AN INNOCENT MAN

by Margaret Watson

  Holding her cup of coffee, she moved into her office and sat down at her desk. All her records were up to date and there was no correspondence to fill the hour until 9 a.m. when her first patients would arrive. Listlessly she picked up a professional journal and began to read it.

  She hadn't gotten more than a couple of paragraphs read before she heard an insistent knocking on the front door of the clinic. At least an emergency would give her something to do until the clinic opened. Throwing the magazine on her desk, she hurried to the door.

  Connor stood in front of her, wearing his familiar black jeans and leather jacket. She just stood and stared at him, not sure whether he was real or just a wished-for specter of her imagination.

  The specter cleared his throat. "May I come in?"

  "Of course," she muttered, starting to life and moving to one side.

  He closed the door behind him and stood watching her. For a moment neither of them moved, each watching the other. Then she saw the uncertainty in his eyes, the growing fear, and she couldn't hold back for another second. She took one step, and then threw herself into his arms.

  "Connor," she whispered, her face buried in the leather jacket, her arms holding him close. "You're back." Her fists gripped harder on the smooth leather. "You don't know how much I've missed you."

  "Yes, I do." His voice was fierce and his arms tightened painfully around her. "I've missed you just as much."

  She leaned back, brought her hands up to his face. "What are you doing here?" she whispered.

  He smiled, his face more tender than she'd ever seen it. "I couldn't stay away. There was too much I needed here." His eyes twinkling, he added, "Nobody in Denver makes a cup of coffee like Earlene."

  She smiled slowly, joy filling her heart. "Do you think you could make do with mine, instead?"

  "I think so," he whispered. Bending over her, he kissed her with a tenderness that quickly escalated into passion. By the time he raised his head, his face was flushed and she didn't want him to stop.

  "Connor," she whispered, "we're standing in the waiting room. Let's go upstairs."

  He smiled at her again and took her hand as he headed for the stairs. "All right, but anyone who looked in the windows would only see us talking. There's a lot I have to say to you, Sarah."

  Her step faltered as she glanced at him. Had he come only to talk to her? Maybe he hadn't come back to stay, after all. Maybe he just hadn't liked the way they'd parted, and had come to make sure there were no hard feelings.

  She followed him to her apartment, coloring faintly when she saw the mess she'd left in the kitchen. Who cares, she told herself fiercely. If all he'd come to do was talk, then leave, it didn't matter what her kitchen looked like.

  He pulled her down on the couch and sat next to her. Holding on to her hand, he stared out the window for a long time, until finally her stomach began to roil and she couldn't take the waiting anymore.

  "Why have you come back, Connor?"

  He looked at her in surprise. "Because I couldn't stay away any longer." He must have seen the confusion in her eyes, because he dropped her hand and cupped her face. "There are a lot of things I could live without, Sarah, but you're not one of them. I've come back to see if you'll have me here in Pine Butte."

  The fist around her heart began to loosen. "Of course I want you here, Connor. How could you doubt that for even a second?"

  "I said some pretty horrible things before I left last time. And I know I hurt you terribly by not telling you about myself earlier. Maybe you changed your mind about me."

  "Never. I love you, Connor. Nothing you could say would make me stop loving you."

  He drew her into his arms. "I love you too, Sarah, and I'm so sorry for the way I hurt you. I've spent every second of every day this past month regretting what I said to you."

  "It doesn't matter. You're here now, and that's what's important," she said, burrowing deeper into his embrace.

  "No," he said, drawing away from her. "I have to tell you this. You were right, you know. About everything you said. I was afraid to love you, and I was using what happened here in Pine Butte twelve years ago as an excuse to run away. It just took me a while to figure that out."

  She felt her lips curving in a smile as she leaned over to kiss his throat. "What made you realize that?"

  "Mary Johnson, of all people. I ran into her at the hospital the day before yesterday. She said some things to me that made me realize what a jerk I was being. Once I came to my senses, I got here as soon as I could."

  "So you're back to stay?" She held her breath, waiting for his answer.

  "If you'll have me. I figure I can handle the clinic when you're gone, and when you're here we can do it together."

  "What do you mean, when I'm gone? Where do you think I'll be going?"

  He eased away from her and pulled an envelope out of his pocket. "Remember how you told me your dream was to travel? Here's your ticket to the world."

  She stared at him. "Let me get this straight. You came back to Pine Butte so I could leave?"

  "Isn't that what you want? You told me about all the places you want to see and all the things you want to do. I want you to be happy."

