Twelve Nights of Temptation
Page 18
“I don’t want to argue, honey.”
“Neither do I.” Tasha realized she didn’t. “But I’m a mechanic, Mom. And it’s not just a day job that I leave behind. I like being strong, independent, relaxed and casual.”
“I can accept that.”
The answer surprised Tasha. “You can?”
Her mother reached out and covered her hand. “I’m not trying to change you.”
Tasha blinked.
“But how does Matt feel about that?”
“Everything’s not about a man, Mom.”
“I know. But there’s nothing like a good man to focus a woman’s priorities.”
Tasha was nervous enough about Matt’s impact on her priorities. “You mean mess with a woman’s priorities.”
“What a thing to say. When I met your father, I was planning to move to New York City. Well, he changed that plan right away.”
“You exchanged a mansion in the Hamptons for a mansion in Beacon Hill?”
“What do you have against big houses?” Annette asked.
“It’s not the house. It’s the lifestyle. Would you have married a mechanic and moved to the suburbs?”
The question seemed to stump her mother.
“I’d do that in a heartbeat. It would suit me just fine. But I can’t be someone’s wife who spends all her time dressing up, attending parties, buying new yachts and decorating Christmas trees.”
“It’s not the same thing. I’d be moving down the ladder. You’d be moving up.”
Tasha retrieved her hand. “I’m on a different ladder.”
Her mother’s eyes narrowed in puzzlement. “Not needing to work is a blessing. When you don’t need to work, you can do whatever you want.”
“I do need to work.”
“Not if you and Matt—”
“Mom, there is no me and Matt. He’s my boss, full stop.”
Her mother gave a knowing smile. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you. And I can’t help but hear wedding bells. And it has nothing to do with wishful thinking.”
“Oh, Mom. Matt doesn’t want to marry me.”
Matt wanted to sleep with her, sure. And she wanted to sleep with him. But he was her boss not her boyfriend.
“Well, not yet,” Annette said. “That’s not the way it works, darling. If only you hadn’t left home so soon. There’s so much I could have taught you.”
“Mom, I left home because I didn’t want to play those games.”
“They’re the only games worth playing.”
“Oh, Mom.”
It was an argument they’d had dozens of times. But strangely, it didn’t upset Tasha as much as it normally did. She realized, deep down, her mother meant well.
“I want you to keep in touch, honey. Okay?” Annette said.
“Okay.” Tasha agreed with a nod, knowing it was time to move to a different relationship with her family. She wasn’t caving to their wishes by any stretch, but her mother seemed a lot more willing to see her side of things. “I will.”
Her mother’s expression brightened. “Maybe even come for Christmas? You could bring Matt with you. He can meet your father and, well, you can see what happens from there.”
Baby steps, Tasha told herself. “You’re getting way ahead of yourself, Mom.”
“Perhaps. But a mother can hope.”
Twelve
Matt sat sprawled on a deck chair in front of his open fireplace. He normally loved the view from the marina building’s rooftop deck. Tonight, the ocean looked bland. The sky was a weak pink as the sun disappeared, and dark clouds were moving in from the west. They’d hit the Coast Mountains soon and rain all over him.
He should care. He should go inside. He couldn’t bring himself to do either.
Tasha had asked him to back off, and he’d backed off. And it was killing him to stay away from her.
Footsteps sounded on the outdoor staircase a few seconds before Caleb appeared.
“What’s going on?” he asked Matt.
“Nothin’.” Matt took another half-hearted drink of his beer.
Caleb helped himself to a bottle of beer from the compact fridge. “Where’s Tasha?”
Matt shrugged. “I dunno.”
Caleb twisted off his cap and took a chair. “I thought you two were a thing.”
“We’re not a thing.” Matt wanted to be a thing. But what Matt wanted and what he got seemed to be completely different.
“I thought she stayed with you last night.”
“That was the night before. When she was in danger. Last night, she went home.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. Oh.”
Caleb fell silent, and the fire hissed against the backdrop of the lackluster tide.
“You practically saved her life,” he said.
“I guess that wasn’t enough.”
“What the heck happened?”
TJ appeared at the top of the stairs. “What happened to who?”
“To Matt,” Caleb said. “He’s all lonesome and pitiful.”
“Where’s Tasha?” TJ asked. Like Caleb, he helped himself to a beer.
“I’m not doing that all over again,” Matt said.
“What?” TJ asked, looking from Matt to Caleb and back again.
“Trouble in paradise,” Caleb said.
“It wasn’t paradise,” Matt said. Okay, maybe it had been paradise. But only for a fleeting moment in time, and now he felt awful.
“You were her white knight,” TJ said as he sat down. “I saw it from the air.”
Matt raised his bottle to punctuate TJ’s very valid point. “That jerk shot at me. There was actual gunfire involved.”
“So what went wrong?” TJ asked.
“That’s what I asked,” Caleb said.
