A Light in the Dark_Survival of the Fittest

by Christina Kirby

  Oliver shot to his feet and crossed the room in three strides until they were nose to nose. “Fuck me? Are you serious right now?”

  “Look, man—”

  “No, you look, man. This isn’t how our family deals. We handle whatever comes our way, together. You got me?”

  Bailey knocked Oliver’s arm out of the way and stormed past him.

  “We’re not done here.”

  “I’m taking a shower, or is that something else we do together as a family?” Bailey slammed the door and turned the water as hot as he could stand. Of course, he was worried. What kind of moron wouldn’t be, but damnit he didn’t want to pull Oliver and Lexie back into this crap. And, their mother . . . she’d finally found some happiness, and what? They’d call her and she’d come running and once again her entire life would be spent researching doctors and specialists and foods he should eat.

  He sat down and tried to get a grip on his thoughts, the cold stone sending a chill through his back. He didn’t want to be angry or bitter. What he wanted was to be back at his place in Oxford cozied up with Brie. Or, in Splash Pad listening to her teach. Hell, wherever she was, was where he wanted to be.

  The shower did its work and though he didn’t feel any better physically, he at least smelled less like the bottom of a bottle and more like a human. When he went to the kitchen to grab a cold bottle of water out of the fridge, his brother was waiting for him on one of the bar stools.

  “Better?”

  Bailey rubbed his towel over his wet hair and let it hang around his neck while he gulped down half the water in one breath. “Good enough.”

  “So, what did the doctor say?”

  “Nothing yet. I’m waiting for the blood tests to come back.” He crossed to his couch and flopped down. Flipping on the television in search of a distraction, he settled for a surfing competition, but Oliver wasn’t deterred. His brother sat in the chair beside him and turned his knees toward Bailey, ignoring the TV completely.

  “Bailey, you beat this thing once and you can do it again. Even if you’re acting like a complete dick, we’re still here for you.”

  Bailey sighed, “Look, I know you mean well, Ollie, but . . . I just can’t. I can’t stand the thought of starting over.”

  “Well, what about school? When this is all said and done, can you go back?”

  Bailey shrugged as the darkness threatened to move back in. He hadn’t bothered to call Mr. Catling yet. What was the point? If he was sick again, he’d have to quit when he’d barely gotten started and they wouldn’t hold his place forever, nor would he want them to. Returning to Oxford wouldn’t be the same if he was gone for any length of time and even if he did, it would become tainted the same way L.A. had. Bad memories would encroach on the good. And, there wouldn’t be Brie.

  Oliver nodded, thoughtful and then asked the question he’d been dreading more than any other, “And, what about Brie? What’d she say when you left?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Nothing?”

  “What are you a parrot now? Yeah, nothing. Are you going deaf from too many shows?” Bailey stared at the television as his hand balled into a fist. “Can we please drop this?”

  Oliver narrowed his eyes. “I’m having a hard time believing that Brie didn’t say anything about you leaving. Not one little thing.”

  Bailey snapped and launched his half-empty bottle across the room. “She didn’t say anything because I didn’t tell her.”

  There was a beat of silence while his brother tried to process his words, his forehead wrinkling in confusion. “So, like, you didn’t tell her you were leaving, or didn’t tell her you might be sick?”

  “Either. I just left. What’s the point of dragging her into this?”

  “Holy shit, B. What were you thinking?”

  Bailey’s head snapped around. “I was thinking that she doesn’t need this, doesn’t need me piling all my baggage on her. She has everything going for her right now and I won’t stand in the way of that.”

  “But, she loves you.”

  “I know and that’s why I didn’t tell her. She would’ve demanded to come along and it would’ve derailed her career. I won’t do that to her.”

  Oliver shook his head and tried a different tactic, “Bailey, I know your heart’s in the right place, or whatever, but you can’t do that to her. You can’t just leave.”

  “I already did.”

