Queen of the City 2: The Life of a Female Rapper

by Tamicka Higgins

  “Any of y’all wanna buy a radio? It’s good quality. Got the AM and FM stations and it even has an ala—”

  “Bruh, get the fuck away from my car. Don’t nobody wanna buy no fuckin’ radio with a cassette player on the front? Who the fuck have tapes anymore? Get the fuck out of here! Scarin’ the shit out of me like that.”

  He rolled his window back up as we watched the crackhead walk away, struggling to stay in a straight line. That is all that was out here these days. I thought about the last time I came here with Junie. We were in the exact some spot I was parked in right now, and no fiends were walking around like there was right now. Tuck kept those niggas away from his spot because they were known to steal any and everything around the area. You could tell he was gone now, but he deserved it and technically, you could say he brought it on himself. If he never had Junie murdered, he might still be running the city right now. Vinny broke me out of my daydream,

  “So, what… what do you know about the kidnapping right now?”

  I peered at the house while I was ducked down in the passenger’s seat, “All I know is Keyonna was the last person I saw before I realized my son was missing. She’s the one who smacked into my car and shit.”

  “Keyonna? The chick that used to fuck with Tuck?”

  “Yeah, that’s her. I knew I should’ve let Nas kill that bitch when he had the chance.”

  “Shit, we in the wrong spot then. Keyonna lives on the south side.”

  “How you know?”

  “I just saw her over there the other day, driving around in a white BMW.”

  “How you know her?”

  “Everybody in Milwaukee knows that chick, especially before Tuck got popped. She was everywhere, you know what I’m sayin’. Hood famous and shit.”

  “Let’s go over there then, shit, this muthafucka look dead as a bitch.”

  Just as Vinny pulled off, a light inside Tuck’s house flickered on, “Wait, stop,” I said to him as he smashed on the brakes. “What is it?” I pointed to the house, “That right there is what it is.” He noticed the light that was just switched on then he looked back towards me.

  “Now what?”

  “Shit, I’m gonna go check it out. Back up and park right there again. I’ma be right back.”

  Vinny parked the car as I crept out of the passenger’s seat. I didn’t have a pistol on me or anything, and I didn’t even realize it until I got halfway to the house, but I didn’t care. The anger I felt right now was enough for me to kill someone with my bare hands. All I cared about was Prince and if that meant putting myself in danger just so I could get him back, then so be it. I walked casually to the side of the house, doing my best to blend in with the few bodies that were roaming around the neighborhood. It didn’t take long for me to make it to the side of the house. The window was too high up for me to peek inside, so I crept around the back, stepping over beer cans and trash that was littered all over the yard.

  The back yard was huge, and there was a shed not far from the house. I could only imagine the number of deaths and tortures that went on inside of there while Tuck was living. The stench hit my nose as soon as I stepped into the yard. It could have been my imagination but then again, so much could have happened back here that the smell just lingered, no matter how long ago everything happened. I crept up to the back door and put my hand on it as it slowly moved it open with the slightest touch. I looked all around me before I stepped inside, still crouched like a thief. The house inside seemed to be abandoned. Drawers were pulled out of their places and flipped over onto the ground. Other than that, the kitchen was empty. The tiles on the floor had begun to bulge in particular places, and the walls were a dingy, off-white color. I crept through the mess and went into the hallway, coming closer and closer to the light that flickered on. I heard a movement, sounding as if it was a spoon stirring inside of pot. I crept closer until I got to the room and that’s when I saw him. He was stretched out on the floor with his head resting against the wall. His eyes were rolled to the back of his head as I looked down at his arm. The string was tied around it with a syringe lying on the floor right next to him. I looked over at another man as he continued stirring the pot, not even recognizing that I was there.

  “What the fuck did you do to him!?” I yelled, running towards Uncle Stew as he lay on the ground, lifeless. The man jumped, knocking the pot of water over that was boiling on top of a warmer. Moments later, he got up and jumped out the window, but I didn’t care about him. I untied the string from Uncle Stew’s arm and slapped him in the face, trying to wake him from his sleep.

