Bodyguard of Love
Page 32
I couldn’t even scream out, I couldn’t even yell loudly with this bliss because I was still tasting Markus…
However he wasn’t being so quiet. “Oh fuck, Cassie, you’re wonderful. You have no idea what you’re doing to me. You feel so… so…” I couldn’t recall him being so vocal the last time we were together, but I had to say I really liked it.
As he exploded that sweet, salty desire into my mouth, dribbling some of it down my chin, my heart fluttered and hammered with pleasure in my chest. Ryan was still working me, causing the intense, powerful orgasm to continue. I was in Heaven, flying high, my head was utterly dizzy with desire. He wouldn’t be long either, I could tell from the way his thighs were tense and trembling. Soon we would all have fallen apart, and unfortunately that moment felt like it was coming for me far too quickly.
I never wanted this moment to end, and it didn’t feel like it ever would. I felt like my body would always feel this great, that this pleasure would never subside. With Ryan and Markus both in this bed I didn’t think I’d ever feel normal again.
There was a chance that I was the luckiest woman alive.
***
Oh my God, what have I done?
I bolted upright in the bed, fear and terror coursing right through my system. I just couldn’t believe it, how the hell had I let that happen? Why did I allow things to go so far?
I glanced down towards the bed, looking down at the two men that lay next to me. They were both so peaceful, sleeping happily with no demons whatsoever plaguing them… but then again, why shouldn’t they? Maybe this was the sort of thing that they did all the time, and I was just another girl in the ever revolving door of women they used for their games.
Shit, I needed to get out, I had to make my escape before the both of them woke up and wanted to have a super awkward chat about the whole thing. There was no way in hell I could discuss that. To be honest I just wanted to forget that it’d ever happened. I’d wrecked everything now, I’d totally messed up any genuine chance I had with Markus, and now I needed to escape before I truly broke down and wept.
I slid out from under the sheets and picked up my scattered items of clothing, cringing every time a memory flickered into my brain; lips, teeth, tongues, torsos, body parts everywhere. My entire body heated up with the utter shame of it all.
Tear pricked my eyes as I covered up my body. This was officially the most insane bold move that I’d ever taken, and I had a feeling that I would regret it forever.
With that thought in mind, I took one final glance at the two men I’d now have to strike off my list of people I could never be in the same room as alone again, then I scurried out the door like a terrified mouse, escaping the vicious, wild cat.
Or two of them, in my case.
This walk of shame was one I’d rather not have taken, I felt like every single person was looking at me, judging me, knowing exactly what I’d done. I kept my eyes fixed downwards so I didn’t have to look at anyone. I just didn’t like the horrible sense that I had inside, I hated the feeling that I’d done something wrong. By the time I crashed through the door to my apartment, there was only one person in the world that I felt comfortable talking to.
Ring, ring…
“Come on, Amber, I need you,” I muttered in frustration while hopping from foot to foot.
Ring, ring…
It wasn’t that early, was it?
Ring…
“Hello?” She finally answered sleepily. “Is everything alright with you, Cassie? It’s like the middle of the night.”
“It so isn’t,” I hissed a little angrily. “Look, I really need to talk to you. It’s so important.”
“Ooh, is it about the party? How did that go? Was it the most magical night ever? You looked incredible.”
I glanced down at the dress I still had on, just because I wasn’t totally sure where my original clothes were. Only this time I couldn’t see it in the same way, it looked a little trashy. “It didn’t quite go to plan,” I warned her before kicking off with the story. “Things got very complicated, very quickly.”
“Complicated how?” Amber was more alert now, intrigued to hear more. “What happened?”
I slumped onto the couch and slid my eyes shut, ready to tell my most shameful secret ever. “Ryan was there, to begin with.”
“Who’s Ryan?”
“Oh my God, don’t you remember anything? Ryan, the guy I kissed at the Christmas party? Markus’s friend?” The more I said it aloud, the worse it sounded.