  “So, let me get this straight. You’re throwing your life away over something that may or may not come to pass. What happens if you aren’t sick? What then, B? You go back to school and return to Brie and what? She’s just supposed to forgive you?”

  Bailey raised the remote and turned the volume up, keeping his eyes trained on the screen.

  Oliver stood and made one final plea. “Listen,” he shouted to be heard over the television announcers, “I get that you’re in a bad place right now, but for being one of the smartest guys I know, you’re acting like a complete moron.”

  “Gee thanks.” Bailey shook his head. “This coming from a guy who barely graduated high school.”

  “Yep, you’re right Mr. Valedictorian. You’re the smart one, but so what. At least I know a good thing when I see one. At least I know how to treat a woman.”

  “Oh, yeah, because it was so hard to get Lexie to like you with all your money and fame. Please.” Bailey regretted the words as soon as they were out of his mouth, but he couldn’t stop himself. He’d been spoiling for a fight for days and based on the cold fury emanating from Oliver, it looked like he was going to get one.

  With a face twisted in anger, Oliver bent down, grabbed the towel hanging around Bailey’s neck and hauled him to his feet. “Okay, smart guy, that’s enough. You want to sit around here and have a pity party, fine, but don’t you dare talk about my wife.”

  Using the couch for leverage, Bailey shoved Oliver, but Oliver didn’t let go. Together they crashed through the top of the coffee table, sending splintered wood shooting in every direction. Bailey raised his fist, but Oliver caught it, and they rolled until Oliver was on top of him. Oliver raised his fist and Bailey blocked it a second before it hit him square in the jaw.

  Using his legs in a maneuver taught to him by a Jiu Jitsu professor, Bailey escaped his brother’s hold and got to his feet. Oliver followed and they circled each other, eyes sharp and matching tempers on full display.

  “Anytime you want to quit, just let me know. I can go all day.”

  He should’ve stopped. Oliver was twice his size, but instead, Bailey let out a feral cry and charged his brother pushing him into a wall and sending a glass encased platinum record crashing to the floor. He punched Oliver in the face, a trickle of blood appearing on his lip, but he didn’t have time to land a second one. Oliver spun Bailey until he was the one against the wall and a second framed picture fell.

  “Why don’t you just say it, Bailey?” Oliver shook him while trying to ward off his punches. “Say what this is really about.”

  “Shut up.” Bailey struggled to hit Oliver, but Oliver pulled him in closer, engulfing him in a bear hug he couldn’t escape. Frustration, sadness and fear, filled him up as he tried to jerk himself free.

  “It’s okay to be scared, B. I’m right here. We’re all right here.”

  “This isn’t how it’s supposed to be.”

  A sob ripped free from Bailey’s chest as his feeble attempts to punch Oliver faded and he dug his fingers into his shirt. Oliver stood there amongst the destruction, anchoring him as he’d done their entire lives, holding him while the stress of the last few days and worry over what might happen came out in haggard chokes and sobs until there were no more tears.

  When they pulled apart, Oliver rested a hand on Bailey’s sweaty shoulder. “When you love someone, you don’t push them away, yo
u pull them in as tight as you can and never let them go. It’s a partnership.”

  Bailey’s chest tightened around the shards of glass that were once his heart, understating full well that his brother was talking about Brie, but he’d made his decision. She deserved a future and he was going to have to live with his choices no matter how much it hurt.

  “Yeah well. You’d know better than me.” Bailey swiped a hand across his snotty nose and knocked some glass shards out of his hair. “Hey, I’m sorry about what I said about Lexie. You know I didn’t mean it. Hell, I like her more than I like you.”

  Oliver grinned. “It’s all good.”

  Bailey pointed at his face. “You might want to get cleaned up. You look like shit.”

  Oliver nodded toward Bailey’s living room. “So does this room. Good luck with that.”

  Oliver booked it to the door.

  “What was all that crap about having my back?”

