Forbidden Fate (Sisters of Danu Book 1)
Page 12
“When you heard that I was nay longer Baine’s wife, I suppose I expected a bit more of a reaction from you, more excitement, mayhap. You haven’t even mentioned what we are going to do next.” She shrugged and leaned her head back into Liam as his warm breath spread along her scalp.
He scooped her hair to the side and delicately grazed her long white neck with the flesh of his lips. “In one day, you lost your child, found out about your dissolved marriage, learned why Baine tried to kill you…I didn’t think mentioning marriage was a good idea at the moment, Gwynneth. How many more emotions can I pile on you?” He picked up the lavender scented lye soap and the square piece of linen, lathered it up and squeezed the fragrant soapy water onto her hair as she tilted her head back.
Scooping all of her hair up into a pile on her head, he gently lathered while massaging her scalp, giving her neck small sporadic kisses from time to time. Gwynneth felt cherished and loved. This was a man who would never take advantage of her body, even when she wanted him to. He respected her honor and wanted to give her the chance to make what she wanted of her own life, without pressure from him.
Gwynneth relaxed her body and slumped into the water, her breasts just barely peaking over the top, while Liam used a clay bowl to scoop water out of the tub and pour it over her hair to rinse out the soap. Knowing he had struggled for years to do what was best for her, she decided it was time for her to do what was best for Liam. “Marry me, Liam,” her words came out as a breathless sigh, escaping from deep within her soul.
His hand stopped working and, though he was behind her, she could sense the change is his demeanor. Coming around to the other side of the tub, he leaned his face in so close that their noses were touching and their eyes were locked. Speaking softly as his breath tingled against her face, he said, “Is that what you want, Gwynneth? What YOU really want? Not just what you think I want?”
“Well, this is what you want, isn’t Liam?” He inhaled deeply and closed his eyes, taking in the warmth of the water drifting up to his face, the smell of the lavender in Gwynneth’s hair and the sound of the fire crackling away. He was all sensory; every detail around him was being saved to memory, adding to this moment.
“Aye,” he growled and captured her mouth with an intensity that even startled himself. His kiss was sensual, savoring the taste of her. His hands came up to her face and he ran his fingers through her wet hair. Their tongues were moving together in perfect unison as Liam took her lower lip in his teeth and gently tugged at it as he pulled away, releasing his mouth from hers.
With his hands still resting possessively on both sides of her face, he looked into her eyes with an intensity that it made her entire body melt. “Aye, I will marry you, on the morrow at the Samhain festival. You will become my wife and be mine forever.” Never breaking his gaze, he gave her one more rough kiss and pulled away quickly, leaving her breathless in the tub.
He saw a chill run over her skin and realized the water must be freezing by now. “Do you need help out?” His passion dissipated, quickly replaced by genuine concern for her comfort. She smiled at his ability to be so sensual, yet protective and nurturing, all in the same moment. She shook her head and stood up straight in the bath tub, all weakness gone and a confident smile on her face.
Liam was standing before her with his eyes glazing with lust, looking up and down her sleek, naked body and watching as water dripped down every curve. Then his gaze rested on her face. She was smiling at him seductively as she stepped out of the tub. Afraid she may stumble, Liam bolted forward quickly and wrapped himself around her for support. Once she was steady on her own two feet, he loosened his grip around her waist only slightly, never moving away from her dripping body.
Gwynneth placed her arms around his bare shoulders. Water droplets ran down his muscular back and the ripples of his chest, soaking his linen bandage. She slowly raised her lips to his and gave him a long, sensual kiss, suckling on his tongue as he released a moan. Liam ran his hands down her wet back, sliding his fingers up and down her spine. She released him and stepped back slightly, removing his hands from her back and placing them on her sleek, dripping breasts.
