I shouldn't be here. I stared up at the roof and swallowed. I'd never seen such a high ceiling. Thor walked next to me as the other men in their party bowed out.
"One day this will be the epicenter of my city. The ruins were once great buildings that reached high into the clouds. We will find a way to go there again."
The poisoned ruins still had things that could kill anyone with a slow, painful death. I'd never go into Camelot and he was crazy to want to be like our poor ancestors.
He led me across the hall without a word about my filthy dress. I turned around and saw the mud. If there was something to change into, I'd come back and clean everything. My mind raced back to our conversation as I rubbed my head. "You're stuck in legends and myths. Reality is something different."
His back seemed to straighten as he led me up the stairs. "Reality bends. Dreams don't."
He was so like my father. I swallowed, but couldn't stop myself. "You're a fool."
My entire face flamed and then the fire inside me dissipated. I didn't even care what I said to the king. Now that my father was dead, I supposed he could kill me. Who would defend me? I was alone in the world. My eyes misted and I gazed toward the floor again as we walked down a hall.
Outside a dark wooden door with more black metal markings, we stopped. He bent down. "This is your room. Good night, my lady."
I had a room, where I could hide beneath the covers. I released the tattered hem of my dress. The smell of male testosterone invaded my senses as I glanced up to his muscular shoulders. Underneath his helmet that for some reason he still wore, he might be handsome or he might be horrible under his chain metal, and I was curious. My memories of the glimpse tell me he's magnetic. A sigh escaped my throat. "The sun is about to break, Sire. It's morning."
He stretched out his hands. "Then stay up if you like. That's your choice. I'm tired."
I covered my face to hide my yawn. "You're impossible."
"And you wish to start a fight. Perhaps after you've slept and eaten, you'll be in a better mood."
A chuckle escaped my lips at his astute observation. "There is no better mood for me to be in where it concerns you. Rest won't change my mind."
He stepped backward, lifted his arms to his sides and bowed toward me. "It will increase my patience. Good night then."
I opened the door, but didn't step in until I lost sight of him walking down the hall. "Good night."
My heart was lighter, but I clenched my hands and refused to be calm. Perhaps if I was clean, I'd make more sense of what just happened. I turned into my room and stared at the huge bed. Ten or more of me might lounge on that mattress. My straw bed at home had room for me alone. The red and gold bedspread was deep in color and I wondered how it might feel on my fingers. It looked so pretty that I'm afraid to touch.
The white and gold walls were so clean that someone must have washed them before I arrived. I turned my attention to the two other doors in the room. I made it halfway across the wood floor when the door behind me opened. I turned. My blood pressure shot up as I wondered if Thor would dare come inside, but then a light-haired girl about my age came in with a basket of items. I let out my breath, but hugged my poor stomach. "Who are you?"
She curtsied and lowered her brown eyes. "Your maid, my lady."
Her complexion was clean and her hair tied away from her face. The ties had never held my thin always knotted mop of brown. I let go of my waist, but pressed my lips together. Mother had been a lady's maid, but I had no idea what that even meant. "What is a maid?"
I didn't see any ill-will in her expression.
I quieted my suspicious thoughts to listen as she said, "I am here to help you get clean so you don't ruin the sheets and the bed."
My cheeks prickled and I assumed I blushed. "I don't have anything else to change in."
"Your trunk will be brought up shortly. I will find you a clean dress in the meantime. Why don't we get you into a bath?"
I stepped in her way. "My trunk is here?" Thor brought my things. I hadn't known and my blood caught fire again. It had been packed that day without my knowledge. He and Father must have conspired.
I was too tired to spit fire. I bit down on my lower lip. I might survive if I don't think about Father.
The maid passed me and opened the last door in the room. She walked inside and hummed. The song was a melody my mother used to sing. I stepped inside and stared at the white basin. This room was like something that belonged in those large ruins of the sky buildings that burned long ago. Most people who washed in the city owned houses near each other with similar rooms. "What is that?"