“I asked her to say. She wanted to leave.”
“Her mom really likes you,” Caleb said.
“That’s half the problem.”
“Did you tell her how you feel?” TJ asked.
“Yes,” Matt answered.
“You told her you were in love with her?”
“Wait, what?” Caleb asked. “Did I miss something?”
“That’s your wild theory,” Matt told TJ.
He didn’t even know why TJ was so convinced it was true.
Sure, okay, maybe someday. If he was honest, Matt could see it happening. He could picture Tasha in his life for the long term.
“You moved heaven and earth to rescue her,” Caleb said.
“She was my responsibility. She’s my employee. She was kidnapped while she was at work.”
“I’ve never seen you panic like that,” TJ said.
He pulled his chair a little closer to the fire. The world was disappearing into darkness around them, and a chill was coming up in the air.
“A crazed maniac hit Tasha over the head and dragged her off in a boat.” How exactly was Matt supposed to have reacted? “You were the one who hired a chopper,” he said to TJ.
“It seemed like the most expeditious way to cover a lot of ground.”
“That doesn’t make you in love with Tasha.” Matt frowned. He didn’t even like saying the words that connected Tasha with TJ.
“What would you do if I asked her out again?” TJ asked.
Matt didn’t hesitate. “I’d respectfully ask you not to do that.”
Caleb snorted.
“See what I mean?” TJ said to Caleb.
“That doesn’t prove anything.” Although Matt had to admit he was exaggerating only a little bit.
And it went for any other guy, as well. He didn’t know what he might do if he saw her with someone else. She was his. She had to be his.r />
“I can see the light coming on.” Caleb was watching Matt but speaking to TJ.
“Any minute now...” TJ said. “Picture her in a wedding dress.”
An image immediately popped up in Matt’s mind. She looked beautiful, truly gorgeous. She was smiling, surrounded by flowers and sunshine. And he knew in that instant he’d do anything to keep her.
“And how do you feel?” Caleb asked. The laughter was gone from his voice.
“Like the luckiest guy on the planet.”
“Bingo,” TJ said, raising his beer in a toast.
“You need to tell her,” Caleb said.
“Oh, no.” Matt wasn’t ready to go that far.
“She needs to know how you feel,” TJ said.
“So she can turn me down again? She doesn’t want a romance. She wants her career and her independence. She wants everyone to think of her as one of the guys.”
“She told you that?” Caleb asked.
“She did.”
“Exactly that?” TJ asked.
“She said her life was her own, and I wasn’t going to change it. She said this was how our story ended.”
Caleb and TJ exchanged a look.
“Yeah,” Matt said. “Not going to be a happily-ever-after.” He downed the rest of his beer.
“Wuss,” TJ said.
“Coward,” Caleb said.
Matt was insulted. “A guy shot at me.”
“Didn’t even wing you,” TJ said.
“That’s nothing,” Caleb said.
“It was something,” Matt said.
TJ leaned forward, bracing his hands on his knees. “You still have to tell her how you feel.”
“I don’t have to do anything.”
“Haven’t we always had your back?” Caleb asked.
“I asked her to stay,” Matt repeated. “She decided to go.”
“You asked her to stay the night.” TJ’s tone made the words an accusation.
“I meant more than that.”
“Then tell her more than that.”
Caleb came to his feet. “Ask her to stay for the rest of your life.”
“That’s...” Matt could picture it. He could honestly picture it.
“Exactly what you want to do,” TJ said.
Matt stared at his friends.
TJ was right. They were both right. He was in love with Tasha, and he had to tell her. Maybe she’d reject him, maybe she wouldn’t. But he wasn’t going down without one heck of a fight.
“You’ll want to get a ring,” TJ said.
“It always works better with a ring,” Caleb said.
“It worked for Noah,” Matt agreed. “Do you think I should ask her in front of everyone?”
“No!” TJ and Caleb barked out in unison.
“Noah was sure of the answer,” TJ said.
“You guys think she’s going to turn me down.” That was depressing.
“We don’t,” Caleb said.
“Maybe,” TJ said. “It would probably help to get a really great ring. You need a loan?”
“I don’t need a loan.”
Matt might not be able to purchase two new yachts on short notice. But he could afford an engagement ring. He could afford a dazzling engagement ring—the kind of ring no woman, not even Tasha, would turn down.
* * *
Tasha had found the solution to her problem. She hated it, but she knew it was right. What she needed to do was glaringly obvious. She wrote Matt’s name on the envelope and propped her resignation letter against the empty brown teapot on the round kitchen table in her staff quarters unit.
Somebody would find it there tomorrow.
She shrugged into her warmest jacket, pulling up the zipper. Her big suitcase was packed and standing in the middle of the room. She’d stuffed as much as she could into her gym bag. Everything else was in the three cardboard boxes she’d found in the marina’s small warehouse.