His thumbs gently ran back and forth over her nipples, watching them tighten in response to his touch, but she could see the hesitation on his face. “Gwynneth, I love you, and I want you badly, but not like this, not after what you’ve been through today. It wouldn’t be right. Your body needs to rest and I’m not that sort of man. I will not take advantage of your sore and weakened body.” He removed his hands and placed them on her hips, pulling her slightly forward to give her a soft kiss. “I hope you understand.” He looked up at her, waiting for signs of sadness or anger to cross her face, but she only smiled in response.
“I know, Liam, I know you are not that man, and that is one of the reasons why I love you. I never expected you to bed me tonight. My body is still very weak.” She paused, looking away from him shyly and whispered, “I just want to touch you.” She dragged her fingertips down his shoulders, over the ridges of his chest, down his soaking wet bandage and lower, over the muscles of his abdomen. Stopping just at the base of his low-hanging trousers, she ran her fingers through the short black hairs that trailed below.
“If you can’t touch me, let me touch you.” Her voice was a hot whisper against his ear and it sent shivers down his spine.
“I told you that I would let you make your own choices from now on, mo chroí. You have been controlled by men your entire life. I will not be one of them.” Liam placed one finger under her chin and tilted her head up so he was staring into her sparkling green eyes and brushed his lips lightly against hers. “But only if you are certain. I have waited so long to feel your touch, Gwynn. I can wait as long as you need. Your health matters more to me.”
She was still dripping wet and Liam saw her entire body break out in gooseflesh. Shaking his head to regain his focus, he gestured toward the clothing chest near the bed and said, “Let me at least help you get your night dress back on.” He started to walk away, but Gwynneth gripped her hand firmly around his arm and shook her head. Leading him over to the bed, she playfully shoved him down onto the fur-strewn mattress.
He plopped down on the edge and just stared up at her, not knowing what she had planned. He had waited years for this moment, for Gwynneth to be standing before him naked, offering her body to him. But, he never thought it would happen like this, when he could not touch her in return. He wasn’t entirely sure he was capable of being pleasured and not pleasuring in return, but he would keep his promise and allow her to take charge. As worried as he was about her strength, she was exuding a confident air that he had not seen from her in so long. He loathed to say anything that may crush her spirit. It was her body, and her decision, he reminded himself as he fisted the bed furs in his hands.
The tips of her wet hair were draped over her shoulders, tiny rivulets of water sporadically running off the ends and down the slopes of her bare breasts. The water collected at the tip of her hard pink nipples, ready to fall. Liam grunted painfully at the sight. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying harder than he ever had in his life to control his desire, wanting more than anything to take her breasts in his mouth, to flick the water off with his tongue.
Watching Liam struggle for control as his eyes squeezed tightly shut and his jaw muscle ticked, Gwynneth smirked with satisfaction. Knowing she had that much power over him was enthralling and she felt like a goddess, empowered with control over his body. She was weak and dizzy, but she would not let Liam know. She wanted to make him feel loved by her after all the years he had to stand by and watch her be with another man. Feeling her legs begin to give way, she decided to hide it swiftly and climbed up onto the bed, placing one arm on either side of Liam’s head and straddling his hips with her legs.
His eyes were still clenched shut and she was thankful, for if he opened them now, he would most assuredly see her limbs wobbling from the exertion of holding her body over his. But she wanted th
is for him and she would find the strength to continue. The hearth fire popped loudly and Liam’s blazing blue eyes popped open with a start. Not sure what else to do to keep his focus off of her weakness, Gwynneth pried his tightly clenched fist from the furs of the bed and placed it on her breast. “Touch me, Liam.”
His fingers hesitated at her peak and she could sense that he was unsure. Leaning over him fully, she pushed her breast further into his callused palm and seared his lips with hers, slanting her mouth across his with a skill she did not know she owned. His body relaxed under hers as his taught muscles released and she smiled to herself. He was letting go of his control. With a low groan from his throat, Liam deepened the kiss and squeezed her breast in his hand, running his thumb over the tip while gripping the back of her neck with his other arm.