  Something melted inside her as she looked at him. "You idiot," she said lovingly. "Do you really think I'd want to do all those things by myself? Do you honestly think I'd walk away from you just so I could travel?"

  "You said it was your dream."

  "That was before I knew you. You are my dream. All I want is to be with you. It doesn't matter if I don't see Europe or China or the pyramids in Egypt. If I do nothing but spend the rest of my life with you I'll have fulfilled every dream worth having."

  "I thought you wanted your freedom."

  "That was before I met you and realized that true freedom is spending your life with the man you love."

  "Sarah," he whispered as he drew her closer. "Does that mean you'll marry me?"

  "Yes, Connor. There's nothing I want more."

  Their lips met, and passion blazed to life instantly. After a moment, he stood up and swung her into his arms and headed for the bedroom.

  They melted together like fire and smoke, feeding off each other's passion and need until they were both frantic with desire.

  "Sweet Sarah, I couldn't think of anything but you," he groaned, sliding his hands over her back and sides, trying to touch her everywhere at once.

  She twined around him, her hands busy rediscovering him. "Oh, Connor, I've missed you so. Please don't ever leave me again."

  "Never," he answered fiercely, claiming her mouth as he plunged into her.

  She rose up to meet him, holding on as she crested and flew off the peak, gasping his name over and over. His arms tightened around her as he poured himself into her.

  They lay together for a long time, holding each other too tightly, neither of them willing to let go. Murmuring endearments and words of love, they clung together as if they would never be parted again.

  Finally she stirred and turned in his arms. Running her fingers over his chest, she tangled them in the soft mat of hair and murmured, "I probably have patients waiting downstairs."

  "I think they'll be willing to wait a few more minutes." As he leaned against the back of the bed, he gazed at her, his eyes full of love. Slowly his mouth curved up in a grin. "Are you sure you won't reconsider about that trip? I'm afraid I'm going to get real lonely."

  Before she could question him, he leaned over to rummage in the pile of clothes that had been hastily tossed to the floor. When he sat up, he held a second envelope in his hand. It was identical to the one she'd tossed on the floor.

  "You didn't really think I was so unselfish that I'd let you get away from me, did you?" He leaned toward her, his eyes glittering. "Sarah, I couldn't bear to be away from you for a day, let alone for a couple of months."

  "What's in that envelope?" she asked, her voice faint.

  He grinned at her and tossed it in her lap. "Take a look."
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br />   She opened it slowly, her heart pounding. Inside was a sheaf of airline tickets stapled together. On top was an itinerary for a two-month trip.

  "That other envelope on the living room floor is the other set of tickets."

  "You know I can't leave, Connor." Anguish filled her voice and she refused to let herself hope.

  "Sure you can. You didn't look at the letter."

  "What letter?" Hands shaking, she opened the envelope again. Underneath the tickets was a single folded sheet of paper. She opened it slowly, holding her breath. It was from one of Connor's colleagues in the Denver hospital, stating that he was looking forward to taking over her practice in Pine Butte for two months.

  "Is it true?" she whispered. "We can leave, together, for two whole months?"

  "I thought a two-month honeymoon sounded good. What do you think?"

  "I think I love you," she answered, dropping the envelope on the bed and throwing herself into his arms. "But you didn't have to do this. I meant it when I said I'd be happy just to be with you."

  "I know you did." He smiled as his kiss trailed down her throat and found her ear. "But I can't wait to make love to you on a beach under a Mediterranean moon."

  It was a long time later when they finally got out of bed and pulled their clothes on. "The waiting room is probably full of people," she said, knowing she should feel guilty but refusing to.

  Pulling her close one last time, he gave her a very thorough kiss then let her go. "Well, then, let's get busy. I don't want them to get the wrong idea about their new doctor."

  She watched him move around the room and thought it was very possible she was going to die of happiness. "Are you going to help me today, then?"

  "Of course." He grinned at her. "You're stuck with me now, lady. And if you decide you don't like the way I practice medicine, that's just tough. So the sooner you get used to me, the better."

  Laughing, she headed for the stairs, saying over her shoulder, "Somehow, I don't think that's going to be a problem. But if you think you can order me around, you'd better think again."

  He caught her in his arms and smoothed back her hair. "Honey, I wouldn't even think of it." He kissed her again, a long, lingering kiss that promised a future bright with love and happiness.

  Then, hand in hand, they walked down the stairs. Connor MacCormac was home at last.

  * * * *