  “Not when it comes to domestics, little brother. That’s all you.” Oliver laughed and then announced, “We’ll see you at our place for dinner tomorrow night,” as he slammed the door.

  Chapter 26

  Brie awoke with a start, heart pounding, hands sweating while the news droned on in the background. The nightmare hadn’t been new. She was calling out for Bailey as he stood on the edge of a bridge, rushing water and jagged rocks below him, but he wouldn’t turn around. When she’d mentioned her dream to Jessica the day before, her flatmate had been sure it was a sign, and though she didn’t put much stock into the idea, she couldn’t shake the feeling something was wrong.

  She pinched the bridge of her nose to ward off the headache throbbing behind her eyes. Four days. It had been four days since she’d heard from Bailey and she wasn’t the only one. Working hard not to come across as the needy girlfriend, she’d waited two days to start grilling the guys, but John and Cohen hadn’t seen or heard from Bailey either. It was as though he’d never been there at all.

  The door opened, and Jessica rushed in, her hair transformed into a different style than when she left. Her showcase was less than twenty-four hours away and she was running on all cylinders.

  “Hey, sorry, did I wake you?” She tossed her bag onto the chair and stripped off her shoes.

  “No, I was awake, but only just.”

  “Good, you needed some sleep.” Jessica sat down on the sofa beside Brie and rubbed a hand over her back. “Still nothing, huh?”

  Brie shook her head and fought the urge to cry. She hated feeling lost, but she bit back her tears and inhaled through her nose and out through her mouth. She refused to be that girl, one who sat at home crying over a guy who wouldn’t call and it was Jessica’s time now. It was Brie’s job to act like a supportive and slightly more put together version of herself than she currently was.

  “I told Cohen to stalk his place and to call the second he heard anything, but he said so far, there hasn’t been so much as a closing door from that side of the wall. John’s been feeding Bowie because apparently Bailey left him a message asking if he would, but other than that . . .”

  “This is so unlike him.” Brie slapped her hands on her knees and stood, trying to ignore the sting at the idea he’d called John, but not her. “I keep worrying something bad has happened to him and he’s lying in a hospital somewhere, but, and I hate to admit this, I called around and no one has seen him. Does that make me crazy?”

  “Oh, my Lord.” Jessica’s eyes grew wide.

  “What? I mean maybe a little, but I don’t think it’s completely crazy to—”

  “No, look, Brie!” She swiped the remote off the table and turned the volume up on the television.

  It was the celebrity segment of the program and when Bailey’s face filled the screen, Brie’s breath caught in her throat. He was leaving a hospital in California. There were palm trees in the shot and though he seemed oblivious to the picture being taken, there was no denying it was him complete with day old stubble on his chin and his infamous denim jacket.

  The news correspondent threw out several theories about why Bailey might be there, but it was obvious no one had any clear answers. After a minute, Brie tuned out the anchor and focused harder on Bailey’s face. The difference in his appearance in the handful of days since she’d seen him was shocking. His cheeks were drawn and new lines were visible around his eyes, not to mention the circles. It didn’t look as though he’d slept at all.

  “Brie.”

  When they moved onto the next celebrity scandal, Brie continued to stare at the screen too stunned to move or speak.

  “Brie, are you okay?”

  She shook her head and blinked. “Yes, I’m fine, but . . .”

  Jessica nodded. “I know . . .”

  They both stood there, locked in a state of confusion. What had happened? Why hadn’t he told her he was leaving? Why hadn’t he answered her calls? Was he okay? Was it his brother? Had something happened to one of the other guys?

  Jessica’s phone screeched the familiar tune to her favorite song and she pounced. “Hey, Cohen. Yeah, we saw it. You lot, too, huh? What?” She pulled the phone down below her mouth and met Brie’s gaze.

  “Cohen said some girl just went into Bailey’s place. Long brown hair, but not someone he knows.”

  Simone.

  Brie yanked on her coat and headed for the door. “I’ll be back later.”

  “Do you want me to come with you?”