"It's a bath tub, my lady." With kind eyes, she went down on her knees and turned a ceramic knob. Water poured out and I stared at her. It worked. She stood back up. "It's like how you jump in a lake to be clean, only we keep ours inside."
So many questions float in my mind. I inched closer to the water that filled the white basin. "You know about lakes?"
She dropped something in the water that made it bubble. Then with her gaze lowered, she said, "You might not remember me, my lady, but we stayed at your small camp when my father was on the run."
I had no idea who this clean, fresh-faced girl was. I crossed my arms as once again my blood boils. "From Thor?"
Her mouth fell open, but then she shook her head. "No, from Caesar Rex."
Everyone seemed to defend Thor. I'd have to discover on my own how duplicitous he is. He has to be, no man could be that kind, but for now I dropped to my knees and reached inside the water. It felt warm and suddenly I wanted to be clean. I hoped whoever my mother helped had been kind to her. I tried to smile as I asked, "What's your name?"
She smiled with no false pretense, showing a slight gap in her teeth. "Nel."
"I'm Gwen." I stood up and offered my now clean hand to shake hers. "Nice to meet you again."
She covered her lips and refused my hand, but turned around to help me with my dress. "I'm happy the Queen will be you."
I held the neckline of my dress tight to my throat, avoiding her quick fingers. I was not about to be naked with her, a perfect stranger, in the room. I sat down on the edge of the basin to remove my boots, on my own. How had Nel ended up here at the castle? "What did your blood test reveal you to be?"
"My lady, it is my duty to assist you." Nel placed a warm cloth next to the bathtub. "I was to be a merchant and make pots and pans, but my hands shook every time I got near the sheet metal."
Nel waited patiently and as I freed my foot, she took the shoe. I stared at her as she did it again with the second shoe. "So do you enjoy work as a maid, Nel?"
The woman in the streets had wanted to change her fate and gone to Thor. He probably let her switch positions, so the blood tests weren't always aligned with talents. I had a good reason to be freed. With a bounce in her step, she set a bottle next to the basin. "Use this to clean your hair, my lady. And yes, King Thor allowed me to do this instead."
Nel didn't seem to mind questions. My eyes narrowed, though I yawned. "What do you mean allowed?"
The basin was full of water. Nel paid that more attention for a moment as she knelt back down to the handle and turned again. The water stopped pouring. She stood, wiped her hands on her skirt, and said, "I went down on my knees and begged him to let me do something where I might eat."
"Eat?"
"I couldn't make money with pots and my brother was starving because I shook all the time. Thor told me I could come here instead."
My mind cleared. "So he gave you a choice?" Perhaps I might believe him that he'd not force me. With time, he might not even want to marry me.
"Yes."
I dipped my toe into the warm water. I closed my eyes and realized that I smelled like a horse. "With this bath I might clean my skin?"
"I can help you, my lady."
"No. I want to be alone."
Nel backed up like she'd leave now. "Yes."
This was the first conversation I had in a long time
where I wasn't on my guard. I swallowed. "Who invented this? Is it in all the houses?"
Nel picked up a cloth that looked soft and placed it next to the bath. "No, not yet. Merlin invented it, but he wants to ensure everyone has them."
I rubbed my arms. The room was growing hotter and my dress itched. I should tell her to go, but answers eased my mind. "Merlin is the knight that rides with Thor, right?"
Nel laughed as she walked toward the door. "I wouldn't call him a knight, though he rides well. He says he's an inventor, but we all call him a magician. Who else but a wizard could create water flowing inside the house? Now, take off your clothes."
I stood straighter. I'd absolutely not get naked in front of her. "No, thank you."
"Modest? I understand. Here." Nel opened the door and stepped out so that she was in the hall and I was in the room with the tub. "That dress is filthy," she said from behind the door. All that was visible was her open palm. "Hand it to me, and I'll wash it."
My mind was a fog, but I would not just get undressed, with nothing else to put on. Perhaps in the bathtub I might scrub it like I would in the river. "I'll wash it myself."