She should hand him the letter herself. She knew that. A better woman would say goodbye and explain her decision. But she was afraid of what would happen if she confronted him, afraid she might cry. Or worse, afraid she’d change her mind.
She’d dreamed of Matt for the past three nights, spectacular, sexy dreams where he held her tight and made her feel cherished and safe. She loved them while she slept, but it was excruciatingly painful to wake up. She’d spent the days working hard, focusing on the challenges in front of her, trying desperately to wear out both her body and her mind.
It hadn’t worked. And it wasn’t going to work.
She gazed around the empty room, steeling herself. Maybe she’d go to Oregon, perhaps as far as California. It was warm there. Even in December, it was warm in California.
She looped her gym bag over her shoulder and extended the handle on her wheeled suitcase. But before she could move, there was a soft knock on her door.
Her stomach tightened with anxiety.
Her first thought was Matt. But it didn’t sound like his knock. He wasn’t tentative.
It came again.
“Hello?” she called out.
“It’s Jules,” came the reply.
Tasha hesitated. But she set down the gym bag and made her way to the door. She opened it partway, mustering up a smile. “Hi.”
“How are you doing?”
“I’m fine.”
“I thought you might come to the Crab Shack to talk.”
“I’ve been busy.” Tasha realized she was going to miss Jules, as well. And she’d miss Melissa. Not to mention Caleb and TJ. She barely knew Noah, but what she knew of him she liked. It would have been nice to get to know him better.
“Are you sure everything’s okay?” Jules asked, the concern in her eyes reflected in her tone.
“Good. It’s all good.” Tasha gave a rapid nod.
“Yeah? Because I thought you might...” Jules cocked her head. “Do you mind if I come in?”
Tasha glanced back at her suitcase. It wasn’t going to stay a secret for long. But she wasn’t proud of the fact that she was sneaking off in the dark.
Jules waited, and Tasha couldn’t think of a plausible excuse to refuse.
“Sure,” she said, stepping back out of the way.
Jules entered. She glanced around the room and frowned. “What are you doing?”
“Leaving,” Tasha said.
“Are you going home for Christmas?”
“No.”
Jules was clearly astonished. “You’re leaving, leaving?”
“Yes.”
“You quit your job?”
Tasha’s gaze flicked to the letter sitting on the table. “Yes.”
Jules seemed to be at a loss for words. “I don’t get it. What happened?”
“Nothing happened.” Tasha picked up her gym bag again. “I really need to get going.”
“Matt knows?” Jules asked.
Tasha wished she could lie. “He will.”
Jules spotted the letter. “You wrote him a Dear John?”
“It’s a letter of resignation.” Tasha made a move for the door.
“You can’t,” Jules said, standing in her way.
“Jules, don’t do this.”
“You’re making a mistake.”
Jules took out her phone.
“What are you—”
Jules raised the phone to her ear. A second passed, maybe two, before she said, “She’s leaving.”
Tasha grabbed her suitcase, making to go around Jules.
But Jules backed into the door, leaning against it. “Tasha, that’s who.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Tasha said to Jules.
“Right now,” Jules
said. “Her suitcase is packed and everything.”
“Seriously?” Tasha shook her head. This was getting out of hand.
Jules’s eyes narrowed on Tasha. “I don’t know how long I can do that.”
“Jules, please.” Tasha was growing desperate. She didn’t trust herself with Matt. There was a reason she’d quit by letter.
“Hurry,” Jules said into the phone. Then she ended the call and flattened herself against the door.
Tasha glanced around for an escape. She could jump out the window, but it was quite a drop on that side. And her big suitcase wouldn’t fit through. She’d probably sprain an ankle, and Matt would find her in a heap on the pathway.
“What have you done?”
“You’ll thank me,” Jules said, but she didn’t look completely confident.
“This is a disaster. We made love.”
“You did?”
Tasha gave a jerky nod. “Do you know how embarrassing this is going to be?”
“I promise it won’t be.”
“It will.” Tasha was growing frantic. “We have chemistry. We have so much chemistry. He practically saved my life. Do you know what that does to a woman’s hormones? I’ll never be able to resist him.”
Now Jules looked baffled.
“Why resist him?”
“Because I’m not going to be that woman.”
“What woman is that?”
“The woman who had a fling with her boss, who lost all credibility. I’d have to quit eventually. I might as well do it now while I still have my dignity. It’s important to me.”
“But at what cost to your future? Don’t you want to be happy, Tasha?”
Someone banged on the door.
“Open up,” Matt shouted from the other side.
Tasha took a step backward, nearly tripping on the suitcase. The gym bag slipped from her shoulder.
Jules moved to the side, and Matt pushed open the door.
He took in the suitcase and the empty room, and then zeroed in on Tasha.
“What are you doing?” His expression was part worry, part confusion.
“I’m resigning.”
“Why?”
“You know why.”
His eyes flashed with what looked like desperation. “I have no idea why.”
“We can’t go on like this, Matt.”