  “No, it’s okay. I think I know who it is.”

  She shut the door and ran. She didn’t have another way to contact Simone and if anyone knew what was going on with Bailey, she would. Or, she would at least know how to get ahold of someone who did.

  The slippery sidewalks slowed her progress while the cold air burned her lungs, but when she arrived, her speed was rewarded because the unfamiliar car Cohen had mentioned was still parked out front. Panting, she knocked on the front door to Bailey’s flat.

  “Come on. Come on.” She bounced on her toes as her adrenaline started to wane and knocked again.

  The knob let out its familiar squeak as Simone opened the door with Bowie in her arms. “Brie.”

  “Hey, Simone.”

  “Come in.”

  They stood in the middle of Bailey’s place, the silence around them strange. The usual noise of the television or music was absent, but other than that nothing was different. The place was stuck somewhere between its usual state of slightly messy and comfortable making it seem as though Bailey might join them at any moment.

  When Brie’s eyes shifted to the duffle bag sitting on the table and then met Simone’s gaze, she raised a hand. “Oh, no. This isn’t what it looks like. I’m only here because I got a call from Lexie. Bailey’s not even here.”

  Brie smiled. Her goal wasn’t to put Simone on the defensive and no matter what Bailey may or may not have done, she wasn’t worried about him cheating. He wasn’t the type and deep down she knew he wouldn’t do that to her. Whatever was going on with Bailey was beyond anything so cliché.

  “I don’t think it looks like anything, and I know he isn’t here. I just saw him on the tele.”

  “Okay, good. I didn’t want you to think . . .” Simone sunk down into the worn chair and stroked Bowie when he nuzzled her hand.

  Brie crossed to the sofa and sat down. “Imagine my surprise after days of worrying about where Bailey was and why he hadn’t called, and then seeing he was in the States.”

  “He didn’t tell you he was going? I mean, he didn’t tell me, either, but it’s different with you.” She scratched under Bowie’s chin. “Men can be such idiots.”

  Brie shrugged, though at the time, she was inclined to agree. “He didn’t say a word and when they showed him on the tele, he was leaving the hospital.” She leaned forward, her elbows on her knees,
“Listen, Simone, I know you don’t know me very well and that your loyalty lies with him, but I’m worried. Is he okay? Is it his brother? What?”

  Simone’s eyes darted to the ceiling like she might be sending up a silent prayer.

  “Simone, please.” They locked eyes. “I love him.”

  Simone blew out a breath. “It’s not that I don’t want to tell you, but in truth, I don’t know much. I was at work when I got a call from Lexie asking me to come down here and pick up a few things for Bailey, and then she begged me to help find a home for this little guy.” She paused to rub Bowie’s head which he showed his appreciation for by closing his eyes and purring louder. “I didn’t even know Bailey had a cat.”

  “His name is Bowie. Bailey found him outside and when he saw how sick he was, he took him to the vet and paid to get him healthy. And, he’s been feeding him ever since.”

  Simone stroked Bowie and then turned her gaze on Brie. “That’s a very Bailey thing to do.”

  They smiled at each other, understanding flowing between them.

  “Look, all I know is that he went in for some tests and as of yesterday, they didn’t know the results. And, with Bailey’s past, they’re all obviously worried.”

  Brie’s stomach sank. The hospital. Tests. As the understanding of what might be happening slammed into her, she shot to her feet. “Would you mind giving me Lexie’s number?”

  “Um, yeah, I can do that.” Simone struggled to dig her phone out of her purse and then listed off Lexie’s number.

  Brie’s brain moved a hundred miles an hour as she typed in the digits. Bailey could be sick. Right now, he could be sitting in California and getting the worst news of his life. Her chest tightened at the idea. “I-I have to go.”

  “Brie, are you okay?”

  “Yeah,” Brie called over her shoulder as Simone followed her to the door. “Thanks for taking care of Bowie. Could you maybe hold onto him for a little while?”