“Oh no, did he tell Markus about it?”
If only that was the problem! “No, Markus already knew, I told him beforehand. It was just weird. They were like, competing over me.”
“That sounds hot as hell!” Amber exclaimed, not sensing any distress in my voice. “I bet that riled you up like mad, didn’t it?”
I couldn’t help but smirk just a little at that remark. It seemed I wasn’t as strange as I first assumed. Maybe I needed to stop worrying so much. “It did actually… which is how things took a turn for the crazier.”
“What do you mean?” She slurped loudly, clearly relishing this gossip session. Actually it felt good to be the one providing the information for once, usually I was on the sidelines listening to her fun stories.
If only mine didn’t have such a tragic ending.
“Well, we… slept together.” Silence. A silence rang out so loudly I almost freaked out all over again. “All three of us.”
“No. Fucking. Way.” Okay, so she didn’t sound judgy or pissed off which was a good thing. If anything, she actually sounded a little impressed. “Sensible Cassie had a threesome with her hot billionaire boss and his just as rich friend. Are you kidding me? Is this a joke?”
“Nope. No joke.” A giggle rose in my throat. Amber’s shock was enough to wash away at least some of the guilt. “It really happened. And trust me, I’m just as stunned as you are.”
“How was it?”
“Honestly, at the time it was absolutely amazing. I had the best time ever, but now… well, now I feel a bit weird. This morning I freaked out and ran off before either of them could wake up.”
“Why? I thought you were going to marry Markus!”
“He’s hardly going to want to marry me now, is he?” I laughed mirthlessly, hating the reality of that statement.
“Why not? He was just as involved as you, remember?”
“I know, but it’s different, isn’t it?”
“Why?”
Amber stumped me with that question. Why was it different? It hardly made sense, did it? “Dunno, just is,” I eventually mumbled childishly. “Just the way it is.”
“So now what are you going to do?”
Great, another question that I couldn’t answer. Now it was finally time to tell Amber the truth, but that was mainly because all hope was lost. “I really like Markus, I have done for a very long time.” The words felt bittersweet on my tongue. I’d had him, he was within my reach. I could’ve had everything I ever wanted and I threw it all away. “And now I think I’m going to have to quit my job. I don’t think I can face him every day, it’ll kill me. It’s been hard enough seeing him anyway, but now I know what we could’ve been and I allowed one night of madness to ruin it.”
“It doesn’t have to be the end though, does it?” Amber asked me a little desperately. “There are ways around it.”
But I couldn’t see any of them. It was like looking for a needle in a haystack, it just wasn’t there. “I don’t think so,” I told her sadly. “I think this is well and truly over.” And with that, my heart shattered into a million pieces in my chest.
***
I got into work super early the following Monday, because I needed to be the first there. I had to prepare myself for the utter humiliation that was to come. I needed to get myself totally ready for the worst day of my whole life.
I’m sorry, Mr. Smith, I practiced the speech again in my brain. I don’t think I can work for you anymore. I
can either work out my notice until you find someone else… I desperately prayed that he didn’t go for that option. Or I can leave right now.
If I just didn’t look him in the eye, it’d be simple. I could just about get through it without totally losing my shit. I never wanted to leave this job, especially not under these unexpected conditions, but what else could I do? There was no way I could stay with my emotions all over the place, I’d end up going insane.
“Hello there,” I heard him coming in before I saw him. “Hi everyone.” He sounded far too chipper for my liking, like he wasn’t feeling anything like me. The fact that I was potentially about to destroy that happiness had my heart hammering guiltily in my chest. “Hello, Cassie. Do you mind stepping into my office in a moment? I need to speak to you?”
Shit, was he going to fire me before I quit? Somehow that would be a billion times worse because it’d also carry his rejection with it. “Erm, sure,” I stammered, trying to cover up the fact that I was dying inside. Still I couldn’t look at him. My eyes were everywhere but at Markus. “I’m coming.”
