friendship,” interjected Jenna, in case he said something inappropriate.
“And now the one true friend I did have, I�
�m not supposed to spend time with her.”
It was awkward. Even Jenna wasn’t blind as to what Leon was skirting around.
“Leon, I haven’t abandoned you. I haven’t been rude to you since you’ve been back and I haven’t avoided you.”
“Exactly. That’s why I think we should reconsider our pact to keep our distance. We’re throwing away a lot of history and maybe something more.”
“Nothing will erase our history Leon but we can’t live in the past.”
“You don’t think the fact that we grew up together and went through so much, doesn’t impact on the present?”
“Of course it does. The reason we agreed we were best out of each other’s lives was because we were holding each other back. Think of the progress we’ve made since we've been apart. My coursework has improved and I’m due to graduate at the end of this academic year.
You’ve started a mechanic apprenticeship in jail and have acquired a permanent job. When we were together, you were dabbling in gangland activities and I was sitting round with no inspiration or future plans. Being apart works for us.”
“It worked for us,” echoed Leon, emphasizing the word ‘worked’.
Jenna could feel her frustration mounting. “I have to be honest, Leon, since you got out and our paths have crossed, and life hasn’t been smooth sailing for me. I mean, I just left a date halfway through because I thought there was something seriously wrong with you.”
“There is something seriously wrong,” growled Leon. “You left your billionaire boyfriend to come see me. What exactly does that tell you? If you wanted nothing to do with me, you’d have steered clear. You certainly wouldn’t run out on a date to visit me at my place.” Leon was passionate and his argument was convincing.
“That’s not how it was,” argued Jenna.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure. I came because I was worried about you, but if anyone sent a text with the same degree of urgency as yours, I’d be inclined to go to them straight away.”
“Why didn’t you call me to see what was wrong?”
“Why am I under interrogation here?” snapped Jenna. “I did you a favor by coming round. I thought you were struggling. I thought I might be able to help.”