Her fingers turned up and she motioned for me with one finger. "You won't have time. I have a new dress for you, once you are finished, and something to sleep in."
The water would stop the incessant itch of my skin. I lifted the material above my head and handed Nel the dress. "I am too tired to argue with you."
Her finger pulled out, and she almost closed the door. "Good."
She closed the door and I stepped into the bath. The water stung at first, but my body adjusted. I stared at the bottle she left and decided I'd wet my hair. The water worked its magic as my muscles weren't nearly so tense.
I then picked up the bottle she left and held it upside down. It smelled like lavender, so I shook it to get the flowery liquid out. It was like soap, but smelled nicer than the stuff I made. I worked it into my hair and then decided to rub it all over my skin.
As a liquid it seemed to get into my skin deeper, but I used more of it than I would a bar. Not that this truly mattered. I yawned again and pushed myself back inside the water to ensure the soap was off me. Satisfied, I stepped out and wrapped myself in the warm cloth. The bath had done wonders for my mood.
As I opened the door, the colder air hit my skin and I cringed. I lowered my gaze as Nel handed me a dress. I'd sleep in anything, so I didn't bother to look as she held something over my head. I maneuvered and worked the gown over my shoulders where I was fully clothed then dropped the cloth to the ground. I didn't have any energy left to fight anyone.
Nothing mattered except the dark cloud over my life. Nel pointed me to sit on the chair, and I followed her directions. She combed out my hair and I sighed. The silence ate at my skin. As I stared into a mirror, I saw my face. The dress I wore was soft and didn't itch anywhere. My mother would never see me like this. Not my sisters, or my father. No one I loved. My straight hair almost shined and it never did that before.
My hands shook though they rested on my lap. My oval eyes became bloodshot but I didn't cry. "My father is dead."
Nel massaged my shoulder. "I'm so sorry, my lady."
At least I didn't shake, though as I thought that my entire body did just as I feared. I ran my hand through my smooth hair. "Everyone at our camp died because Father sold me to Thor."
Nel placed the comb on the desk and then smiled at me. I saw through the mirror that Nel had transformed me. I seemed like some well dressed lady that wore clothes like mother had stored away in her bedroom. "Your father sent you to safety."
Despite how my body had wanted to sleep, fire burned inside my soul. "He sent me into a war."
Nel shook her head. "You're safe here, under King Thor's protection."
Everyone was so deceived. Nel. My father. Everyone. I'd never trust him. I stood up and at least my body shook less. "How?"
Nel walked over to the bed and rolled the blanket back, just as Mother had done for me and my sisters. "He protects us all."
No man was capable of that. My father couldn't protect me. No one could protect anyone. Thor was no different. "That's impossible. How?"
Nel stepped back as I made my way to the bed. "They say the gods have blessed him with magic, like Merlin, and that they gave him the power to take Excalibur on his own."
Magic. People thought the forest haunted so they stayed away because of magic. People thought knowing the differences in berries and what they did for the body was magical. Maybe I believed in magic and maybe I didn't. I'd never seen it. The pillow was soft under my head as I lay down. I craned my neck toward the door. "Nel?"
She stood at the door with her head bowed. "Yes?"
She was the first person I hadn't fought with in a day. I hoped I wasn't rude, with all my questions. "I'm all alone here, so your kindness is appreciated."
"It's my job..." She coughed. "I mean my honor to help you, my lady. Now go to sleep."
The door closed and my room was dark. I was so numb that I closed my eyes.
The outline of Thor as he stood in the doorway came back to me in my dream. If my father couldn't protect our family, there was no way the fate of the world rested on his shoulders. No mortal man of flesh and blood was capable of holding us all together. Underneath that suit of armor rested the beating heart of a human, and we're all screwed up.
Chapter 6
Birds chirped, waking me. I threw off the heavy covers on my bed and sat up. The room was pitch black. My eyes adjusted and I scanned the space. Perhaps in this fortress the moonlight and stars in the sky didn't penetrate my window, but my ears heard those birds. I inched against the headboard, my gaze settling on shadows at the furthest wall. I put my hand to my throat. A woman was there, in the dark, and my gut told me it wasn't Nel. "Who are you?"