  “Uncle Stew! Uncle Stew! Come on, man please, Uncle Stew!”

  The more I yelled and smacked him in the face, I realized that it was anger coming out of me. I was slapping him with more and more force each time but he never even budged. He just took the punishment as the whites of his eyes continued to be the only thing I saw. It was at that moment that I knew he was gone. I stopped yelling and grabbed him around his neck, pulling him closer to me as the tears rolled out of my eyes. His body was still warm and because of that; I knew he overdosed not too long ago. As I peered at him, I saw my Mama’s face appear on his body, and I froze. It was horrifying to see her dead in my arms, and before it became too much to bear, I heard another person come into the room, and I spun around. Vinny stood there with a horrified look on his face, not knowing what to say. As he inched closer to us, he bent down and placed his hand on my back, “Yo, Lyric. Let’s go. Come on.” I turned back to Uncle Stew, and his face had reappeared on his body.

  I held him a bit longer as I cried, rocking back and forth with him in my arms. I know Big Mama said that I shouldn’t blame myself for this, but I couldn’t see it any other way. He was dead and if I hadn’t foolishly left that crack inside Big Mama’s house, he might not have been dead right now. To think that he ended up dying the same way my mama did was something I would never forget. Vinny finally pulled me away from Uncle Stew and helped me out of the crack house, walking with his arm around me until we got to the car. As he drove away, I had to do my best to collect myself. I knew the last time I saw Uncle Stew would probably be the last time I would see him alive. I just never expected to see him dead.

  I refused to let Vinny take me home, and we headed to the south side where he last saw Keyonna. That side of the city was full of Puerto Ricans and Mexicans, and I hadn’t spent much time over there at all to know anything about it. But Vinny? He knew this side well, and mainly it was because most of the chicks he talked to were either Puerto Rican or Mexican. It was 11:30 pm when we pulled into a gas station on 24th and Chambers. We were just on the outskirts of the hood, and I didn’t want to go any further without having a pistol or anything on me. We sat at the same gas station he saw her at for a little while hoping that, by chance, she would pop up. She never did. Vinny looked over at me, “Lyric, you wanna roll? Let’s look again tomorrow, aight? I’ll take the day off.” I nodded my head, and we left. “He’s gonna be aight, Lyric. I promise. We will find my nephew and everything will be back to normal.” As we drove away from the South Side, I got a text message, Hey, baby. I think I’ve found what you’re looking for. I clicked on the photo and up came a picture of Prince, still wrapped in his baby blanket and sound asleep inside of another car seat. Another text message came through right after, I bet it’s fucked up to see somebody take something away from you that you loved. Look, we don’t want to hurt him, but if you want to see this little nigga again, I suggest you give us what we want. Aight? Bye, baby.

  I called the number right after I read the text but the phone was disconnected. I hung up and called back again, getting the same response. “Fuck!” I yelled out, causing Vinny to swerve as he drove,

  “What, Lyric?! What!?”

  “That bitch got Prince!” I said, passing him the phone.

  He looked at it in horror and tossed it back to me, his eyes focused intensely on the road and not saying a word to me. I cried again, punching the dashboard
until my fists throbbed. They had me in a choke hold, and I would probably die trying to get out of it.

  Chapter 11

  I saw him out the corner of my eyes as I crept down a long, narrow hall. He was being rocked in the arms of somebody I had seen before, but I couldn’t quite put the name on his face. I looked around to make sure nobody spotted me and then inched closer to him. He looked as if he didn’t have a care in the world as he smiled in the man’s arms. As I crept closer, his face began to become clearer. Junie sat, holding Prince in his arms with the biggest smile on his face. I stood up when I got to the end of the long hallway, confused by what I was seeing.

  “Junie?”

  He looked towards me, “Whassup, Lyric. Prince just got here. I was wondering when you were coming.”