If Gwynn kept at it, Liam was going to lose control for certain. He could feel the tightness in his trousers and very much wanted to feel her hands upon his inflamed skin. But something felt entirely wrong about this situation. Aye, he had promised to let Gwynneth chose her own path in all matters from now on, but this? He sensed her weakness, and yet he sensed her need to hide it even more strongly. Would she be furious if he made her stop? He felt like a beast, after what she had been through only that morning. But pride was a delicate thing, as carefully crafted as a web, and as easily broken. He would not break hers, he decided. If she felt weak, he must trust her to say so, for forcing her would only harm their newly rekindled connection.
He felt the lightest graze between his legs, almost as soft as a feather, but aye, he felt it and his hips instinctively thrust forward, seeking more, even though his mind told him to pull away. Her tongue still danced with his as his hand moved to her other breast, reveling in the softness of her skin and the sweet scent of her hair as it hung all about his face. All of his instincts were on high alert, trying to climb up and over the walls he had built to keep them at bay. He wanted to grab her by the hips and flip her body beneath his, taking what his blood boiled for.
Gripping her hair in his fist, he reigned in the needs threatening to spill over, but only just barely. She was the sweetest torture he could ever have dreamed of, and resisting the very thing he had desired for so long was taking its toll on his aching loins. As if reading his thoughts acutely, he felt her touch again, but this time it was firmer, more distinct. He felt it again and knew what she was doing. “Gwynn…” he pulled his mouth away from her and stilled her hand. “Are you certain? You are weak.”
Her fingers stilled on the ties of his trousers and her voice shook. “Nay. I am not,” she forced out in frustration and yanked on the tie. His trousers slackened and he groaned at the immediate relief of gaining a little more freedom for his aching hardness. The confines of his trousers had been painful, but now it was downright excruciating to be so close to her nakedness, to see her entire body exposed and covering him, and yet not being able to touch her where he most wanted to. “Let me do this, Liam.”
There was an unveiled warning in her tone, and he grit his teeth to bite back a retort. She was a stubborn lass; he would give her that. He plopped his head back upon the furs of the mattress and stared up at the solid oak beams of the ceiling and watched the smoke escape through the thatch. He had to focus on anything other than his intolerable need to take control. He was not used to allowing a lass so much power over him, especially in the art of love making. Taking a deep breath, he realized his entire body was shaking with the effort.
Her warm soft hand slipped under his loosened trousers and made first contact with his tight, burning flesh and he hissed like a pot of boiling water. By all the gods. His skin was on fire, burning hotter than the hearth and her grip tightened upon him like a vice. Not since he was a lad did he think he may lose himself from a simple touch. Buy nay…Gwynneth’s touch was anything but simple. It was majestic, like the sun’s rays spreading over the horizon in streaks of gold at the first break of dawn. It was as if he had never been touched until this moment. Her hands began to move up and down his length and he fisted the furs once more with a grunt of suppressed urges. “Och, Gwynn,” he growled. His body tensed and he began to shake in earnest, feeling his need about to release.
Gwynneth’s body trembled. She would see this through, she was determined. Liam knew she was weak, in spite of her many efforts to hide it. She should have listened to him and stopped. He would be furious if he knew how ill she felt right now. Why was she so stubborn? Perhaps because her need to show her appreciation for all of his sacrifices was stronger than her need to rest. She could rest later. For now, she would show Liam how much he meant to her.
She knew he was at the edge of his control. She had him gripped in her hand and she had to admit he was much larger than she ever would have imagined. In a way, she was thankful for this moment. Now she knew what to expect upon their wedding night on the morrow. For, if she had only seen it right before he made love to her, she may have hesitated and ruined the moment. Would it fit? She wanted to laugh at herself for pondering such a ludicrous thing. But she was too weak to laugh even at herself. She knew she should be increasing her pace to match his needs, but she felt all of her energy draining by the moment. Her arm ached and her legs wobbled.