The woman lit a candle and the flame brightened the entire room. I flinched as I noticed her one brown eye and one blue eye, though her nose and mouth were perfectly formed. She smiled and showed her white teeth as she moved from the wall to the chair before the mirror I'd sat in earlier.
I stayed quiet, waiting until she answered. "As you should know, I'm Morgana Le Fay."
Why should I know this woman? I scooted to the edge of the bed. I refused to be scared by someone my age and height. "I don't know you. Am I supposed to?"
She blinked and then leaned closer in the chair. "I'm the king's sister."
Thor's blue eyes pierced through me. Morgana's certainly didn't. I pressed my lips together. Thor had family. He sent her to spy on me. I rolled my shoulders and tried to stop the tension from hiking up my spine. "Oh, I didn't know Thor had a sister. He never said."
"Doesn't surprise me." She didn't blink once as she returned my perusal. "I'm the other person with the queen gene."
I rubbed my head. Genes and blood didn't explain why she watched me sleep. My stomach had a huge knot in it, and I wanted to shield myself. "There's someone else with this curse?"
She sat forward. I turned away from her two different eyes. Morgana didn't say anything. I fought how my skin crawled and gazed at her once more. With a calm tone, she said, "My family was born to be royalty."
She could have it. I lifted my chin. "I was born in a forest and belong there, not in a palace."
A huge smile grew on her face. My chest tightened at the sheer joy in her voice as she asked, "Really?"
I covered my face as heat rose through my body. "Perhaps I revealed too much."
Morgana stood. I grabbed my comforter and twisted it. Where was she going? She walked toward the door. "Honesty is refreshing around here. I found this conversation fascinating."
My gaze narrowed and I fumbled off the bed to stand. She paused at the door. "My father died," I told her. "I don't want to care about anything. I just want to be alone."
Morgana folded her hands together. "Guinevere."
"Gwen. Just call me Gwen. How do you know my name?"
She watched/studied me like
I was a mouse and she was a cat. "I'm Thor's sister. Did you expect me not to?"
I swallowed. I had to make this conversation right. With my sisters, if I felt bad, I could explain it all away. "I don't expect anything from anyone."
Morgana's stare had the power of a snake set to hypnotize its victim. "Gwen, I hope for both our sakes we get what we want. I'd rather be your friend than your enemy."
I massaged the back of my neck as my body trembled. "There is no need to hate each other."
She smiled again and my feet itched to run away. "One never knows the future. Let's not worry about things that may never happen."
I'd verify what she just said. If she was Thor's sister, that meant there were two queens, and he didn't need me. "Where is Thor?"
"He's probably preparing to go into battle with his men. I'd check the wall, if you're off to find him."
Mother always said to be nice to people. My body grew colder the longer I talked to her, but I bowed. "Thank you."
She laughed at me like I'd done something funny, then threw open the door. The candle flames blew back from the wind. "I'll take my leave, Gwen. I enjoyed our conversation."
I rubbed my arms. Morgana was not my friend.
It was best if I left, but I had to find a way to escape. I doubted Thor would just let me go after yesterday's ride. These people were not ever going to be permanent fixtures in my every day. There had to be another way.
First I had to find Thor.
As I left my bedroom, Nel rushed down the hall and ushered me back inside. I didn't know what was wrong so I stepped back as she seemed like she'd throw herself on top of me. She closed the door and heaved, "You can't go out like that, my lady."
I stared down at the soft, fine purple dress with a modest neckline that went down to my toes, and thankfully didn't scratch anywhere. I decided I wanted to keep it, if possible, so I crossed my arms, prepared to argue. "Why not? I'm covered. It's nicer than my own dress."
Nel leaned against the door, her skin carrying a green hue as if she were sick. "It's not proper to walk around in your nightdress. I'll lose this job."
Whispers of a Throne Page 5