  Suddenly, the hall that I stood in turned into a bright white glow. I looked down, and it seemed as though I was walking on air but none of that even bothered me, I was focused on Prince. Walking towards him, I held my arms out to receive him from Junie, but Prince didn’t budge. He didn’t even reach back for me; his tiny hands clenched onto Junie’s shirt tighter as he made himself more comfortable in his arms.

  “I guess he doesn’t want to go with you,” Junie said, flashing his new newly acquired, dimple-laced smile.

  “I don’t know why,” I said, then turning towards Prince, “Hey baby, its mama. You don’t want to come with Mama?”

  It seemed as though he looked right through me and turned back to Junie. I looked away, focusing on where I was. This had to be a dream, I said to myself, this is all a dream. Suddenly, Big Mama walked from out of nowhere and came to Junie and Prince. She put her arms around both of them and leaned in to kiss them on their cheeks.

  “Big Mama?” I said, questioning her actions, “you don’t see me?”

  “Oh, Lyric? I… I just wasn’t expecting you, that’s all. Give your Grandma a hug.”

  She walked over to me and squeezed me around my neck, but it all felt fake. It was like I saw these loved ones but I didn’t feel their spirits like I usually did before. They were so distant from me even though they were right in the same room. I turned towards Junie as blood began dripping from his forehead but even with that, he kept smiling. The blood slowly dripped from his head and splashed onto Prince. I ran towards them, but Big Mama held me back. “Big Mama, let me go! Something is happening to them! I have to—” and the moment I spun around, Big Mama’s face changed before my eyes. She was no longer the young-looking, beautiful grandmother I had grown to know. Her skin seemed to cling to her body like Saran wrap and her weight dropped from her body drastically making her appear to look like a skeleton. I jerked away from her, and she had a look of sadness on her face. I spun back around to Prince and Junie only to notice that Junie had completely tilted his head back in the recliner and was no longer breathing. Prince was somehow still in his arms with Junie’s blood stained on his face. I reached towards Prince, grabbing him into my arms and squeezing him tight. His baby coo’s stopped almost immediately when I grabbed him, so I held him to my face only to notice that he wasn’t breathing. “No, no! Prince!” I yelled as I laid him on the ground and snatched his clothing off to see if he was injured in some way. Moments later, Big Mama put her delicate hand on my shoulder, “It doesn’t have to be this way,” she said in a soft, brittle voice. I looked back at Prince, and he still didn’t move, so I grabbed a hold of him to try to wake him up as Junie’s blood was still stained on him.

  “Prince! Prince! Baby, please wake up! Mama is sorry, Mama is so sorry!”

  “Lyric?”

  Vinny looked at me as he sat on the side of my bed with a cold towel in his hand. I had the sides of his arms clamped in my hands, breathing slowly as I scanned the room for a dose of reality. He waited for me to say something as I relaxed and laid back down on the bed,

  “I… I just had the craziest dream, Vinny. I don’t even know what to make of it.”

  “I understand, you don’t have to explain nothing to me, Lyric.”

  “What time is it?”

  “It’s about 8 o’clock.”

  Suddenly, I remembered what I was doing last night and jumped out of bed. I was still in the same clothes I wore yesterday.

  “Prince! We have to find Prince, Vinny! Shit! It’s been a whole night! Why did you fuckin’ let me sleep the whole night!? Anything could happen to him!”

  He watched me frantically run around my room, looking for my shoes, “My bad, Lyric. I knew you needed some rest, though.”

  “Fuck my rest; I need to find Prince!”

  My shoes were playing the vilest game of hide-n-seek at the worse moment. Vinny tried to get my attention, but his words fell on deaf ears as I ran out to the front room. My shoes were right by the front door of the house, and I moved to put them on.

  “Lyric, um. It’s some dudes outside for you.”

  I immediately stopped what I was doing, “Some dudes?”

  “Yeah. They came in here lookin’ for you, but when I asked them to wait outside because Big Mama was sick and I didn’t want her to wake up, they left and stood in the driveway by their truck.”