Unfortunately, Markus didn’t get the hint that I needed a moment alone, he waited for me which meant I couldn’t even breathe deeply to steady myself. Instead I had to go inside with panic bulldozing through my system.
I tiptoed through the door and took my seat, feeling like I was about to be scolded for allowing that night to happen.
“Are you okay, Cassie?” Markus asked me in a very kind tone of voice. “I feel like you’ve been avoiding me. You ran out…” My eyes snapped up to him as he brought up that night at work. I hadn’t been expecting him to actually speak of it here. Seeing his gorgeous eyes made my heart flip flop unwelcomely in my chest. “And that’s the first time you’ve looked at me since.” He reached across the desk and grabbed onto my hands, displaying none of the sex consciousness I was feeling. “I know it was a bit crazy, but you’re okay, aren’t you?”
“N… no,” I stammered as a reply. “I’m not really.” Everything felt hot and cold all at once. “I think I might have to… to leave. I can’t be here knowing that we… did that.”
“What?” he exclaimed loudly, jumping upright. I winced at the volume of his voice in such a public place, but again he had no self-consciousness about it. “Are you serious? You cannot leave. I can’t let that happen. I need you to stay.” As he moved around to the side of the desk where I was standing, I felt grateful that at least his office had no windows. No one could see the goings on in here. “I like you, Cassie, don’t you get that? You’re the best PA I’ve ever had.”
That comment burned my heart. My feelings for him ran way deeper, I couldn’t see him every day and know that he didn’t feel the same way that I did. “I can’t just be your PA anymore.” My eyes were welling up, I felt pain everywhere. “It’s too hard for me. I know this is my fault, but I shouldn’t have done anything with you knowing that I felt so much for you. Now I’m in a real mess.”
One stray tear escaped and cascaded down my cheek, which Markus rapidly flicked away. “What are you talking about? None of this is your fault. We’re consenting adults, aren’t we? We had fun on all the times we were together, didn’t we?” I nodded slowly, because I couldn’t deny that however much I wanted to. “So what’s the problem?”
He was being dense. I was going to have to spell it out, it was the only way this agonizing conversation would ever come to an end. “Markus, I’m in love with you. I have been for a very long time, and I finally get my chance with you and I blow it because of Ryan. I only like him in a physical way, and I’m gutted that had to be the reason this all ends…”
“Who says it has to end?” Markus interjected, wiggling his eyebrows at me. “I love you too, I have done for ages. The only reason I forced myself to keep away until I literally couldn’t resist anymore was because I know my sexual appetite isn’t to everyone’s taste.”
“Wait.” I held my hands on his chest to stop him for a moment. “So you really liked all of that?”
“Could you not tell?” His smirk made me chuckle, despite the weirdness of the situation. “Look, Cassie, I’ll be honest with you. All my relationships before have ended because I felt like I was forcing my kinkier side on them, that the others weren’t really into it, but with you it comes natural. I don’t get the impression that it’s things you’ve ever done before?” I shook my head, confirming his point, all the while my emotions were dancing all over my body. “But you like it, right?” I nodded silently, my vocal chords seemed unable to work. “So what’s the issue? You like kinky, I need it, I need someone to keep me on my toes.”
This was all resonating so much with me. Maybe this could actually work if we both loved each other enough. He liked thrilling new things, I was definitely up for trying them with him, so what could go wrong? It really felt like nothing.
“I am more than willing to do things on your terms, I would never want to push you into a situation that you aren’t comfortable with, but I love you, Cassie. I want to give us a try. The only question is, do you?”
“I do,” I gasped, clutching at my chest. I didn’t even need to really think about it, the answer was absolutely obvious. Markus had always been the man for me, now I could see just how much.
After all, who cared what went on with us in the bedroom? That was our business only.
“So, please stay and be my PA? And please be my girlfriend too? That would make me the happiest man alive?”
I smiled so brightly I feared my face might crack. This day had gone from the worst ever to the absolute best. I had to be the luckiest woman alive. “I will, to both those questions. Thank you so much, Markus.”