Perhaps she should try something different. She needed to finish what she had started. It was too late to confess of her weakness, but her hand and arm were not up to the continued challenge. Releasing him from her grip, she saw him shift and open his eyes in confusion. Forcing a seductive smile, she licked her lips and began to lower her head. He would like this for certain. He would find release and her poor body need not work so hard.
His eyes widened as he watched her mouth descend upon him. He was ready to ignite at any moment and just the way she licked her lips was enough to do the job. He was straining for release; it was just at the surface. Why she had stopped when she did, knowing he was so close, made him worry for her. By all the gods, he must love this woman if he were so able to think concerning thoughts for her while she was pleasuring him so.
As if the entire world were moving in slow motion, he took in every moment with discerning detail. Gwynneth’s smoldering green eyes. Her trembling lips as she leaned in to take him in her mouth. Her damp hair hanging wildly about her perfectly sculpted face. But even those images were not powerful enough to hide the most important details of all. The sweat dotting her forehead and the trembling of her limbs as she tried to force herself upright. Nay! He had told her she was too weak!
“Gwynneth!” He pushed himself into a sitting position and slid his arms beneath her, moving her onto his lap. Her entire body shook and she could barely lift her head. “Och, Gwynneth…why? I tried to tell you---”
“Nay. I am fine Liam. Let me finish…” She tried to grab for him, but the moment was lost. His blazing skin had cooled and he tucked himself back into his trousers.
“NAY! Gwynneth! Why did you do that when I told you to stop?”
“You let me choose, remember? I chose to…make you…happy…” she tried to argue back, but her voice was weak and her head hung limply against his chest. Her labored breaths tickled the hairs on his chest and one soft hand rested against his bandaged ribs.
Liam wanted to roar at her. He wanted to shake her and punch a wall. But just as he had suppressed his desire to touch her, he must now suppress his need to rage. “Do you think I am happy right now? Do you think seeing your life drained from you pleases me? I am very angry with you...” He bit back the rest of his words. Nothing good could come from finishing what he really wanted to say. But, by Cernunnos’s horns, she made him feel like a bastard. How could she believe, even for one moment, that he would ever put his pleasure before her well-being? Had he ever? NAY!
“Please, Liam. Don’t be angry. I…love you.” A tear ran down her check and soaked into his already damp bandage. Making shushing sounds, he leaned her back into the mattress and ran his fingers through her disheveled hair, mesmerized at how it shimmered like a star in the light o
f the hearth.
“Och. Mo chailín stór. I love you more than you know. You are more important to me than all of the world. Why would you ever think my pleasure was worth your health? Do you know how beastly it makes me feel to think you believe I would have allowed you to make that choice?” He stood up off the bed and walked away.
“Where are you going? Liam?” Her voice broke and so did a piece of his heart. He came back with her night dress and gave her a small tug, lifting her up slightly so he could cover her body.
“I am not Baine. I thought you knew that. And if you want me to allow you to make decisions, you had better try and make better ones in the future.” He wasn’t trying to be cruel, but as she bit her bottom lip to suppress more tears, he knew he had gone too far. “Gwynn. I love you. YOU. Not what you do for me or how you make me feel. I will never put my needs before yours. I am not Baine. Do you understand me?”
She nodded and wiped a tear away from her temple just before it reached her hairline. “Aye.”
“Alright.” He said softly and tilted his head to give her a smile. “You need sleep.” He climbed into the small wooden bed and pulled the curtains closed around them, shuttering them into complete darkness. The hearth still allowed them warmth as he lay his body down next to hers and wrapped his arm snuggly around her waist.
Feeling her abdomen, still slightly rounded from where her child had been only the night before, he laid a gentle kiss on the roundness of her belly and rested his head on her. Her body started to quake as a sob resounded in their small intimate space. Reaching up, Liam ran his fingers across her cheek to wipe the tears and gently kissed her nose. “Let’s get some sleep.” They both lay together on the bed, foreheads touching and breath mingling. Together, they fell asleep in the first moment of peace they had ever truly had together.