  I ran to the window and peeked outside. Loc and two other men stood by the car for an escort service waiting for me to come outside. I shook my head, knowing what they were here for. Somehow, they found out about Prince, and they were taking me to see Nas. That was the last place I wanted to go. I thought about escaping through the back door, but that would cause me to have to travel through the city on the bus since they had blocked Vinny’s car in the driveway. I couldn’t get around like that today, not at all. I took a deep breath and put my hand on the door as Vinny grabbed me,

  “Lyric, you sure you want to go with them?”

  “I don’t have a choice, Vinny. Besides, I can find Prince quicker if they are helping me.”

  “Or maybe Nas will have them kill you for letting Prince get kidnapped.”

  I paused before I twisted the handle on the door, “If that’s the case, then so be it. At this point, I fuckin’ deserve it.”

  “I’ma find him, Lyric,” he said as I walked outside. Loc stood up and opened the back door of the car as I got in. Not a word was spoken between us as we backed out of the driveway and headed to Nas’s prison just on the outskirts of the city. I couldn’t imagine what was about to happen to me because of Prince’s kidnapping but whatever it was, I was going to take it head on.

  I sat on my side of the double-plated glass waiting for him to show up. The other inmates walked past me, making as little eye contact as they could. They didn’t want to be the one caught looking at Nas’s bitch; he marked his territory as soon as I came on my first visit. Finally, Nas walked outside, and when he put his eyes on me, he tapped the guard on the shoulder and walked back out. Moments later, a guard came behind me and got my attention, “Miss, please walk with me.” I got up and followed him out of the room as he led me down a long corridor and into another room that didn’t have any glass to keep Nas away from me. It was empty; there were only two chairs and one long table in the room that looked as if it was designed for one-on-one visits. I sat down in the chair as the guard that walked me over left me in there alone. I looked into the corners and scanned the walls for cameras, but there were none. I was going to be alone in the room with Nas with no security, and that scared the shit out of me.

  He finally walked into the room. His chest poked through his shirt, and his arms seemed to have gotten a lot bigger since the last time I saw him. He flashed that dangerous smile at me as he walked towards me. I didn’t know how to react because I wasn’t sure how much he knew. He reached his arms out towards me, “Damn, what a nigga gotta do to get a hug from his bitch?” Nervously, I got up and put my arms around him, preparing to defend myself at any moment. To my surprise, he let me go but not before he ran his hands across my ass. Right after that, he pulled his pants down and sat in the chair. His dick shot up in the air as he motioned with his finger to come to him. I looked back at
the door,

  “What about the guards? What if they come in and—”

  “Bitch, fuck them guards. I run this Muthafuckin’ prison. They on my watch, now bring yo’ ass over here and put yo’ mouth on this dick.”

  I didn’t know what was going on and for the moment, it appeared that he may not have known about Prince. I used that to my advantage and tried to keep the subject as far away from Prince as I could as I came over and slid my tongue up and down his penis. I licked the middle and slowly went to the top as I carefully observed him in the process. He was looking down at me, the same frightening smile he had when I came in never left his face as I bobbed up and down on his dick. I sucked on the tip of it and stroked it slowly with my hand before I put it all back in my mouth, still watching his actions. I wanted to put him so far in a state of pleasure that thoughts of Prince wouldn’t even cross his mind. I put it all the way in my throat and came up, cum dripping from my mouth as he nodded his head. “That’s my bitch right there,” he said, shoving my head back down on him. When I came up the next time, even more cum dripped from my mouth as he ripped my pants off and turned me around. He fucked me so hard that I screamed. I saw the guard look into the room at us, but he just turned back around after he saw what was going on. I was expecting him to come in, but the door never opened as Nas put his dick deep inside of me, pulling my hair and smacking my ass so hard that I could feel the sting even seconds after he made contact with my skin. He only fucked rough for a few minutes before I felt his warm cum shoot inside of me. After he was done, he pulled his pants up and sat back down, “Aight bitch, take a seat.”