His lips met mine and I felt that chemistry once more, that really powerful spark. How could I say no to any of this? I’d have to be absolutely insane. No one made me feel as good as he did.
“Now I want you to go over there, and lock the office door,” he murmured into my mouth. “You want to try something new? We’re going to have sex in public, at work, over my desk, and I have a little surprise for you in my brief case too.”
“You do?” I could barely breathe with a nervous excitement. “Are you insane?”
“Very, but don’t worry, this room is sound proofed and no one can get in. I am about to show you a very good time. I have the sort of whips and toys in this bag that will drive you wild.”
Ooh, I liked the sound of that!
His seductive tone was enough to have me racing to the door and clicking the lock shut. I wanted to experience yet another very good time with Mr. Markus Smith.
“Do you always carry that sort of stuff around with you at work?” I purred as I flicked the lock downwards. “Or is it only for special occasions?”
“Trust me, Cassie Symmons,” He smirked as he flicked the case open, even laughing as I gasped loudly and clapped my hand across my mouth. “You’re going to find out.”
He reached out for me, and I took his hand happily. There wasn’t a single other person on the whole damn planet that I would be willing to take this crazy sexual journey with, but when it came to Markus, I knew that he’d be worth it. Just because he was a freak who wanted to unlock my crazy passionate side, didn’t make him any less sweet or caring. He was the perfect man for me, and I had a feeling that we were going to have a very happy life together.
“You know I’m going to have to marry you soon, right?” He smiled as he grabbed me for a kiss. “I’ve never met anyone as perfect as you.”
“Do you know what? I don’t think being your wife would be the worst thing in the world,” I teased as I glanced over his shoulder to see what he had. “Now get that red thing out, I want to see what that does.”
Yep, this might not be a very traditional happy ever after, but I got the impression that it was going to be mine.
THE END
= Bonus Book 5 of 9 =
Taken by the Aliens
“Hey Tessa, I knew I would find you here. Want some lunch?” Smiling, Tess
a turned away from the view to see her friend Lindesty approaching with two lunch bags in her hands.
“Sounds good space sister, thanks,” she answered. Lindesty laughed and handed her a lunch. She sat next to her in front of the observation window.
“You really love this view, don’t you?” Lindesty asked. Tessa nodded and removed the prepackaged meal from the bag. She twisted the knob on the side and there was a popping noise. The meal container began warming up.
“I do. The security guard who caught me when I got to Station One came by a minute ago. He asked me if I regret stowing away on the cargo ship. I told him as long as I can get a look at this view I have no regrets,” Tessa told her friend. The label on the food pack changed to a tan color indicating it was done. She opened the package and the smell was heavenly. She looked at Lindesty in surprise.
“This can’t be real chicken, can it?” Tessa asked softly. Lindesty grinned and opened her lunch too.
“Yep, I got a line on a man who brings it in for the station’s brass. He gets enough extra so he can sell some on the side. Amazing huh?” she said and they both dug into their meal.
“Thanks Lindy, I really appreciate this. Breakfast was a little slim. Do you guys need me at the booth today?” she asked before biting into another piece of chicken.
“Yep and for the rest of the week if you want. I also wanted to let you know the boss is looking for another dancer,” Lindesty told her.
“You know I can’t dance. I can fight and I can dazzle you with my computer skills, not dance though,” she reminded her friend.
“I know; it just seems you wouldn’t have to be living on the edge like you are. I worry about you Tess,” Lindesty told her and Tessa reached out and squeezed her hand.
“I appreciate it but I am fine. I may not always eat as well as I should, but I am getting by. Not to mention I am able to network with customers at the sales booth. Eventually one of the tech guys will hire me despite my record. You’ll see. I will get where I need to be eventually. Like I told the security jerk, this view is all I need for now,” she said gesturing at the stars outside the station. Tessa couldn’t get enough of it. Lindesty patted her shoulder.